Lyra

So for the past few months I've been making pretty good food choices as I figured that since I was going forward with this surgery I should start changing my eating habits sooner rather than later. I do protein shakes (I actually rather like them!), and a veggie/fruit/nut/dairy smoothie thats delicious and healthy. My body feels like it's running better and I have more energy since I've started actually acknowledging a need for a more healthy and varied diet.
 
As I said above, I've been pretty good the last few months, but today I decided, "What the hell" and answered my craving for a Burger King Whopper Junior and fries. Plus soda, which I almost never drink. I figured having one fast food meal every now and then is no biggie, right? WRONG! My insides feel like they want to be outside and I dont think my gallbladder will ever forgive me. Uck. I also feel just plain ol' yuckie.
 
So with my intestinal discomfort, why am I kinda happy, you ask? Because whilst I was consuming calorie and fat ladden foods I realized that it just didn't taste as good as it used to. It tasted...well...fatty and super processed. Fake. One shaky step up from fillet a la cardboard. Frankly it disgusted me and I have absolutely NO desire to eat that crap again. Healthy, tasty, natural foods are addictive and your taste buds do change over time. My revelation was kinda surprising and very welcome!
 
Not bad for a pre-sleever, huh?

So for the past few months I've been making pretty good food choices as I figured that since I was going forward with this surgery I should start changing my eating habits sooner rather than later. I do protein shakes (I actually rather like them!), and a veggie/fruit/nut/dairy smoothie thats delicious and healthy. My body feels like it's running better and I have more energy since I've started actually acknowledging a need for a more healthy and varied diet.
 
As I said above, I've been pretty good the last few months, but today I decided, "What the hell" and answered my craving for a Burger King Whopper Junior and fries. Plus soda, which I almost never drink. I figured having one fast food meal every now and then is no biggie, right? WRONG! My insides feel like they want to be outside and I dont think my gallbladder will ever forgive me. Uck. I also feel just plain ol' yuckie.
 
So with my intestinal discomfort, why am I kinda happy, you ask? Because whilst I was consuming calorie and fat ladden foods I realized that it just didn't taste as good as it used to. It tasted...well...fatty and super processed. Fake. One shaky step up from fillet a la cardboard. Frankly it disgusted me and I have absolutely NO desire to eat that crap again. Healthy, tasty, natural foods are addictive and your taste buds do change over time. My revelation was kinda surprising and very welcome!
 
Not bad for a pre-sleever, huh?

So for the past few months I've been making pretty good food choices as I figured that since I was going forward with this surgery I should start changing my eating habits sooner rather than later. I do protein shakes (I actually rather like them!), and a veggie/fruit/nut/dairy smoothie thats delicious and healthy. My body feels like it's running better and I have more energy since I've started actually acknowledging a need for a more healthy and varied diet.
 
As I said above, I've been pretty good the last few months, but today I decided, "What the hell" and answered my craving for a Burger King Whopper Junior and fries. Plus soda, which I almost never drink. I figured having one fast food meal every now and then is no biggie, right? WRONG! My insides feel like they want to be outside and I dont think my gallbladder will ever forgive me. Uck. I also feel just plain ol' yuckie.
 
So with my intestinal discomfort, why am I kinda happy, you ask? Because whilst I was consuming calorie and fat ladden foods I realized that it just didn't taste as good as it used to. It tasted...well...fatty and super processed. Fake. One shaky step up from fillet a la cardboard. Frankly it disgusted me and I have absolutely NO desire to eat that crap again. Healthy, tasty, natural foods are addictive and your taste buds do change over time. My revelation was kinda surprising and very welcome!
 
Not bad for a pre-sleever, huh?

I can cross my legs!!!! I can cross my legs..like a WOMAN!! WHOOO-HOOOO! It does not look perfect,(as in.. back of knee is not, FLUSH against top of knee) BUT the fact that I'm capable to in any fashion, is AMAZING! Just had to share..Can't remember the last time I was able to <3

So my first VSG blog entry, how exciting! A chronicle of the minutiae of a pre-sleevers journey towards a new life...and oh how I want that new life. To excuse a bad pun, I want it so much that I can practically taste it. I figured even if I'm only talking to myself and sending these blogs out into the ether, then at least I can get how I feel on this journey down on paper. It may be interesting to look at a year from now and actually know what I felt and how I changed without the rose tinted glasses that time often gives our recollections. Or perhaps at the end of this journey, when I've met all my goals I will ceremoniously hit 'Delete'. *grin*.
 
