Angelmom

Dr,. Oz had a good black beak brownie recipe on his show, last year...maybe you could try and find it.

ok...maybe i misunderstood. ty.

Did they have to do some kind of test?

I posted once in the blog I started here, and now I cannot find how to do it again...this site is not well set-up in some areas. Seems like you are doing well....you talk to your ex?

13 hours!!!! What for? 2 days? Isn't 2 days long enough for a sandwich to be out of a stomache? I'm worried now....do I have something to worry about? Oh geez.

I bet you would make a super friend, one that I would like to have. I really liked your post. When I tried OA, everyone sat around crying, and I was so emotional over the trauma in my life, that I coudn't stand to be there. I truly believe that you will lose the weight, just as I will, though I understand the fear. Are you allowed to eat eggs so soon?

How are you doing, Bettyanne? My surgery is on Thursday. I had some food throughout the last 2 weeks, but the rest of the time stuck to my diet...and now there will not be any cheating whatsoever. A couple times I thought I might pass out if I didnt' eat, and my son had been away for a few weeks...so i had a little bit of a cheat day with him and my girl...felt i needed that to be able to move forward....and I had been broke while he was gone, so I couldn't do a thing...the timing has all stunk. So, how are you? I know how it can feel lonely sometimes....and when my children--son--is driving me nuts, life with a pre-op diet gets hard.

We all struggle with the pre-op diet...any "normal" person would...even those people who do not suffer with food issues. I know we are not supposed to eat food...but I thought I read somewhere that as long as you are losing weight, and not holding onto digested food...you are shrinking your liver. Does the liver still shrink when one is on a liquid pre-op diet, and has some food...as long as the person is in weight loss mode?

What I'm getting at is that I am on the pre-op liquid diet, and have HAD to eat a couple times, as well as chose to for some other reasons...and I'm still losing weight...and struggling--although not as much...and I wondered if you mostly cut solids and stick to the liquid protein stuff, have eaten foods, and are still losing weight, does the liver still shrink the same. And, does simply losing weight while eating less cause the liver to shrink the same way? It's a very intersting topic, and I found a webpage that talked about lier health...still doesn't answer all the questions i have, but it's good. Here's the link, if anyone is interested. http://www.wellnessresources.com/weight/articles/unclog_your_liver_lose_your_abdominal_fat_leptin_diet_weight_loss_challenge/

I agree with the above posters for the most part. I am always honest with my children so that they understand the world and life better. My twins always handle things with finesse! I'm amazed how children are much smarter than for what they are given credit. The only concern I can see for some children is that they might develop a fear of doctors if they know mom is hurt when she comes back from one. To prevent that, I would explain that I want to be a healthier mommy and that I want to get help from the doctors, and that I will have a sore tummy for a while and won't be able to eat as much...etc....and if you notice any kind of worry...just tell them that sometimes good things don't feel the best, but that they are really good to have done, and that you are brave and ok about it. Maybe that will help.

I plan to see mine...and get a picture if possible.

I can say that I am terrified of causing a problem post-op. The pre-op liquid diet is one that I do not truly believe is fully necessary, because I have seen so many variations, and even no diet required for some people. Today I had only 550 calories, though I got my protein in, and I thought I was going to pass out, so I had some food. I'm 6 days out and counting...so I hope I'm going to be ok. If they have to close me up, they have to close me up and I'll keep trying, but I doubt that will happen because 90% of the time or greater, I am on liquids.

Thank you for trhe lift up...I really need to see things differently...something has to give, and I want that give to be permanent. Weird thing is, I used to play so many sports...and I always had these struggles...and I work out now at a much lower level --due to the arthritis and cartilage problems from all the sports--twice a day, sometimes once a day, sometimes more if I am very stressed out. You would think that someone like me would be slim...but it just isn't so. I do have muscles, though. How are you doing since your procedure? Are you able to eat anything? The thoughts of being put under scare me...How was that for you? Cindi

