Obsidian

Thanks all for the kind words of encouragement! Xanax! I have that prescribed for my anxiety, I will have to ask my surgeon if it is ok to take the morning of the surgery to keep me calm. I worry about taking a sedative like that along with the anesthesia they will be using. But then again I worry about everything. Although I think my nervousness may override any Xanax! LOL Hiya AdeptDreamer! Yay for Feb 4th! I start the pre-op diet on Sunday as well (technically I think the lady told me to start it on the 21st on the paperwork but close enough). I am sort of starting now though because I am so close to the 400lb limit for the surgery I definitely want to stay under that when I see them on Monday. I have a BUNCH of pre-op appointments on Monday. Starting at like 8AM and going till NOON! I will be seeing everyone basically.. financial, nutritionist, psychologist, surgeon.. etc. Then they want to see me again on the 29th. Then finally the big day. Honestly right this moment I'm excited to have it done finally and I KNOW that I can succeed with the help of my surgery. I'm also very nervous.. butterflies in the stomach kind of nervous. It's just those weird moments where I feel almost like.. nothing at all.. that is kind of unnerving. I'm not having any second thoughts tho, that is good. Just sort of a quiet acceptance that this HAS to be done. I've tried everything else over the last decade. Plus, I have horrible arthritis in my knees that I have to take narcotics for (I don't like how they make me feel), so I basically started telling myself that I should consider this a necessary surgery for my knees. I will likely have to have knee replacement one day, but for now this is my first "knee surgery"... so to speak.

I haven't had surgery yet so I can't talk about the hair loss that will come from it. But a couple years back I went through a bad time with my anxiety. I spent whole year in some heightened state of fight or flight. Heart was constantly over 100 bpm, whole body tense, and constantly afraid I was going to die to the point where my husband would stay awake to watch me fall asleep because I wouldn't go to sleep otherwise. It was a horrible year let me tell you! Oh and yes.. stress will make your hair fall out. I have always had super thick hair but that year I suddenly found myself with quickly thinning hair (added to the anxiety let me tell you). Somehow, someway, I broke out of that weird constant state of stress and found myself with the thinnest hair I probably have had since being a baby. I forced myself not to dwell on it. It's taken some time but my hair is regained some (if not most) of the thickness. I learned to no worry so much (about my hair anyway)... because stress or diet changes that can cause it to fall out can be fixed and your hair WILL come back.

Hello. I started the process back in December 2011. I have been working with the nutritionist and have seen the psychologist twice. I've gotten my six months worth of doctor progress notes and everything is in order. However i have yet to see the surgeon. They wont schedule me until i get under 400 lbs on my own. They won't do any of the surgeries unless you are under 400. I don't see too many on the forums with the same problem as mine.. or many people doing this near or over 400.. but I'm curious if anyone else has run across this? Currently I'm out of town swimming a lot to lose weight and I've lost almost 20 lbs since being here and am at 404. I don't plan on leaving to go back soon since the weight is coming off fast and easy with the swimming. I'd like to get well under 400 before i go back. Assuming they will even let me pick up where i left off. I've had moments where I've considered not doing it at all because i am doing the one exercise that i love (and CAN actually do because of bad arthritis in my knees that I'm prescribed narcotics for) and feeling pretty good considering. But i also know how easy the weight can come back since I've lost 100lbs in the past with low carb and exercise and subsequently regained. I had a hard time convincing myself to do this in the first place since i have severe anxiety and a bit of a phobia of drugs and procedures. So they delays are hard on me since they are making me second guess. I'm currently trying desperately to convince myself to stick with it. Guess I'm hoping to find someone with a similar experience.

Thank you all for the kind words. I will push myself forward through this process and have until the last moment to change my mind. The only thing that is holding me back is my fears. Yet I know I am not truly living because my weight has always prevented me from doing what I have always wanted. I will undoubtedly have more times when I second guess myself and I am glad to have found this awesome community. Again thank you for the support. Sent from my DROID RAZR using VST