Right now I'm a 29 years old woman, 5'5" ant 270 lbs, no kids, no SO, but with a ton of friends and a close family who are being (for the most part) very supportive. I do have a rather crazy cat, but I personally think she would be horrified at a reduction in cushy lap space. My deepest desires are to run marathons, complete Tough Mudders, join canine Search and Rescue, become a published writer, and to get married and have kids. I don't know about the other ladies out there, but I'm damned sick and tired of being "the girl with the hilarious personality" with the unspoken "too bad she's fat" tacked on the end. There is more to me than my weight and I finally reached the breaking point where I could give up and accept that my dreams would forever only be dreams...or I could take the bull by the horns, pull up my big-girl panties and figure out how to become a woman that can forge her own path. To that end I left a job that made me miserable, moved to a different state and now have a job and friends that make me smile and actually dance at work. As my dad found his courage to go through a surgery he was terrified of, I in turn found mine to take the next step.
 
To that end, my first bariatric doctor's appointment is Tuesday and I can't wait. I've been working hard at proper nutrition, weight lifting, yoga, and running to get my body in the best shape possible to tolerate surgery and to kick tail once I'm through it. I'm reading books to figure out why I eat what I do and how emotions dictate my eating. I'm calling it the three-pronged attack so that I am ready emotionally, mentally, and physically for what is to come.
 
Life is good, and with better health it can only get better!
 
Feeling Five by Five!
~Lyra
 
"Remember, Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did, but backwards and in high heels. "
~Faith Whittlesey

For someone who is known for finding the silver lining in any dark cloud, an eternal ray of optimism for her friends and family...I sure am a Debbie Downer when it comes to matters of self. I have been so negative, so hard on myself about this sleeve since I got it. Its as if i choose not to trust it, and have faith in our success together, in fear of failure. When it comes to weight loss, i think all of us VSGer's have come to know that feeling at some point in time. I've thought that its too good to be true..that im eating too much at one time, that my sleeve is stretching etc, etc. Im four weeks out, and as of monday i am down 18lbs since surgery. 28lbs since the start of the process. i should be celebrating that, instead of scrutinizing it. So tonight, I went into my bedroom, and pulled out the little clothes. Particularly, my work scrubs. I fought myself, thinking, "do you really want to do this to yourself?" "Your not going to fit in those things girl, you couldn't get that one pair of pants over your thighs!"
They ALL fit!!! I had two pairs, that i bought small. I wore them things like a second skin. I actually wore spanx with them!! LOL!! I was so mad that i didnt try them on at the uniform store, that i tortured myself, and made myself wear them to work anyways. I wore them twice..Once a pair. My weight was around 236 then..where i always would seem to get stuck. Let me tell you..they fit PERFECT!! Im soo stoked! I had other articles given to me, that never fit, and Im rocking them! Even the size Large Dickies pants that I couldn't get over my thighs..fit perfectly!
Im so excited..It was so awesome to actually see, and feel the results! for the first time! Im going to come back to this post, when i start with the doubting..and remember that this is for real. <3ing my sleve!

It seems like just yesterday I stumbled upon vertical sleeve talk and I became obsessed. I read all the blogs and looked at all the pics. Finally it was my time to have my surgery and it all became real. I thank those who prayed for me and those who emailed me to checkup on me. I am proud to say after five months that I am now 153lbs and I was 211lbs at the start of my journey. I know 211lbs may not seem like much but I am only 4"11 tall. The sleeve has transformed me from a size 18 to a size 10 and I feel great. Now I won't say it has all been peaches and ice cream cause that would be a lie. I have horrible heart burn after eating spicy food, I still can't drink alot at a time, and I wasn't prepared for the rapid diminishing of clothes in my closet that fit. I literally stood in my closet the other day and wanted to cry cause I couldn't find anything to wear to work. I didn't know if they were tears of joy or frustration. I can say one thing and that is I wouldn't change anything for the world. I often think when I was young I took my weight for granted and I treated my stomach like a trash can but now that i have been given a second chance, I think twice before I eat something. To all of those who are contemplating it Like Nike says "JUST DO IT"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!