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I'm 3+ years out. Almost always make me ill or uncomfortable: pasta, rice, flour tortillas. Sometimes make me ill or uncomfortable: potatoes (any way) and bread - I include biscuits, waffles, pancakes, etc. here because even now I can only have a few bites of these foods before I'm too full. And I simply cannot eat anything overly sweet. I scrape frosting off cake, avoid cheesecake if it's not plain and skip syrup on my two or three bites of challah french toast. ~Cheri

I can't watch it at all - none of those shows where they eat massive portions of food. They make me feel incredibly ill. I hope that Man Vs. Food guy looks better. I caught part of an episode more than a year ago and watched him red-faced and sweating while he ate enough food for six people and had the sad thought that one day he was going to die of a heart attack while eating a sandwich the size of a bus. ~Cheri

I'm three years out. My capacity did just about double around nine months to a year out. Before people start panicking, what does that mean? It means instead of 4 oz. of food I could fit about 8 oz. That left me room to eat a wider variety of foods, work some healthy, fibrous veggies in and to eat my Protein at every meal without relying so heavily on shakes. I still do a shake a day to up my protein, of course, but I don't have to anymore. If I stick to dense protein alone I'm lucky to get 3-4 oz. in at one meal. That's still eating like a bird. Caveat? Unfortunately, restriction (for the long haul) really only applies to good food choices and things like bread, Pasta and rice. Crispy junk foods slide right down, but that's another story. ~Cheri

It took me a long time to be able to reach both my calorie and Water goals. But the simple answer is that if you're awake, you should be sipping. It's almost impossible to do otherwise, at least in the very beginning. ~Cheri

Hugs, Susan, and thank you for a great (brave!) post! I, too, can say I posted almost the same things as the OP around a year out. I totally embrace moderation and do not want to eat on a restrictive diet for the rest of my life. But guess what? I'm STILL a food addict. I still use food to cope, I still have the ability to binge or overindulge and my sleeve, while it controls my portions (of dense protein!), does not, unfortunately, control my consumption of popcorn, Cookies, chips and basically any other junk food I'd like to eat. And of course, at 3+ years out I know exactly how long I need to wait between meals to eat around my sleeve. So instead of one piece of pizza, I can easily push it and consume two or three if I choose to do it. There is a very, very thin line to walk if you want to do moderation. Do I eat a piece of candy once in a while? Yep. I'm a baker. Do I eat my own cakes, cookies and pastries? Yep. But you know what? Maybe six days out of seven it's easy to say no or to eat a small portion. But that seventh day sometimes is a challenge. It's those days you need to watch. They happen to all of us. So saying you can stop at one now doesn't mean you can stop at one later. My sleeve only helps me eat small portions if I choose to eat the right foods. A whole damn sack of Oreos would fit if I let them! Regain is far more common than you think. We did not get obese because we couldn't follow a diet short term. We got obese and stayed that way because we have poor habits that are ingrained and incredibly difficult to break. We're champion dieters, but we're not good at maintaining. Nobody here woke up twelve pounds overweight and decided for surgery. Every single one of us has lost and gained on other programs only to wind up here with a sleeve. So yeah - some folks get a little crazy about restriction and moderation. Because it's more challenging for some people than others, but it's not an easy hurdle for anyone here. How you feel at six months out is way different than even one year out, let alone more than three out like me. Some foods will trigger people and they avoid them for the long haul because of that. And many, many, many people get plain sloppy after a year out. They hit goal, consider themselves done and don't peek around the boards again until they've got a 20 pound regain to work on. Or worse, they never come back. So yep, caution with moderation for sure. Because those good choices get harder to make and that sleeve only goes so far for you. It used to be 70% sleeve helping me lose. Now it's 70% me keeping me on track - the sleeve only helps me IF I MAKE THE RIGHT CHOICE IN THE FIRST PLACE! ~Cheri Oh, and it's kind of unfair to post things on a public forum with the expectation that you're only going to get replies that agree with you. Butter might sound negative to you, because you expected a bunch of "Amen!" posts in return. But to me? That's the voice of reason, blunt as he may be. He knows what he's talking about - all of us vets do. It's easy to skip the posts that you don't want to hear because everyone wants rainbows and sparkles and hopes for an easy journey to goal (and of course, a permanent stay there) but we're here precisely to help people with things like this, because it really IS different the farther out you get and if we don't share our experience, you simply won't hear the other side of the story.

CGJ, you look AWESOME! I can't believe you look so good so soon after surgery. Congrats on being back in the states. Don't sweat the appetite. Plain and simple, you're healing and your body needs fuel to do it. Up those protein shakes, maybe add in some smoothies and get online with Peapod or something and have them deliver you some veggies! OD, good on you for the cake, and happy belated birthday. Cathy, enjoy the trip! Relaxation sounds so wonderful - what's it like to relax again? Laura - I am glad you posted. I know we've talked about it but those things that make us who we are (including the fat people with disordered eating we used to be) are all still there. And it's a challenge at times. I'm sorry about your brother. It's inadequate and doesn't express it completely but it just plain sucks. Hugs to GT and Cathy on missing their parents. Georgia, thank you especially for your post. We have a very troubled child (my stepdaughter) and it's been a long four years with her in and out of rehab, in and out of suicide watch...both my husband and I have buried children at one point and it's been so incredibly defeating to see how all four parents are absolutely unable to help this girl. We're half prepared for that call one day that she either succeeded or that she overdosed. I hope that some day she can be clean and sober. It's so hard to match up the girl we see now with the incredibly bright, optimistic and ambitious girl she was just five years ago. It's heartbreaking. As for me, this is also a hard time of the year, which just feeds into that negative cycle. My daughter would be fourteen years old at the beginning of November. From 1 September to 16 January is what my husband and I call the down time of the year. Everyone else is thrilled with the holidays and family gatherings and we're "celebrating" birthdays and death anniversaries for children that aren't with us. It sucks. On a more positive note I'm down a touch on the scale. Not much but it's a start. I know it's not in line with 5:2, so if ya'll want to give me the boot I understand, but I'm doing no days over 1,000 calories right now. My feast days are 1,000 calories, give or take, and my fasts will be 500 calories. I really feel like I don't shed weight well until I'm under 900 calories a day, but I figured I'd give this a shot. I expect I'll see a larger drop immediately out of the gate and then it will taper, but hopefully, HOPEFULLY it will be something I can maintain. I only have seven measly pounds. I really want them gone. Then I need to focus on toning because I've got a gold sparkly gown to wear next year (unless she changes her mind) and I'd hate to look floppy in it. Oh, and thanks for the compliments on my little Shevi. People don't believe me but honestly, she's harder as a single than my twins ever were at this age. I'm hoping that means she'll be an agreeable toddler! Best to everyone. Hugs all around. No fast today but I got my feast planned to the letter so I'm going to stick to the program and prove I'm in charge of my diet. ~Cheri

Yes. When I was new there weren't many old timers hanging around. There was no vets board. There was no real picture of life in the 2+ years timeframe. And I was one of "those people" that insisted that the only way to regain is if you try really hard and overeat or binge all the time. It's not true! Your body is a freaking miracle and it will adapt to ANYTHING, and that includes learning how to pack on a few pounds because you ate an extra couple hundred calories each day over the weekend. I find I have to be stricter with my intake 3+ years out. Once I'm in my window, I pretty well stick to a five pound range, IF I stick to doing a 6:1 or 5:2 method. Regain isn't an issue if I weigh daily and pick a day or two a week to hit the shakes hard and go all Protein. But loss? Losing seven pounds is all I want, post pregnancy. And I've been trying for MONTHS. It's hard. It gets harder to lose the weight the longer you're small. It gets easier to pack pounds on the farther out you get. This is to anyone relying wholly on their sleeve to make good choices: STOP. Start doing it yourself. Because my sleeve can hold a lot of the wrong foods. If I wanted, I could eat a slice of pizza every few hours and still pack on a few pounds. It addresses quantity, but only quantity of good choices. Do not rely on your sleeve to make those good choices for you. I still hesitate to say I've had a regain. I got pregnant, and am having trouble losing those last stupid few pounds. But this is not the easy, effortless slide it was early out. Do not for one minute think that you'll be able to avoid regains and make good choices based upon the capacity of your sleeve alone. It takes effort, it takes a huge amount of willpower and it takes never-ending diligence to stay in your healthy weight range. Three years out and no food is off limits. Some foods make me uncomfortable, but I can eat anything I want. And if I go sloppy on diet, I can easily fit in upwards of 2,000 calories a day, tiny sleeve be damned. I can easily eat upwards of 2 cups of food in one sitting if I choose the foods that will slide. In the end? I have a tool. A darn good tool that I'm incredibly grateful to have. But it really boils down to me vs. the food. The sleeve only works if you work it, and that gets more tiring, more boring and harder to do the farther out from surgery you get. We still get to succeed. I don't want to be defeatist. But don't think that it's as easy as it is that first nine months for the whole haul. It's not! Challenges are very common around one year post op, and losing regains of even ten piddly pounds can take more than half a year once you're farther out. ~Cheri

Quick check in, hope everyone is well. Feast day but somehow it's winding up like a fast day. I'm at 220 calories and it's well past lunch. Dinner menu: challah, matzo ball soup, roasted chicken, spinach and strawberry salad, chickpea salad, green salad, roasted brussels sprouts. I'm on a veggie kick and trying to teach the family that you don't need potatoes! In any case, I might end today closer to 700 calories, IF I eat a small piece of challah. Otherwise, I'm going to come in like a fast day, but at the rate I'm going I figure that can't hurt. OD, that date would have bothered me. It's a shame he seems to have a hangup about larger people. Was he formerly fat himself? I met a woman that does the SAME thing, and it turned out that she was really incredibly judgmental of anyone that hadn't lost the weight because she managed to do it herself. Hang in there for the weekend, ladies. Not sure about the rest of you but I find them harder - mostly because I'm up later and the snack demons bother me in the evening! I made some hummus today, though, so I'm planning to crunch if the desire to munch gets too strong. Oh, and a picture of my adorable little setback follows. She's such a stinker. I hate losing and regaining these last ten pounds but this little turkey was well worth it, even if I'm frustrated at times. Try, all times. But c'mon, isn't she cute? Seven months old this week, can you believe how time flies? ~Cheri

Almost all of us are addicts, even if many are in denial before surgery! I was absolutely in denial about my disordered eating. I was certain that surgery was going to be my fix because my issues were completely due to insulin resistance (and type 2 diabetes), hormones and genetics. Fast forward to reality and nope, disordered eating doesn't disappear with surgery. My experience is that it gets much easier to deal with in the early months post op. All the way up to at least a year out, it was very easy to say no to food. Eating was a chore. I was really able to focus on changing my bad habits in for better ones. But the sad truth is that it never goes away. We are truly like alcoholics. We don't get to start binges or poor habits again without repercussions, and possibly a downhill slide that ends with the foulest of post-WLS words: REGAIN. I'm three years out. I was so sure somewhere in my second year that I'd beaten my addiction, that my habits were fully changed and that I was absolutely in charge. And don't get me wrong, because it's still far easier to stay on top of my habits or to break the cycle than it was with my whole stomach. But it's still a challenge sometimes. I used to think I had a skinny girl inside me that wanted out. The truth is more that there's a really hungry fat girl inside me, and she wants to eat all the food, all the time. It doesn't matter to her if I'm physically hungry. My obesity did not stem from actual hunger! It stemmed from years of poor habits, binges, overeating and an absolute inability to walk away from the junk food. And that, my friends, doesn't go away post op. Yes, you can replace those habits and those cravings. And yes, it's much easier to do it immediately post op. But the longer I'm around here the more I see that it's actually a rare few that chug along more than two years post op demon free. The rest of us still fight our food demons, and while it's an easier win than it was pre-op, the sad truth for some of us is that the fight doesn't end. ~Cheri

I have to weigh daily. It may bounce around due to hormones or whatever but I have to do it. If I don't, I'll stop doing it altogether and that leads to regains! It's unfortunate that I still allow the scale to upset my day sometimes, though. Some days it doesn't bother me and other days I get completely frustrated. But better that than denial and a potential regain! ~Cheri

Congrats! It's been a tough road but you're still going strong and should be proud of that (and of your accomplishments!) - keep it up, you're inspiring to the rest of us! ~Cheri

Almost all men are improved by facial hair. Just sayin'. My husband needs to get out of the Army and grow me a beard! So yes to the idea that shots get wider as we get smaller. I now show my entire upper body in my picture. Note the handy infant accessory. It says: "Yes, I'm not quite at goal but look! I just had a baby so it's okay!" Plus, "Hello?! Boobs here, don't pay attention to the waistline!" And if a woman doesn't know how to take a picture that minimizes her chins, smoothes out her bulges and flatters her as much as possible, she's going to post a picture of her kids, a nature scene or a funny phrase instead. It took me a long while to feel I'd lost enough chins to post a picture! Oh, and I was pretty rotund at 21 and avoided the camera like the plague. Most of my photos from my fat days are of me grimacing at the camera or hiding behind tall people. I really regret this, because I have no photographic evidence of myself at my largest. I'd love to do a side by side of me at 280 pounds and me in my current 140s but alas, I hid from the camera and don't have photos! Plus, since Butter and Laura can, I can too: That's 2010, 2011 and July 2013. I currently weigh exactly what I weighed in the middle picture. It just looks better in a custom corset gown! (Then again, doesn't everything?) ~Cheri

Any idea about the ages for childcare there? The website doesn't go into detail. I don't currently work out - I'm three years out and had a baby in March so I'm trying to lose those last ten pounds and really need to try and build some muscle, too. Plus, you know, stop being a lazy slug! If you're still looking for a workout buddy, I might be able to do that if the childcare makes a membership worthwhile. I'm terrible about getting to the gym or working out if it's just me, but if I have friendly competition and have another person or a group for motivation I do really well. Oh, and I highly recommend anyone interested in local support join the FB page (it's several posts back) and come out to the meeting at Joia's on Sunday! If I do say so myself, we're a great group. ~Cheri

Nice to see you, Daisy! You look wonderful. Congrats on the bonus loss, Georgia. Laura, I get it. I really, really get it. Because there are times when this seems easy but it's only easy for me when I don't eat! It just takes one bad choice to wind up on a slide of them and it then takes days of NOT EATING (when all I want to do is eat) to get that out of my system again. I want to say, yeah,hooray, I'm normal. I mean, I look normal. Do I want to be thinner, well, yeah. But I look like a normal gal that never had a weight problem. I know that I told myself at 250 pounds that I'd be thrilled just to be under 200 pounds but it turns out I lied! I want to be thinner and it's so damned hard to get there. And yes, I feel just as frustrated as you sometimes, so you are not alone. I hate to be so negative, too, because for this thread is almost entirely full of optimism and it's a nice safe place to be. But yeah - I only have these eight stupid pounds to get back to the bottom of my goal window and I CANNOT LOSE THEM! And I keep gaining little bit here, little bit there but I'm actually UP from where I was a few months ago and that sucks, too. I think it's just harder than I expected to wrap my head around the fact that I may look normal but I'm never going to be normal. I'm always going to be a food addict. The Halloween candy in my living room? I don't even feel physical hunger and every night I walk in there and stare at those bags wanting to open them up! It's crazy. I have such a hard time sticking to a protein heavy diet now, likely because I have been doing it for more than three years in the hopes that some day I'll finally get to my goal weight and stay there. But no, no such luck. I hate that I've accomplished so much and still feel like I'm falling short. I'm am really, truly grateful for Elisheva but my word, I had no idea how much of a set back having a baby would be. Half of me wants to hop on the pregnancy board and shout to those women, "Don't do it!! Just don't do it!" but of course I would never do that. I'm just tired. I've been doing this for a while now and it does get old. I really miss that easy maintenance window I used to keep. In fairness? My body seems to have found a new window. I bounce between 141-145 and it doesn't matter if I'm downing protein shakes and hard boiled eggs or if I'm eating candy, bread and bowls of cereal. My body is happy here. I'm not, but my body seems fully intent on staying here. I think the only way for me to break past this is to cut the calories down, drop 5:2 for the time being and get 700-900 calories a day for a few weeks until I'm there. But ugh...that just sounds like too much work, and I'm feeling far too defeated to take that on! Fast day - protein coffee in a few moments, then protein, protein, protein all day and night. Anyone else so sick of water they can't seem to drink it? I feel thirsty but just can't take plain water anymore - I've been using my infuser but even that's gotten old. Time to break out the drops again, I guess! ~Cheri

Hey folks. OD - sorry about your break up. But honestly, as hard as it is to be alone, it's better than settling and inviting different unhappiness into your life. Good luck getting out there and meeting new people. Have fun with it. Allow yourself some time to be sad for what might have been but stay strong and don't allow yourself to eat emotionally! You've done well on 5:2 - don't compromise your success. Brown - you're not the only person that justifies healthy snacks or late night nibbles. Night is hardest for me, too. Especially if I let a certain snack time become a habit! I have to keep it all over the place or I have a terrible time. For me, the habit is harder than kicking the desire to eat - most often I eat because it's time to eat or an established habit, not because I'm hungry! Hang in there! Great job Cathy! And Georgia, you're the queen here - you've had amazing success! GT, it's the little things, isn't it? When I got back stateside, the sheer selection in the stores was overwhelming and I wasn't nearly as remote a location as you. I just spun around in circles because everywhere I looked there were CHOICES! And I drink a protein coffee every single morning. YUM. So, my scale is the enemy but what else is new? We're sick around here again (round three in 2.5 weeks for the three kids and myself!) and lack of sleep has me up a touch. I actually saw 147 on the scale the other day, and I can't blame hormones (at least not directly) as I finally, FINALLY got to see the end of that never-ending period. TMI, but whatever. Seriously, any woman that has a cycle for nearly 40 days gets to complain about it! I'm at 145 again today. I really, really, really want to see at least 141 again. That was the top end of my maintenance window. I'm having such a hard time though. I had no idea that this was going to be so hard and so, well, out of my control, really. Because I feel like even when I do the "right" things I'm not losing, you know? Today I had a protein coffee for breakfast and I'm having an egg white and chicken sausage scramble for lunch in a few hours. Boring old chicken with steamed veggies and a salad for dinner. I'm fasting, can you tell? No snacks. NO SNACKS. I need to nip the snacking in the bud, because I find myself wanting to eat all night long, even when I'm not hungry. Water is my new snack. Lots and lots of water. Hope everyone is doing well. I'm off. I'm fighting a chest cold and I got the cold virus in my eye - can you believe that? Now I've got this horrible swollen, red eye to accompany my runny nose and my cough. Lovely. I look a mess, that's for certain. Elisheva has a cold, too, poor thing. She was up all night with a runny/stuffy nose. So here's hoping a nap (a nice, long two hour one!) is in our future. Because Mama needs a break, I swear. ~Cheri

Finished up my fast day. Splurged at the end and had a bit of vanilla yogurt and some protein granola - clocked in at 542, but close enough for me to be happy! I just wanted to up those protein numbers a bit and wanted to join in while the family had dessert. Homemade apple pie for them - yogurt for me. It works, and I didn't even want the pie, anyway. Feasting tomorrow, but it's Shabbat dinner so it's always a feast. Hope everyone has a great evening. ~Cheri

