melissalee

Amoro, I think we have all been at this stage. We have all failed before, it's hard to imagine finally succeeding. But you will see that this little band will give you the tools and incentive to succeed and live the life you were meant for. Good luck to you and know that all of us on the board are here to support one another as only we can understand the path we have chosen.

WillPower, I love your quote. Always gives me a laugh. Don't get discouraged. It took me two years and 2 appeals to get it taken care of. Like you, my insurance changed and I got lucky. The old insurance was through my hubby's union and they did nothing but give me grief but thankfully, they changed over to BCBS and in a matter of months, I was approved. It can be an overwhelmingly frustrating process but in the end, it is all worth it. Here's keeping the fingers crossed!!

Jonathan, We've all been done that road too many times to count but this time, you've got a grat tool and a great support group! P.S. You ARE a cutie!!!

This was actually one of the issues that came up with my psychologist prior to my surgery, one that she felt needed to be understood and dealt with. Her thoughts were that when one loses the weight, it's not just layers of fat that come off but layers of resentments, attitudes and years of issues that become exposed and come off in the end too. She told me that alot of the time, the dynamics of a relationship will change because for so long, as an obese person, we have allowed ourselves to be bossed around and/or controlled because our self-esteem was so low, whether we meant it so or not. Often, the power in a relationship can shift as we lose the weight because suddenly we have more energy and confidence and it isn't always taken well by the patient or the spouse/significant other. She never stated that WLS was a reason for a divorce but rather the catalyst that uncovers other issues that you may not have wanted to or could deal with in the marriage. I appreciated her candidness and even had my husband come into a couple of sessions with me as we have had our issues and I wanted him to know what we were both getting ourselves into with me having this surgery. My husband is an exercise and health fanatic and we have always had an issue, not with my way, but with his obsession with wanting to help me. He has never said anything about my weight but if I ask him his opinion on what food to eat or what kind of exercise to do, he just goes overboard and my first reaction is to rebel and do the exact opposite just to spite him, to show him that he can't be right. But that's my issue. More than anything else, my fear was that I would resent him, or anyone else who would suddenly be paying attention to me once I lost the weight and the possibility that I would sabatoge myself because of it. His fear was that I would lose the weight and leave him. But slowly, as the weight has come off, I have found that my husband is basking in my newfound energy and excitement. He calls me at work everyday just to tell me that he loves me and I often catch him just staring at me. And although I want to lose this weight moreso to have a happier and healthier life for my daughter and my husband, I can't help wanting to give him back the girl he met 10 years and 150 pounds ago. I think he deserves that just as much as I do.

Congratulations!! We'll be counting down with you so keep us posted!!:Bunny :Bunny :Bunny

WTG Rachel!! One step closer to the new and improved you! Congratulations! :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana

GOOD FOR YOU!!! :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana

Congratulations Vera!! And here's to a great new year!!! :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana

I got spoiled on my Tylenol with Codeine and wasn't too happy when that ran out on day 3 so I tried just regular liquid Tylenol and that helped a little but honestly, the best medicine for me was just getting up and out. Even if it was just shopping, window shopping at that. It helped me keep my mind off of things as well as helped my body bounce back. But even still after 2 weeks at home, I fell apart my first day of work and didn't even think I'd make it to 5! Depression is definately a part of it, at least it was for me and I had my moments of completely regretting it, wanting to head to the first drive-thru and gorge myself. I was totally feeling sorry for myself as I sat around watching tv being tortured by popcorn and fast food commercials. But that's why getting out and about is good too as it gives you less opportunity to sit around feeling sorry for yourself. You'll bounce back soon Alice and use this board and your fellow bandsters for support as we have all been there and can understand how you feel. Soon enough you will have forgotten the pain and the depression and be basking in your weightloss and rejoicing the new you!

Frank, y'all look amazing. Keep up the good work!! Here's to a great new year!

Wow, what an inspiration. I can only hope to have that problem someday. You are looking great. Have a safe trip!

