wdrake_98

Congrats. That's awesome.

On my goodness Fitjen, you have great strength. What a coward to leave you at this time in your life! Guess he forgot the vow, "in sickness". Prayers for you as your recover!

i had a band to sleeve conversion, so I think I have an extra incision that sleeves only won't have. It's about 2 inches and is the source of most of my pain. Makes using my ab muscles difficult. I started eating full liquids on yesterday, having grits, and a Popsicle. The grits really had me full. The grits kept me full most the night for the first time since the surgery. I woke about 5 am from hunger and again at 6:30, as I tried eating a yogurt instead of the grits. Tonight ill def have the grits to try a get thought the night. I am scheduled to go into work tomorrow but will be calling in sick, as I need one for day to get back into the swing of things So far I'm down to 212 from 221 since the surgery. Guess its normal, for the recovery process. I look forward to getting to mush foods to increase my calorie intake a bit.

So today is the day for my band to sleeve conversion. In pre op and getting all poked and questioned. 117/90 is my blood pressure. Guess I'm kinda nervous. Should be done in a few hours. I hope I'll be able to get back on and post updates after I get out of recovery.

Hey there. How's the recovery coming along?

This is a great post. I've been very concerned about losing too much weight too quickly as I want to keep my curves and don't want loose skin either. I look forward to eating like normal people lol. So do you have any issues with any food types?

Wow, I precisely measured out my 1 oz cup of grits, very excited about having my first non liquid food since the surgery. Figured I'd get at least 1/2 way done, but was taking it very very slowly. Even found a very tiny spoon to eat with. 4 bites later and I'm full, really fully. I've been trying to be cautious of getting overly full as it causes my left shoulder to have this very sharp pain. Now...about 4 hours since my first post, I'm still full...whooooooohooooo!!!! This is the longest I've been full since coming home. I wonder how long it will last.

Good grief. My stomach is like a new born baby. It goes from being fine and sleep. To a raging roar, screaming FEED ME NOW! The pain is intense and wakes me if I'm sleeping. Having 1 oz of grits to try and quite this baby lol

There is regular and zero. Zero has 6 carbs.

Natural way my large A$$, geez that strikes a nerve with me. Every time my husband would say that, all conversations would just stop. Ugh. Just so annoying for someone to speak on how easy something is, when they aren't living with the problem. While in preop I was visited by a male nurse who also had the sleeve. He was so reassuring. His wife got the surgery before him, and I think a few months later he did too. He lost over 100 lb already. I know I don't have that much to lose, but that's now...in 4 years after a few kids, who knows how large I would be. I dont argue with stupidity or arrogance. There is no point. I value the opinion of someone who's experienced the problem over someone who's talking in theory. .

Diamond.... If that's your real name, remember its meaning. Diamonds are strong, the only thing that can cut a diamond, is a diamond. You are strong. You had 5 children, that's proof enough. I see your pain, as I've been in a similar situation of not being wanted by the man I loved. But you have to find a way to love yourself and your children first. You are coming here for support, and everyone is telling you to think about YOURSELF not about him and your responses keep going back to how you feel about him, him, him. Lets talk about you. You don't need him to go to counseling with you, you go by yourself. You will learn more about yourself then you ever thought you knew. Most counseling I've ever attended, works from the perspective of each person taking responsibility and fixing his/her actions. Not finger pointing or trying to force a person to do something he is not ready to do. So start by fixing you. Do what's right for you.

Hey there.... You are far from alone in how you feel and how your husband is acting. View my profile and my posts and you will find similar stories of emotional wives and seemingly withdrawn husbands. Personally, my husband has done a 180 in his response to this decision since the surgery. I drove myself to the hospital to get the surgery, but once he realized I was ok, he's been overly caring for me. I'm not saying that same will happen to you as I don't know your husband. But what I am trying to say, is don't let his reaction to the surgery be the reason you two breakup. If your heart is set on it, and you know your body, then stick to your feelings. I do recommend relationship counseling. My hubby and I have just started seeing one.

It went well. I have a thread about it in the share your stories section.

