Marimaru

It's good to see some of those experts say that people who are morbidly obese are different than anyone else, in the sense of how the body tells you when to eat and when to stop. I also agree that food is an addiction like many others. They have in there the story of another man who was 1100 lbs and lose 900 with Richard Simmons, but now he's almost back where he was. I think that's a prime example that dieting just will not work for some people. It's amazing to me that the guy is healthy, good for him, but it's amazing.

It takes alot less to have any affect, so you'll want to be careful when you start drinking again. I waited the full 6 weeks that had any dietary restrictions, since it was the 'healing period'. Calorie wise, alcohol is a beast, so be careful that you aren't eating well and exersizing and then blowing your weight loss cuz of the drinks!

For me, sometimes it wasn't about not wanting to have sex, it was about not wanting to be nekkid. HE never minded, but I just can't stand to think about what I must look like to him. Having lost just over half what I want to lose, it's alot different now. I still don't like things, but I do feel better about myself, so I am more interested, lol.

I hope he gets well soon!

A few things come to my mind. Firstly, nothing will be resolved if you don't make him aware that his actions are hurting you. There probably is a portion of this that is baby stress, but there really is no excuse for being so rude to someone you say you love. I will also say that "verbal and emotional abuse" comes in many forms. I can't say one way or the other, because I haven't seen you interact with your husband, but just because it isn't like the relationships your parents had, doesn't mean that it isn't verbally and emotionally abusive. My father is very emotionally abusive, but it's not mean things that he says outright. It's more about manipulation, which is more underhanded, but still abusive. I will also say, to second Karen, that I am from a "broken" home so to speak, and I wish my parents had divorced sooner. My mom tried and tried to fix things, and then tried to do everything herself just so she could stay married to dad so that our home wouldn't be "broken". I was 11 when HE filed for divorce. My youngest sister doesn't remember much of it, my other younger sister didn't understand, but remembers lots of it, and I remember even more. I have a friend who's parents divorced when she was too young to remember, and it's just been the way things are, and her parents are civil to each other. She much more well rounded than I am, that's for sure. Anyway, my point is, if you DO start thinking that things can't be fixed, please don't 'deal with it' for the sake of the baby. I'd rather my parents didn't talk than to see them fight all the time, or to see one ignoring the other. If you think that it's stress, and that it will pass, I still think you should address it. Even something like "Look, we are both tired, and stressed out, and I know money is tight, but I can't deal with the way you are dealing with this." Sometimes I think that acknowledging that you know there is a REASON behind it helps. Maybe try and think of other ways he can deal with stress and suggest them.

I have a horrible time with eggs, unless I only eat the whites. Even egg salad is bad. Usually I boil a bunch of eggs and eat just the whites. Each egg white has half the protien of the egg, and 16 calories, lol. It sounds like you could use a tiny, tiny unfill, if you think you are chewing well.

Hey there, I think everyone crashes now and then. I'm kind of mid-crash myself and needing to get back in gear. I find when I am eating, but not hungry, I need to occupy my hands with something. I'm not very good at it, but I try to crochet when I am in front of the TV n' stuff, so that my hands are busy. Maybe you should dive a little deeper into the idea that you hate your job. You spend alot of time where you work, so it's best not to stay at a place that you hate. Is it a realistic idea to look for a new job? It kind of sounds like you've gotten into a round of depression that you need to pull out of. My best recommendation is to take things one at a time. Tackle working out, or how much you are eating, or what you are eating, or what is bothering you at work, or why you aren't sleeping. Don't try and deal with all of these things at once, it's just too much! Regarding the fill, I think it's rather smart what your doctor does. If I went for a fill on a day when I feel wide open, I would be completely closed off on one of the days where I'm 'all liquids tight', you know? Hope this helps a little.

Honestly, my planning/arranging/scheduling was very fast, and I kind of didn't let myself feel those feelings. All I felt was excited to have an answer to my weight problem. The night before my surgery I start bawling, I couldn't help it, and I couldn't stop. I think my body just said "you've packed this away long enough and now you are going to feel ALL of it". I think I cried for an hour. I'm 2 1/2 years out, 75 lbs down, and I don't regret getting this done, even for a second.

I think you definitely need a little unfill. You'd be surprised how helpful that can be!

Your body was probably just too used to what you were doing. It's wierd, but it happens. Congrats on getting passed your plateau!

My fiance and I started having arguments when I got banded. It went on for a while and one day I finally said "you either need to tell me what is bothering you, or get over it, because things are not okay with us, and I'm not staying like this any longer". He admitted that he was scared that I would leave, and I told him that he fell in love with me nearly at my highest weight, and anyone who wouldn't talk to me then isn't worth my time just because I get skinny. The 2nd thing I told him was that with things going they way they were I was a little nervous that he might tell me that he was going to go back home (he moved from WA to CA to live with me). I think it actually made him feel a bit better that I worried about whether he was thinking about leaving (ie; if I wasn't worried, I didn't care).

I was never told no straws, and I get my liquids in better when I use them. I think there are people who swallow less air using straws, and I think I am one of those people. If your doctor specifically told you that, you should ask them. It may be a general rule that can be tailored on a case by case basis.

