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Everything posted by Marimaru
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If that doctor has the nerve to yell at you for not losing enough weight, tell him it was his damn fault that you needed that unfill in the first place! You are very forgiving. I'd have found another doctor and tried to bring up this guy on charges, lol. Hopefully he'll take it slow, so you don't have to go through that again!
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When were you banded? 7/2/04 What was your weight ON DAY OF SURGERY? 280 What is your weight now? 228~230 What size do you wear? 18 How tall are you? 5'6"
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Having Surgery August 26, nervous, mad and excited
Marimaru replied to j_war06's topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
Congratulations! Just think, if this surgery does all the things you want it too, it wont take long for you to be able to pay your family back. My mom paid for my surgery, and says she doesn't want to be paid back, but I fully intend on it, even if it means paying for a super cool vacation or something instead of actually giving her the money. It's really great that you can get this done, I'm very happy for you! Your mom could try appealing to the HR department of her business. If they pay for the surgery for you and then get the denial overturned some people are reimbursed for paying for it, instead of waiting. -
My place too! There's plenty to do at my place!!
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Well, Vines said it best. It is hard to remember that we went through major surgery. You've now got something in your stomach that the body has to get used to, and you have to get all that anesthesia out of your system. It's gonna take a little while to get back to normal, but you will.
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How has your relationship with food changed?
Marimaru replied to vinesqueen's topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
I somehow manage to miss some of the most profound threads when they are first formed. Fortunately, they stay forever, so I can catch, up, lol. I could not even tell you what I weighed when I was 7 or 8 and put on my first diet. Oddly though, I remember when the diet ended, my mom let me bake a cake and have as much of it as I wanted... and I ate half the damn thing. Other than that, I remember sitting in the kitchen with one of my sisters being told we had to finish what was on our plates while the parents and the other sister (which ever of the 2) went and watched TV, because we had messed around instead of eating during dinner time. I think that's where I got the whole "mostly silent during dinner because of face stuffing" thing. It's not necessary to clean you plate, they just thought that we'd been goofing off so much we didn't eat dinner but we'd want snacks later. Or maybe I'm wrong and it was necessary to clean the plate, I dunno. My dad had gone bankrupt in realestate, so we lost our 3 story house and our horses when I was 6. For some reason he never really picked back up, so my mom went to work, and was ALWAYS working. While at the time I was upset, I have a huge appreciation for this now. When she couldn't find work in Colorado where she lived, she found a company in California that was supposed to open a call center in Denver within a couple of months, but she could start working out there now and they'd put her in an apartment until the new place was done. A couple of months turned into more and more, and so she REALLY wasn't home much. Dad didn't work because he thought it was important that he be there when we get home from school and whatnot, and mom sent money home for the bills... but somehow the power/water/electric/telephone got shut off intermitently. Apparently he was spending the bill money to do fun things with us instead of paying the bills (the whole goodguy/badguy thing I guess). He ended up filing for divorce, and mom stayed in California permantently, and the custody battle ensued. Dad had me on diets most of the time. Most vividly I remember being on Slimfast at 12, being weighed and forced to write down what the scale said every day (165 burned more vividly in my brain), taking my stupid shake to school, drinking it and the spending all the money I had on the crap that they sell at schools these days. Mom finally won custody (the story of that is a long one, and has it's own issues in my brain, but not really related to food), and she didn't diet me. She didn't have alot of extra money, so there wasn't alot of extra snacks, and she cooked healthily. I probably maintained a 30 to 50 lbs overweight status for 5 years or so. I'm not sure if it was my eating, having a boyfriend who drove (instead of walking everywhere), or starting on Depo Provera that took me from a 14 to an 18 within two years. I just know I graduated as a size 18 (no clue what I weighed then), and first found out about the band at size 24, less than 5 years later. All of the above, to say that I think my relationship with food comes from fear of deprivation (we had the powdered milk thing too), and rebellion. I was a really good kid, didn't do drugs, didn't sneak out, but I had candy hidden away in my room. I used to buy and eat frosting, but would never do it if I thought people were going to see me. I can't have people seeing me do something a fat person would do, seeing as I'm not fat. Ha. And that's another thing. The denial monster had me trapped until probably 18 months ago. Sure, I need to lose a few lbs, but it wasn't that bad. I think I still had visions of my size 14 self or something. As to how the relationship has changed... first of all, I flat out refuse to hide my eating. That doesn't make me less defensive mind you. If I have a dish of ice cream and my boyfriend makes a joke about how I'm being "bad" I fly off on a tangent about how many calories I've had, and how many is in the ice cream and how it's okay to have things like this in moderation, etc, etc, when he really was just joking. He'll mention it sometimes if he thinks I'm going over board, but he does it because he knows how depressed I can get if the scale doesn't move, or if (god forbid) it shows an upward movement. I've also had a consious(sp) thought about wanting to eat something because I'm upset, when I can't because I've just had a meal and the band wont let me. Boy was I mad at myself for that one. Talk about your ultimate denial breaker right there. I still like volumn if I am eating something good, which has recently put me on the search for the low calorie, high volumn (band friendly) snacks, and that also has been a learning experience. I have no idea if the above thoughts are at all comprehensive, I started typing and a whole bunch of stuff came out, but I'm sure it equals something -
Those are really all fantastic, and it's cool to see them all in one place. I've kept a journal of sorts on another site where I've been trying to keep mine. I may have a little updating to do as well now . Having them all in one place is a great idea.. and you have so many!
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So as to prove I've not been slacking, I thought I'd post something. It's not finished, but I need input on part of it as asked in my last post I'm not sure about the face yet, and I don't think my drawing does her hair justice... Oh, and I'm not so good with the feets...
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I would recommend trying the larger band, with some investigation as to why he didn't choose it in the firstplace? I hope that she feels better soon no matter which way she decides to go.
