hopeful1

Yes, the band is a tool, but without a proper fill, that tool is still in the toolbox, LOL!!! I agree with Blossom's statement. My weight loss has pretty much stopped since December! I feel I need another fill and I've had 5 since my surgery in October. I'm at 2.00. I've got to get in for another one. Thanks La Madam for letting us relatively new bandsters know that the fullness is more in your chest. I get that tight feeling sometimes at the beginning of a meal. So I stop eating for a few minutes, but then it will go away. I was able to eat a whole cheeseburger Happy Meal the other day. (I know I shouldn't have, but I'd been out all day and was starving.) But that's just what frustrates me! I think if I was properly tightened I wouldn't be able to do that.

I am very sad, mad, embarrassed, whatever and don't know where else to go. I need some help. I'm afraid to confess because I can't take getting criticized for making stupid decisions, or no decisions, and not following the rules. First the confession, I am sabotaging my weight loss. My surgery was Oct. 28 and I've lost a total of about 25 lbs., 5 of that before the surgery. I've been on a plateau of a range of the same 3 lbs. for nearly three months now. My only real loss was right after the surgery. I eat all the time. In my defense my band isn't tight enough. I'm calling on Monday. But it wouldn't matter. I sit and snack on things I shouldn't and eat too much at meals. I don't drink enough water. I watch too much TV and I can't make myself go to Curves. And I'm getting worse. Then let me start with my excuses. It's been a difficult three months. My daughter quit her job in December and came home from Florida with no job -- her and her fiance too -- and I've been helping them along financially because no one else could. I'm tired of worrying about that but they have no one else. Then I lost my job of 10 years the end of December, I guess mostly due to a bunch of buyouts of the company I worked for, but probably due to some mistakes I made too. Then my husband lost his job through no fault of his own, the company just ran out of money. We are not broke, don't get me wrong, but the beating my ego has taken over this is terrible. I turned down one job offer, only to have another one fall through. Now the only things that seem to be out there are at half my old salary. So I'm trying to make some decisions about what do to with myself -- go back to school, take a lower paying job, etc. It seems like all I do is sit at the computer looking for a job. My husband is looking too but neither of us is getting anywhere. And we have a wedding to pay for in July. In the middle of all of this our son-in-law's mother was killed in a car accident. You wouldn't think that would be such an issue for me. But she was very tall and slim and so cheerful. She was younger than I am and I have survivor's guilt I think. It makes me sad to think she'll never see our grandson again and he won't remember her because he's only two. My daughter did get a good job, but still can't pay all her bills. Her fiance doesn't have a job yet. We're hoping for one on Monday. I have pretty much cut them off to fend for themselves but she owes me/us a lot of money my husband doesn't know about. He's not happy with her choice for a husband -- probably if I admit it neither am I. He'd go ballastic over all this and I can't handle that either. I know life could be so much worse and I'm not complaining about it. These are just some of the things I've been dealing with. I just can't seem to get my act together and focus on my weight loss. I went through all of this to not succeed. I know 25 lbs. is a good loss, but I'd gained 10 - 15 lbs. prior to going for my first consultation. So actually from last Spring I'm only down about 10 lbs. I'm so embarrassed to see people who know I've had the surgery (which is just about everybody) because I know they're thinking that I'm not succeeding even though they don't say so. I sometimes really wish I'd had gastric bypass like some of my freinds. But I know it could have been so much better if I wasn't cheating so badly and put forth a better effort and it's not really the bands fault. I don't know what you guys are going to say. You are so supportive of each other. I'm so, so disappointed that I'm not at at least 30-40 lbs. lost. I need some help desperately. Please don't e-mail me at home though. I wouldn't want my husband to read this. And don't get me wrong, he's a good guy. He has his own serious health problems and can't handle anymore stress. I know I'm depressed but I'm already on medication and don't want anymore. I just want some success - SOMEWHERE! Thanks for listening.

Again, thanks to all. I'd forgotten how easy it is to look up things here as well. I went back to the "fills" forum and found lots of good information. I do think I haven't reached my "sweet spot" yet. And it's nice to know I'm not the only one who's fills seem to come and go either. I'm making a mental list of all the wonderful things in my life, my grandson being first on the list, my band, my health, improvement in the health of my husband, my wonderful daughters. I have a lot to be thankful for. Problems that seem insurmountable aren't most of the time. Things will get better. Now to call the doctor's office and schedule a fill and maybe an appointment with the counselor! Hugs to everyone.

