HarleyNana

Why God made moms" answers given by elementary school age children to the following questions: Why did God make mothers? 1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is. 2. Mostly to clean the house. 3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. How did God make mothers? 1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us. 2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. What ingredients are mothers made of? 1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. 2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. Why did God give you your mother and not some other Mom? 1. We're related. 2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. What kind of little girl was your Mom? 1. My Mom has always been my Mom and none of that other stuff. 2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. 3. They say she used to be nice. What did Mom need to know about dad before she married him? 1. His last name. 2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer? 3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? Why did your Mom marry your dad? 1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. 2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. Who's the boss at your house? 1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. 2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed. 3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. What's the difference between moms and dads? 1. Moms work at work &work at home, &dads just go to work at work. 2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them. 3. Dads are taller &stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. 4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. What does your Mom do in her spare time? 1. Mothers don't do spare time. 2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. What would it take to make your Mom perfect? 1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery. 2. Dye it. You know, her hair. I'd dye it, maybe blue. Ifyou could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be? 1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me. 3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on her back. ============================== THE MOMMY TEST I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter. She picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that. "Why?" my daughter asked. "Because it's been laying outside, you don't know where it's been, it's dirty and probably has germs" I replied. At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and asked, "Wow! How do you know all this stuff?" "Uh," ...I was thinking quickly, " All moms know this stuff. It's on the Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don't let you be a Mommy." We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently pondering this new information. "OH...I get it!" she beamed, "So if you don't pass the test you have to be the daddy." "Exactly" I replied back with a big smile on my face and joy in my heart.

Some of those were down right, laugh out loud, funny! Thanks for the chuckles and laughs.

Congratulations on your new your, 1st year, and new marriage. Hope all is going well.

You gotta do what ya gotta do! Every man (or woman) for himself. If I thought it would work in conjunction with my band, I'd try it, why not, I've tried everything else.

I guess it depends on the individual, I took it and it just made me regular, for the first time in my life, LOL.

Thanks for sharing your story, I wish you the very best, HUGS!

Ceira, please let us know how you're doing. Big hugs your way!

HUGS girl, I know with the band I'm struggling right now, I'd hate to imagine what I'd be doing without the band. You're so right, "NOTHING TASTE AS GOOD AS SKINNY FEELS!"

LEAVE THE HOUSE! I've found when I stay home for a day I eat far more junk than I would if I was out and about.

I was 54 when banded, my mom was 73, now 74. Erosion is not particular about age.

OH NO, I'm so sorry to hear of another erosion. Someone that knows how to do the bump thing may want to put this in the new section for complications section. Isn't that rather rare to have erosion so soon? I wish you a speedy recovery and thank you so much for letting us know. HUGS!

Lisa, even though Chris looks HOT in that black shirt and grey tie, you are going to get him a new pretty tie to go with that dress aren't you, LOL.

Mmmmmm that Johnson Baby Magic smell, I'm baby sitting today, thought about you Penni, I'll give mine an extra kiss on the head for you today.

Rene, be sure to get one of those fancy dangled scales that does the muscle vs fat ratio, that way IF you should have a slow loss, maybe you'll be able to attribute it to the muscle gain. JMO As for the burgers, bunless or not, the closest I've come to having a burger is a hamburger steak, yummmm. No taters for me either unless they're instant, can't fool this band. I keep thinking enough time has lapsed that it will be fooled with an occassional french fry from time to time, NOT, sure as I take a bite, PB everytime. My secretary fusses at me and says, "I don't know why you do that, you know you're going to end up in the bathroom", I just remind her I sign her check and she'd better get on back in her office, LMAO.

Adorable girls, show them anytime. I always enjoy pictures everyone shares. I think that's what makes LBT so friendly.

Paula, I was thinking the same thing, "Angelic", so adoreable. He's almost 1 month to the day younger than my newest gson. Not to steal your thread, but check out the cheeks on this boy: He was only 7.9, but it was all in his face, LOL. I hope you get your hands on him really soon, they're so soft, precious and innocent.

OMG, I actually laughed out loud. Thanks for sharing.

You're in great hands, the entire staff at Dr. T's office is the greatest.

OMG, you mean I'm at my sweet spot, I've been gassy for months, LOL. Not even a warning, just oops there it is.

I'm baaaaack! Hey everyone, what a week or two, finally hired someone, but it's still major work, all the interviews, and then training. It's much easier to do it myself, LOL. Beanie, where's the beautiful face? I feel like you're peeping, LOL. Soon to be fellow bander,:clap2: . Dianne, I'm so sorry to hear you have to redo everything. Personally, I think we should all have to have our fills under flouro, what's to prevent us from getting a puncture without it. I especially think we should have a flouro check at least at the end of year one. As for the NJ trip, are you driving or flying? If you're driving, you've got to pass my way, either stop by or I'll meet you at my beach house in Nags Head, I'd love to meet you, heck if you're flying, maybe I'll meet you there. My doctor told another patient he did a flouro on a male patient last week and his stomach had stretched around the top of his band , not a good thing, I worry that I'll either get the puncture or maybe my band has stretched. I know no two days are the same with this band. I was suppose to go for a fill Friday, but pb'd all day Thursday, maybe it was nerves/anxiety???? Needless to say, I cancelled the appt. Anne, Hope the kids are better. As for airports, they so intimidate me, from arriving, parking, and the attendants, especially large airports where we rent a car, OMG, that's even worse than just passing through or dealing with the local airport. Sherry, better get those meals in, especially a juicy hamburger with the bun for me, LOL. Cindy, sorry to hear you've been sick, hope you're all better, hugs. Betty, if they took you around to meet the supervisors, this sounds like it could be it!!!! I'll save the :clap2: until we know for sure. Betty, I saw that post about the "regular" Dannon yogurt, does it taste like yogurt? I hate the taste of dairy products. Ira, Patty, anyone I missed, I'll catchya later, have a great day, oops it's almost over, too late to get dressed now.

IF I didn't have that problem daily, I'd probably have a weight loss of some type. I use that powder fiber in my coffee everyday, it might work every 3rd or 4th day. I'm anxious for the xenical to hit the market so I can take that again, never helped me lose weight, but for once I was regular as clock work. (couldn't possibly make gas any worse than it is now, subject to happen at any given moment, prepared or not)

Hey, I'd tell her the truth, but then I haven't held back at all to anyone about my surgery. After all, how many people have the "guts" it takes to do what we've done, not to mention pay for it, LOL. Surgery, regardless of what kind is NOT the easy way out. Congratulations on being a roll model to your coworker.

Erin, Bless your heart, to go through so much and still lose the band, Errr! I wish you the best.

Please let us know how it goes, I'll be thinking about ya.

I don't feel pity or sorry for people heavier than me, I just wish I could tap them on the shoulder and share my lapband experience with them and maybe it would lighten their load. We all have to take our own steps to help ourselves.