Frustrated

Mine was on page 37 on 06/28/07 but there were lots posting their goals probably a week or so before me. And remember, we posted like crazy in those first couple of months so it could be a little hard to find yours. :crying:

Just checking in to let you know I didn't fall off the face of the planet. :smile: I stayed in bed today until my son came home from school at 3:30. The rest was good for me. I still don't feel 100% but I actually managed to get some food in me tonight and keep it down. I also managed to keep down all my fluids today. YAY!! :smile: So anyway, lazying around in bed today gave me time to think. I know that can be dangerous, but I went ahead anyway. :tt2: And I was remembering back to when I first joined this thread. One of the first posts I made here was about a list of goals we had when we were just going into this journey. I went back through my post history and found mine. Guess what? I achieved a LOT of my initial goals. :w00t: They went as follows: - To look in the mirror without feeling depressed or disgusted. I surprised myself when I achieved this last month when I accidentally saw myself in the mirror. - To sit on a chair/couch with my legs crossed. I tried it out on the couch just now. Mission accomplished. - To sit on a chair/couch, draw my legs up and rest my chin on my knees. I can draw my legs up, can't quite get my chin to my knees though. Still, I can draw my legs up! :biggrin2: - To not have to shop in the Plus section. Just went into the stores this weekend in the "normal people" section. - To not have to take a deep breath before having to get out of a chair or the car. I don't know when this happened, but I've been able to do this for a while. Probably since between Halloween and Xmas. - To not have my size be the first thing people notice about me. I don't know if I've achieved this yet. I haven't met any new people. - To be able to sit on Wicker furniture. Pretty sure I can do this. I'll have to go looking for some to sit on to test it out. Thing is, I don't even LIKE Wicker furniture. - To be able to tie my shoes on without working up a sweat. I don't even have to take a deep breath and hold it while tying my shoes! :thumbup: - To not waddle or swing my arm when I walk. (this one I make a conscience effort not to do, but at times when I'm tired, I catch myself in "fat waddle" mode. Mission accomplished. I think. No, I'm pretty sure. I definitely walk a lot more confidently. :crying: Okay ladies, can you find your initial goals and see how far you've progressed? I was stunned. Sometimes it seems so long ago when I started this, but it's only been a matter of months. And I would never have thought when I first composed that list that I'd be able to accomplish even half of those things within the first year. I've worked hard!! And it's paid off. I'm so proud of me. :biggrin2:

Morning ladies, I feel like crap today. :cursing: I think I'll just take myself back to bed. I've already done my treadmill for the day and usually it perks me up. Today it tired me out. So sounds like my body is telling me to rest. Just wanted to wish you all a Happy Valentine's Day. :tt1::wub::tt1::wub: Oh, and Stephanie, I loved your Mr Longlegs story. It was hilarious and I could see myself in the very same position; wanting to drop dead on the track but being too damn stubborn to do so.

That's a pretty tough one because I think it's all down to personal preference. For me my choice is the treadmill most of the time. When I started this band journey it was all I could do. The elliptical was just too much for me physically. To make things more challenging on the treadmill I increased the speed and the incline. Right now I think I'm maxed out on both unless I want to start running. I hate running. I believe if you're going to stick with an exercise, it's got to be one you enjoy. Or at the very least, one you don't hate. The thought of running to get in shape would have me back to couch potato in no time. This month though, I've started doing one or two workouts a week on the elliptical. It works me hard :tongue:. The beginner level is probably a lot harder of a workout than what I'm currently doing on the treadmill. And while I don't really enjoy it as much, I feel like I've worked harder and gotten more bang for my buck from it. I also don't hate it. I don't think I could use it as my only form of exercise right now though because I may lose interest in it if I have to continue to convince myself it's a good idea. But what I absolutely can't do without while I'm exercising, no matter what it is I'm doing, is my iPod. It keeps my mind occupied because I sing along with the music while I'm sweating and puffing and the time goes a LOT more quickly. On the occasions when I've forgotten it, my workout seems to last forever! :mad: I don't know if I'm helping you any with your decision though because I feel like my own choice would change at different points in this journey. Immediately after the band I would have gone for the treadmill no question at all. Right now I could go either way and still feel pretty good about my choice. As I lose more weight and I get more fit (omg, did I just say that? :tt2:) then I think I would want something a little more challenging, like the elliptical. Is it at all possible to rent an elliptical for a period of time to see if you like it and/or if it's worth keeping?

I'm probably afraid of maintenance as well. For all of my teen and adult life I was thinking about losing weight. The concept of keeping my weight the same is very foreign. I mean, am I supposed to get an unfill at some point? When is that point? If my goal weight differs from my doctor, will he not unfill me until HE'S satisfied? How do I eat? How do I exercise? What on earth will I do with myself with no restriction! :scared2: It's scary. And unfortunately Kari I have no answers for you. I could probably add to your long list of questions though, lol. When I joined this group I was fortunate enough to have my surgery at the end of the month. So everyone else had already experienced what I was about to and I could gain knowledge from that. You might have to be our guinea pig. :wink2:

PHEW! I'm glad I'm not alone. I have my goal weight set at 150 and to be honest I don't really know that I want to be there. According to the BMI chart it won't even make me healthy. I'd still be overweight. I'm 5'4 and need to be 145 to break into the "normal" zone. I don't know if I want to be that skinny though. Still, that's a little way off for me. Maybe when I drop another 10-15lbs I may reconsider. I haven't been in the 170s since I was at school; decades ago! :thumbup: One hurdle at a time. :smile2:

Morning ladies, Kari - I'm sorry you had a horrible birthday. :tt2: What you need to do next year is plan your own little birthday party. Heck, you can plan a belated birthday for yourself this week!!! Book a table at your restaurant of choice, dress yourself up pretty and go and enjoy YOU. Nobody else has to come with you, but let them know of your plans and if they want to tag along, they'll have to call and add themselves to your restaurant reservations. :tt2: One of my many mantras is "if I want something done right, I'll do it myself". God knows I love the two men in my life, but if I were to suddenly fall off the face of the earth they'd be lost without me. My son probably wouldn't even realise I was gone until he ran out of clean socks and underwear. :tt2: I went "almost" shopping this weekend. "Almost" as in I almost bought something, lol. I was going to buy new jeans. Finally! And I plucked up the courage to grab some 14s and 12s off the shelf. From the NORMAL people section! :tt2: I tried the 14s on and a couple of them fit okay, except that they were a little baggy on the sides of my thighs or were too long. Then I tried on the 12s and was surprised that I was able to actually get them up AND do the button up! :tt2: They were a little more snug and I didn't like how my tummy kind of oozed over the top of them. They were low riding hipsters though and I didn't realise I'd grabbed them. Probably wasn't looking properly as it's been too long since I was in the normal section of the store. :cursing: I'm very impatient when it comes to shopping and that had run out by the time I'd tried on the 4 different pairs. But it felt wonderful being able to get into both sizes! My NSV for the weekend. Maybe next weekend I'll actually buy a pair or two. :tt2:

Something you may not have considered, but it could be the chicken itself that is giving you problems. For me, since I was banded, chicken has been hit and miss. Some days I can tolerate a small amount, other days as soon as I put it in my mouth I just know I have to spit it out because I'll have problems. You can have 5 people with the lap band have 5 different experiences with chicken. 1) No problems at all. 2) Can eat it so long as it's the white meat only. 3) Can eat it so long as it's the dark meat only. 4) Can eat it so long as it's hot. 5) Can eat it so long as it's cold. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. And it's just with chicken. You could substitute bread or potato or any food/drink at all and have the same kind of results. When you start back on your foods, take it really, really slowly. Perhaps a few crackers on your soup to start with. Then mushy foods like yoghurt, mashed potato, cottage cheese, egg. Progress to something a little sturdier after a day or two, like canned tuna, softened fruit and veg, etc and slowly introduce other foods. There are just some foods that will not go down. Remember that when making your own choices. It can change all the time too. You might be able to get rice down no problem at all this month, then next month your body does a complete turnaround and you can't even think about rice. Just adjust accordingly when these little obstacles surface.

