RJ'S/beginning

I know for sure that if you don't say that you are a food addict out loud or to yourself..you will never deal with it enough to make a huge difference in your life.....Sure an alcoholic does not have to worry about a beer being placed in front of him like we do food...that makes it even more work for us to be able to make choices, the right choices for our future selves....that said..We will slip because we face food every day and we are not perfect..not at all..It is getting back up and riding that horse after the fall that..The first year is all the learning curves and what do I do here and what do I do there..And just when you got it figured out...bang....another issue..There are no bed of roses here..work work and more work.....forever from the start to the end! I bought the book and looking forward to reading it as well...Have ordered a few books off here as recommended by users....

I think I will order that book myself..Thanks for the tip... I really believe that fighting the demon of food addiction will be a life long struggle. That we can never let our guard down over it..It will creep up on us periodically..and we will have to face it with our brains to fix each little facet of it......Life long struggle I think as this has been a life long problem for us to live with..... Like once an alcoholic always an alcoholic you know!

I have been told that up to 6 months it is a possibility....mine I was sleeved on Nov. 6th 2012 and on Nov.12th I was rushed to the hospital with a major leak leak that went septic....After I was rushed into surgery I was put into an induced coma and was there for 19 days..After that 13 surgeries followed and rehab..Which included me learning to walk again, talk again, eat again, write again and just about every thing else...I lost my singing voice and I have a numbness in my hand as a result of what I went through... I got a category 5 bed sore and had to have medical attention for that up until a couple months ago..i now face pneumonia..and dislocated 3 ribs due to 5 months in bed in the hospital... I didn't eat for 5 1/2 months and the complications are still rearing their ugly heads...I face a new surgery soon, as now I am having trouble with my insides ( girl parts )..It never ends..... Over view of what I have been dealing with......Down 182 lbs though..That's the good news!!!!!!

I have tried to message you but can't seem to get it..They keep sending it to another all lower case letters!

I concur...This won't happen though..She said this when I was 30 lbs heavier then I am now too!!!!!!!!!!

I always got...you have a pretty face..And then in my head I would say..to bad about the body eh..But felt I had no right to respond.....

LOL..You made me laugh!!!!! Skim milk eh!!! I wonder if we could just bathe in it......would that help? No just kidding...If it works....that would be amazing!

Exactly GG

Personally I think you were craving them and probably for a good reason..Your body needed the Iron, and Fiber, and whatever Vitamins there in.... Try to add some veggies in there as a regular part of your diet....they are good for you too..... This is a personal opinion......Always go with your surgeons recommendations first and foremost!

Thanks for the info..Will send it on!

I showed my hubby the thread last night and said look no one seems to understand why you go after my food like a starving animal......His response....come on guys I'm working on it..And then he threw his head back and laughed!!!!!!!!!! Yup he took it hard folks!

Interesting. Do you think that's his way of food policing ? Nope, I think that he looks at it as seconds without effort....He has always been very careful to make sure the kids had enough to eat..He would leave a piece of steak a lone just in case my 6'8" son might need it....It is a new thing for him to see food like this... I think that he feels that I am not going to eat it anyway so get it while it's hot sorta thinking.....He has asked me to order normal portions and take the rest home for his lunch the next day...Well that has only happened a few times....

What I am working on right now is learning to like myself as I go through each and every step of this journey...To say to myself this was a good thing to do and I will be much more active and healthier for it.... Also learning to forgive myself for allowing things to get so bad that I had to reach out for emergency help... To be grateful for the wonderful miracle of WLS for those of us that have exhausted all other avenues...And count success not only by the scale but by the personal growth I have made within my self during this experience.... Each change we make makes us stronger in our resolve to go forward...To continuously check the brain and what it is trying to do to cause me to take risks and not follow through with exploring the real issues that got me to this place in my life.... These things are what I want to become habits so that I can stop going back and forth, and up and down over the same self destructive thinking.... I want to feel like I got this...Working on that one as well....

I can add to this thread by saying that no matter how prepared you are or think you are you will come across situations and feelings and thoughts that you never thought possible...all the things that you hoped would be accomplished with this tool will cause you frustration and anxiety, happiness and fear...fear of both succeeding and failing..Fear of who you were and who you will become..etc... The best thing to do at the beginning is stay close to your surgeon and nuts program and ask as many questions as you can on here or anyone you trust....( Those who have been where you are! ) Which is most of us here... This is not a simple calorie counting diet. This is a program that will be with you the rest of your life...If you commit to it most likely you will be happier, healthier and the person that you hid inside will come out and shine..... It will be worth all the struggles and if you are one of the fortunate ones you will see your goal..That is where the work begins...... I can't think of anything I personally have done in my life that has taken this much time, effort and energy to accomplish..I am still not there, and will never be there..I am a work in progress like a painting ( one stroke at a time ) Is it worth it? Well yes!!!!!!!!!

