Carrie

It's no secret to those who have kept up with me that I've been on a very thin line between buyer's remorse and just dealing with life after surgery. I have what I feel to be a unique situation where I feel I made a horrible decision and had surgery I was not ready to have. I did this because as the wife and mother, I am, who refuses to disrupt others and make things go as smoothly as possible it was the ONLY time I could do this because of various situations in my family aka my husband's life. I had asked to cancel this surgery for a week previous but was constantly reminded of all the negative issues it would cause to happen to myself and more importantly my family. I went into the OR telling them without any drugs in my system that I had changed my mind and wanted to stop. But was knocked out and woke up as is. I have gotten many comments to the order of "deal with it". I posted in my personal blog my feelings and that's all I get. Well obviously, I can not undo what has been done, so I have no other choice but to "deal with it". I feel that I am no longer getting the support I need from this forum at this time. I feel like I am of a VERY slim majority of people who had a situation thrown at them, thought they were making the best choice for the family and is living with regret. I know the majority of folks on here are really looking for support and guidance. I feel I have neither to offer anyone. So with that being said, I think at least I will take a break from here. I'm sincerely happy that everyone who is happy has found what they believe to be the right choice for THEM. And with that I wish them continual success and happiness in reaching every goal they set for themselves. I feel until I am able to deal with the cards dealt I do best to stay away from being reminded the need to simply deal with it as that's all I have to do because I have no choice.

with this problem. I feel like I have been totally honest with everyone about how I feel. I really regret having this surgery, that's my experience. I feel like when I state this I am rediculed (sp) and told to deal with it. Well obvioiusly I have to deal with it because I have no other choice. I can't turn back and change what my body is these days. My husband and I continue to argue, I'm still covered with the nasty ozzing rash after almost two weeks. I've tried everything on the rash. But beyond that, I'm starting to question if this forum even benefits me anymore. I am purposely avoiding answering people's question because I don't want to be the bitch who regrets or the one to pops everyone's balloons at their birthday party. It's easy to say do this but your experience is totally diffferent than mine. I'm not happy and I don't know what to do in order to become a whole person again. I think with that said until I can somehow become a whole person again, to avoid opinons of those saying deal with it, I'm going to deal with it my way and steer away from here for a while. I'm happy everyone else is happy with there CHOICE but I'm not, it's the worst fucking thing I have done in a very long time. At this point it has destroyed my life and it's working on my 10 year old marriage. So with that being said, I wish everyone the best sincerely.

Again I'm sorry I have posted here. I feel that because I am anti-sleeve and had a bad experience this isn't the place for me. I won't pollute you forum with anymore requests for support because the Lord knows I'm one in a million with this. Best of luck to the rest of you.

I sincerely appreciate any and all help and or support I have gotten from this forum at one time. It is very hard to relay one's complete feelings, emotions and issues on any forum not just this one. With that being said I am reminded why the idea of a break sounded so good. To be honest with each of you the only thing I feel I have in common with anyone one here is a lack of a whole stomach. I continue to wish you guys the best.

I don't want $$$ I want him to know what he has done and what I am stuck dealing with. As far as not being in my "right mind" he did cover his ass by by giving me Versed. He said at the time it was for my Epilepsy to avoid me having a seizure. I have had Versed on many occasions and it has zero effects on me, I have been known when having a spinal injection in the past to talk to the nurse about purses and stuff and remember the entire conversation all the way through recovery. I told him before he gave me the Versed it had ZERO effect on me. So yes, I understand legally I maybe screwed because of the dose he gave me, but I'm not asking for a law suit. I just want him to know the hurt and misery he has caused by staying on his schedule for the day instead of listening to the wishes of the patient.

Honestly had been given the option I would not have had the sleeve done but the other procedure instead. I do feel my case was a one in a million being done against my will but that was here in the US. I wish you the best regardless of which procedure you choose.

I'm moving from DFW to the Redmond area. At the moment I'm still in a funk with regret but would like to know who will be near me in the Seattle/Redmond area of Washington. I'm sure eventually I will be happy again and would like to find others like me who've had this surgery.

We got notice that we are moving to Washington State (Redmond area) from DFW in about 2 months. I am excited to start a new life in a place I haven't even visited. I've been to Seattle but not Redmond and that was only on vacation. I continue to regret having this surgery. My life would have been so much better if I had just had the Lap band removed and NOT had this surgery. I try to avoid any reminders of this surgery which is impossible. My outside physical scars are almost healed. I went to the dentist yesterday for my teeth and forgot about the bright light they use. Which immediately caused me to have flash backs of the day of surgery and the powerless feelings I have associated with that. I go between feeling like I want to just give up and literally starve my body. I have no physical hunger and feel like a freak because of it. I try to get protein in but following that diet reminds me of that powerless feeling. I hated my physical self before this surgery and now that feeling is about 10x that. :thumbup1: I hope everyone else is happy because I'm not sure if I will ever be happy again. I honestly don't care about weight loss as it's yet another reminder of that day.

Thanks, we rented a place in Redmond. I have been to Seattle but not Redmond specifically. We made sure to get a place with an indoor pool, indoor basketball court and fitness room to hopefully make rainy days easier with the kids. I made the mistake of going to the dentist for my braces today. What a mistake. I forgot about the medical bright lights. I told my dentist the reason for my dislike of lights and closed my eyes. The bad thing is because of the move he has decided to make my visits more frequent to get as much work done as possible and allow me some time before I have to see another dentist when we get settled in Redmond. I have an appointment coming up in the next week or so with the surgeon who did the VSG. I have decided to cancel that appointment due to the move and the fact their is nothing to be done other than saying you've lost 30 pounds. I'm not going to another Bariatric Surgeon for follow up care once we move so what's the point? I have so much to get done around here I don't see the point of wasting his time or mine. Thanks again for all of your support.

Thanks everyone. Of course I continue to be stuck in the body I don't want as I have no other choice. Our relationship has improved as I no longer tell him anything. Nothing said equals no problem. So as long as I can keep a smile on my face all is well. Yesterday we got what we were expecting, a job transfer from Texas to Washington State. So in 6 weeks I will be living in an apartment that I have yet to see in a new state I've only visited once. Our extended family will continue of course to live in Texas so we are on our own. I hope the sense of something new and adventure will keep me distracted from the reality of my situation and the body I do not want. And LittleSteve please have the respect for yourself not to make yourself out to be an ass in front of everyone because that's exactly how you are coming across.

I still feel like I had this surgery for the wrong reasons, like I was pushed into it due to having to move cross country w/o a support system there, hubby already took the time off, we already got the loan, didn't know if we would get the $5k we had already paid back, etc... I've kept a happy face as long as I can. Today I feel like shit and I'm deeply depressed. I've been in bed all day. They apparently used betadine which I am allergic to to prep me and I have a rash all over my stomach (I told them and had it on my bracelet I was allergic) that is driving me nuts, along with a husband asking what's the matter? I'm really mad at myself for being pushed into something like this. I told the OR staff I had changed my mind but they didn't stop, they just knocked me out and continued. Back to bed I go... day 5 or 6 or whatever freaking day this is sucks. I can't believe I did this to myself. :001_tongue:

I'm very thankful to see the support each of you have given. I am back from the weekend from hell. This surgery had destroyed my life and being. I was watching tv with my 1 year old and a commercial came on Nick Jr. Talking about how fun it would be if grown ups could play. It showed an OR. I saw the bright OR lights and immediately had a "flash back". I can not express how unhappy I am. I actually really like my surgeon and he has no idea how I feel or that he did a surgery on someone without consent. I feel I am constantly reminded via pain and discomfort of healing from this surgery and the fact I am scared to eat and often times drink because of pain or discomfort. Then I have nightmares of the OR at night. It got so bad that law enforcement has paid a visit. I am going one day at a time at this point. I have two young children and I owe them at least 20 years. After that I can't guarantee anyone anything. I wish I had a better update that things were better. But they aren't. I have no idea what I am going to do. My husband and I have been married for almost 10 years and this has almost destroyed our marriage. I feel I can no longer tell him how I feel due to him freaking out and getting the cops involved. I would wish this on nobody. I feel I am the only freak in the universe with this problem as if I am some weird mutant. As I said, I wish the news were better, but that's all I got for now.

Pretty much what Christie said. So get used to being hungry.

My Question: Does VSG cause any problem with the effectiveness of most birth control pills? I am currently on Seasonique and besides the "no kids for XX number of months rule" I am fairly sure we are out of the baby business. Thanks!

I'm hoping that's not another thing I have to deal with because I'm at the end of my rope with new changes for this time period. So that's good news to hear, I have an appt with my GYN in a couple weeks because she is holding my BCP's hostage, we don't agree on pap smears. I've had 10 years worth of normal pap smears in her office, why can't I skip one or two? I feel it's more about covering her butt than what is actually needed 2 weeks post op from VSG. sorry for the complaint

I'm glad to hear you are doing well. I was about to send you another PM to check on ya. I hated my Vitamins so my doctor told me to take the "kiddy vitamins". So I am eating two Fred Flintstones per day. I haven't had a chance to look at the individual Vitamin amounts but I heard somewhere along the way that 2 Freds are good enough. Every now and then I get a Barney but I give him to the kiddo. lol. Glad to hear you got to go on vacation. Sorry it was stressful with the food. Have you thought about having a "Daddy's Only Yummy Cooler"? Basically a 6 pack cooler with ice or the compress stuff to keep it cold and pre-make some rolled up different types and combinations of meat and cheeses and other high Protein Snacks. So that when you do find something you "want" you can perhaps get the kids to share it as a group with you getting a bite or two and that satisfy you. Because with kids they will scarf it down and it's gone almost to the bare wooden table as you know. :cursing: Take care and keep in touch!