I just had my 3rd fill 9 days ago and have been finding it a lot tougher this time around. I'm probably more restricted than I should be. The ONLY thing that stops me from going to get an unfill is the fact that my appetite has disappeared. It's sooooooooo good not having to deal with the hunger demon in my head. I DO NOT MISS BEING HUNGRY! :biggrin2: I've had a problem with being uncomfortable with burping during the day. At night there's the foamy build-up that can wake me during the night coughing and choking. I've discovered that sleeping more upright helps with that. It's not very comfortable and it took me about 5 nights before I actually slept through, but that seems to have subsided now. *touch wood* I also stopped drinking or eating anything within a couple of hours before bedtime so that there's nothing in my tummy to trigger it. That seems to have helped as well. I've managed to eat a soft boiled egg the other day. I can eat crackers (about 3 or 4) once in a while and I had a couple of teaspoons of tuna salad yesterday as well. It's tough going and at times I want to call the doctor and go for an unfill. But I've managed to find a way to get through the little obstacles that make me uncomfortable. When I start burping and can't seem to stop, I'll make myself a cup of hot tea and drink my way through that (it has to stay hot) and once I'm done with it the burps will go away. I tried Pepcid complete and it worked a couple of times, but the last 2 times it seemed to make things worse. So right now it's just hot fluids for me. I miss drinking ice cold Water, but when I do it sets off that bubbling in my tummy. So at the moment I'm just limited to rinsing my mouth with cold water as I would after brushing my teeth. It gives me that cool mouth feeling without filling myself up with water that will probably set off an uncomfortable burp and bubble-athon. I worry that I'm not getting all my Protein, and that's why when I DO eat, I'll try to make it something high in protein like egg or tuna. I just can't get any whey protein down at the moment because the consistency reminds me of the bubble foam I've been spitting out for the past week and a bit. :thumbup: I might get some of this unjury I've heard so much about and see if I can tolerate that. If I can't today, that's okay. Next week things might have changed again and I can. My advice is to try different things for different problems until you find something that works. Then expect that that solution may suddenly change as well. I never had this burping problem with any of my other fills. This journey is forever changing for me and I have to keep changing my strategy as well to keep ahead. But that's okay. I'd rather do that any day than have back all the weight I've lost since I was banded! Onward and upward! :eek:

Hey Felicia, When was the last time you had a fill? Could it be time for one? How much are you eating? During the times you feel you're failing, are you dealing with stress? For many of us food has been a comfort. So when something goes wrong, we reach for our faithful friend. Food is always there. What you have to do is shift your focus in another direction. For me it's cleaning out a kitchen drawer or something. I'm not really a neat freak, in fact I'm kinda messy and cluttery. So clearing something away keeps me focused on the task and not on what I can put in my mouth. If I don't feel like cleaning, I'll write an e-mail to someone in my family whom I haven't contacted in a while. I'm terrible with correspondence as well. So when I have a weak food moment, I'll shift that focus to one of my other weak areas. What about exercise? Are you getting enough in per week? Buy yourself a pedometer. You can pick up a decent one for less than $10. Then make sure you're getting in 10,000 steps per day. It sounds like a lot of working, but once you get used to it, you can find ways to easily clock up the steps. Walking to the corner store and back for milk or just because will be good for you. Are you getting your daily Water intake? I've noticed that when I'm strict with myself over my water, I'm less inclined to snack or over-eat. Sometimes it can be hard sitting there and making your way through a full glass at a time, so I've taken to carrying a water bottle around with me. Yeah, I've become one of those people who used to annoy me. I couldn't understand why all these young girls would carry water with them. I thought it was some kind of fashion statement to show they were young and trendy. :thumbup: I've discovered it's actually a good idea. And I'll make up little drink regimes for myself to get through my water. Taking a sip every time I open a new window on the computer. Or after every post I read, or during the commercial breaks while watching TV. The water disappears a lot quicker that way and before I know it, I've reached my daily requirement. Hope this gives you a few things to think about. Good luck getting back on the bandwagon. We all stumble off at times, but there are plenty of people here willing to hold out a hand and hoist you back on board. :biggrin2:

You're looking fantastic Karri! I love that shot of you with both legs in one jeans leg. You look like your own much younger sister. :biggrin2:

Welcome back CeCe. :thumbup: Is your signature right? Are you really only 6lbs off your goal weight?:tt2: That's amazing! Imagine where you'd be if you didn't have to deal with the stresses in your life right now. Hopefully it's only temporary and you can get back on the bandwagon with us. Maybe we should get our band angel to waggle her finger at you and make you check in more often. :tt1: It does seem like a lot of us are on downers at the moment. Perhaps it's simply a case of the February blahs. OMG I must be losing it. I looked at phyll's message about the chocolate bar with a bite taken out of it and immediately thought "I'll take a bite too." I hate when my fat head sneaks up on me like that lol.

I've been finding it so hard to get in my daily water intake. :glare: It's not from lack of trying, but geez louise, it sends me into a burping fit for about 20 minutes when I try and sip through even 8oz of water. It sits in my pouch and bubbles away and I'm either burping like crazy or spitting up foam. :confused2: So now I've taken to heating my water up. It doesn't taste so great to me hot, but it's the only way I can make my way through it without struggling and suffering afterwards. This is hard. :eek:

Jackie take a look at your ticker. You're more than halfway to your goal! Would you have thought that possible 6 months out of your surgery? I certainly didn't. Yet here I am. I've been through the yo-yo period that you're going through now. Yeah, it sure as hell is frustrating and de-motivating. Last night Janet posted a link to a 5 day pouch test page. I read through some of it last night and found it really, really interesting. It helps you to decide whether or not you need a fill. Now I know you say you don't because you have good restriction, but the diet plan set out there sounds like a good one. It's worth giving it a shot. It only lasts for 5 days. It may just boost those scales back into action again. The right way! I bookmarked it for future reference. Surgical Weight Loss 5 Day Pouch Test

