sbingram12

It took me a lot to write out that title. I'm 20 years old and I've never had a boyfriend. Lots of people tell me, "oh you just need to have more confidence." Yeah, well I used to have confidence until I couldn't get a boyfriend. UGH. People tell me differently, but I'm so tired of never having a relationship. You may think this thread is stupid, but it's a valid problem that I have with myself. Don't tell me that I just need to have patience ugh. It may be selfish, but I want people to think I'm attractive. I know that people like my face, but that's not the full me. I want to get double-takes from people that I actually find attractive. I want to have a MUTUAL attraction just ONCE would be nice. ugh. Every guy that I've ever liked has always just found me unattractive/disgustingly fat, OR they're gay. lol My gay-dar is horrible and I can never tell. I just want to be liked and I want guys in general to find me attractive (I know I sound pathetic, but that's what I want, and if I can't post a rant like this on these boards, I don't know where else I'd post them.) I actually have a great sense of humor and I can make anyone laugh after we hang out for a while. I make friends really easily. My only downfall is the way my body looks, and it depresses me to no end.

That is why I don't like going to doctors in the first place. I went into the office, and he pretty much told me that the reason I gained all my weight back was all my fault. I cried so much as soon as I got out of there this afternoon. When he walked in and said hi, the first thing he said was, "Ok, you're back at your starting weight. Now, why do you think that is? Do you think it's because you haven't been following the diet at all? Do you eat ice cream and chips everyday?" I was floored. I had always thought of him as a nice person, but this was the rudest thing I've ever hear from ANYONE I've ever discussed my weight with. After that, he said he'd give me the revision, but then he said, "you know, I'm giving you this revision because the band doesn't really work for some people, and you're one of them, but if you keep stress eating you're not going to lose weight. Eating a whole bag of potato chips when you don't feel good is going to kill you." If that wasn't enough, he also said, "You have to look at what you're eating when you have bariatric surgery, you can't just eat everything you see." I WAS SO ANGRY. Like, WHAT THE F**K. WHAT DO YOU THINK I'VE BEEN DOING FOR THE LAST F**KING YEAR AND A HALF??:mad0: JUST SITTING ON MY A** EATING ALL DAY? Ugh, I was so angry, and I still am. He made me feel so small - not the good kind, the ashamed kind. And why? I've done everything right for the last year and a half with this band and I'm RIGHT BACK WHERE I WAS. That's not MY fault, that's the BAND.:mad0: I said something about stress eating ONE TIME about 6 months ago when I was taking finals (I'm still in college) and now he's throwing it back in my face?? WTF.:thumbup: He scheduled an appointment for me to get the revision, but he made it seem like he was doing me a huge favor even considering it. He's so rude. When he took me over to the nurses station he said, "Make sure we get her in a sleep study, at her weight we don't know what could happen." at HER WEIGHT? WTF. There are people who weigh 3 TIMES as much as I do that go to that SAME office. I only weigh 237 right now (the same as when I started with the lap band). But the reason I need surgery is because I'm only 5'5" and because of health problems. "Only" is a relative term, but there are people that weigh a LOT more than I do. This whole experience made me so angry. I just want to get my sleeve done and never have to see any of those people ever again. My question is: how can you work at a bariatric surgery place and be so rude to people about their weight? wtf?

Hello! lol I'm not even old enough to drink and I'm having weight problems lol. Anyway, I had the band done in Mar 2009 and now it's been about a year and a half and I'm back where I started. I have an appointment with my surgeon on Friday 2 July to see when I can have the sleeve done. I'm back at BMI 40 and I still have 2 comorbidities (PCOS and insulin resistance), so I'm not worried about being approved for the sugery. I'm hoping there are others on here close to my age and at the same starting point that I am at.

Does anyone have any ideas? Here are some artists that really get me going (lol don't laugh I'm only 20 and I'm in college, so my taste is probably really different, but feel free to add anything you find upbeat and easy to work out to): Justin Bieber - my #1 workout music, LOVE LOVE LOVE B.o.B Lady Gaga (sometimes) Miley Cyrus Young Money (sometimes) Nikki Manaj Usher (some upbeat stuff like "OMG" and others) Sean Kingston (sometimes) Jason Derulo definitely "You're a Jerk (remix)" by New Boyz if you guys can give me any suggestions - doesn't matter if it's the same type of music or not - definitely reply to the post!

I think that's one of the reasons that I didn't do well with the band. My surgeon's nutritionist just gave me vague ideas about what to eat and told me to "push the band to see what I could eat." Isn't that backwards? He told me ABOUT the liquids and mushies stages, but he never specifically gave me a list of foods that were acceptable in each stage. Hopefully my new surgeon who's doing my revision will be a little more attentive to my needs. Did your surgeon give you specific ideas about what to eat at each stage?

Is cereal still an ok food to eat when you get sleeved? I haven't been sleeved, and it's one of the things that I can routinely get through my current lap band and I'm worried. I don't know how the sleeve will work, but I hope I don't have trouble getting in my protein like I do with the band. Right now, I can't get most meats through my band.

That is also what I've heard

I've had the band for about a year and a half, and I right back to where I started weight-wise, BMI-wise, and health problems still afflict me. I, like you, have followed everything I'm supposed to follow, so why should I be back up to my original stats? I'm going to get a revision to sleeve in a couple of months (I'm set for 20 Sept, but there's an opening for 23 August, so I'll move it up earlier). All I can say is, call your doctor right away and get a revision. I'm just mad that I waited so long to get mine.

Yayyy! I'll be sleeved on 20 Sept! I'm so excited! lol This isn't much of a post, but I just wanted to share it with someone.:thumbup:

@BlackBerryJuice: that's awesome! I don't know if you saw my other post, but my surgeon was really rude, so I'm trying to find a different one, and maybe if I do, I'll be able to get the surgery before school starts. Wish me luck, I'll keep you updated!

@everyone: thank you so much. I really thought for a the latter part of the day that it was my fault that he got so rude. I guess it's another thing I have to work on: not taking everything that happens as my fault. I'm in the process of looking for a different doctor in my area, and I'll keep you guys updated. Maybe with a different doctor, I'll be able to get a sooner surgery date. I would like to have the surgery before school starts up again if possible. @ANITALOU: yeah, I bought a body bugg and it said that I was also not eating enough, just all the wrong things.

Hey, everyone! I have my appointment with my surgeon tomorrow to discuss the revision from band to sleeve. I'm so excited. My surgeon is pretty chill, so I won't have a problem with anything, and my BMI is back up to the original standards for getting weight loss surgery - which isn't a good thing, but it makes everything a whole lot easier with the insurance company. Nevertheless, I will come back on here tomorrow afternoon and update you guys on what's going on and my surgery date.

lol yes, sorry, it's a good thing lol.

@breezy: it makes a lot of sense! And, if you don't mind, I may take you up on the offer about getting advice from you :smile1: Like I said, I've never had a bf and I really don't know how to pick the right one at all. Thank you :wink1:

@brittu ok cool (well not cool, but you know what I mean.) Thank you! I really appreciate you letting me see that letter!

Has anyone who switched from band to sleeve here had Federal BCBS insurance? Can anyone tell me about their process? I've had the band for about a year and a half and I'm right back up to BMI 40 and I STILL have my two comorbidities - PCOS and insulin resistance. Can anyone tell me any information about their process with Federal BCBS and getting switched to the sleeve? Thanks in advance!

Thanks, everyone :thumbup: I had had a really bad day when I posted this, and I really like that you guys took the time to answer my rant! Thank you so much!! My appointment with my surgeon is this friday! I'm excited and soooo ready. He still has to send a letter to the insurance, but I'm right back up to where I started with lapband and I shouldn't have a problem getting approval. I'm glad I can talk to you guys about everything, even this! And, I'm so ready to be able to start beating guys off with a stick lol

@mellifrits: I turn 21 in October (so kinda a long way off lol) and I think that if you feel comfortable going to your reunion you should go, but if not, then don't! You shouldn't have to subject yourself to anything you might find uncomfortable before you're ready! But on the other hand, you may want to go because this may be a good jumping off point to getting out of your comfort zone. lol I think things through too much, and when my reunion comes around, I'll be in the exact same spot as you are right now.

me too I subscribed to this thread

I agree with ouroborous. Tell him you had stomach surgery - he doesn't need to know what kind - and say your doctor told you to watch what/how much you eat.

I'm in the same spot as BlackBerry. I'm young, physically active - heck I do p90x every single day, AND I have lap band right now - YET, I still have trouble keeping it off. THAT's why I'm getting the sleeve.

So federal bcbs approved you for the sleeve pretty quickly? I'm excited! They approved my lap band within 24 hours and I was really happy about it, so I was hoping they'd have the same response time for the revision to the sleeve.