I hope this thing works....the whole site takes so long to upload, it's ridiculous. I neve thought I'd see the day when I had a blog. The word "blog" is even weird. I decided to try and chronicle some of how I feel and what I experience as I move forward with the sleeve process. Today, while at the JCPenney store, in the dressing room, I was trying on bras. While I waited for my daughter who was in the next stall to finish up, I sat down on the little square bench that was in there, and I glanced over and saw myself in the mirror. I could not believe what I saw! How the hell did I get to be so fat!? My belly was drooping down onto the chair in front of me, and my rear was sticking out, while my belly looks like a giant beach ball. Normally, I know that my chest is ample...but in the mirror, my chest looked small, as the rest of me is enormous! How disappointing! I never really see myself as large...just bigger, and that I must wear bigger sizes...but that I'm ok...but really I'm not...and I have rarely seen my reality. I have not seen things for what they are...but I sure see it now. On occasion I see it, but not for long. Today I saw it so much, that my desires to eat plumetted and all day I have not really had the massive temptation to stray from my pre-op diet...which is a welcome change. I feel motivated. The smells of certain foods cooking has been driving me nuts...but I remove myself from it and work on it. I am so embarrassed...much more than usual....that I walked around with about 30 more pounds on me than what I have now! I don't even want to be seen in public...or in my own house, for that matter. I think the trick is to hold in our conscious mind, the truth...what was, what is, and what will be...and what will be if we don't change what is! I will never quit, and will always work to change for the better...and to see me for me...for what is.

What do you think...ride home in a Chevy Venture, or Hyundai Elantra? What was most comfortable to you?

Thank!. Were you feeling out of it on the way home?...in pain? ...did you find it hard to get up off a couch or chair?

I forgot to add that I also have the allergies in my eyes...one minute they are itching and watering, the next minute they are dry and burning...or watering and burning...it's crazy. I went to the eye doctor when my eyes were so bad that I woke up in pain with severe redness and blisters on my conjuntiva. The doctor prescribed Zatador allergy eye drops...they are not like Visine that can cause you to have a sort of permanent problem where your capilaries in your eyes sort of stay red and lined. Zatador works on the antihistimine receptors, to block them from becoming activated, thereby stopping allergic responses...for several hours. I use mine once per day when my eyes are itching, and there are no side effects like what can happen with Visine use. Finally, the doctor prescribed Restasis for the dry burning feeling I get that goes along with the other problems. Apparently my tears evaporate faster than other peoples' tears. The Restasis really does work, so that I don't have to use the other drops as much....I also use Refresh Liquigel. Works like a charm...especially if you roll it in your hands and warm it up a little. Both Zatador and Restasis burn a little and I follow them up with the Liquigel...really makes my allergy eyes a whole lot better. The thing about the drops...all of them is that they can be expensive, so I really try to use just one drop and not let any run down my face....something to keep in mind. Zatador runs around $13 a bottle; Liquigel about $8 or so--lasts quite a while, actually; Restasis is prescription, so I just have a copay. Restasis comes in vials. I open one and use a drop in each eye per day, and I set the tube in a clean spot and use it the next day as well....supposed to use it 2x per day but usually just remember once. The eye doctor

Your allergist should have given you a lung test, and perhaps the Advair inhaler. I have asthma and allergies, and had a cough for a year that I finally figured out was all allergic related. I also use nasal spray...flonase works nicely. It makes me cough more for a bit, and then clears me up. It took a month or so for me to really feel 95% cough free, but those two meds made a huge difference. I also use Ventolin before exercise, and if a flareup occurs. I am supposed to start allergy shots, but am going to wait until after my surgery (Sept 6) to do that. I am supposed to take Ceterzine for the allergies also, but with the surgery coming up, I have been avoiding taking any pills so that I don't run extra risks of problems. You can try a daily allergy pill too. I am kind of poor, and have to shop in places like Salvation Army and Goodwill Industries...but they are absolutely filthy places. I can't really go in there, but have to...so I try to limit my exposure, and take an allergy pill beforehand, which really helps. Dog and cat urine and saliva are everywhere, and it's hurting many of us...people who own animals bring them everywhere, as well, and that hurts many of us...they don't care. That is one of the biggest culprits for 25 million of us who suffer from these people's animals. Add to that smokers--huge problem....and ragweed, dust, and other stuff, and we really feel sick all the time. It's a real pain...and really horrible that offenders do not seem to give a care about us. Stand your ground. Whatever makes you sick...tell the person to stop, and that it hurts you...eventually, if we can get even 1 million of the more than 25 million of us to take a stand, the world ill get better for all of us. Hope you feel better....go back to your allergist who should be able to take care of all of these things...at least help you get rid of the cough...if your allergist does not do that...find someone else.