My name is Ruby and I'm addicted to scales. It's been an hour since I last weighed myself. Hey, at least I've limited my addiction to 2 hits a day. :tongue2:

I don't know if I can apportion percentages for the band itself. It's there to physically stop me from making bad choices, but 100% of those choices are mine. I can still make bad choices. I can still fail at this. What the band doesn't do is stop me from thinking. I can still think I'm hungry when I'm not. I can still think I don't need to exercise when I do. I can still think that certain foods will go down no problem at all when they won't. All of this I have to do on my own. The band doesn't do any of that. So if I were to think for a second that the band was going to take care of 70% of the effort needed to lose this weight, I'd be setting myself up for failure. The reality is, it doesn't. What it will do is stop me from eating too much when my restriction is in the right spot. What it will do is make me physically ill when I've eaten too much or eaten the wrong thing. But I still have to make the choices of what to put in my mouth to begin with. I could cheat by sitting here all day and popping an M&M in my mouth every 20 seconds and have it slip through my band without any problem at all. It's ME that makes the choice not to do that 100% of the time. Not my band. But could I lose weight successfully without my band? Absolutely not. And that's why I don't know how much of a percentage to give it. While all the decisions are mine, the band is a stomach conscience that can't be bargained with. But it's not made of magic. It doesn't lose the weight for me. It just stops me from making the wrong choices and that's it. And I feel, like some of the others, if you believe this band is going to be doing all the work for you when it comes to losing the weight, you're doomed to fail. It won't.

I'll head over to that thread and put my $0.02 worth in a little later. For now I'm off for a walk to the P.O to mail some things, then pick up something for hubby's lunch. But when I get back I'll go to that thread you mentioned. I did a search on your posts to find out where it was.

I'd be doomed to fail if I thought the band was going to do 75% of the work! I don't think I've ever expected ANY weight loss regime to do the work for me. Every food choice I make is mine. Every exercise choice I make is mine. Every mistake I make is mine. It's a lifetime of MY choices. The band doesn't run my life, nor should it ever. It's there to help me run it properly and effectively because nothing else has worked so far. Someone in another thread needs an attitude adjustment.

I couldn't agree more. It's just as good for your mental health as it is for your physical. For me, if I don't do SOMETHING it makes me feel like I've been lazy for the whole day. Even going out for a 20 minute walk around the neighborhood or on a treadmill gives you something to brag about. "I wasn't lazy today, I walked for 20 minutes!" On the flip side of that, if you don't do anything, your head tells you "I'm lazy, I couldn't even find time to walk today. :frown:" It really does make a big difference. Even if that difference isn't reflected on the scales.

Good morning ladies. I'm in a gooooooooooood mood today. I managed to sleep through the entire night without choking on my spit. :drool: I tell ya, I'm so much happier when I've gotten a decent sleep. I'm a grumpy old bear otherwise. I also managed some room temp carrot juice with Greens+ (a multi-vitamin powder) in it. It took me 2 hours to get down the whole glass, but I didn't PB any of it up! YAY. I was back in the gym this morning, and that's got my energy going again as well. I didn't get around to trying to eat anything yesterday, with the exception of 3 wheat crackers for dinner and I'm still not hungry today. But I might try that egg a little later on. The fluids have been going down easier since last night. I managed 2 cups of tea and some soup. Today I think will be the first I'll be able to get all my water requirements in. If I go slowly. And the water isn't cold. I'm also down to 186lbs today. My official weigh in day isn't until Sat. I don't change my ticker until then. And typically when I've gained, I don't change it at all. So I'm looking forward to being able to make that adjustment as well. :biggrin2: All-in-all things are looking up, and I'm a much happier camper. Peaches that joke was funny. I showed it to my hubby and he laughed as well. Then I told him I was going to buy a mood ring and the smile disappeared off his face in an instant. Then we both laughed at that. :laugh: Karri - wow, running for a mile? I can't even wrap my head around that. Congratulations you! You're like the energizer bunny of our thread. Phyl have you tried Lane Bryant for bras? I go in there semi-regularly but I don't always buy anything. I'm a cheapskate and usually wait for things to go on sale. :cursing: They might be able to give you a proper fitting too, depending on the size of the store and number of staff they have. Janet - good morning. I've come to expect you to have left a little message for your flock every morning. When it's not here I think there's something wrong with the world. It's always comforting to have our band angel check in each day. :eek:

