I have been overweight since 1st grade. I don't mean huge obese but Overweight all the same or as I vividly remember being called Husky, Fat, Pudgy, so on. I remember having to buy boy’s size husky because they didn’t make girls size jeans to fit and the misses sizes were way to long. I remember in 5th grade wearing my mother's clothes to school (5th grade!). I recall eating butter out of the empty refrigerator and I would wait until no one was looking and take extra and eat it outside or in my closet. I ate as an escape and for comfort.
When I played youth softball I was always #12 because it was always the XL jersey. I always wished for #1 the small.
In 5th 6th 7th 8th 9th, 10th grade I wanted to be the cute girl that the boys liked. By the time high school rolled around I started looking for ways to be popular because slim pretty girl was not going to do it for me. I started playing BALL. Basketball, Volleyball, Softball, Shot-put and discus in track. And it worked! By the time summer came before 11th grade I have played my way into a slimmer me. NOT skinny mind you but not chubby either. I spent that summer running for exercise every night. Senior year was great but because I stopped the EXTRA exercise (running) I added a few pounds and this is where the real dieting started. When I was in high school you couldn't just run to a doctor for diet pills sooooooo a friend’s college brother sold "yellow jackets" and I bought some. I guess you could say I was skinny for a year or so. Then of course the college freshman 15-20lbs and for my college years I would say chubby was back. Size 12/14 and I stayed there until 23-24yrs old. By the time I married I was size 16. (I never owned a scale so I have no idea what I weighted)
Let me tell you shopping for a wedding dress size 16 in the late 90's was NO fun. And it began.
I dieted on and off for the next few years until my first pregnancy. I began it as a size 18 and gained 60lbs. 5 months after having my first I was pregnant again (yes I know how it happens ) I gained 20 pounds with the second pregnancy. For the next 5 years I tried everything. Atkins, Weightwatchers, Soup diet, diet patches, herbal pills, over the counter pills and stayed between size 18-22.
Baby #3 and my weight was 250 right after delivering and then 236 around a year after and I decided I needed to consider a major change so in 2007 I looked into WLS surgery. Instead I decided to tray a diet doctor - Metabolic Weightloss. 8 months and I lost 55lbs and was at 178lb my lowest in years. I felt GREAT. but it was a diet. Slowly over the next 5 years I have added EVERY pound back. AND again find myself looking into WLS. Of course my insurance will not cover it so I need to decide what to do.
DESISION MADE!
239lbs and I am scheduled for Sleeve Surgery Tijuana Mexico
Had my second post surgical appointment last Friday, down 20 pounds since surgery. I feel blessed that I have had ZERO complications. Dr. Kim's assistant said my risk of leaks or other complications was practically zero now, and that I was no longer a surgery patient, but was instead just a weight loss patient. I am very thankful to have been given this opportunity. I'm thankful for all the support I got from VST, as well as from my wife and family. I am looking forward to being a normal weight, for the first time in my life!
i wish yesterday was my last day of work.... Those people are stressing me out!
A coworker of mine yesterday asked me when surgery was (I've only told them I need to get my lapband corrected....they don't know I'm getting the sleeve!) so I told her it was next Tuesday.... In a rude attitude, her response was "so your getting the lapband removed right? Because I don't see why you can't lose the weight with just diet and exercise!"
this coworker of mine literally weighs 93lbs, has never had an eating problem in her life.... She's just this cute, tiny little Asian woman, about 35-40 years old.......and she's got the nerve to tell someone 3x's her size that 'diet and exercise' a going to fix me????!!!!! Oh hell no! I was so upset at that point.... I honestly didn't know how to respond to that. I just simply and softly responded with "I'm sure you have no clue what it's like to be this big and this disgusted in yourself. I'm glad diet and exercise work for you, but this is my body and my choice"
the look on her face was pure stunned..... I'm pretty sure no one has ever responded to her rudeness like that before....
I'm so tired of people telling me what I should and should not do with this body of mine.... "god gave you this body" yes....he did..... And unfortunately, I ruined it and I'm trying to get it back.....so shove off!
lord grant me the strength to continue to deal with these haters.... Help me see that they motivating me to work harder at the body I want!
anyone else have these issues with friends/family/coworkers who don't know what it's like being like us?
how did you deal with it?
