Shannalee

In the beginning I only told a few people and it was great. Just recently I have informed everyone and I have been getting mixed reviews especially from one of my best girlfriends. It is heart breaking but you know that making a decision like this is probably the hardest thing we can do. This isn't something we can decide to do and in the end just forget that we had this done. Shame on him for starting out positive and ending like he did. I am proud of you for taking the steps to make a better you and a more healthy you

Today was my first surgeon’s appointment and I have got to say that my surgeon is awesome. He was great to talk to and he was really amazed as to how far I have come to quitting a lot of things already. He believes that I can be very successful in this process. Now I am sure he says that to all his patients but I do believe that I can be successful. After talking with the surgeon I talking with my case manager. Now she is a cool person and she just recently had surgery herself….8 weeks out and she is bubbly and so nice. We talked about my insurance requirements as well as what they expect. In the beginning I thought that my smoking and having to wait 6 months before I can have the surgery was way too far out but seeing my schedule and everything I have to do before it now doesn't seem too far way. I am actually excited now because we are shooting for a May surgery. I was amazed and wondered if my insurance would take a long time but she said that as long as I meet the requirements it shouldn't take long especially since my BMI is 66 and even if I did lose weight I would still be in the range to qualify. So I have my first dietitian appointment on Friday and I meet with the nurse on January 4th to start my 3 month supervised diet. OMG….I am actually in this process and can’t wait to see what is next. I am not going to put a number on how much I want to lose. I want to be able to feel good in my body no matter the number that I lose. And so it begins….

I would seriously have a long talk with her and let her know how you feel about this stuff in your home. That maybe in time it will be ok but until them please keep them outside the home. Sometimes people just don't understand how hard this process is and when you throw things like this into the mix it makes it harder. Have a talk with her and come to some sort of agreement. I am sure she'll be respectful but until she knows how you feel this will continue.

I have actually decided not to put a number on how much I want to lose and what size I want to be. I guess the reason for this is because I have never been anything but big. I want to feel and be healthy and whatever size and shape that is I will be happy

Knee pain probably isn't new to most on here but I am starting to think that I won't make it through this process! I have my first surgions appointment on Wednesday but my surgery won't be until the summer, possibly. I was at a training last week that the only way to get around was stairs & walking to class about a mile away. Let alone I was on a plane for 6 hours just to get there & back. My knee pain is so bad that nothing is working to relieve it. Been to the doctor for shots but they only work for so long. I know that I need to workout & prove that I can lose weight before my surgery but I don't think I can do it. I know in the end things will get better but until then I hate being in this much pain & it effecting certain opportunities. Sorry about the rant but I just hate that I let myself get this far! Learning new lessons during this process!

Thanks guys. I used to do water aerobics when my knees actually worked. I'm gonna try & see if I can do it. It's getting in & out of the water that can be tricky. The reason I have to wait until the summer is because my insurance wants me to be smoke free for 6 months & I've only quit smoking about a month ago. I don't know if they'll let me do it sooner if my knees are a serious issue. I'm gonna talk with my surgeon about that. I just have to remember to move or they get real stiff. Thanks for the encouragment

I am wondering the same thing. I have been saying that I want to stay out for 4 weeks but then I think about it and know that maybe after 1-2 weeks I could go back to work. I sit at a desk most of the day and if something needs done that is heavy or anything I know that I have plenty of people to help. It will be interesting just how long I can stand being away from work and how I will feel then. Congrats on your date and I wish a speedy recovery

I'm a few days late with my entry but I have been very busy traveling. I traveled to visit my family this past weekend and it was a good visit. I did inform my parents that I was going to get the surgery and of course they are supportive. I think that they were surprised because I was so defensive when it was brought to my attention in past years. I told them I needed to soul search by myself and it was my decision and my decision alone. I still have my days that where don't think I can do it but I know that in the end I can do it. These next 10 days are going to be interesting because I am traveling for work. I am spending Thanksgiving with my friends in DC and taking this vacation is a must. Trying to eat the same as I do at home has been hard but I have made better decisions then in the past when traveling. I get into this mood where I try and rationalize that since I'm on vacation I can eat what I want. I think becasue of the past 3 or so months of me watching what I eat and the differences in choices has helped me now being out of the comfort of my home. This is a much needed vacation and I will still enjoy myself but I still need to watch what I eat and make better decisions. Now next week will be the test because of where I am for work.....it will be interesting but at the same time a leason in how to choose better food when there isn't much to choose from. I hope everyone has a joyful Thanksgiving....enjoy family & friends

Why am I this heavy? How could I have let myself get this far? Why even try when you know you’re going to fail again? I can’t tell you how many times I asked myself these questions this week. I thought last week was an emotional week…..boy was I wrong. I think it all started when I thought about the 7 hour flight I have to do in about a week. I have to travel to Washington, D.C. for work and knowing that it’s going to be a hard trip is scaring me. Trying to fit into a seat that is made for someone half my size and sitting next to a person who is eyeing you because you are spilling over into their seat makes me want to cry. Knowing that you can’t go to the bathroom because they were apparently made for a Barbie! I have avoided flying for the longest time but this trip seems to be the hardest thing to try and get out of. After a really long cry and kind of beating myself up I decided that getting an extra seat would be a better solution. This will be my first time purchasing two plane tickets just for me but I know that I will be comfortable and there will be less embarrassment if I bought it in advance. Boy what a wake-up call that was…..oh the joy of flying. I know that there will be a time when I do fit in one of those seats and not have to worry about the looks and whispers. So I haven’t told my family except my sister about the surgery and I just found out last week that my mom is going to do the surgery too. It was surprising to hear this but no really because my mother and father have always bothered me to get it too. So one emotion I was not ready for regarding my mother getting surgery was jealousy. I am not a jealous person but for some reason I am now. I think the reason I am is because she doesn’t have all the restrictions I do because of my surgeon and insurance. All she has to do is try and lose 15 pounds then she will be able to get her surgery before they leave for Hawaii in April. Now I have to be on a 6-month supervised diet, work with a nutritionist, have a psych evaluation, and even then it doesn’t mean my insurance will approve. A friend told me that my surgeons are more detailed because they really want you to succeed in this process. Don’t get me wrong I am proud of my mother for doing this but I am just not ready to share this process with anyone. I know that I will get over this and I hope it is soon. P.S. I did get a call from the surgeon’s office and I have my first appointment on December 5th. I am so excited and I also was assigned the surgeon that I wanted . Thankfully being in D.C. for 2 weeks will help me get to this date faster.

I have heard that it's a good way to get in your protein. Less sugar than most other drinks. A friend of mine who had the surgery said to take half of the container and mix it with regular soy milk. This way the sweetness is cut in half but I know that after surgery your taste buds might be different. I am switching to those after my current protein drink is done. I am trying to get in less sugar and more protein before my surgery next year. I'd say if you can handle the sweetness then you could do it once in a while.

You know maybe his comment is a sign that he wasn't the right person to be with during your new YOU. Congrats and I hope that only positive things happen from now on

Where to start.....well first off my name is Shanna (Shannalee) Smith and I am 34 years old. I live in Spokane Washington but grew up in the Seattle area. I have been heavy all my life so being "skinny" is really foreign for me. It has really taken me more than half of my life to make the decision to get wls but I think that asking for help is not a bad thing. I also believe that I needed to come to this decision on my own rather then everyone around me telling me to get the surgery. Denial is more like it but when you have the people around you telling you that wls is the way to go I just wanted to prove to everyone that I didn't need it. I guess even when I tried to lose the weight without help it still didn't work. With all the researching I have done on wls I found that it's merely a tool to help on lose weight and that you have to work on all the others parts along the way. One huge fear that I have at the moment is that whenever I lose weight I get scared and put the weight back on. I guess when one has been big all their life you get comfortable and being something else scares me. I guess what I really need is to experience a better and more healthier me to know what if does feel like to be "skinny". One thing that has helped me understand the process of wls is this website and everyone that is here. I know that while I'm getting all my tests and going through the pre-op diet, that everyone here will help me concur those ups and downs. Even after the surgery I know that when things hit a bump in the road that this is the place I can come to for help and advise. I guess this is the place to ask for help and with my history of not asking for help I know that I can break that cycle. This is only the beginning and it can only get better from here.