Peaches is that your before pic? Because if it is, you're looking good there. You must look fantastic now! Steph I can see a definite difference in your face. Your cheeks aren't so puffy. Sorry if that sounds bad, it's meant to be a compliment. You can also see the makings of a smaller waist there. It's starting to come in in the middle. I'd love to have a waist. I don't know if I'm ever going to get one. I don't even remember if I ever had one. :eek:

Y'know Lori, nobody can beat us up as well as we can do it ourselves. And that's what I see from your first post. And I'm sorry, but I'm not going to jump on that bandwagon and beat you up any more. I don't have to. You've done a decent job of that on your own. However....... I don't see that you've failed. Honestly. You've taken a step back, yes, but there are many backwards steps that we all take. To keep going back is a failure. You're all set to step up again, right? Right. So let's get you on your way. Firstly, and I didn't find this out until my most recent fill last week, as our weight drops, the tightness we initially feel from the band loosens because we're losing weight everywhere. Even around that part of the stomach where the band is connected. My doctor told me to expect to be back in there after I've dropped another 20lbs simply because it will be too loose. That's not a failure. I kept putting my fill off because I thought it was either too soon, I wasn't trying hard enough to stop eating, I was gaining weight and was too embarrassed to tell him. That's the wrong way to think. The band is a tool to lose weight. And I wasn't using that tool effectively. Visiting your doctor when you feel you need to isn't a failure. Putting weight back on after losing so much and working so hard isn't a failure. It just means your tool needs tweaking. You made the wrong choices during Stupidbowl, as WCFG so eloquently put it , but that was one setback. One. Allow yourself to have these minor setbacks. We're not going to be successful 100% of the time. That's an unrealistic goal. Good luck with your fill on Friday. Don't be afraid or ashamed to tell your doctor your frustrations and setbacks. That's part of his job. And so many of his other patients will have had the same issues, so he'll be able to guide you in the right direction. He's not going to be disgusted with you. If he is, he's the wrong man to be seeing because he doesn't understand the inward struggles this condition brings to its sufferers. Chin up and hang in there. :eek:

I had a fill on Friday and was also close to getting an unfill. Something I discovered was that hot tea would go down easier than cold Water and I didn't burp or PB nearly as much. So I thought it was probably a temperature thing and tried sticking with only hot fluids. But then the cream Soups were having the same effect, so I cut back further and kept with clear hot fluids. And it seemed to have got me through the worst of the tightness. This was different to the last tight fill I had. And if I've learned anything on my journey so far, it's that things are always changing. What may have worked to help me get through the tougher times of the first fill, didn't work for the second, and changed again with this third. You just have to try and find that magic formula for yourself each time something changes.

Hi Vex, It sounds like you're eating an awful lot of food to me. Yes, I know it's healthy food, but your Snacks seem just as big as a meal should be. It makes me wonder if your pouch has stretched, or perhaps it was too big to begin with. Those are question that should be answered by your surgeon, and if you can't get there for a consultation, you should at the very least be able to speak with someone from his office on the phone regarding your concerns. That should be your first step. Are you getting in your daily Water requirement? 68oz a day? Sometimes our bodies confuse hunger with thirst. The water not only keeps you hydrated, but it will make you feel fuller. At certain times of the month I don't drink all my water because I feel bloated. That's hormones for you. But by and large your water intake should be as important to you as getting your Protein, meal choices and exercise requirements. As far as exercise goes, it's not about working harder, it's about working smarter. Running is great exercise, and if you enjoy it, you'll be more inclined to do it more often. But it's not just about working as hard as you can for 20-30 minutes. You have to enjoy what you're doing and see some results from that work. Try another form of exercise for a little bit; swimming, cycling, kick boxing classes.....Do more walking than you do driving in a day. If, for example, you have a 20 minute drive to and from work, clock up the same amount of time in walking. Or get a pedometer (they're relatively inexpensive) and make sure you're walking 10,000 steps per day. As for the time and expense involved in getting a band adjustment, sometimes that's the price we need to pay. And if you can't afford it now, do what you can to stay on track until you can. Don't just give up and make the wrong choices with the intent of setting things right when you have the time and finances. Our bands were never meant to be a magical cure for obesity, no matter how much we want for them to be. It's just a tool. And right now your tool isn't working as well as it should, so until you can get it fixed, do what you can to minimise the damage. Best of luck. Keep us updated on your progress, or lack thereof.

Wow Jackie! I need some of that confidence! Lachica - thank you so much for your comment. You've put a smile on my face and a bounce in my step for the day. :confused: