Stacie

Hi everyone, I haven't posted much since my leak. I am just getting so frustrated. I had an upper GI two weeks ago and it was still there, the surgeon advanced my drain an inch, hoping that would help the leak heal up. Went back today for another Upper GI and it is still there. I am so completely ready to lose my mind. What can I do? How long will this take? There just isn't a place for me. I definitely can't relate to anyone who had surgery in Dec. ETA: I am hardly believe it has been over 2 months since I have taken a bite of food. 2 months without chewing a single morsel. I" am not sure when I am healed if I will be afraid of food or if I will eat everything in sight!! Other crummy things: I still have loose stools, so I don't know if my c-diff is back or never left and I still have tons of nausea. I take liquid zophran through my J-tube for it, but it gives me a headache every time. I don't even know what to say. I am just falling apart. I don't see why they open my stomach back up and attach a stomach from someone else having this surgery. It would just be two staple lines. Kinda joking - I just want my life back so badly. Thanks for listening. I know many of you have been thinking of me and praying for me and it means so much, sorry taht I am very rarely up for much conversation. =(

Hi all, I am still around. Surgeon pulled my drain back a little more yesterday. On Friday I will be doing another upper GI with the surgeon present. Next step sounds like EGD with fibrin or stent. Surgeon is reviewing my chart with the GI do who does the stents. I will talk to him more Friday. Thank you Cajun for the PM, and for everyone for their prayers. I am doing fine. Doing a lot of research (Bariatric journals,etc) and then get scared and stop. Just staying positive... hoping for no leak this Friday. And in more fun, my little girl (3 years) broke her arm last night, as DH and I were headed to a funeral. It is just a bit humorous if you think about it!! I feel proud to be doing my part for the health care system!!

Congratulations on your anniversary and all the lost weight! Wow ~ you look amazing!!!! Enjoy the new you!

I love these!! Totally lol at the crossing legs and needing to wedge your foot in somewhere! I hate that! Everyone is sitting down and I have to calculate where I can sit and use something to wedge my foot to keep it from flinging out! And shopping, yes, it would be fun to shop with all my friends, who are all thin and in shape, and be able to buy clothing! Instead of just picking up a pair of socks!! I am so looking forward to getting out of the plus sizes and the ugly clothes at Lane Bryant. Oh, I would love to wear sleeveless tops again! Also for me, I know so many have a hard time giving up food, but I am so excited to go out to parties, etc and just pick at a couple things, instead of spending time and energy trying to eat everything in sight without anyone noticing. I want to live a life where I am not controlled by food. Where I can spend my time thinking of something besides food. I want to have confidence to go volunteer in my children's school, without the self loathing. I want to go places and not spend the entire time thinking of how I am the biggest one in the room. Mostly I want to experience life without thinking about my weight continuosly. Without worrying about if my muffin top is showing, or trying to cover up my arms, or not wanting to do a family activity (going to the beach, taking a bike ride, etc) becaue of how I will look and feel. Ok, mine is so long, I should just make it a blog!

I really want to buy a cute dress, but I haven't lost much yet (and not sure when I will be able to start losing) Have you bought clothes before they fit? Like a goal outfit? I have done this beofre with other diets and it is always motiviating to keep working to be able to get into something you love. This is the dress, but in real life it is a rich bright red, not coral colored. It is so cute and has sleeves, but I have no idea what size I would buy, etc. It seems like a dumb and silly thing to do, but I really love it. Just wondering if anyone else has done this?

Yes Shontel, that is the best thing to hear ever. I am starving. Some head hunger and some real hunger. I am glad there is still hope for some of the hunger to subside.

Ha! Me too! Bins full of awesome clothes. We will have to see if they are still in style when I lose! I agree with you on Stacey and Clintons philosophy though, good point. I forget to add the dress, except it is a gorgeous red!

How tiny are your sips? Apparently I was taking the tiniest sips ever. At about 4 weeks out, my doctor said I could drink a little more than I was at one time. He suggested about an ounce at a time, but then to wait about 15 minutes to take another drink. It made all the difference for me.

I was told to avoid gum because you swallow alot of air when chewing gum (potentially filling you up and hence not getting your protein in). Not sure if this is true. But I would wiat a while in case of accidentely swallowing it.

I love it! And I totally agree with Cajun, but there is nothing wrong with feeling good about yourself!! I am hoping to be able to take a family picture this fall to send out Christmas cards. I never let myself be in pictures and I would just love to feel good abbut myself and, hey, if my ex boyfriend (still friends with his family) happens to see it, all the better!

Thanks so much everyone. And thanks to Tiffy for all that info. I am going in this afternoon to have my drain advanced again. I was on tpn at the hospital for the first week. Then they put in a feeding tube (directly into my small intensines) I didn't drink anything in the hospital, but I asked him again yesterday and he thought I should continue with the Water. I will ask again today. I have only drank water, nothing else by mouth, though I do brush my teeth. =) Thanks again for your good thoughts and all your ideas for my to think thru. I wish I had more of an advocate. I just can't wait til this is over!

How exciting! You have already come so far, this will be such a big milestone though!!