First off I had my seminar this week. It was nice meeting the surgery team. They are nice but also really funny. That’s a good sign because I love to laugh…who wouldn't I should be getting a phone call from my surgeon to set up an appointment this week. I’m excited and can’t wait for that phone call. Luckily I have another issue I’m taking care of (PCOS doctor appointments). Plus keeping busy with work has helped. Not sure how I’m going to handle 2-4 weeks away from work. One thing you should know is I love what I do and the people I work with. I know, it’s crazy but I do . One thing I didn't expect so soon was all the emotions I felt this week. I know that your emotions will be up and down but I didn't realize it would be this soon. During this week, around 2-3 days, I was feeling alone. I’m single at the moment and all my family lives 300 miles away. I go to doctor appointments alone, figure out meals alone, and feel pretty much alone. Some might say this is ideal for this process but I really have mixed feelings about that. It’s funny because I have felt alone before but not like this. Today has been a good day, actually yesterday was too. They say you need to take it one day at a time but I have come to the conclusion that I need to take it one hour at a time. Need to work myself up to that one day but until then I am good with taking it hour by hour. I’m so proud of myself thought because I have really started watching what I eat. Cutting out soda and sugar has been going good (even with Halloween I was good – no candy!). Trying to get in the protein and veggies but the carbs thing has been hard. I have to try because I want to get ready even though I am probably 6-9 months away from surgery…but this will be a large part of my success. One last thing (I promise), I bought the Weight Lose Surgery for Dummies book and I have got to say it was the best thing I could of done. There is so much info in there and I feel a little overwhelmed but a good overwhelmed. I have a feeling I will be caring this book around with me everywhere and know it will be my companion for a while. I do recommend this book to anyone who is starting or even close to surgery date. Well another week down and many more to go. Understanding this process is like a roller coaster ride….you will have ups and downs but in the end you will have a smile on your face and on your way to a healthier you.

I have been wanting this back piece for some time now but felt that I was too heavy to get it. I have 11 tattoos already and think I might have to have a few touched up once the weight comes off. I always choose a place that wouldn't be too affected if I did lose the weight. I don't think that I could handle one on my stomach....I barely lasted through my leg piece. I do think that memorializing your new you is a great idea. I do have one on my right inner ankle that I would love to cover with something and maybe once I reach my weight lose goal that might be something to look into. Some are a butterfly, a Celtic cross memorializing my brother, flowers, Chinese symbol meaning "inner strength" on my ankle, a heart over my heart, and even a rose bush with my niece name on my left leg......they all mean something so the one I get will mean a whole lot. I have a while and I know that something will draw my eye and I'll know that's the one for me to remember this journey.

I know that it can be frustrating and I'm right there with you. Waking up this morning I looked like I didn't have knees because they were locked and I was in pain. It seems that in this process to becoming healthier our patients level is tested. Remember to look at your handle name and know that you are wonderwomen and you can do this. We are all here for you and will be here long after you are healthy. The day will come when you wake up and there is no more pain. That you are able to walk longer distances and still have the energy to go even further. This time right now might feel like a million miles away but you will get there. Keep the faith and we all are with you during this time

You're not alone. I hurt my knees in February and they haven't healed because of my weight. I had shots and PT but in reality my weight has done me in. I try and workout but pain is all I get. However, I have found that being in the Water helps. I still hurt but I need to start something. Had my seminar last week and exercise seems to be key. I know I'll be in pain for a while but I try to remember why I'm doing this and know that in the end the pain will be no more. When you meet with your surgeon and nutritionist you'll figure out what will work. Sent from my Vortex using RNYTalk