I ate totally clean today....feel like a fresh start for this program of life......hehehehe

gmanbat..I don't think they make hamburgers that look like the one I tore apart today....100 % pure beef, no fillers, the only thing missing was a fresh piece of tomato.... You should have seen him eating his lunch ( fish chowder ) and reaching over at the same time eating fries by the handful...I wasn't going to eat them anyway but come on.............I asked him if he was starving and he said yup!!!!!!!!! I said don't forget the cold slaw and he said no..I think I have had enough thanks.....tooooooooo much! Case closed....I will never win this one!

yup feelin pretty fly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!lol

My hubby reached over the table today at lunch and took half my burger..lean and mean...Ate all the french fries and then asked if I were done.....I told him that if I hadn't been he would have gotten a fork in the hand.... I have tried everything to stop him from doing that until I am done....Maybe even the threat of violence won't work..I don't know..... I try so hard not to react!!!!!! A lot of times he says oh you weren't done with that eh? I just look at him as he continues to stuff whatever in his mouth....whatever I guess!!!!!!!!!!

I think your amazing to tell us how you are dealing with things...the fact that you are going to reflect is also amazing.....you have a good hold of the change you see you need to make.....see how you can learn from these little threads....Good luck with your new desire to change!!!!!

Thanks everyone....went today and got some size 14 jeans...2 weeks ago I bought size 16 was so excited then...almost in the 14's... It is hard for me to fathom that I had 182 lbs. on my back for so many years..My legs were strong..but my back gave out...... Sure gives me a boost to get going again and get the rest done and out of the way.....yip pee!!!!!!!!

Onederland is when you finally make it to the 100's and something....like 199.9 is onederland!

Hell no GG, in between all those veggies was chocolate and fruit cake and the like.......Not bragging or making an excuse..I think it is just dam hard work that keeps the weight going down.....not to mention my little tiny tummy!!!!!

I understand the food police part..I have had this issue since I was sleeved over a year ago...The worst one is oh I thought you would not have been able to eat that much..Or you did good honey, you ate most of it...Decide am I eating too much or not enough... I have now warned him that if he comments on my food intake I may quite possibly break his nose..This is a man who can chow down anything at any time and maybe lose weight as he is one of those people.. I know his heart is in the right place...i just need him to put it somewhere else.......So I get it!!! I have resorted to the prospect of violence if he does not stop monitoring my food...lol

I just got a like from a fellow sleever on one of my earlier posts I made early in 2012....I went back to read it myself and wow....The confidence and resolve I had at the time was unbelievable! I was not going to take any prisoners you know....Had a mind set of WLS and was going forward to the completion of a new and improved me....All the struggles I have had over the years of being obese and being laughed at and looked at and made to feel like I was not worth the dirt below peoples feet.. Brought me to this place in my life... I knew that I was on a downward spiral and also knew that I was headed for a wheel chair or death...i could barely function due to a fall I had a few years before...I was in a desperate place and needed assistance so badly...I was on my way and there was no stopping me. Sorta like a freight train out of control...In my mind I felt that no matter what I would conform to the "normal". I made sure that only a few knew what I decided to do and they were all supportive....And off I went to do what I so desperately needed done...I was so excited and could not wait to start my new journey..With the wait and see the new me world and **** you! As some of you know it did not happen that way!!!!! Fast forward a year and the new me is not the person I had hoped she would be...She is still scared and hurting and working continuously to over come all the set backs I have had over the last year.... My entire world turned upside down and everyone that I thought were my true friends abandoned me and my family. No one was the same right down to the medical personal that I was going to on a regular basis before the surgery...It was as if everyone became strangers and no longer knew me....I was thrown into some kind of warp..And to this day do not understand how I got here.... I am alone in this as there is no one in my area that has come forward to talk to me about all of what they have experienced and maybe we could have encouraged each other I don't know...It's possible that they don't want anyone to know either so I am on my own here... I really am having trouble dealing with the "new me" and all that it has dished out...I cry at the drop of a hat mourning my old life with friends..I did not know any better back then that they were not real....It was truly like I had died a slow and painful death...One that i am reminded of daily as I struggle with the new complications that came from my decision a year ago.... I will never truly understand all the things that has happened over the year as it was out of my control...and I don't think I will ever get a real handle on WLS as well...There are to many facets to it to be able to fix it all...Hence a life long change... I am grateful for this forum even though sometimes I zig when I should zag and get attitude.....It has been a forum for me to express my long and difficult journey and changes in my world... Yes I am smaller, yes I can do much more...Have I gone out and searched for a new life?..Nope! Can't trust it yet. Will I ever get over all that has happened to me? Don't know! I want to thank everyone that has followed my experience and have been so positive and encouraging to me... I am glad I did it and would experience it all again for the trade. But I had no idea that this would totally throw my life into chaos and make me a completely different person...That I will never be the same that truly, undeniably the past me did die when I had the complications of WLS Thank you for hearing me out... How has your life changed? Please share with me!!!!!!!

Thank you, I hope you are right!