juny

This is completely normal. You are ok. And you made the greatest decision for yourself. The surgery will absolutely help you get to a physical comfort zone- but this surgery was not performed in your head. You are on the right path seeing a therapist. I myself see a behavior therapist, i go to weight loss surgery support group and also overeaters anonymous. That is 3 seperate places that I find help with this disorder for mental help. It is the complete key to success- it really is. Don't feel like a burden and don't wish that it is another time that it isn't. Jump into yourself right now. Take advantage of all the support out there. Find a weight loss surgery support group. You are ok.

Hi, Juny. I know exactly what you mean. At my pre-op class they shared a list of reasons why not to have this surgery, and I was like, "oh, crap... that was my list of why I wanted to have this surgery." You know what, though, I happen to think some of those reasons are perfectly valid, and have their roots in the right reasons. One of the items on the not a good reason list was "Because I want a boyfriend." Hell yeah I want a boyfriend, and then a husband, and then a family of my own. I know why they say not to make this your reason. It's because they have no control of your personality, and there's a chance you're just a horrible person or totally undateable, and surgery won't change that. If you're unsatisfied with your ability to get a boyfriend post-op, then it can lead to feelings of defeat, and that can lead to slipping in your meal plan, etc. I think for the fully informed, though, this is a great reason to want surgery. We're not fools. We know results are not guaranteed and and that losing weight doesn't magically reveal the number of your future spouse underneath a roll of fat or something. I had this surgery because I want my life, I want my happiness, and the only way to have access to the possibility of those things is to have my health. I'm not going to lie to myself. If I knew I could eat brownies and pasta every day and still have everything I want, plus feel great in my body, plus not be in pain, plus not be inviting a plethora of health issues, I'd be face down in it every day. However, tragically, that is not the case, so I choose this. Health is the answer to my happiness and fulfullment of desires in my life, and so I choose health.
Regarding goal weight, I feel the same. I picked a random number, and that number is higher than the chart tells me my ideal weight based on my height. I did this for a few reasons. First, I'm certain I'll have excess skin to contend with, which will weigh something. Second, I think I must be more dense than other people. I don't look as large as other people at my weight. Third, the number isn't going to matter to me. How I feel and how I look are the goals. I feel guilty sometimes, because I can't really picture losing all the weight. I would thrilled if I lost enough weight to be one of those beautiful curvy, voluptuous women like Christina Hendricks, or Adele. Do I think I'll actually look like that? Not so much, but my point is, if I get to a manageable where I can dress cute, and my health stats classify me as healthy, I will consider myself at my personal goal.
I went through and read your blog entries and some of your posts. How do I say this without sounding like a weirdo? I really like you. You just seem cool and like someone I'd be friends with in real life. I relate to your thought processes, we're near the same age (I'm 33) and place in life, and you're intelligent. I tossed you a friend request. I'd enjoy keeping up with your journey as we go through this.

I was also sleeved Dec 5th, and had many of the same worries that you do. I have found that I don't miss soda and such, now, I am able to take a decent swallow of clear fluids with no problems. I am on pureed/soft foods, and have tried many many things. If you are following what the doctor/NUT recommends and chew, chew, chew, I have found in my experience that I don't 'need' a drink with my food because my mouth has moistened it plenty to swallow...it wasn't easy the first two weeks to remember to stop drinking so I could actually try full liquids, but now I think I'm close to having the hang of that.
It gets easier once you get further out and start listening to your body...which is definitely a part that I had turned off when binging...
My doctor is a 'balanced' diet type, and only advises to get protein first, then veggies then carbs, and I find when I do that, I almost never have room for the carbs, and not always veggies even at this far out (2 oz at a time doesn't leave for much).
It DOES get easier!!!! Keep your head up, your fears are totally normal at this stage, but it does eventually turn out just fine.
Hugs and you will rock your sleeve!

I can imagine how obvious other peoples eating habits become when you're sitting there trying to curb your own. You did great! It'll get easier. At New Year's you'll look fantastic and it'll be the start of a fantastic year for you!

Nope, don't have a date, my 6th visit was on the 15th and my letter of necessity is supposed to be in the mail. I'm hoping for a December date but more likely will be in January. Mildly disappointed w/ that since i've got limited pto.
Staying w/in my calorie allowance is so hard, it's one of the primary reasons I'm getting this done. Even when i'm eating healthy, i have real problems w/ quantity.
do you have a date yet?

i'm preop...no i seriously would not have done this post op. I've either been very good or very bad, just wholely inconsistent w/ my diet, it's frustrating. I've been screwing around w/ the same 5lbs for 3 months. i have a really bad week, like 2500+ calories then 3 weeks of coming off that and trying to be good.
Some days i'm just so tired of being good and then i have a little bit and a little bit more and a little bit more and then the pan was gone. it was a single batch of betty crocker fudgy brownies. like 3/4 of a cup of oil in those suckers...wtf was i thinking.

As i wrote it, I was coming to the decision that tax season wasn't going to happen for me. I'm looking at other avenues now. AARP offers free tax returns for low income and retirees. I volunteered there before and really enjoyed it. I might do that again since it really doesn't require anything like the effort of a part time job. I'm feeling better about my choices. I'm going to be fine. It's funny how after these appointments I go a little to pieces every time, just to have to remind myself that I'm fine and I need to move on.

Yes they have a monthly thing going at the hospital, I've just got to get myself there is all. Thanks for well wishes

Yes they have a monthly thing going at the hospital, I've just got to get myself there is all. Thanks for well wishes

So lighten up the calories in that hamburger- make it with 1/2 very lean ground turkey, add some finely chopped veggies to it, etc to make it seem just as filling but have less calories and fat. Play with your food and figure out how to convince your body that you're getting the volume without all the calories. The more you can break this food addiction now, the better you will do post-op.
I'm a volume girl (or was) so I understand. I'm glad I didn't have to wait the 6 months (I did my surgery privately) because I think I would have gone crazy. The 9 day cold-turkey, protein shake & sugar free liquids only diet was a b*tch. But, I made it and now I'm on the other side.
Good luck to you.

I just wanted to leave you some love. I'm so sorry you are going through all of this. Stupid cancer.

All I can say is I wish I had had the presence of mind to have WLS when I was 30 (although I don't think the sleeve was available then...). But it would have saved me almost a decade of self loathing. I finally realized I only have ONE life on this planet (that I'm aware of), and I don't want to waste any more time. Kudos to you for coming to that conclusion when you did. Others may not understand, but as long as YOU know what and why you're doing what you're doing, it's all good!