AudreyZ

Forget the fact that you have a band, and ask yourself, how would you handle this person, if say, you bought a new boat, and he acted this way? Or planned a trip to an exotic place with the family, and he couldn't afford it? People act jealous because something inside of them is lacking. It might be willpower, it might be faith in themselves, lack of courage, you get the idea. Being nice obviously isn't helping, so next time he makes a remark, tell him to stop, as his comments are harming your friendship. Tell him you no longer want this issue to come between you two- this was YOUR choice to make, to live a healthier lifestyle, and if he can't be happy for you and make positive comments, than to not say anything at all. Good luck, and I hope you can get through to your friend, instead of having to tell him to take a hike down the pike.

I had the same concerns myself a few years back, as it is genetics on both sides of the family to be overweight. I am the obese one of the family on my side, and yet, I was always the athletic one, go figure. On my husband's side, he has one sister who is obese, as well as many great aunts and uncles and his mother. The rest of his family has a weight problem, but it's minimal. On my side, half are overweight, the rest are thin, and I am, as I mentioned above, the only obese one in the family. I've learned with my kids, to limit junk food intake, and teach them about healthy eating habits. Tell them why a glass of orange juice is better for them (potassium for the heart, vitamin C for colds) than Hi C, or a side of salad instead of chips with their sandwich for lunch. I find that if they understand the importance of nutrition, and not weight gain/loss, it is less intimidating to them. If you constantly get after them for having a freeze pop on a hot day, you will only make them feel guilty for having it, then they will sneak food, to make themselves feel better. Let them have that treat- it's ok, so long as they get enough exercise and eat properly most of the time! Isn't that what we should concentrate on, instead of scaring them into eating their way into an eating disorder? I cannot emphasize enough, physical exercise. I see way too many kids, obese, heavy, and skinny, playing too many video and computer games. Kick their butts outside, give them a ball, and tell them to PLAY. For that matter, join them- you'll both benefit from the exercise and fun.

Perhaps the doctor was just trying to help his patient get this surgery, and knew the struggle she would have if she didn't report a higher number. These insurance companies can be unfair at times to people who desperately need treatment, and get refused for something that will make them healthier in the long run.

Wow, color me confused. I haven't been here for awhile. What happened, and who did this? Yeppers! If someone could fill me in, I'd appreciate it. I don't know who to trust or not now. :guess

My thoughts and prayers to you, Ryan, and your wife Patti. I am so sorry you both had to go through this hell. May the road to recovery be quick and pain free. (((((RYAN AND PATTI)))))

Would you happen to have a sinus infection? Sometimes, those can be nasty, and if you're having any mucus draining down in your stomach, that could be the reason why the Tylenol is making you sick. I hope you feel better. Put a heating pad on the area where it hurts. I had one of my co workers do this not too long ago, and she said it was the only relief she had had in days. Later on that week, she went to the doctors and found out she had a sinus infection.

Thanks, Teresa, I shall enjoy the last big meal, LOL. I am glad I told these people about this place and obesity.com. They looked like they really could use the support- not to mention, people at both places know how it feels. Not saying family members or friends aren't supportive, but if they're thin or slightly over weight and can lose it by conventional means, they don't understand the frustrations and fears some of us go through daily. So, the more help, the better. You've all been great here for me, in more ways than one. La Madame, I think I worded the meat part wrong, LOL. I meant the dietician said many people can't eat meat for the first four months, as they find it difficult to chew and digest- she didn't say you couldn't have it, that just many people said they weren't able to eat it for awhile.