My procedure was set and cancelled several times. Several times I started full liquid diet and fell off for a few days when they got cancelled. I picked myself back up and continued with Protein shakes about 35% of the time...up to 50% of the time since May 2012. This month, I have been more broke than usual, and had planned to eat out a bit with the twins, in preparation for the pre-op diet...but I was unable to have enough money to do anything at all...we're lucky to have toilet paper and milk...truly. So, knowing my 14 day diet was here, and that I felt a real need to have that free time to relax and not worry about Protein Shakes or anything a bit...I gave myself a cheat day on day 4...which was yesterday...and I was so stuffed that I could not sleep. We had chinese chicken and broccoli for lunch with egg rolls and those red chicken things on a stick....and then bbq chicken pizza at Knoebles park for dinner and during the evening....I felt absolutely horrible all night, and used metamucil and hot tea to clean myself out...and felt I did not have any desire to eat anything not on my pre-op diet. So...that brings us to the rest of today. I have been saving meals in the freezer for the children for the first week after my surgery. One thing I wanted that I could not afford was some KFC...and I decided to get some tonight and freeze much of it, to be baked for them for one meal or two when I am recovering...I ate chicken breast, some mashed potatoes with gravy, a few of those fries, half a buscuit and some corn muffin. Later on this evening, I had two relatively small cones with peach ice cream in them. Now I really feel stupid! I swore this very morning, and last night that I would not eat anything else...that I felt satisfied...and here i am doing the same damned thing! I am so disappointed in myself, and don't know if I can finish the preop diet when we never got to go to the drive-ins or do anything of a fun nature this summer. I have the emotions all over the place, ranging from happy to mostly miserable and trying to cope with the decision I made...etc. I am thinking of not going to the drive-ins this weekend since it will be 5-6 days pre-op and I don't think I can keep from eating what I want there, what I love there... I don't want to mess up my surgery, and I can live without a trip to the drive-in...but that is going to add to my misery--I wondered about this and expressed it at a support group meeting and the people there said they felt sorry for others who eat the garbage food, and that I won't want it...which helped me for a little while. I think once I have the surgery, it will be a lot easier...because I won't have a stomach much anymore, and because I am terrified of tearing my stomach apart and bleeding out, then dying on my children....I've really tried hard to deal with this all, and had planned to do the full liquid type diet since the beginning of August...but I just couldn't do it. What I need to know is if I don't have anymore of the wrong foods, is 8 days enough to shrink my liver and not have a problem during surgery?? By eating what I ate above, did I ruin my pre-op program?? I am also having PMS issues that I have not had in a while, as well...and I read that's normal...sucks, but it's normal. I was thinking of doing 3 days of Clear liquids only right before the surgery, and shakes leading up to that point. Do you think I'm ok???

Thank you for the insights and encouragement. Maybe my liver isn't as bad off as it used to be because I have done the liquid diets all the way a few times for several days and kept with partials for several months...and now am doing it again. I do not want to be turned away, either...especially since my date has been changed so many times. That's unfathomable to me.

I appreciate the help and advice...I do have to say that I did not eat a lot for the most part...just later on the cheat day that I planned...just wish I would have had less...after not eating much or at all...having actual food was a lot for my body to take. I strongly feel that I need to feel not cheated in order to move forward...and that's why I had the cheat day...to get the right frame of mind...but then I worry at the same time. I know many people have no real pre-op diet, or they can eat food...and so I figured a cheat day would be ok enough as long as I stuck with very low calorie and 95% pre-op diet the rest of the time. I do feel a lot better now, and a lot more confident, today. I so don't want to mess things up. I sure do hope I do the right things after the procedure...and I believe I will...but I still need counseling, and am going to get it for as long as I can. I want to be different on the inside, more than anything on the outside phases me. In fact, I don't really see that much of a problem with having extra weight as far as finding clothes that are comfortable and that fit...I can make clothes too...I never really see myself as the size that I actually am...and I want to see things for what they are, feel and think realistically about myself...without fear, and without a voice or drive that pushes me to eat.