Thank you guys so much. It really helped just to get it all out and "talk" about it. Just doing that has helped me get up and get more organized with my job search and make some lists already. And yes, Marie -- you're so wonderfully logical -- it will help me a lot to just think of one step at a time, one day at a time, when it comes to re-attacking my weight loss. I do need to visit you guys on a regular basis to keep me on track. I've had 5 fills I think and I'm at 2.00 cc's. I got the last one just two weeks ago. Sometimes I think I'm not tight enough and sometimes I think I just eat the wrong things. What does it really "feel like" to be as full as you should be? Do you "know" when it's finally right? How much food should be enough? And Dr. Johnell's office is still so supportive. Are you still getting your fills there Kim? Cutting off my daughter's financial support has been both a burden and a relief Penni. I know before they're totally stable (if ever) I'll give in and help them again and I know I'm probably not doing them any favors. There's just no one else who can help them. It's their wedding we're paying for in July and it's just too hard to postpone it. Lots of things are already paid for and ordered. She already postponed the original date from February to July. I don't dislike her fiance, I just wonder (do all parents do this?) if she couldn't have done better. Just for instance, he barely graduated high school and she's a college graduate. Thus the reason for her ability to get a job more quickly than him. And unfortunately for him, our first son-in-law, father of our grandchild and who lost his mother, is such a perfect fit into our family. We just love him. He's so hard working, mature and personable. He's a hard act to follow. I have given a lot of thought to going some other route career-wise and I may just do that if I can hold on long enough. Unemployment checks don't come fast enough do they! Sorry for the unburdening. I just thought this would be the perfect place for the support that I need for at least one of my problems. I never expected such loving responses about everything else.

Great news Kim, I was banded by Johnell and didn't think he did fills for other surgeon's patients. Glad to find out that he does. I'm due for my first one Dec. 10 and I feel just like you. I'll be the only one who's slow to feel restriction and slow to lose. Right now (4 weeks from surgery) I don't feel much restriction at all and have to remind myself to watch how much I eat.

I just realized that was a dumb question, since I found the "sticky" but I can't get to the site.

Hi, I tried to get to this site and it seems to no longer be there. I can never get in enough Protein without a shake or two. Could someone tell me how to find a "sticky"? Thanks

Good luck Ryan! You'll do great I'm sure.

Hi Mary, I was banded by Dr. Johnell on October 28. I'm just getting used to my band. So far have lost about 15 lbs. but none in the last week. I "lurk" a lot here too and learn all sorts of things from this site. I discovered there's a good reason for following the eating rules and will certainly go back to them as best I can. I'm not filled yet and I think I might have been eating a little too much just because it goes down fine. How did you do with the first few "very strict" weeks? Congratulations on your loss. I too hope to get to 160 or so from a high of about 250. I just want to be able to say I am no longer obese!

You guys crack me up. I needed that laugh Penni. That "sustained fart" was a hoot. What I've noticed more after banding is not quite a burp but like a roll of gas bubbles coming up.

Hi Kristy, Welcome to the club. I'm a new bandster too. Banded on October 28 and have lost about 15 lbs. too. It's great to get into a whole new set of numbers isn't it! We're off to a great start! I understand your concern about the heart problems. I have been through similar issues with my husband. He had his mitral valve repaired in 1993 and now has cardiomyopathy. He has always kept himself in great shape with running and the repair surgery went very well. We were shocked to be told this year that he had the myopathy, probably from a viral infection he had two years ago. The heart seems to be forever susceptible to invaders once you've had a problem with it. Being in good shape is what's kept him going. His doctor wonders how he does what he does. You're smart to take care of yourself now. Health was the big reason I did this for myself as well. I'm 52 with a husband, two daughters and a wonderful grandson I want to be around for. Good luck. This is a wonderful site for all kinds of support and information.

Congratulations Audrey! I was so excited when I got approved too and then just had my surgery Oct 28.

Hi all, Got my band on Thursday and I'm feeling pretty good :Bunny :Bunny . Just that port site incision hurts and makes it hard to get in and out of bed. Johnell keeps us on full liquids for 2 weeks, then puree for two weeks. So far it hasn't been bad. I'm sure I'll be wanting something substantial sometime soon though. Still bloated but no unbearable gas pains. I keep moving around as much as I can. All in all excited to be on my way to weight loss! Yeah!

Thanks guys for all the good wishes and good luck to all of us who were banded recently. There are new ones everyday it seems! I feel better each day. Tummy is tender and I'm sorry but I'm real tired of liquids already! Bad, bad. But I'm sticking to it. Now I know why you guys complained about the nasty Protein drinks. They didn't bother me so much before but they sure are tasting nasty now. Suggestions for something other than Atkins shakes are very welcome. I know you've posted some. I'll have to go looking. It'll be over soon and I'll be at the pureed stage! Who'd have thought I'd look forward to baby food?! I took off from work until next Monday and am very glad I did. If I'm tired I can take a nap and the best thing of all is sleeping late if I want!

Thanks Michelle. We'll be cruising down the same road at the same time! We're going to do great. Happy rebirth to you too!

Great post Marie, That's really what it's like. I hope to be out there next year hiking too and feeling good about it. Who'd have thought that in only five months you'd be down 50 lbs. and life would be so different! I can't wait.

