Hi All!
I'm Cathryn and I'm having the vertical sleeve surgery on Halloween Day! I keep thinking how brilliant having this done, this time of year is. So much of the holiday season is centered around eating yummy foods with the family and this will be a real test of my self control. I'm doing Thanksgiving this year and fully intend on filling the table with healthier versions of our favorites. I'm nervous about the surgery which I know is only natural. I trust my Surgeon immensely and know he'll keep me breathing. It's just the idea of it. Being under anesthesia freaks me out. But, I've come this far and beyond the anxiety is a Woman who is bursting at the seams with excitement. To feel at home in my own skin, to buy clothing that I actually like, to be a great role model for my girl, all of these things, life changing!
I find myself being far more mindful of late, very emotionally in tuned. Almost, spiritual. My somewhat daily walks at the beach, not only make my muscles feel loose but help me to clear my head and breath deeply. I love the concept of being aware of one's breathing. A tool brought forth in our Mindful Eating classes at Kaiser. For a very long time, I saw myself as simply a Mom and a Wife, losing my own identity in the process. I know exactly why I've gained this weight and in gaining that knowledge I can continue to work on new ways to fill the voids with things other than food. I find myself in my leisure reading more. It's a love of mine. Music fills my life in almost every aspect. I look forward to being out and about more. Going to concerts, plays, the theater. Being able to walk longer distances, travel. Be rid of the worries that being overweight can create.
In this mindfulness I am finding that my overall view of myself is improving. So much of my self-esteem was centered around my outward appearance. As much as I hate to admit it I was really down on myself throughout the years and have wasted so much of my life being unhappy and feeling unattractive. I'm looking forward and feel incredibly lucky to have this tool, the surgery, to assist me in becoming an improved version of myself. Good luck to you all and I'll enjoy reading everyone's stories and updates.