Marimaru

I work for a software consulting agency who does business with a company who has an office is podunk Pennsylvania. My favorites from them: "Yeah, I seen that email" "Are yunz ready to go to lunch" yunz replaces y'all I believe. Ebonics in general irritates the crap out of me. My husband calls it the slow murder of the English language. I say "like" too much. I also curse alot, and I say "oh my god" too much.

Lots of people choose to stay with the "devil they know" vs the unknown.

Wow, thanks! I don't really have a secret... 80 lbs in 3 years is probably patience more than anything. I just know I'll get there eventually, and some days I'll work harder than others, but the band is there to keep me from back tracking... I can pick up where I left off. Mini goals are a big help. There are some threads about mini goals, and I have most of my in my sig I think... my next mini goal that isn't in my sig is to be in a size 12. The last time I actually remember knowing what my size was, is when I was in a size 14, (I think I WAS 14 at the time). I'm also within about 20 lbs of the century club (losing 100 lbs). Keeping things like that in mind helps alot.

It might be interesting to compare this to some numbers about the percentage of suicides that are big people. That number might tell us if this is really all that out of the ordinary as far as that goes. I have to say I would not be surprised to find it was the same or a little higher among weight loss patients vs people who're still big. We've all heard from people who truly thought that getting thin would solve all of their problems.

Hmmm 1) At the moment I think I'd like to have my eyes fixed. I want lasik surgery BAD. Everything else is basically weight loss related (skin/sag) 2) Hoo boy... this is kind of all the same thing wrapped up together I think. I'd like to be a stronger person; more decisive, more able to say no and stand up for myself, and slower to jump up and offer to do everything for everyone. 1a) I wish he'd shave more. He shaves once, Maybe twice a month. He's got a great goatee, but... usually you can't tell. He's gettin' a bit of a belly, but it doesn't take much to get that to go away for him. 2a) He's recently taken up this habit of deciding I don't know what I am talking about. It's REALLY irritating, and I'd like it to go away. It's usually in the guise of trying to be helpful... but the tone is just horrible. Fortunately, attitudes like this from him are usually brought on by stress, and we just moved 1200 miles, so I'm pretty sure it's related.

Pictures, Pictures, Pictures. Have SOMEONE take lots of pictures of you to compare. The mirror LIES to you!! I look in the mirror and see a FAT person still, but I look at pictures, and at a size 14/16, I've still got a ways to go, but I'm really rather average looking now. You could say I've crossed the line between "fat" and "chubby" or something. At least, according to the pictures. The mirror... bleah. YOU will see the difference LAST. It SUCKS, but it's true.

I think it's definitely the right choice to get well after your surgery before turning your world upside down. But take the time to reflect on a few things to... what does he do for you that makes you feel like it would be too hard on your own? What does he do for you that you CAN'T do for yourself? I think that when you can answer questions like that to yourself, you'll be more ready to move on. There are probably a few things he does that you don't do, but that doesn't mean you can't. Also, if you own a business with him, and you opt out during the proceedings, he should be buying your half of the business from you, which (if paid) would leave you a nice little nest egg, I think. Get that infection taken care of. Don't let it linger! They don't go away on their own without care, so please have it looked at if you haven't. *hugs*

My PCP has gone downhill like this. She used to be very attentive, but then she got her own practice and got very interested in taking care of children, and as for adults, is really only interested in routine checkups. The last few times I've gone in there for an actual problem, it's been "oh, go to this specialist and get xyz tested. And then "Oh nothing unusual in the test" with not further mention on what the NEXT step is. I've just moved out of state, so I need to find a new PCP anyway. I liked my doctor for a long time, it so sad when they change like that.

RL = Real Life

Joyce, One thing that caught my attention was the mention of Jr. Prom, and a dress she has that isn't in her size. EVERYONE loses differently, and for everyone how much they've lose and how many sizes they lose are different things as well. There have been people who didn't lose all that much in lbs right away but were dropping sizes, and people who dropped 50 lbs and maybe 2 sizes, you know? It's good to have goals, but I advise against goals that have time limits on them, at least for myself. I often find myself disappointed and depressed if I have given myself a goal and a due date that is not reached. I hope that makes sense!