I'm here, two days in a row! Fasting today and knocking it out of the park. Didn't even have my protein coffee until eleven and have had my appetite go back to normal - that is, it's non-existent! Hooray for my sleeve. It's different for everyone but I swear my biggest hurdles are stress and hormones. With those under control my biggest issue with food is remembering to eat it, and that's something to be thankful for. Anyway, I'm at 200 calories for the day so I've got plenty of room for dinner and maybe even some yogurt with granola later. We shall see. Great job OG! I swear 135 was my low point, too, and not even as low as I wanted. But seeing it for more than a few days in a row took a lot of work, so I'm glad you're working back there. I have no doubt you'll get there again. Thanks for the share, Georgia. I was a type 2 diabetic prior to surgery and it was a very big part of my decision process. I haven't needed medication (outside of the insulin I needed immediately post op) since the day before surgery. Amazing. I was told that I am only in remission - that it doesn't really go away for good - and that I'll likely experience it again once I'm elderly, but I think all of the healthy years in between without wearing out my organs is a great trade off. It's too bad I didn't have surgery BEFORE I developed diabetes, but well, it's too bad I didn't have surgery when I was in my early twenties, period! Hope everyone is well today. I'm off. I grabbed a few minutes to write while Elisheva is very happily preoccupied with some new squishy blocks we bought her yesterday, but I suspect my time minutes is up shortly! ~Cheri

And a special shout out to Laura, just because she's cool. And of course, my buddy coops, who is awesome and looks it in her new pic. Oh yeah, and let us not forget Sheila (M2G) who deserves a special hug for finally finding the method to shed pounds with some small measure of regularity. You've had a struggle! And did I read that FYE is closing in on goal shortly? What?! Amazing work! ~Cheri P.S. Where's Sweetums? And good to see Chimera and sarsar posting a few pages back!

Okay, I had to read more than ten pages to catch up - shame on me for never coming around! From what I remember: Cathy, I hope your husband is doing well. GT, I'm so happy to hear from you because I have thought of you a number of times since the shutdown. Hubs does work with several regions where contractors were actually sent home, so I wondered what was up with you. Sorry about the health things - you know the health care they give us is lacking. I, too, have a laundry list of concerns I have to follow up on at later visits because nobody is ever really interested in delving into the cause of some of my issues. In any case, I hope the Zoloft helps. It does suppress appetite, and yeah, so does the green tea. Congrats to our ladies losing and closing in on goal. I'm happy for you, but yeah, kinda disappointed in myself. Though true adherence to any form of regular diet isn't anything I've done lately. It's been mad around here. CBJ, amazing post about confidence, and also, wishes for a speedy recovery. How exciting! Brown, nice to meet you! Haven't seen you post much, but then, I haven't been around much. So, let's see. We're doing okay. I've been MIA because everyone in the family did the sick rounds over the last ten days. Today is actually the very first day we're all healthy at the same time! I'm officially off my hormonal birth control and we're trying to figure out a new regimen. I had posted briefly about it, but that cycle I was on? I'm STILL on it, and it's been 33 days. Good news, though - as soon as I got off the hormones, my appetite went away and I lost four pounds. I'm back 142 and hoping that with a better feeling of control (I feel absolutely out of control with my food when I'm hormonal, so the last month has been a struggle) I can adhere to 5:2 and get back to losing. I have done 5:2 this week, just rather loosely as far as the fasting hours go. I did do a 500 calorie fast (okay, it was actually 511, sue me) on Monday and plan to fast again Thursday. I have also been feasting, yes, on my other days but I find that now that the hormones are going back to normal I'm able to focus on better choices. So my eating's actually been better since last Friday than it has been in a while. I'm eating regularly, eating pretty good choices most of the time and did one fast so far this week. I feel almost human again! In any case, I have really missed the support I get here but just go entire days when the very first time I'll sit down for the day is to read the twins their bedtime story. I find I have a very limited amount of time, and hate to spend my evenings away from hubs and on the computer, ya know? Hope everyone is well - I am going to commit to coming here at least once a day, if only to check in. Fasting tomorrow, and I already have my day planned. Feasting tonight. Kids and hubs are having pizza but I find I can only eat one slice so it's just not something I really get excited about anymore...I can, however, go after hot wings with gusto, and fully intend to do so. ~Cheri

