RJ'S/beginning

WE all hit the lowest point before we start to climb up again. All the best in your journey. Your gonna do great!

Hi; I know exactly how you are feeling. No one really knows unless they go through it all. They can show compassion but they don't know really! We are groomed to think that it is going to be a piece of cake ( sorry ) And to a lot it is. But some of us like you like me and some others on here and people I have had experience with have to see things in a different way. We have to look at everything moment to moment. Day to day, week to week and believe and trust the team that got us this far. Talking to those who have had complications is a way to see that you are not alone. I am out almost 2 years outand still suffer from complications. But I take it one thing at a time. I also concentrate on why I did this and like you said you were healthy. I was too sorta. But I knew it would not be long before I was not. When the complications started I was unaware of anything much until I came out of a 19 day coma. Then the battle really began. Each day I feel a little different and a little better. Each day I do not second guess why I did this because I already knew why I did this. ( To live a better healthier life style and be around for my grand daughter It did not go the way I dreamed it would and although the surgeon made me say I could die from this surgery I really did not believe it. Hind sight is 20/20 for us all. My advice to you if I can give it is to not look at the big picture. Handle it one day at a time. Write down the reasons you chose to do this for you and your family and mark all the changes good that happen to you as you travel this rocky road to fitness and health. This Wed. I have yet another scope and they want to see if my abscess is healed over from the ulcer and leak I got at 18 months out. Here is hoping for good news. The million dollar question is whether I would do this again and the answer is yes!!!!!!!!! My life has changes for the better even with all the complications. I can go anywhere. Do anything. Walk for hours and stand for ever. I can sit in a plane seat and don't have to use the big wheel chair at the hospital. i can bend down and tie my own shoes and hold my grand daughter so tight to me that she says I squeeze her too tight....I love it. I would not trade it for anything. Saying that does not help the moment you are in right now. Right now you are frightened and scared and worried for you and for your loved ones. I understand that all to well. But I want you to know that this is going to make you a different person. Not only in health but also personally it will change you and make you a more tolerant and caring person. You will reach out to others and help them understand that you had to do this no matter the cost. You have not lost your life over it. Others have you know. That does not make it easier but it does help. You see that you are still alive and closer to the goals you set for yourself. You must be your own champion and do research on what they are going to do next. Ask questions, hundreds of them if you need to until you feel safer. You will get better and this will pass. But you must calm yourself and let it happen so that you can feel the differences as they happen. Cry if you must but you have to pick your attitude back up. Way up as that is 50 percent of the chance of improvement. If you need to talk to me. PM me and we can make arrangements. I have done this before for other people on this forum. I am not saying I have all the answers but I know where you are and where you are coming from. We can talk whenever you want. Jane hug your fiance tight and tell him this is going to be a bumpy ride but worth it okay!

Signed up for that.Thanks Alex!

When they put you under they put a hose down your throat to help you breath. Most likely the cough is from that. When it happens take a sip of Water okay! The bleeding on the incision. I would have them look at that at least before you leave the hospital. Check for a temperature and if you have one it could be a start of a cold. I don't know for sure since I am not a Dr. But I do know that after they take the tube out most people get a tickle irritated cough!

What is the point of worrying about any of it now. It is a done deal. what ever comes or doesn't you will deal. Meanwhile, stay on the program your team has set out for you and then if something happens deal! There is no other option but to deal with everything that comes our way. One step at a time!

right now. The sleeve is swollen and so whatever you put in there even Water will cause you to burp. Be happy that it is happening because you don't want the pain that usually would follow a hard to burp episode. Make sure that you are sipping slowly for now and even if you do burp. That's normal! Bringing it all back up would be the issue......

I think it is because they all work in the medical field and my daughter works with these people on a professional level. she has dealt with WLS patients who have gone that way and she knows what I have gone through to get here. She is worried that I won't be able to stop. I think I have stopped. But I am not trying to high jack this thread. I just know that it is difficult to be reasonable at times. They see us differently then we see ourselves. I know I prefer it when my hubby has some meat on him and not when he gets too thin because of troubles we face and then he loses and becomes too thin. So I kinda understand where they are coming from. I really worry more myself about gaining it all back then getting too thin.... True dat!

It could be scar tissue forming or a small infection starting. Best to have it checked out to be sure. Okay!

I am dealing with the same issues at the moment. Ideal weight. What does that even mean to people like us who have struggled with the weight issue most of our lives. I have been told lately that I need to get a grip and realize how thin I am. Well they actually used the word tiny. ME TINY..say what! My team is happy I am under 200 lbs and now that I am in the maintenance stage people talk down to me if I flip a box over to see the caloric numbers. They are telling me to just stop it right now or I may find myself on the other end of the spectrum under doctors care for a eating disorder. Now that plastics are coming up my fear of everything going wrong is causing great anxiety and fear. I know when that happens I will be 20 lbs smaller then I want to be. That scares me because right now bones stick out everywhere. Can't live with the extra skin it is a health hazard for me. I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. My family fears for me. They are afraid of another horrible complication on the rise. And I find the more I think about what is in my future the more I want to eat for comfort. If it is not one thing it is another in this journey. I do have to get a grip and let it all happen. My body should even out. Everyone tells me that even my team says that. I am so frightened to gain it all back and feel so out of control right now. Some how I understand what you are going through but I am father down the line and have even more to deal with I think. Sure hope you don't find yourself here where I am. Much turmoil and emotional pain right now. And I too feel my BMI is too high. I am lost right now as to what to do to end this fear! All the best to you @Andrew0929

Being a victim of fat shaming myself. Those are some of the memories I will carry to my death. It is a horrible way to treat anyone. Thank you for bringing this to our attention Alex!

Thanks for sharing your story. Your zeal and progress thus far made me tear up. This is definitely not a sprint. It takes time to deal with all the issues and weight so that you can become a healthier and happier version of yourself! Your doing awesome! All the best @@Stoler42

Right now at 7 weeks out I would not eat raw veggies. I would wait until you completely heal and stick to easier foods to digest at this point. In a few weeks try a salad. A bite or two. At this point you really need to concentrate on the Protein and Water intake.

Congrats girl. Now just relax and let it happen with little fear. Soon you will be a loser like the rest of us. Welcome to the club!!!!!!!!!!!!

PLEASE give your body time to release everything they put in your body during surgery. Now along with that you are swollen and your tummy is vulnerable to anything you put in it except liquids. Please give it time to let the natural healing process to work. And take that scale and put it away for a month. Or better yet take it out back and hit it with a sledge hammer and only weigh yourself at the doctors office...( That is what I did and so I never experienced a gain or stall ever ) It is not about numbers. PLEASE remember that! It is about health and well being. Do not exercise until you are fully healed. Not a good idea to pull or stretch what has been done. Walking is the best at this point. It helps release all the stuff in your system...And starts to rebuild you up again....

LOL..Too cute..I have a pair of size 14 jeans that I call my fat pants. They have an elastic waist. I wear them when my stomach hurts...Size 14, I used to wear a 6X.... Feels great doesn't it!

What exactly is the safer route? @@Rogofulm Celery and carrot sticks? This program has many intricate parts and if you don't realize that WLS is a tool and not a diet to get your weight off and then return to your old ways.Then you misread me. It is a tool that gives you time to fix whatever is wrong with your thinking and why you use food as a comfort. It also gives you the time to learn new eating habits like using whole grains, fruit, nuts utilizing vegetables and lean meats and spices. Learning how to eat healthier without going back to your old ways of eating. Learning your trigger foods and weaknesses. What your weaknesses are and fixing your attitude and feelings. Knowing quality of food and eating the best. Not living on Mac and cheese. Living in the real world is exercising and getting your mind set to understand that we must eat to live not live to eat. Switching ourselves over to better habits and taking our time to eat. Moderation and balance is what we need to learn. Not mass! To say that being on a diet is safe. I disagree. They failed me and I will never see them as a positive thing for anyone. Failed diets are the reason so many suffer from weight gain in the first place. Not learning to eat properly and with moderation. With a diet we deny ourselves and soon we get tired of that and start to slip back into our old ways. We have to learn how to handle eating at various times and not use food as a celebration factor. We have to open ourselves up to be honest with ourselves and learn what makes us tick and change the things that made us get where we are. We need to learn how to Celebrate things other ways as well as our accomplishments. It is not an easy road if it was then 30 % would not fail. And why do a majority of that 30 % fail....Because they did not fix their brain and treated this as a diet like all the others. It became to hard to do and they were not able to change permanently. That is the path ahead of all of us when we have surgery. A work in progress. A change in life. The way we think, feel and know things differently then we did before. That is the goal of WLS. Not dieting! Just wanted to clear my comments up...... ( no one was hurt in the writing of this comment ) LOL

I am not on a diet. I am on a program that is to last me the rest of my life. I failed miserably at diets and so I don't do them anymore. I eat everything. Just not so much. I eat the same food my husband does but eat it in this order. Protein first, veggies, fruit and then carbs. If I am going to eat carbs I make sure the are a complex carb so that I get the best value. I have never counted calories. But have tried to make sure I drank my Water. Took my Vitamins and got 60-80 gm of protein in a day. I eat like a skinny person and plan to continue that way. My nut said that we live in the real world and that we better learn how to eat in that world as well. I have taken her advice and run with it. If I want a cookie I eat one. Not the box. That is the difference.

1) I can hold my grand daughter close to my chest and hug her tightly. 2) I can now go anywhere I want and no one knows me. It is like starting over in a sense. 3) I can now stand, walk, clean my house, cook and do my own laundry. Housework is a breeze. Before my hubby had to do it all because of the pain I was in before surgery!

Caster oil for your scars. It is the only thing that actually penetrates your scars and softens them so that you don't get that hard gristly feel to them.

loved Gmans comment on another thread like this one: At times in this life we are thrust into the inescapable presence of unpleasant people: the rude clerk at the DMV, the soap-allergic olfactory offender in the grocery line, the sulphuric mother of the sweet woman you are hopelessly in love with. Everything here is behind glass, it cannot hurt you without your permission, you can defeat any attack by the simple tap of a finger or voice command and go on unscathed with your life. Other than regular rules moderating by hosts and admins lecturing folks on being nice is an exercise in wheel spinning. The bad people are bad so they won't listen, the good people don't need to hear it. In my life the offensive people that I have the freedom to escape are normally dealt with by employing my best defensive tactic.... not being there. When I see their name, when I hear their voice, I occupy other space and experience other environs. My life is fraught with trouble enough without subjecting myself to self-torture. Forums like this remind me of a guy working quality inspection on a conveyer belt of peanuts. You occasionally see a bad nut, don't eat it, put it aside, move on.