Surgery went very well. The heated conversations with my disapproving husband surely made things much more stressful then they needed to be. However I know he loves me deeply and was just very concerned about me getting though the surgery. I arrived on time to the hospital and went straight to pre op. The hospital staff was very good. I was ready promptly for my 8 am surgery. Dr. was a few minutes late, but showed up and was ready to go. I used the restroom so I wouldn't have to get a catheter. Once back in bed, I was pushed to the operating room, moved over to the surgery bed, told to breath into this mask....next thing I know I'm waking up. Nurses were very concerned about my pain level. I got a morpheme control and used it quite liberally lol. But eventually the morpheme became too much. I couldn't keep my eyes open. The nurses kept coming in asking me if I wanted to walk. I wanted to, but I just couldn't even keep my eyes open. I stopped using the morpheme and my dr. eventually approved a different pain medicine, that had to be injected directly. The injections were painful, but I didn't feel completely sleepy. Hubby arrived around 1 to check in on me and left shortly after, as I was still high from all the morpheme and was sleep. Slept and walked until I was released the next day. Coming home has been nice. Hubby's been annoying supportive. Even wrote out an hourly schedule for everything I'm suppose to do. Eat, walk, meds. Gotta love it. Two days sine the surgery and I'm feeling good. Trying to figure out my stomach pains. What's hungry vs. gas vs. fullness. This decision has been personal, and only 3 family members know. I'm still moving very slowly around the house and worry about returning to work in Monday without giving my secret away.

Wow. This thread is really helping me realize that my husbands reaction to this is kinda, typical. The behavior pattern is the same as most of you that have posted here. Last night, in a final hail merry attempt we saw a marriage counselor. The counselor eventually said that we have deep relationship issues and the surgery has exasperated the problems we have. He then asked to postpone the surgery for 30 days so he could have a chance to help us work out our issues and come to a resolve about the surgery. The fact that I'm not postponing the surgery, against the recommendations of the counselor is not sitting well with my husband. It was like pulling teeth to even get him to sleep in the bed with me last night, he actually wanted to sleep on the sofa. He keeps trying to make this decision about me being the shellfish one and not making a decision for US. I think thought that he's making it about him, cause he's impacted by the decision. Well at the end of the day, year, decade...this decision EFFECTS me. So, it is about me. Not us...me. Yes it will impact him and out marriage, hopefully in a good way, but I can't weight that impact higher then the effect being overweight has on me and my life. I'm looking forward to continuing the counseling as we both need it. The counselor told my husband that my love tank was empty. I don't think that he completely understands what it means yet. So I sit in the hospital bed, all alone, actually praying that he's able to sleep right now, and that when he wakes I'll be finished and in recovery. Hoping for the best, for all you ladies, my surgery, my husband, and our marriage.

Don't over think things. They have to be detailed and make sure everything is checked and covered. Best to have the double check to make sure things will be ok. I know not knowing can be frustrating. Just try and focus on other things.

So I'm scheduled for Oct 31 for my band to sleeve conversion. Timing and pricing is so perfect for everything, but my hubby is not on board with the surgery at all. I was trying to be understanding to his concerns, and prove to him that risks of the surgery are worth the potential weight loss for me. I know he loves me, and has a hard time communicating his feelings at times, so I'm seeing his actions as just being a man. I think he's worried, he'll be a widow. I need his support. I don't want to do this without his support. Even if he doesn't agree, I still feel like he should still be there to support me. In an effort to passively bring up the fact that I'm getting the surgery, I told him that being a parent, is about loving your child, warning them about risks, hoping for the best, saying I told you so when you're right, but most importantly, always being there when they fall. He was so mad he didn't even want to talk about it tonight. Time is ticking. I just hope he comes around and doesn't make this about him and allows me to do this for me because I need and want to be healthy.

great information here!

As my date is approaching, the stress is building in both of us. Another heated debate last night. He says I haven't done enough to make him feel comfortable about the procedure. Yet, then goes on to say things about the procedure that are just not true. Things he should have read in the literature I gave him. So either he's not reading it, or he's reading it with a biased mind. I don't know how to deal with either. I've been such an independent woman my entire life, dealing with the shame and rejection of being overweight. And now, just because I'm married, I'm suppose to plead, beg and comfort him? Very frustrating.

Congrats! Way to go!

Congrats on your surgery. Glad everything went well. What kind of soup did you have?

I just read my pre op package and it included a section on the emotional issues that many patients have experienced after the sleeve. The last topic was divorce, and said that many patients end of getting divorced. Scary.