My surgeon is supposed to be calling me soon. I want to ask him some specific questions, any you guys can think of? 1. I took vancocin capsules for three weeks. Maybe these kept it open? They are big 2. I am drinking about 15 ounces of Water each day, could this be keeping the leak from healing? 3. He did try to fix it during an EGD with a patch of glue mixed with my blood. It seemed to do the trick for about 5 days. Maybe we could try that again? What would you ask? I agree with you Tif, it is such a mess, I sure wish they could have fixed it right away, that was their plan/goal. But maybe it is different because my leak wasn't found for over 2 weeks. So I was enjoying pudding, broth, Protein shakes,etc. When they went in for emergency surgery they were most concerned aobut the massive infection in my abdomen and making sure I lived. They were unable to locate the leak at that time (2 top surgeons in the room). But it seems crazy that it still isn't healed. I don't have diabetes, smoke, overall very healthy (except this darn weight). Ugh! Thanks for all your prayers everyone.

I am still burping a ton (after any tiny sip). And still massively nauseous. I wonder if the Gas X helps with the burping? If only I could time travel and not have done this! I wish you the best and sorry I don't have any advice.

Thanks to Tiffykins!!! My hubby just picked up the Extreme Milk chocolate from whey Optimum and I am drinking it! I have to be honest, I don't LOVE it, but since the alternative of the dozens of others I have tried is gagging, this is pure success! I am so happy I will get in some Protein today. I am thinking of trying to freeze some into a slushie. I just had to share. Also a 5 lb container is on sale at GNC for $42 ($20 off) So Double Woot! :lol0: :thumbup: :001_wub:

Well, I am so sorry to answer your question honestly. But I have NEVER regretted anything more in my life. I am one of the unlucky ones that ended up with a leak despite following doctors orders TO A "T" and researching a surgeon with a very low leak rate. I am exactly one month out and my life is turned upside down beyond belief. I was in the hospital for two weeks, am now eating through a feeding tube and have no idea how long any of this insanity will last. I look in the mirror each and every day crying and asking myself if I really hated myself THIS MUCH. I am 5'3" and 240 pre surgery. I would give my life savings right now to have have my old stomach back without a second thought. I am a young mom though, with three little children under 5 years old so this leak has been horrific for my family. If I was older, and without young children, maybe it would have been less traumatic. Please understand that although the risk of leaks is very small, it is a risk that could happen and be prepared for that. Best of luck in your decision.

Anyone go through some sudden nausea? I had some in the hospital and very mild the first couple days out, now it is back and I can't even go into the kitchen. Smelling anything at all just about gives me the dry heaves. At night I wake up with an awful taste in my mouth. I brush my teeth before bed, once during the middle of the night, and again in the morning, but I can't get rid of this weird taste. Almost like some Soup I had about 4 days ago, I keep burping it up. I also have a burning feeling from my mouth to my sternum, just uncomfortable. I called the nurse and she said to keep taking as much Fluid as I can, if I can't get enough in to come to the hospital. But we are having a snowstorm and my surgeon is in surgery... So far I have had a popsicle today. It was all right, I choked it down. I am going to try something else now. Just no desire for any food or drink... Should I call back and ask for something for the nausea? She said I could take tums... Any suggestions? Thanks!

I want to be prepared to talk to my surgeon at my post op visit. I currently am taking Flinestones multi prevacid solutab And will be adding these later this week: Iron B12 vit D Should I take a sublingual b12? My b12 is bigger... What about Calcium? Thanks for any advice!!

That sounds like me too, I lost weight in my early 20s and was jogging. I would so love to do it again. Or rather, I WILL do it again! :hurray: I am still on full liquids. I am SO done with it. The only things on my list right now are: cream of wheat, yogurt, sf pudding, and blenderized Soup (and then Protein shakes and clear liquids). Tomorrow I meet with my nutritionist and am going to ask for cottage cheese and refried Beans, I don't really see the difference with those if I thin the beans out and blend the cc. Today I had a rough patch, same problems with nausea. Nothing (that I am supposed to be taking in) sounds appealing. I went to the fridge during the day and I would dry heave at the thought of yogurt. I think I am pretty dehydrated too. I really want to get past this over the weekend. I called the doctor and she wants me to call back in the morning, or go to the ER if I can't get any fluids in. I really want to weigh only once a week. I don't want to focus too much on the scale. I really don't feel a need to lose too fast, I really want to focus on healthy eating habits and following the program. I am thinking I will weigh in on Thursdays, since that was my surgery day. I hope you are feeling better and getting that gas out. Are you tolerating any more mushies? What meds is the doctor want to try out? I am going to ask for Zofran if the nausea doesn't subside some. take care!

Yay!! 20 lbs down! Congrats! Enjoy your refried beans!! :hurray: Sorry I hijacked your thread so much Wisconsin Gal

Congratulations! You look Gorgeous! And wow, are you busy! Great job and thanks for the update, I am two weeks out and you are an inspiration to me!

Wisconsin Gal (we need to meet up sometime!! Do you make it into Milwaukee much? We could do some shopping in Johnson Creek sometime =) Your intake looks good and you are getting in so much protein without a shake?! That is awesome!!!

I see, so less than two weeks out you will get a few more items of variety, :001_tt2: What is the reason you have to wait two months for the fish, etc? I would think that is easier than string cheese? I am just curious, is all. I am not supposed to try those items until 3 weeks out, but I might ask my nutritionist if I can have a little refried beans and cottage cheese at 2.5 weeks, it doesn't seem than different than pudding to me! Why are you taking your blood sugars, were they low after surgery? 68 and 70 are a bit low, but not too bad, right? I think under 55 is the worry/danger range. I am usually in my low 70s and they are very happy with that. I wonder if I am mildly hypoglycemic now and that is causing me to feel really crummy the last two days, no energy, kinda out of it, etc. food for thought... Good luck at your appts tomorrow!!! :001_smile: