juny

I have sinus issues as well. I tried this neti pot, it doesn't work for me. i tip in the water and it just sits there...it doesn't drain out the other side. Then I get this sloshy feeling in the front of my face. I guess my problem is more congestion that a runniness(?). Hope you have better luck. Love your blog

I dont think I could have same surgery w/ the same surgeon if i saw my dad end up like that. My surgeon has said twice in about 3000+ surgeries that he's done, he's had to convert from a sleeve to a bypass. It sounds like that's what you dad might be heading for. I hope he gets better, I think what he's going through is what I'm worried about for myself. I'm not worried about dying (weird yes i know). I'm REALLY worried about the in between, it's not life and it's not dead..

i tried the lemonade today as well. the face i made was just like the one i get when I drink vodka....that one is a no go.

i'd like to fit in the freakin airplane seat. oh and a massage....i have this thing about people touching me because i'm so uncomfortable w/ myself. after i get near my goal weight...yeah..full spa..oh boy. maybe w/ a hot guy who speaks broken english and the waterpark...and the amusement park....and the list just goes on and on and on and on!

I got the denial letter today from aetna. They said I couldn't prove that I was fat for 2 consecutive years. And I didn't meet the nutritional program guidelines that they require for six month. It's surprising that I'm disappointed. I knew it was probable, i read the terms of the health insurance when I got my new job. Still i was surprised that they think i wasn't fat for 2 years consecutively. I'm sure it will all get sorted, my nurses said they only sent the letter because the people on the phone couldn't figure out if my plan included wls coverage. Oh well. I worked out today even thought I didn't want to. It's so hot here, it's not supposed to be this hot til august!

I've hit it again. That wall where I'm tired of the dieting, tired of counting calories, tired of being hungry. This is always the place where I start slipping back into habits like...oh a plate of chocolate chip cookies. which sounds FABULOUS right now. Went to the nut. on Monday. They're all really pleased, said the 14lbs I lost in about 7 weeks was wonderful and I should be so pleased....not as pleased as a plate of cookies would make me about now. Nurse said I had a blood pressure that people would kill for. I think this is the part of the journey that just sucks and I have to push through. On a happier note, i really like going to the gym after work. I got 3 times a week, looking at working up to maybe 4 days or making the days I go a little longer. I still can't/won't go above 2.5-2.7mph but I'm up to a 5% incline. i found an online treadmill calculator that actually includes the incline. Myfitnesspal kind of sucks how all they got it a 2.5 leisurely pace, I sweat like a stuck pig, I don't call that leisurely. 400 calories in a half hour and it's a great transition to being home. Overall, I really can't complain. Just keepin' it moving.

I know I'm reviving an old board but in the hopes of reducing the number of threads i figured i'd ask here. I started my job as a temp from another firm. They made me permanent on 4/2/12. My plan is to have surgery in or around November. So I figure the first six months i worked here are out of bounds. However, people keep talking about 1 year at the job OR 1250 hours. I think I may just get in the 1250 hours by October. Does this mean I may qualify or does it not matter since I've not met the year to date requirement?

I think it might have something to do w/ when we were fat. Some people have been thin throughout childhood into young adulthood. I've noticed those people tend to feel more like themselves the more weight they lose, like they're getting back to the person they knew. For people like me, who have always been big since the age of 10 or so, we don't really have a concept of what we're supposed to look like w/ all the weight off. I'm 30, I've never actually seen what my face or waist or legs or any other part of my body is supposed to look like w/o a few inches of fat attached. I think for me, I'm guessing for others, it's a different person coming out of this journey, and I'm not really sure what that's supposed to mean. I think our brains just fill in the blanks of what we expect to see only the math isn't adding up.

So I've hit the 6 week mark on the diet and here I am not following through on my own plans. I've lost a bit of weight but for whatever reason, this weekend I've gone off the rails again. This is always where it happens. The weight stalls and I get sick of looking at my body fiddling around w/ the same 3 pounds for a few weeks. Skipped lunch. Didn't wait for dinner had a cup of oberweiss chocolate milk (its a regional thing, they come in the old glass bottles, hormone free, all the good stuff....) and ate half a pb&j (i made strawberry jam this weekend). I know I'm being ridiculous. I think this is the part where I once again realize I need this surgery to stop being famished. I also need to get myself back on track. ok...i think it's safe to turn off my vent now.