Hi folks. Went to a seminar yesterday- one more to go, then I get to meet my surgeon. I have to wait until January for that meeting, but hey, its' coming along. Anyhow, I asked about soda and weight loss surgery. Strange the dietician said you can have flat soda at four months time, and eventually, fizzy soda later on in the year, providing that it is diet, of course. I asked her if it would erode the band, and she said no, it's impossible, as the band is on the outside of the stomach. So, another conflict in what others are being told, ggggggggrrrrrrrr. Anyone else's dietician tell them this? I would miss my Fresca and diet ginger ale the most, although, I don't have them often. It would be nice to know if it's a permanent no-no, or temporary. She also said many people can't eat meat for about four months after any weight loss surgery, lap band included. Glad I am having it done after the holidays, can't imagine Christmas without the beef, ham, lamb or turkey-which ever meat we'll be having this year (I haven't made up my mind yet which to serve ) I also recommended this site for some people at the seminar. Seems like a lot of them had no idea there were great support groups on the net available to them.

That is awesome, Teresa! Keep up the great work! :banana I love reading your posts and seeing your progress- it gives me hope! I have one more seminar to attend the first week in January, then I get to meet my future surgeon. Can't wait, it seems like forever til this all gets done and over with.

Oh, and I forgot to say, good for you, for putting your foot down with her. A couple of more times, and she will eventually learn that your friendship isn't all about food, but other things. Is there any way during lunch, that you can make half of your lunch break into an exercise time? Maybe walk around the building, ask her to join you, if she doesn't, get up yourself and do it. It will spare you from having to continue to watch her gorge herself, and meanwhile, you get a few minutes of exercise in the process, and a chance to clear your mind.

After reading what you wrote, I have come to the conclusion that she really equates food with friendship and socializing. When I was thinner years back, my best friend used to bring Dunkin Donuts munchkins and other junk food over. My other two best friends did the same. I was the one in the group that told them to please stop bringing it over my house, as I didn't want to gain any more weight- at the time I had about 25-30 to lose from my second pregnancy. I was successful maintaining this weight, until I had my tonsils out and another pregnancy after my tonsilectomy (sp). Of course, being tired and sick most of the time, I ate, and ate, and ate.....and here I am. Oh, and I also had a friend who owns a pizza and sub shop- you can imagine the feasts she would bring over, or have at her home for all of us to enjoy. Of course, she brought salad, too, for me. To this day, my friends are all the same, much heavier than I am. I don't see them as much, as I live further away now. However, I did have a couple of other friends who told me they thought my weight gain was on their shoulders. I said no, it was mine- I really enjoyed their friendship, and at the cost of my health, continued to maintain it, and still do, but at a distance (I don't get to see them as much anymore, live about 2 hours away). I am the one who should have put my foot down harder and made it more clearer like I did one time- I had my friend bring her boxes of goodies out to the car- and had her take them home with her. She got the hint, and didn't bring anything over for a long time, until an incident in her life happened that caused her to want junk food all the time (her husband was sick, and eventually died from cancer). I didn't have the heart to berate her at that time. However, I told her I wasn't going to eat them, as I wanted to stay healthy and lose weight. Of course, I didn't succeed, but that's on my shoulders, not hers. What I am saying is, some people really do equate food with socializing. Most of us oldies were brought up that if you visited a family member or friend's house, you brought something to eat with you as a courtesy. Get togethers with family and friends always have food.....birthday parties, retirement parties, weddings, holidays, think about it, it's always about food, and in some cases, drinks (alcohol). So, many times, people like your co-worker don't always realize that they are doing this- it's ingrained in their minds to share their food and friendship. We all know how deadly that can be, but at the same time, these friends can also be a God send to us, too, in other ways. I wouldn't have traded them back then for anything, and I feel that way now. Maybe just saw less of them for my health's sake- we got together daily, sometimes from early in the morning til later in the evenings. We had a lot of great times, too, and when we weren't eating, we were laughing and having the times of our lives, while the kids all played, LOL I hope your co-worker can eventually see the harm she is causing. Again, it may not be intentional- this may be something she is just so used to doing, she isn't aware of it. Bringing food to your office might be her way of just wanting to say hi, but she uses food as an excuse to drop by. She sounds very lonely to me as well- so food is her vehicle to conversations. Maybe a little one to one chat about this may do her and you the world of good.