I don't want to take over your thread. But for those of us who are interested in hormonal Birth control aka the pill, I asked Dr. J about the effectiveness of the pill post VSG in his area of this forum. I am awaiting his response as I noticed it hadn't been asked to him. Here's the link to the question and hopefully his answer: http://verticalsleevetalk.com/ask-dr-gregg-jossart/8778-effectiveness-birth-control-pills-after-vsg.html

I noticed he didn't get to respond but I did a search as I had never heard of your surgery. I found the website below that states, "The JIB fell into disrepute due to the overwhelming side effects and health complications. As a result the JIB is no longer a recommended Bariatric Surgical Procedure and it is currently recommended that patients who still have a JIB in place have it converted to a gastric bypass." Bariatric Surgery Hope this helps.

Hi Jackie, I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. If you have read any of my posts it's been rough on me as well even though this is my second time around, first time was with a Lap Band. I am VERY concerned about the vomiting. Did your surgeon offer any type of program to follow as far as what to eat during certain weeks? Mine has a certain diet for the first 7 weeks he makes all of us use as he has found it to be the mose successful. You have to remember you have a brand new tummy. You would not feed a 6 week old a steak or hamburger, you have to think of your stomach and eating as a newborn, which stinks but it's the truth. Please let me know if you have any booklets or material to help you. When you eat are you chewing it down to almost nothing? I know that from my Lap Band and it's true with the Sleeve as well. You have to be careful on chewing and even where you are there are still foods my surgeon would not allow. Please keep in touch with all of us and keep your head up. You have made a big decision to have this surgery. Now you must make all the changes necessary to be healthy and successful. It's a challenge and not so fun sometimes but that's part of the decision we all made in order to become a better healthier person. ((((HUGS))))

Everyone needs a break sometimes. I hope you had a wonderful time with your bestest friend.

Thank you so much for posting this! I'm still coming out of the WTF did I do stage as you know.

I'm a stay at home mom and about a week out. I used to work in a doctor's office. I can say honestly if I worked outside the home I would be ready to go back on Tuesday (after Labor Day holiday) without a doubt. That would be 12 days off total including the day of surgery. The main thing would be to avoid the others in the office who can eat "normal foods". I would want to murder them if a stressful day or a good meal came in.

I was told the more you walk the more your guts move around and work in the hospital and if you don't do what you're supposed to you could damage or kill part of your intestine. I don't know if that's true but I didn't question it and walked. That being said I know anesthesia slows everything down and any opiate pain meds they might have given you will also slow you down poo wise. I had surgery on 08/26 and today was the first time I got the ball going.

I am 8 days out and becoming more and more incorporated with my family than before. I believe my problem was the fact that I avoided meals in order to avoid food, which made me miss dinner outings with my kids. The last two nights we have made sure to get out of the house for as long as I can stand it. Last night I thought I could make it through dinner at the food court with my family. Hubby and 5 year old get Chinese food. I admit it looked tasty for about 3 seconds then suddenly the idea of getting my eye brows done sounded like a much better and successful idea. Did I mention that the eye strings hurt? No where near as bad as last time when they burned me with wax but it's a bit sensitve especially a few days out in the wicked chair you have to sit in. I was cool as long as I didn't sneeze, cause sneezing = pain. So by the time I got done with my eye brows (which is something as a SAHM I NEVER HAVE TIME TO DO!) they were done eating. I stopped by GNC and grabbed my dinner of Muscle Milk. I had my first post-op with my surgeon yesterday. He is very concerned as to the rash from hell I have and wants a full investigation because the next person who is allergic to iodine may not walk away with just a rash. Plus he wants to give me the name of the prep so I can tell additonal surgeons NOT to use it. According to his scales I had lost 7 pounds. After walking miles around the mall last night I lost another pounds. So I am again in the 219. Plus I am no longer on broth that makes me want the meat that goes with it, but on Creamy Soups which I can live with. Next week I can have Wendy's Chili. So there is an end in sight. I appreciate all the support ya'll have given me over the past week or two and wanted to let folks know you will adapt. Our bodies adapt through pregnancy adapt through weight gain, weight loss. It's our brains that take a time to catch up and say it's not going to kill me.