I had time to catch up, finally. It sounds like everyone has hit hurdles here or there but we're still seeing some good progress for some folks, too. I should stop in each day. It seems like when life gets really pressured the first thing to go is "me time" and that means Facebook and VST! Elisheva really feels she needs to be held 24/7 right now and it's hard to do anything on the web with her like this. Call me a bad mom but I put her in her jumperoo and turned on some toddler tunes. She's bouncing solo right now - hopefully for at least fifteen minutes! I would LOVE to drink my cup of Water without spilling it because she's grabbing for it. Today is my first strict fast day in a very long while. It's not as hard as I thought it would be but it's also not evening yet. I'm having a heck of a time at night. It's just like being on my cycle (which I am...and have been forever) or being pregnant, I swear. Hungry (head hunger) all night long. Sometimes I do great and shut it up with water but other nights it's a lot harder. I very strictly budgeted my calories today so there's no room for a screw up tonight. Here's hoping I make it! I have probably added to the problems with my weight with my sporadic eating. You can't just binge one day and eat 1,500 calories and then starve yourself on 600 calories a day for the next two days and expect your weight to remain consistent. I know that. I just haven't had much time to focus on me or on logging my food before my day starts. I honestly thought I'd have more time once my kids were in school but I do not. I truly believe that I'd have more free time if I had a job outside the home! I hope nobody here is affected by the shutdown. My feelings as a voter are different than my feelings as a military spouse. I'm relieved we're excepted and will be paid...but I'm also angry that we merited an exception. Hubs is doing okay. One thing I'll say is that the active duty guys do get very quick care. He's not able to drive and is currently unable to work out but he'll be fine in a week or two. But you know men...he's good about helping out around the house already and always has been, but he's a bit of a baby when he's not feeling 100% and he kinda milks it for some pampering. Alright ladies. I'm going to try to recommit this week to doing my strict fasts and also to cutting out the late night snacking. Even on carrot sticks! It just makes me feel like I need to eat at night and that's part of my problem. Still ticked that I didn't get a unicorn and a magic wand with my sleeve! This is supposed to be easy, like MAGIC! ~Cheri