Remember that the darwin awards to no require that the 'victim' be dead. They only require they not be able to breed. I too would like to know where common sense has gone. Even a distant cousin or something. Or "personal responsibility". I feel bad for the family for having lost their kid, but where does it end? Erasers are small and can be chewed on/choked on, etc, etc.

Wow, how'd you do that? lol

Yup. stress gets me bad. I just moved and I'm really tight. I've been in my new place for almost a week and it still hasn't died down yet. Add TOM on top of that. Bleah.

Kirsten, Your issues with motivation likely stem from things like fear of success you know? I went to therapy for 2 years and found out a lot about myself. I just moved states, so I'm not in therapy anymore, and I still have a lot of work to do, but I have a place to start now that I didn't have before. If you are living off M&M's, you need to get an unfill so you can eat some real food. I'm sure you've guessed by now that super restriction isn't helping you lose weight either.

It's probably a little late now, but I would have recommended biscuit dough. My dad used to do that when he made pizza. My mom makes home-made dough that's much better, but the biscuit dough works too. :eek:

That's actually about what I thought it would be. I've often said that the women who are going to have abortions are going to get them no matter what. My personal view is that I could never have one, but I would also never presume to tell anyone else what they should do.

Clara, You should take your daughter's (the counselor) words to heart. You are their mother, but at the same time, they are their own people. My husband has 9 older siblings, and one of them has been in and out of jail his whole life. All of the others have their lives in orders with nice families and good jobs. Obviously, this guy was going to do what he did no matter who his parents were, you know? He got the same upbringing as the other 9 kids. It's easy to blame the parents for the problems of the child, and of course, there is truth in that, but there are just some things a parent can't avoid happening to their kid no matter what. I'm not a parent yet, so I can't even imagine how you must be feeling, but I do think you should distance yourself from your daughter. If she gets a hold of you and starts screaming about where you were when she needed you again, tell her you'd be glad to talk about that when she can keep her inside voice and be willing to actually listen to you.

Yes, stress can definitely be an explanation. I actually got an unfill back during one VERY stressful time in my life. And just a few weeks ago I was thinking I should get a fill, and then this last week with moving from one state to another I've gotten totally locked up like you are describing.

I've gotten tylenol liquid, and there's a theraflu liquid that I bought, but have not yet tried.

Well, there is a link on the page to a 2nd article where someone from Time Warner called and denied it was every said. The writer of the article makes notes about the person who first made the claim as being someone who likes to 'embellish' (to put it lightly). It may have been something the guy actually said, but it was probably entirely sarcastic, you know?

It's hard with parents. Most people that age aren't going to change, even if they CAN admit they have bad behavior (which most of them can't). You give very little detail about your issues with your mom, but I get kind of a feeling from it that your relationship with your mom is similar to mine (I am also the oldest of 3 girls). I just spent the last 2 years in counceling basically coming to terms with the idea that my mom is who she is, and it's ME that has to figure out how to deal with it, and figure out how to filter out the hurtful comments. Honestly, after that much time I don't have many answers other than that I feel more like it's HER issue than something I need to fix, you know?

I am a strong believer in Karma. It's not often you get to see Karma come around and bite someone in the ass, but you should feel confident that it will.

it's kind of fishing (well, not kind of), but next time you see them you could talk about your most recent NSV (Yay, I finally reached a size X, I haven't seen that since ___) and see if he says anything?

UPS pisses me off sometimes. I had to send the payment for my surgery to my surgeon before my surgery and I overnighted it via UPS a week and a half before my surgery. The day before my surgery, they had still not received it. Fortunately, I was able to fax my surgeon a copy of the cashiers check, and they accepted that as evidence the payment was coming. It got there 3 days after my surgery. I was in tears

If you exchanged pictures, I'm not sure there is anything to say. The only time I've ever heard a guy complain about meeting a chick that was over weight was when the pictures they sent were older and they'd gained weight, or something like that. If it comes up, you can just tell him you're 'on the way down', but I wouldn't bother mentioning the surgery.