The day I went to the seminar was the last day I had diet coke. I drank only pop for more than 20years....which just makes me feel old atm.... I've not really noticed a huge change. I mean I hear about everyone else losing weight or better skin...i got nada. But I'm ok w/ it surprisingly. I knew if I couldn't kick this habit the weight issue wasn't ever going to be resolved. I'm overall happy w/ my choice. i do miss it. and when my family asks me to pass them a pop sometimes I smell it just to remind myself of how it used to be lol. I can tell how old a pop is just by sniffing the open can, not sure if that's just being weird or if it's an acquired ability

thanks for the encouragement. I was back on form today. i'm feeling better and working out and drinking my water. I can't always control myself w/ food. I figure this is how i got into this in the first place, but I'm getting through.

i think doubt is a natural part of all this. I wish you the best.

Parental stuff can suck. I think it's great that you're learning how his choice doesn't have to be your choice. I know how hard it is to do something that goes against what your parents want. This is all just a part of the process, a lot of this process sucks but in the end there's nothing better than getting stronger in who you are on the other side.

Hi, can't say that I'm going there sorry. I'm going to Dr. Cahill in Dyer, it's sorta close. I'm still jumping through hoops and will be getting (hopefully) surgery in November. Best of luck

they might make a good sauce? I don't really consider them really tough foods like...say chicken. I mean when sliced they're fairly mushy. I bet you have a fair chance, you probably just won't be able to eat a lot of them. Post surgery folk would know better.

I'm only a couple months in, originally I was disappointed at the amount of time it was going to take for me to get the surgery. I've come to realize how much of a change this is going to be and how helpful it is to have this window of time to get my head around the idea of what i'm doing. Start w/ small steps. Make sure you get your Water in for the day, don't drink during meals (or try not to, this is surprisingly difficult for me) and start an exercise regimen. Even if it's just walking, it'll get you prepared w/ the habits and tools that you're going to need once you've had the surgery. best of luck

I'm tired today. I just finished with yet another dr.'s visit and I'm about sick of all of it already. My first foray into this whole weigh loss surgery deal has been somewhat unexpected. For years, I did not consider surgery. I've been around 300lbs give or take 25lbs for the last 5 years. I've been pretty stubborn about the fact that the surgery doesn't change the habits you need to live w/ in order to make permanent change. However, I'm also SERIOUSLY tired of carrying around a whole other person, it's not even a baby, it's like a full sized adult that never bother going to college and doesn't pay rent but eats me out of house! It was back in March that I first had the thought, it was after a good 18 months of trying diet after diet. I just turned 30 in April. I came to the realization that I know the trajectory I'm on and if I want to end this unhappy merry-go-round, I'm going to have to do something more permanent. Which brings me back to doctors....I still have 2 different appointments at least for testing. I also have an appointment w/ the nut. and a psych and a gp all in the next 2 weeks. The doctor's office I left today has recommended I go back to an endocrinologist because after not being on synthroid for 2 months (yes I know i'm a bad girl....i went from no insurance to nice insurance in 2 months....can we just let me get past the guilt trip please?). Apparently my tsh is 97.3, he's not happy, he says he only sees that in people who haven't taken meds for years.....I find this difficult to believe. This winding little path I've just taken us on leads to my crankiness about going to yet another doctor. Yes I know it's necessary. Yes I know this is just a part of the deal. But for whatever reason I'm not scared of the surgery or the liquid diets, the hair loss, the lactose intolerance or anything else (not yet anyway). What is totally consuming me at the moment, is the worry about trying to keep my pto up. I get exactly 80 hours pto. So two weeks. And all these dr. visits are going to eventually take some of that. And I'll still need it for surgery. Since I technically just started this job (actually been there as a temp since Oct) I won't qualify for FMLA until next year. I'm already putting resumes out....yeah that's another story. Ok......ok now I'm starting to come down from my vent...whoooo ok. I'd also like to take this space to mention that I'm at home w/ my parents right now since the job doesn't really pay enough to be on my own. While there are some excellent reasons to be living at home, ie no drunk ass roommates, free rent, free car, etc....once I've made it clear my intention to do this thing my family has been less than enthusiastic in their support. This is difficult to live w/ on a daily basis because I need to talk about these things and when I do at home I don't get the reaction I'd like and it's just more friction. I am serious about this and I don't think I'm going to change my mind, even w/ all the scary **** in these forums. I've found it a little easier to take on the changes my nut.'s asked me to, I think it's because I know this time I'm not just staring at a big empty void of failure. I don't think it's magical but I do think it would help with the obsession my mind has w/ being full. This lifestyle I'm starting, I hope and believe will continue and the surgery will make it more likely to be permanent. So I started changing things. After the first seminar I went to in April I haven't had any diet coke. This is huge, diet coke was all I drank...ever...I knew if I couldn't do that then the surgery would never be a go anyway. Today, it's straight water...every day and I'm surprisingly ok w/ that. I've also started going to the gym and gotten back into counting calories. I know I'm on the right track or at least i can see it from my house. Needless to say there's a whole lot on my mind. I've been obsessive about the forums of late, it's been wonderful looking at everyone's progress and that everyone's been extraordinarily helpful when anyone has a question. And now since my brain's just about exploded in every direction it's possible to go in, I think it's time to get my broom and dust pan.