Well, my surgeon was pretty strict. I was on clear liquids for jsut about a week, until my followup appt to release me to go back to work and then he had me on liquids for an additional 5 weeks, then straight to regular foods. I could have Crystal lite, broth, some cream Soups, Jello, etc. I only made itabout 4 weeks before I started adding some more substantial things but I certainly got creative. I would take black Beans, ham, spices and chicken broth and make my own Soup with melted cheese on top. But in the end it was worth it as I not only lost nearly 25 # during that time but I really felt as though my body was cleansed of all the diet coke and junk food I had been feeding it for so long. Did you Dr. give you a specific diet or timeline to follow? I know that alot of people on the board were only on the liquids for a week or two before moving to mushies and then real food once they had their fill. I think it just depends on the Dr. and the individual person. Good Luck and welcome to bandland!!!

I'm blushing just reading this thread! Makes me wish I had a hopped in there with you!! :nervous

Wow Alex, you look amazing. WTG!! You are an inspiration! Beautiful!!

Thanks Kelly! I am finally seen!! Thanks to all of you and here's to the BEST IS YET TO COME!!!

I woke up this morning to a cold snowy Chicago morning and started my regular routine-brushing my teeth and hair, getting my daughter ready, fixing Breakfast. Just your ordinary Wednesday morning. But suddenly, I noticed this person staring at me, someone I knew but couldn't quite put a name to the face. And as I am so blatantly staring back at this person, I slowly begin to realize that this isn't just any person but me, not the me I usually think of, hidden under large sweaters and tunic tops coupled with a pair of stretch, wide-legged pants and sensible shoes but the me I can faintly recall from years ago, before I forgot how to take care of myself and feel as though I look good. Before 12 packs of diet coke and bottles of wine had turned my complection gray and put dark circles under my eyes. Before weight and lack of exercise made my ankles, legs and hands swell to the point that I was in pain everytime I got up because the skin was stretched even moreso. And I look at this person who has a neck and cheekbones and who's blue eyes are bright and full of life. This person with a twinkle in her eye and broad and secure smile that says "damn I look good!". And I smile at this person who I have missed so much and I say to them "this is only the beginning...". Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all...

OK Kelly, how on earth did you do that? I'v had multiple aggravation trying to get my pic in my avatar or even to be able to attach without it being a link. ARGH! Could you please show me how to do that with the other picture. I reduced to the right size but it still won't show up!! THis pic I took with my phone and is not so clear. Thanks for any help you can give! :banana :banana

I, too, have only one regret and that's not having the opportunity to do it sooner. I feel sometimes like I've lost out on the first 4 years of my daughters life because I was so incapable of really "experiencing" it with her, i.e., teaching her how to ride a bike and to rollerblade, playing for hours in the playground and practicing catch, sliding down the slide with her. All those things my husband got to do that I had to watch from the sidelines because I was always "too tired". It got to the point that my daughter would start every request of me with a "momma, are you too tired to...?" So, yes, I regret those years but I told her to watch out next summer, her momma's gonna be ON THE GO!!!

My surgeon told me that the main reason for quitting smoking before the surgery was because of the anesthesia and the possible problems that could occur if you smoke. I, luckily, quit years ago and only partake on occassion but he said that if I had any inkling to do so before I had the surgery, to think twice about it, especially since I already had sleep apnea and that, in itself would provide it's own set of problems. In fact, I had to spend my aftercare in the ICU because of my difficulty in coming out of the anesthesia. My suggestion is that if you can stop now, before the surgery, then you should at least try. I'm the type that would rather quit it all cold turkey than allow one excessive behavior to transfer itself to another. I quit the food, diet coke (my worst bad habit) and drinking alcohol all together and I am definately feeling the better for it. Anyway, maybe you could just try to quit for now, for the surgery itself, and if it gets too hard after, well, then. I think the benefit will be that you allowed your body to be as healthy as possible during such a strenuous time.