I have been feeling a little sad and blue these past few days. I had my seminar last night and it went pretty well. Actually I kind of knew most of it but the particulars of what the surgeon and nutritionist expect was the only thing I didn't know. I have been trying to figure out why I have been so sad and down lately and I think it's because I sort of feel alone in this process. I know that I have you guys and a few close friends but there are others that I respect that I really want to talk with. I know that they will be supportive and I know that they will be my cheering squad but I just don't know. It might be a bit early to be talking about it but I don't want it to come off like I'm ashamed of have it or something. Like today I almost told a co-worker (we are also lunch buddies) about it because we were talking about how we have changed our eating habits. He is a runner and is really going through the same thing like no sugar, no caffine, etc. We both were surprised that it was so similar. His reason is because of his running but mine is because of the surgury. I feel like if I had told him today at lunch that he would be helpful when those "not so good days" come around and I need a boost. I just don't know....what do you all think? I know I really need to make the best decision for me but other people experiences, good or bad, is much appriciated.

This is awesome. Great information for a newbie like me.

Up until this point I have only told a handful of people that I have decided to get the surgery and the response has been supportive. Of course the questions keep coming but I still have questions myself. So on Friday I talked with my boss (I'm his executive assistant for 8 yrs) and told him (also his wife who works with us) about the surgery and the many months ahead. I knew that he was going to be supportive but the reaction I received blew me away. He is so happy and supportive. He even talked about the 6 people he knows that have had it and had great results. It's amazing how many people I have told that know someone that has gone through this process. We talked about everything and then he started talking about how frustrating he has seen me over the last year since I hurt my knees. He knows that I love the outdoors because I love hiking and walking....after all I live on a great trail along our river. I was almost in tears and that is really hard for someone to make me do. I did tell him that for right now I really want to keep it under wraps until I am a little more educated in the process and then he surprised me again. He said I didn't have to tell anyone, that this is something for me and no one else. The thing is I have worked with all these people for more than 10 years and I do want to tell them but when the time is right I will know. I know that there will be non-supportive people but they know where I stand with that and will get an ear full with any negativity that is thrown my way. I think I was in denial for so long that the support that I have received so far is shocking only because of the denial. Everyday my faith in the decision to do the surgery has increased and I feel it'll get strong as the months go by

That is awesome! I am on the same track as you....started Chantix 3 weeks ago and haven't smoked most of those 3 weeks. I was worried about the side effects but so far they haven't shown. My insurance requires me to be smoke free for 6 months which is perfect. I can work physically and mentally towards the surgery. I could do the e-cig but I don't want to be reminded of them and I really want to do follow exactly what the docs tell me. Congrats on the surgery date

Ya I've seen a few myself but not bothered by it. However, when I think about it being done to me I get a little freaked out

I plan on taking 4 weeks but depending on what my surgeon thinks it could be longer. I am lucky though because my work is very supportive they are willing to let me stay out as long as I need. I think I might drive myself crazy staying home longer than 4 weeks but I want to make sure I am healed and ready.

I have to do the same thing and attend a seminar before I meet the surgeon. The seminar for me is Thursday and I feel this will be the first day of my journey even though I have been preparing for months. I agree with joyaskins34 and that the seminars are very helpful and will have great resources for me down the road.

I am so sorry this has happened to you. I only started this process in the last few months and I have many months to go. I know that there will be negative responses to a life time change like this but you have to keep this in mind....you are getting healthy for you and not them. You want to make sure that you are around a long time for your family. It's true that you do learn who is your true friends during this process. So far I have had great responses but I am just in the beginning so I know that there will be negative ones too. You are strong and will get past this....your co-worker has a chip on her shoulder and her negativity will show in this. I am so excited for you. You will be in my prayers and thoughts during this time