My surgery was on a Thursday, Friday I was walking around a mall near my surgery facility, Monday I flew home. I was back to work on Tuesday (with strict orders from my boss that I should go home if I felt like I needed to). The first few nights after work, I took naps. I overdid it a bit on Wednesday by running a bunch of errands for the office. I was never given a pain killer, but was instead given a muscle relaxer. It did not dope me up, which was really nice. It relieved the pain in the port area, because the pain is caused by the muscle in that area spasming around the port and the sutures. I was sore for a good week or 10 days, but nothing horrible. Joyce; I did have the burning and pulling pain a couple weeks out. It seemed to happen whenever I twisted my port area into a position it hadn't been in since surgery. One time I remember specifically is when I jumped out of the car quickly instead of slowing moving myself out. That went away after a while, but I wouldn't say I was in significant pain othr than right when it pulled. If you are worried, you should call your surgeon. Better to call them too much than to not call and find out later you should have.

This one is really recent, but I realized today that my 2 day old niece will never know a "big" Auntie Sarah

Shell, Be sure to update us after your unfill. I have been in the frustrated position that you are in, as have many, many people on this board, and I think you will find the unfill will help alot. Keep in mind that it doesn't have to be much of an unfill either. I had .3cc's removed and it made a huge difference. I also want to say though, that I usually have to take a bite or 2 of my food and wait a bit to be able to finish my meal. We call it "first bite syndrome" around here, so even if the first couple of bites get stuck after your unfill, see if you don't feel better to eat a bit later.

Losing weight with the lap band is alot easier for me than trying to lose (and keep off weight) without it. No, it's not "easy", it's no walk in the park, but it is easiER. I don't get why there is such a bad connotation to doing it the "easy" way... I agree with the above poster, that I fessed up that I had a problem, and that I knew I couldn't take care of it myself, so I am taking care of it one way or another, and I'm not sure how you do it matters as long as it's healthy. Why should we be berated for taking the "easy way out", even if it really WAS the "easy way out"? Why should we do it the "hard" way?? Why is that better?? I kind of laugh at people who think we took the easy way out. I told a friend about my surgery and she said "Isn't that kind of like cheating?" I said "So what if it is?" and laughed. It's just silly, really.

I lose 5 or 10 lbs, and then nothing for months. It's really frustrating, but each time I start losing again, it's always from where I left off, which is what the band has done for me.

Microwaves basically work by heating up the water in whatever you are cooking, which turns alot of that water into steam that leaves your food. I've been trying to cook things that for the most part aren't going to leave me with leftovers.... sometimes with meat I'll reheat something enough just to take the cold edge off from the fridge and then eat it mostly cold. I don't really mind it so much, and the meat tastes better cool and 'in tact' than hot and dry.

I don't think the issue is that the kid wouldn't *say* success 3 times... I think the issue is that when asked about it he *said* he wants to be mediocre... I don't know what it is. At the same time, I have friends who have grand plans, who're working retail because they wont do the work required to get what they want, they just expect it will fall into their lap (even though nothing ever has, ever).

"My heart breaks over obese people who have NEVER been popular, had lots of dates, rode a horse, ran a marathon, etc." This does not say to me that obese people are never popular and had an active life. This says to me that the poster feels bad for obese people WHO HAVE NEVER been popular or had an active life. I believe they are saying basically that they know that there are obese people out there who've always been obese, and they are held back by it. They don't run marathons, or go skiing, or do lots of other active things. I've known lots and lots and lots of people in this position. Most of them are saying things like "When I lose this weight, I'll..." I had started to become like that, but now I'm actually losing the weight and doing those things. I've always been overweight. Like Wheetsin was saying, I'm one of those people who has no idea what my body looks like under all the fat. I have an attractive personality, which is why my fiance is with me. He has admitted that I would be my physically attractive to me if I lost weight, but that it's not really what matters anyhow. Fat/Thin, Tall/Short, a person can present themselves attractively or not. There are people out there who think that all fat people are ugly, but there aren't really all that many people that black/white about it, and all you have to do is avoid those people.

I have to agree with everyone else. Too many people ignored the problem she was having. I wish that instead of saying the lap band killed his wife that man was going after the doctor that killed her through negligence. That is a horrible, horrible story, and I can totally understand why it would make you nervous. The band is *normally* left in place after surgery, but sometimes it is loosened up after a person reaches goal. It just requires keeping an eye on it is all.

If you can't keep down a relatively normal diet, you are too tight. Go get an UNfill, and I bet things start moving again. It doesn't even have to be much of an unfill, just a little bit can make a big difference. Feel better.

My wedding is June 3rd, and I would love to lose 45 lbs by then. However, I refuse to set myself a goal like that, because if I set it, and I don't make it, I will just beat myself up. I plateau too much to be able to count on it. Chances are, I'll lose 20 lbs before then and then drop a bunch right after that I would have loved to have lost to be in my dress, lol. Fortunately, my mom is making my dress, so she can fit it however it needs to be fitted. There have been plenty of people here who've lost what they wanted to lose when they wanted to lose it. I just know that I've never been one of those people.

Anyone can lose weight. It's just a matter of how much, and how long they can keep it off. I never was able to keep any weight off for any good amount of time. The band helps me keep it off.

There are non-hormonal IUD's that you could try. I don't have any experience with any of them, but my mom had one and had good luck with it...