Have you tried biotin?

Saw the psychologist for this appointment. Felt pretty good about it in the end. I asked him about what he saw the most. He said the most problems he sees are untreated depression and unrealistic expectations. He feels I'll do well. That makes one of us. I'm worried still about self sabotage. I don't know about anyone else. For me though, the start of a diet goes ok. I'm on track counting calories/points/carbs/protein/etc. Then when the weight loss slows down, I push it. I lower my calories, I up my time at the gym. After a couple weeks of this, one of two things can happen. Either I get hurt and have to take off time from the gym which wrecks the whole "being good" thing. Or I'll get ragged and by the end have no energy left and I get pissed that what I've done hasn't worked...again. While the family goes and gets themselves dairy queens. I really don't know what it feels like to have the effort actually pay off. The idea is so pie in the sky right now. I have 2 tests left, the upper gi and the stress test. I have an appt w/ my nut. on the 25th. Just trying to keep my head down and do the program I'm on. Next step is to figure out the vitamin/protein thing.

I told my mom, 2 best friends, and my god mother. I'm trying to keep it that way. I'm not telling my dad because he can't be trusted to keep his mouth shut. I'm staying w/ my parents right now and that's going to make things tricky but the alternative is worse. I'm also determined not to tell people at work. Still trying to figure out what to tell them when I take off 2 weeks at once.

I can totally relate. When they told me 6 months, I balked. After I thought about it, I realized it was a tremendous opportunity to get myself into the mindset I knew I'd have to be in to make this work.

I felt the same way. I totally crashed when I got to the doctors office though. I know I need to write stuff down and ask questions but when he came in i swear to God whatever was going on upstairs, just leaked out of my ear and I think I just stared stupidly at him for 10 minutes.... sigh.

Grats on getting closer to the goal!

I'm still in the testing and program phase of getting this procedure done. While I'm worried about the surgery, i'm more concerned w/ the amount of time it will take to heal. I've only got 2 weeks vacation time I can take and I"m hoping to get the procedure done somewhere around thanksgiving or christmas to sort of lengthen the amount of time I can take off work. I'm worried that i have a complication I'll be shooting myself in the foot with my job. I work at a computer but I"m up and down throughout the day. it makes me wonder if i'm doing the right thing now or if i should wait, my heart keeps telling me that I really can't wait and my brain keeps saying another year and I'll have more 3 weeks pto instead and wouldn't that be better. I feel for anyone who's already at the bridge...i'm still just looking at it like hmmmm.....

well my 2 cents is to add what my dr and his nurses told me. lapbands help w/ making you feel fuller faster but eventually the food does move through the system, and you tend to still have around 2 hours til your next meal and you still have that hunger. for me this isn't an option because i keep chasing the full feeling. theres more ways to cheat as well, earlier on at least, anything mushy, like ice cream or cream sauces pass through more quickly, leaving you w/ larger calories consumed and you hungry more often. there are a number of people out there that gained weight after the band because of things like that. There are people who work the band really well though. the most important thing is to do what feels right for you. i thought i'd be a lapband girl for sure. but after doing my own research. i came to the conclusion that it wasn't going to be enough for me. and while i've been told lapbands are permanent, my own observations tell me that this isn't really the case a fair amount of the time. you're going to have skin if you have a lot to lose. i know i will. its one of the scars of what we do to ourselves. for me, my skin issues are at the very bottom of my concerns, i'll just cross that bridge when i get there. i wish you the best, and good luck -edit. oh yeah and the fills can cost anywhere between $200-$300 per fill and you need about 4 in the first year i'm told. while the lapband is a cheaper investment to begin w/ the price continues potentially long after the first year.