Nicolanz

I personally can't wait for the day that my weightloss is not the topic of discussion anymore! Oh man can I relate to the struggle of balance and the guilt of being selfish. I'm struggling to be a good employee, student, mother, and wife on top of being healthy. There's just not enough hours in the day! Even though everything I'm doing is for my family, I feel like I'm neglecting them in the meantime. Ugh!

I've had a great upbringing with a wonderful big family. I never understood how one could cut ties with family until I met my husband. If y'all have ever read Angela's Ashes, that is my husband's upbringing but in a modern day American suburb. He struggled as an adult with the guilt of cutting all ties. He was the only one out of his parents and four siblings that would attempt to keep the family together. After disappointment after another, I was the one who encouraged him to cut ties. Sometimes it's necessary and IT IS ok. Leaving them behind has brought peace into his life.

I was sleeved in November of last year and on my Christmas list was appetizer plates, small forks and spoons, a food scale, a fitness tracker, a bento lunch box, and a large water bottle haha! All have been invaluable to me to this day. Also if you don't already have a good jacket or coat......the smaller you get, the colder you get! Brrrrr! Merry Christmas and good luck with surgery!

Yes periods suck BUT this is a first sign of good health! Congratulations!!!!

Yesterday I went to pick out some scrubs for school. I picked up an XL shirt and pants. I asked the clerk if I could try them on and she laughs at me saying no way will those fit me. She grabs mediums and hands them to me. I give her the look of death wanting to punch her right in the face! I take them, fearing the humiliation I've dealt with my entire life of something not fitting. They fit! I now want to make out with her right then and there! I obviously still see myself as obese and it stinks that I don't see myself the way others do! Hopefully one day....

Oooh and I beat my personal best today by doing a 12 minute mile and I'm .6% away from having an acceptable body fat percentage! Today is a good day!

I honestly thought physical hunger was my issue. Im never full....I'm always hungry. ....I have a huge stomach/ appetite up until 4 months ago when the novelty of the sleeve wore off, I found myself having mini binges and eating when not hungry again. All of my past demons are coming back. I eat until I'm in pain. I then realized it's far more than physical hunger. It's embarrassing really. I'm back at square one trying to figure out WHY?!?! The realization has helped me tremendously though. I'm not in denial anymore. I'm not hiding behind excuses anymore. I'm not by any means "cured" but I know what to work on now. I'm taking responsibility, damnit!

Double post

I was praying someone didn't downplay someone's feelings. RJ don't apologize, it was very brave of you (and everyone else) to open up. We all appreciate it. You all have my love and support whether you want it or not!

Oh, I thought I overlooked a post or something. Looks like we're all confused! Group hug.....bring it in guys.....no? Ok.....

I'm confused. Why is everyone apologizing?

Look up Brene Brown's lecture on vulnerability. She really opened up my eyes and heart to life and being present in it.

I agree with Rev. Laura, you are more in tune with the meaning of all of this I believe. You are in no way more fucked up than anyone, you are just one of the few that are bringing the darkness into the light. I personally think that's what will make you successful in the long run. Not only that but you are helping others along the way. You admit you don't know it all but you open up the conversation to important issues. That's what I and many others admire about you. Your threads have hundreds of responses from people who have similar issues.

Amy!!!! You look amazing! Congratulations!

As much as I love my mother.....she contributed to my food issues as well. She was opposite of yours, though. She would make me feel like a complete low life fat ass if I went for a second helping or was hungry between mealtimes. She made me feel guilty which led to binge eating and eating secretly in shame. She didn't know how to express her concern. I understand though. I struggle with my own son who doesn't care about food and is so picky I have to stop myself from forcing food on him. I don't want him to have an unhealthy relationship with food. Sometimes we stress so much about doing right by our kids we cause more damage.

You betta believe I had my 2 oz of dark meat! Baha!

I feel the exact same way! I've never recommended this surgery to anyone for the fear they would have complications. Especially since I went to Mexico, I feel very blessed that I made it out with no complications. I look back and think, that was crazy! I'm in no way saying it was a bad idea, just that I'd feel terrible if someone wasn't as lucky as I was. I get what you're feeling.

I'm in Katy, Tx! Well, close enough.

Girl, no judging here! The only reason I didn't make stuffing is because I'm the only one who likes it and it would have been the only thing I'd eat for the next 3 weeks probably! I love it!

Aww thank you! You made my day!

Wow!!!!!! What a blessing! Congratulations!

Thanksgiving was a success! I ate what I said I was going to eat but no room for pumpkin pie. Maybe I'll have a taste today!

Man! I'm jealous of where you live, Laura! Here's me chowin on a brussel sprout haha! [ATTACH]37844[/ATTACH]

Like this but I toss the cooked sprouts with caramelized onions and bacon or pancetta.

I personally think gumbo is one of the best things ever created!