TakeCareGirl

I thought I should write a follow-up not only for those who are reading this but for continuity when I reflect back on this journey.
 
Today I walked into a meeting with a physician who knew nothing about me, nothing about my choices and why I have made the choices I have and why this is the road I am taking. It was not a meeting I was looking forward to. But I took the position that I have a strong belief in which is, "Knowledge is Power". I had the knowledge so I had all the power. The dr. walked in and I made sure I was open pleasant and not defensive and open to what he had to say. He started off trying to talk to me about the bad choices I had made in my life (and yes those were his words). I didn't flinch I let him finish and then I went to town. I basically took this man to school (in a good way lol). My first question was if he was aware of the procedure I was wanting and if he had any experience with patient who wanted them. He said he knew of this "experimental" procedure and its risks. Well I knew right there by his answer he had no idea. So we talked for the better part of an hour and you know what, he had no idea what the sleeve was he thought it was a the DS Switch. After we talked he took my hand and told me that he wished that every patient he saw was as sure of what they wanted and needed in their life, and he said he would do whatever he could to help me succeed. WOW, I was blown away. From frenemy to friends just like that!
 
Yet again another example that most of those opposed to us are just lacking the information that we already have. One step closer and I ready for every one of them, bring 'em on.

Happpy Birrrthhddaayyyy to meeeee! The greatest present I could have ever given myself? VSG. Period. End of story. I paid out of pocket and went broke for this surgery, and my only regret is that I didn't do this sooner. I've never in my life experienced this kind of weight loss success, the little bit I did came from extreme dieting, deprevation, and I dare say an eating disorder. Nothing ever lasted. I might get excited at a few Weight Watchers meetings than, bam, it would come right back on with in a month or a couple of weeks. I use to be relieved to lose just a few pounds over the course of a month, today I'm now down over -40 lbs since surgery 12 weeks ago. This week I lost an addition -2lbs and yesterday I celebrated my 29th birthday. Normally this event has me plotting out my food plan of attack 2 weeks in advance. I would eat anything and everything and use my birthday as an excuse to binge. This year I did not, and could not. Old habits are hard to break, I even picked up a couple of my favorite go to items, and low and behold my sleeve wasn't having any of it. I felt foolish for even trying.
 
I found a dress (a business bodycon style dress) in my closet that I bought over 2 years ago online. I was overweight but I figured if I lost 20 lbs it might fit and I was in love with the style. When it arrived in the mail I was so deeepresssseeeeddd to learn that even if I lost 20 lbs that dress was NOT going to fit. I felt bad and humiliated as usual, but instead of returning it as I should have, I hung it up, tags still attached and moved it to the back of my closet... because maybe, just maybe one day something magical might happen. Last week I rediscovered it and almost gasped. Could it be?? The dress?! But have I lost enough???? Well, I put it on and bam... it fit. Like a glove. It only took -40lbs! But it fits!
 
I wore it for the first time yesterday on my birthday, then wore it watch Maya Angelou lecture on women in leadership, then proceeded to a dinner date. It wasn't a huge blow out birthday, but it was GREAT. And I felt GREAT. And I felt beautiful. I haven't been able to say that in a long time. I felt beautiful. Today I took the day off from work, and spent have the day at a spa getting a massage and facial, and the other half of the day completely gutting my closet. I literally cleared out HALF of my clothes that are too big for me. My room is a disaster, but I knew that these items had to go. I finished up with a late lunch with my exboyfriend who has been randomly appearing a lot more lately (giggles). Tonight is my birthday party with friends, followed by a going away party for another friend tomorrow night. I'm about to see a whole lot of people I haven't seen in a while and I know there will be LOTS to be said!
 
Birthdays use to be about food, and celebrating with food. This birthday was about celebrating me, and I went a totally different direction. I definitly see more birthdays with Spa Day's involved including a new special birthday outfit. Here's to new beginnings, new bodies, and new traditions. Cheers!
 
Height: 5'9
 
Highest (Surgery) Weight: 216
 
1st Primary Goal Weight: 169
2nd Optimal Goal Weight: 145
 
Sleeve Journey:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 8/17/12- PreOp/Surgery Day w/Pics Posted in Blog
Week 1 (8/24): 204.8 (-11.2)
Week 2 (8/31): 200.6 (-4.2)
Week 3 (9/7): 196.8 (-3.8)
Week 4 (9/14): 193.5 (-3.3)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 9/17/12- 1 Month Anniversary w/Pics Posted in Blog
Week 5 (9/21): 191.6 (-1.9)
Week 6 (9/28): 190.1 (-1.5)
Week 7 (10/5): 187.0 (-3.1)
Week 8 (10/12): 181.9 (-5.1)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 10/17/12- 2 Month Anniversary w/Pics Posted in Blog
Week 9 (10/19): 181.4 (-.5)
Week 10 (10/26): 177.9 (-3.5)
Week 11 (11/02): 176.8 (-1.1)
Week 12 (11/09): 174.7 (-2.1)

It has been awhile since I last posted. It has been 2 months since I have had my surgery and I have lost a total of 44 pounds. I feel great except for the bronchitis I have now. I have enjoyed some halloween candy and had a piece of wedding cake at my sister's wedding I enjoyed both. I no longer like bread all that much or my former favorite pizza. My new favorite treat is greek peach yogurt with walnuts or pecans. I swim often and will be leaving shortly to swim some laps. I am really grateful that my weight loss has been steady and constant. I always lose at least a pound a week if not more. I eat when I am hungry and it is very easy to stop when I am full. I am grateful that being obsessed with food seems to be over. I have more time to obsess over facebook, reading, swimming and music. Life is really good except for the bronchitis and finances but other than that everything is wonderful.

I'm sitting here, working in my home office, dressed in jeans and a soft, thin, brushed red sweater. Why is that such a big deal? Well, because the jeans are size 16 and the sweater is from American Eagle, size XL. These are normal sized clothes and they aren't binding or pinching or look gross. I look normal.
 
I'm still 200+ pounds and have more to lose than I have thus far, but this is just so awesome. This is the first time in 15+ years I've worn normal clothes and felt so comfortable.
 
I love my sleeve. I love my surgeon...........and I love my hubby most of all, because thru thin, emaciatedly thin, thick, thicker and thickest this man has loved me for me. When I was so uncomfortable in my own skin, when I was a younger me, angry with myself for what I felt I had done to myself..........this man loved me. And I sit here now, happy as can be, sipping tea, wearing jeans with a soft red sweater...............enjoying the little things...........and the littler me.