Just finished reading all Ryan's posts about pre-surgery testing results. I was contacted by both my surgeon and my PCP regarding my tests today and am discouraged too. They've detected low Iron levels (what's that from?). Got a prescription for that. There's some kind of "blip" or something in my EKG - I'm headed to a cardiologist Monday. And lastly, some oddball thing showed up on my chest x-ray (never smoked). So I'm up for a cat scan for that on Thursday. Hoping that's just a film problem as someone suggested. I do agree that it's a good thing my surgeon is thorough too but it stinks to get old. These are just the kinds of problems I was hoping to cut off at the pass - guess I took a little too long. I am more than ready for my Oct. 28 scheduled surgery and hope it's not delayed. I am so looking forward to having an improved body and better health. Marie - when were you in RMNP hiking? We live not far from there.

Thank you guys for all your suggestions. I had the last of my pre-op retesting today and everything is fine. :banana I'm a go on Thursday barring anything else getting in the way. Ryan I had that sandpaper and alcohol thingy today! Ouch! Turned out okay though so I guess the irritation was worth it. Three more days and counting.

You guys are such an inspiration. I am so looking forward to being in the 50+ lbs. gone forever club. It must feel wonderful. Marie you need to post a picture! You must have at least one with an elk!

Ohmygoodness, I can't believe it's only 6 short days away. I hadn't thought of it that way! I can start thinking of what I need to do now that my husband is doing well. One shock and the heart was beating properly again! Modern medicine is amazing. I have sugarless popsicles, some Protein drinks, lots of protein powders, lots of tea. I need to look at my lists from all you experienced people. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that I'm not postponed. I'll have my Mom and my husband to run to the store for me thankfully. I need to get Gas-X for sure - make sure my heating pad is working properly. What else? I feel like I'm packing for a trip and I am! Getting ready for a new life! Marie so glad you and your husband are doing so well. They can drive ya nuts but what would we do without them! Thanks for all the support you all.

Rose and Kay, Nice to meet you. It's always great to hear from some other Johnell patients. Rose, how have you been doing so far? I have another Dr J friend who was banded Oct. 5. She says that 5 week waiting period to be filled has been a little hard for her. She's healed quickly though and feels good. Have you been able to lose any weight while you're waiting? Kay my pre-op appointment is Oct. 27. I'm going to an afternoon class on Tuesday, Oct. 26 (I think it's required). Anyway I'm so excited. I'm just hoping I don't get delayed. I've had a few pre-op tests that need to be looked at again! Darn. Good luck both of you and keep me posted with how things are going. E-mail me at home if you like - ddp652@aol.com.

:banana :banana I just had to let you all know I've been approved! I'm being banded by Dr. Johnell in Greeley, Colorado on October 28. I've already done all my pre-op testing. I'm so excited, but a little scared too. I just pray I can stick to good eating habits and maximize my loss. I'll take any suggestions I can get. I've been reading all the comments about how hard it can be and all I can say is it's got to be better than gaining every year. I think this site is great. You all share everything (even if it's not band related LOL) and it's so helpful to us who are soon to be banded or newbies. Wish me luck hopeful1

That's the way I have to look at this as a little curve in the road to better things. It's hard waiting to hear what the results are though. I should consider myself lucky in a lot of ways. My husband has serious cardiomyopathy - weakening/failure of the heart muscle - and has to go for a shock treatment to his heart tomorrow. So at this point I am more concerned for him than what's going on with me. Part of my motivation for getting the surgery is to be as healthy as I could for him as well. He loves hiking in the mountains and so far has still been able to do it and I want to make sure I can go with him for as long as he can go. Sounds like you had a wonderful trip Marie. Let me know when you're coming back!

Thank you all for your support. I'm sorry to whine. Ryan you are a wonderful wordsmith. I could feel myself in that car! Scary. And I believe you are probably right about the politics of it. This procedure gives new hope to a lot of people and it's a good thing to keep the statistics as good as they can be. I'm just hanging in there. One test is tomorrow, so I'll have one more to go and I hopefully will be on my way to a better body and better health. Hoping this is just a bump in the road. I will let you know how things go and appreciate all the information and pats on the back I get here. Marie, I live about 45 mins. from Estes Park, an hour or so from the park itself. We go up there fairly frequently, especially this time of year when the elk are bugling. What areas did you hike in? I especially love to go up to Bear Lake. And yes it is part of my reason to do the surgery to be able to enjoy the wonderful opportunities for hiking there. If you plan another trip next year maybe we could do a hike together with our improved bodies!

So sorry Lainie, That's my biggest fear about now. I'm scheduled for next Thursday and had some stuff come up with my pre-op testing. Just remember it's not canceled, just postponed. Your date will be here before you know it and I hope so will mine. Good luck