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Overnight Hospital Stay...
Marimaru replied to Oh 2 Be Free's topic in Weight Loss Surgeons & Hospitals
The center I went to gave me a private room with an extra bed for whoever came with me. -
Congrats! Hope your flight home is also uneventful
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I weigh every day, usually twice. Once in the morning before I get dressed, and once sometime in the evening. I don't know why in the evening, I know that it will be up, because I've consumed things during the day, but I do it anyway. I also had gotten to a point where I measured my waist nearly every day (when I was stuck and not losing, and not changing shape). I finally broke that one though, but I'm still on the scale twice a day. I've had 2 scales go out on me and each time I bought a new one the very same day, so I don't think it would work to have my boyfriend toss it. I do want to get one of the ones that does body fat % though at some point. Right now I just have a cheapo analog scale.
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Sounds like gas to me. I'm so glad you are feeling better!
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Please--need Kick In The #@*!!!
Marimaru replied to Mariposa Bella's topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
Estela, Give yourself a little elbow room. You've done fanstastic so far, and you will continue to do so. You probably DO need the extra nutrition right now, and what you ate wasn't all that bad. Subway is a great healthy lunch, and one donut (in how long???) isn't going to hurt you. Riddle me this; what would your Subway sandwich and your donut have been preband?!?! I'd have had a footlong with all the fatty condiments, a bag of chips, a huge drink, and probably 2 donuts (at least). Whenever I "do bad" I think back to preband and say "okay, so this wasn't so hot, but it wasn't THAT bad". NJChick; Don't worry about the Peanut Butter. A tablespoon or two of that will sit in your stomach for a good long while. I highly doubt you'll be able to eat much of it when you are restricted . In fact, 1 serving of peanut butter makes a good snack. -
Well April, Vines pretty much said it all . Don't beat yourself up too much. I think at some point we all think that we've learned a thing or two since being banded, but then we all find out that the knowledge is stuff we really all had anyway and we need the band working at full performance to help 'remind' us. Right? Congrats on getting your but into gear, and we'll see you around
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Patty, They'll probably tell you not to swim for a few weeks to let the incision heal, so you might want to wait. But ask your doctor first and see what he says. He might tell you it's no problem.
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That is awesome.
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Anyone under a super stressful long term situation
Marimaru replied to burnsun's topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
yesyesyesyesyes. haha. I wont go into too much detail, but suffice to call it a family feud. I got my last fill in November of '04, and was pretty tight, but doing okay, and this feud started and I got a bit tighter (trouble with many solid foods, but still able to eat some) and then it really came to a head and I was on liquids for 2 weeks before finally getting a small unfill. The tension must still be there because I haven't opened back up like I was expecting to, and I'm doing fine on my current restriction level. Hope it all works out for you -
That's really great!
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I just weighed and I had to share!
Marimaru replied to BeckyinTexas's topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
You'll be to goal in no time at that rate!! -
I've always thought the blackandwhites with a focus color point were neat. DeLarla, what would your sexy self be wearin' while you did laundry?
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raging anger and completly discouraged, who me?
Marimaru replied to vinesqueen's topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
Oh goodness. I could haven written this post a few times in the las 6 months. Or at least something very similar. It sounds like my 2 temper tantrums weren't as spectacular as yours, but I had them nonetheless. By January of this year I'd lost 45 lbs since being banded the previous July. Yay! And then it didn't move after that. Okay, okay, I wasn't exersizing, so I started. I started from doing nothing, to walking a block to walking almost 3 miles a day. Still nothing moved (and when I mean nothing, I mean neither the scale, NOR my clothing size). After a couple of months I got mad that the exersizing wasn't working, so I quit doing it. Then the scale managed to move 5 more lbs in the right direction within the next couple of months, then nothing since probably May. Again I started and stopped exersizing because it really didn't seem to do me any good. (never mind feeling better and having more energy, that stuff doesn't matter, right?) All this time I was staying between probably 1400 and 1600 calories if you don't count the holiday weekends that included alcohol, and 'bad days', of which there weren't too many. How can that many calories support 230 lbs?!?! In the meantime, I'm finally noticing myself in the mirror. I think in the last six months, my body has done what my head needed it to do. The difference between what my mind wants, and what my brain needs, I guess. I stand ever-so-slightly taller now, and hey, that's not as big as it used to be, and it's a little harder to get the 'double chin thing' going... little stuff like that. And I'll tell you something, as soon as I started to notice these things, and NOT be so bitter about the damn scale (and bitter I was), it started moving just last week. I also started not going over 1300 calories. Obviously the calorie range I was at was a 'maintenance' level, no matter how screwy I thought the math was. I guess all of the above just says "you'll come out fine on the other end" which is fine and dandy for someone to say, but might not mean anything when you are still waiting for it to happen. But I also felt like kind of a fraud posting on some of the forums, and backed off alot for a while, and then got over my bitterness and started posting more. I think there's 'stages of frustration' with this thing, and we have to work through it. I guess I don't have a profound point to make, just little tidbits of my own knowledge that hopefully make you feel the slightest bit better maybe? At least the idea that you aren't alone? -
Prisca Bleecker-Baggins of Fair Downs as a hobbit, or Alassë Falassion as an elf. intwesting.
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That's some pretty cool stuff there. Are you self taught like me? Crystal, I haven't finished anything yet, but I've started a little... I s'pose that might count for something, haha.
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Ok let's be realistic...doesn't add up
Marimaru replied to HamuChan's topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
Karen, I'm glad you've got your head on straight, lol. I think you'll do quite well for yourself, if you work to keep YOU happy and not some doctor and quack nutritionist. It always drives me nuts to pay someone who ends up knowing less about their subject than I do. >.<