Hope everyone is doing okay. It would take me forever to read back since the last time I was here so I'm not going to do it now but I'll catch up shortly. When I have time, which I'm pretty sure I never have anymore. Due to some pretty wacky hormonal issues (on the 16th straight day of my period, how awesome is that?) I find that I fluctuate between not wanting to eat and all and feeling like I might die if I don't eat junk food. And yeah, it's all I want right now. It's been a struggle to stick to a Protein heavy diet but I'm doing okay. I still can't shake those pounds I put on when I started this birth control but I'm bouncing between 141-147 each day...yeah. That's a six pound window. I can eat eggs and turkey sausage all day (with plenty of Water to wash it down) and gain six pounds the next day, so quite frankly, the scale is something I'm not visiting but once a week right now. I settle around 143 most days - right where I went after I started this regimen of failure. The wait to see my doctor was SEVEN weeks, so I still have a while to go before I can get in to find out what's going on. I'm about to just switch my insurance, pay the premium and co-pays and stop using the military treatment facility, because it's ridiculous trying to get appointments. Please, news media, remind me again about how awesomely we're compensated because of our "free" military healthcare. You get what you pay for! In any case, I'm not really sticking to 5:2 right now - I have far too many days where the majority of my calories come from protein coffee and I clock in less than 900 calories. And then that one day a week where the hormones get me and I'm eating half a candy bar at 11 at night throws it all off. I'm thankful for the MFP app because I wouldn't have time to track otherwise. No day has been over 1,600 though, so I'm doing okay. Not losing but I really believe hormones are to blame. Hope everyone is doing okay. I hope my life slows down a bit so I can get back on track. Heck, even back online would be nice! I find it really hard to do fast days if I'm not structured and at home. There are far too many days when I realize it's three pm and I've only had coffee all day. I just feel angry, frustrated and discouraged lately. In positive news, Elisheva is growing fast and is healthy and actually sleeps like a dang champ (knock wood). She's also enormous - wearing nine and twelve month clothing already (she's six months) and is so pretty that we can't get through a single store without her attracting a few admirers. She's a doll. The twins love school and my husband isn't deploying anywhere any time soon. He also probably won't get paid next month, but at least he won't be deployed while that happens! I should update my profile picture. I'll do that this weekend maybe. I still look pretty much the same - I feel like all my excess weight right now is in the bra-line backfat area and my middle, which still hasn't truly recovered from the baby. Grumble grumble. I saw Laura's new picture, looking good, lady! Congrats to all our new lows on the scale (esp. Cathy) and I'm happy for you guys. Best wishes for your dad, FYE. Don't let that stress get your eating habits down. It's hard. Chin up, M2G, I get your frustration completely but hope you won't let it discourage you or let you go off the rails. Later peeps, I need to go get my husband from work. Cause in addition to all my other hats, "Chauffeur" got added to the list when hubs hurt himself the other day. He fell down an entire set of stairs with a heavy vacuum in his hands. He's cool like that. Silly man cracked a rib and is on pain killers so he can't drive. I love him, that I do. If I didn't, I'd make him take the metro and the bus home! ~Cheri

Maybe you're not eating enough! If you're not tracking, resume tracking and see where you're at. You might be eating too little, or consuming more than you realize. In any case, it's HARD to lose weight post baby. Stress, lack of sleep, lack of a regular schedule...I did great shedding the bulk of the weight but those last pesky pounds have been a nightmare. And starting a new birth control regimen did not help! I insta-gained five pounds as soon as I started it! I think there are two schools of women here. Some lose pounds like crazy due to breastfeeding burning an extra 500 calories a day. And some of us just have a relaxed stomach and a ton of hormones floating around that make us feel like we're starving! I didn't feel a real, definite return of restriction until I had completely weaned and the hormones cleared out. The restriction really is still there, I promise. Just track what you eat. And remember that breastfeeding really only means you get one extra calcium/protein rich snack a day - another 200 calories or so! Eat a good balance of foods and try to eat dense Proteins first and see if that helps. I know it's hard. Hormones make me feel like peeling paint off the walls and I can eat, eat, eat if I allow myself to do so. It doesn't matter if I know darn well I'm not really hungry. I feel like I'm starving and that sends me right back to the kitchen. Good luck, ladies! I'm enjoying my almost six month old and it's frustrating at times to feel so tired and also to not fit in my clothes exactly the way I'd like. But I wouldn't trade this little beastie for anything in the world, and if fighting a handful of pounds is the price I have to pay it's worth it! ~Cheri

I, too, have a "happy place" that is higher than I want but I have had to just accept this is the case. Otherwise it's a constant diet/battle to keep those few pounds off. And we're talking two-three pounds! Makes no real difference to anything except my head. But congrats on hitting goal even if you bounced - I told you it was just a check the box thing, anyway. Now you've checked the box and can move on! ~Cheri

And enjoy the visit with family, OD! It's hard to be hostess and watch intake, I know, but it's great to spend time with family you don't see as often. ~Cheri

Happy Anniversary, Cathy! Stay safe, Shelia - we have friends in CO and it's hit them hard, too. Great news, Laura! ~Cheri