If I was you, I would get on their case and get the paperwork done asap...because the denials after you have a date are real killers....it's tough...and you'll likely backslide. My whole summer was kind of ruined over the while denial and appeal process...turned completely upside down. Get on their case, and make them explain to you why they are not sending it....laziness is no excuse.

Boy, that post was long...hopefully, helpful to someone...helped me to say it!

I have been having emotional tears and ups and downs and feel all over the place, and I haven't had the surgery either. I figured that fat and hormones were related...well I know they are and that fat stores the hormones....but hadn't thought of them as being released when fat burns. That makes sense. Back in May/June, I was dieting, doing the liquid diet for days, and felt very down in the dumps and tired...depressed for about 5 days...I just kept doing what I know to be good to do to shake it off...it did shake off after 5 days....then I got the insurance denial, and though I planned to keep with the liquid diet through to the appeal surgery date--which I had no idea when it would be....I was unable...the emotions from the denial took over and I ate myself to a gain back of 15lbs. I still have a few more to go to get that back off...5 more. The roller coaster ride is tough. I had another surgery date of August 29th...which got changed to September 6th, and the same sort of thing happened with trying to do the liquid diet and the emotions, and I went back to eating. I figured I'd wait until the planned 14 day mark and dig in then...spare myself the torture anymore --of hoping for a sooner date from someone else cancelling or whatever. Once I had a solid date...Sept 6th...I decided I would eat out a bit and have a nice meal with my children when my son got back from his scout trips and things....but I was too broke to do anything of the kind. The emotions from being broke are tough to take especially when they severely mess up my pre-op plans! ugh...so that was emotional. Then I decided to allow myself a cheat day in the beginning of my 14 day pre-op diet since I had been having Protein shakes 30-50% of the time for months...but I didn't get the money until yesterday, so I had my day of fun with the children yesterday. NOW I feel settled....and based on the research I have done all the pre-op dieting is subjective...and I don't believe for a minute that one day is going to hurt me. I feel settled, and actually, after I ate, I could not sleep and felt like someone pumped my guts up with lead....I felt stuffed and aweful, perhaps from the big change from L to food...and as much food as I wanted. So now, I am trying to clean msyelf out and will not have anymore food for the rest of my time, and plan to go Clear liquids 3 days before the surgery to make up for what I ate yesterday...and for the little bit of food I had to cut the shakes down a bit during the first 3 days. My emotions have been all over the place, big time. I only have my 14 year old twins to help me, and they are on board. Anytime I need a hug, they line up to hug me...and if I need a little space, I ask for it, and they give it to me. If they need something, I give it to them. My son keeps trying to feed me though...and I had to reprimand him a bit...now he hides the food behind his back to help me. A hug works wonders....if your family is walking on egg shells because of your emotions...just explain how you are feeling, that it's not their fault, and ask for hugs...I'm sure they 'll oblige...children will, anyway...men...I'm not sure about...never really had decent one in my life.

I guess from years of trying to diet, I had begun to bleed daily....so the doctor gave me an IUD that regulated my periods, although they went on for longer than the old 5 day routine...more like 7--9 days now. My surgery was to be August 29th..and got changed to September 6th....and this month, I have resumed daily bleeding since my cycle came and I have not stopped since. I was starting to think the IUD was spent or faltering...but now I think my body is catching up with reality...just like my mind is. I've been planning for this for years, and now it's here...and I wonder if that plays a part...maybe the body is trying to cleanse itself. Maybe the lack of calories is the problem since fat and hormones go together and there is far less fat. Although, I allowed myself the cheat day I could not get since the beginning of the month because I did not have enough money...and that meant more calories and fat...but still beeding--a little more even. Gyn visit tomorrow should bring more clarity. How does one wipe anything down there after the procedure? Is it hard to reach? One woman said her husband had to clean her up...I don't have a husband...just young teenagers...can't have them do that...no way.