After reading some of these posts, it's hard to write about myself and not feel like I'm overindulging myself but there is a rhyme and a reason to how I got here. I grew up in that Beaver Cleaver family with a mother and faher who adored each other and us as well. I have an older brother and sister who I hated and adored all through my early years. We were poor but always had enough food on the table and my parents were always able to save up enough to give us a family vacation every year. One would think that our lives were perfect except that from my earliest recollection I was always unhappy, depressed and fat. And looking at the pictures of myself at the young age of 5 or 7 or 10, I don't look fat, a little chunky maybe but not fat. But that's the word that sticks in my brain, the word that caused me hours of unhappiness and crying alone in my room. The word that caused me to quit ballet and tap and gymnastics and softball. Not that I couldn't physically do these things but because no one wanted to watch a fat girl in a tutu, or a fat girl in sequins or watch the fat girl get out of breath when she tried to run around the bases even though she had just hit a home run. And in the midst of all this love and family and fatness, there was my mother, who was fat, and my sister, who was most definately not fat and this idea that everything my mother had once wanted to be was being lived out in my sister and not me because I was fat just like she was. And my brother the jock with his cute friends would protect and take care of my sister, who was just a delicate thing and I could always take care of myself and mow the lawn when he wouldn't because I was fat and I could take care of myself. And so I became the bully, the boisterous one. Loud and strong on the outside, commanding the attention of everyone, making straight A's, excelling in everything I did. And I had friends, everyone wanted to be my friend, the fat fun girl's friend. I did it all and I did it the best and never once would anyone be able to figure out that inside there was a little fat girl who wanted to look pretty. And even in high school when I finally lost the baby fat and became a woman with hips and boobs and a little waist, the ghost of the fat girl haunted me. It was then I learned the power of sex and I used it all through my college years. Revenge for the fat girl. They would never take me out but they would s**** me. And I found a way to control the feelings by binging and eating and didn't it feel good purge it, like purging all that anger and frustration of the little fat girl. A cycle of ups and downs that landed me in the hospital more than a few times and no one could figure out why this girl who had "such a beautiful face if only she would lose some weight" couldn't get her act together. Why she spent days locked in her apartment with 6 boxes of twinkies and a bucket of chicken hiding under the bed, unbeknownst to all. Why she had debt from buying hundreds of dollars of food that could be eaten in a day. Why she was just unhappy all the time. And all the while, my mother would tell me to eat healthy and exercise and I would find a good man, someone who would accept me for who I was while talking about how all my brother's friends were in love with my sister and why couldn't she just pick a good one rather than the bad ones and that I should be happy if I'm picked at all. So I did find one, that man who loves me for who I am and tells me I'm beautiful, and I got pregnant and had a little girl who I look at everyday and worry that she's going to be a fat girl. I pray that I don't screw her up and make her think that she's not beautiful, no matter what she weighs or how smart she is. And I remember the little fat girl now when I'm driving home wanting to stop at the Burger King for a double whopper meal and a chicken sandwich with a large diet coke that I can so expertly eat in the car before I get home, throwing the bag in the garbage on the way in so as not to let my husband know that I've been binging again. And I thank my band for not allowing me the ability to binge and giving me that pause to think about why I need to eat that food in excess. And for letting me let go of the little fat girl who just wanted to be pretty.

I had my fill done under flouro at the hospital, not by my surgeon I might add, and they charged my insurance nearly $1000!! He ahd to do it twice, once to put too much in, then the barrium, then again to take some out and barrium again. Seems like I shouldn't be charged twice for his mistake but it is the insurance... Unfortunately, it's the beginning of the year for me so back to paying my deductable. That should take the fun all out of it.

Beautiful Mary! Thanks for sharing!

Wow, Heather, you look amazing. An inspiration to us all! I can't wait til I can post some of my before and after like that! But I've got a little ways to go. Maybe by then it will be sexy summer dressing weather! What better way to show off!

Good for you! I think whatever decision you make, as long as you are happy with it then that's all that matters. I as on my second appeal with my insurance company when I decided that no matter the outcome this time, I was going to have it done with my surgeon whether I had to pay for it or not. Luckily, my insurance did come through at the last minute so I was lucky, but as you said, that may happen with you as well. Good luck to you and we are here to support.

Good for you Victoria!! I don't feel hardly any restriction with my fill and it was done under flrouroscope but the dr. (not my regular surgeon) that did it put too much in at first so them took some out but when he pulled out the needle, saline sprayed everywhere so I am going to request that my surgeon do it the next time, even if I have to pay extra. But the most important thing I have to remember is that the band is not a fix all and I have a choice of eating the whole burger if my restriction isn't tight enough or putting it aside and allowing myself to feel my fullness. Just because you don't PB doesn't mean you aren't restricted. Good luck to you and Chin UP!!