Hi Everyone,
I'm new, sorry if this isn't the right place to be posting this! Considering the band was my "gateway thinking" into WLS and I quickly switched to RNY. After some thinking (and a lot of waiting, thanks Kaiser) I'm thinking VSG.
I have been on other boards, but the VSG community is small so I wanted to reach out to all of you to see your stories. I've been working on getting surgery since March 2009 and I've finished my Kaiser classes and find myself wanting to put it off.
Not surgery, I think I need it... but my doctor referred me to someone who is offering free personal training starting in January and lasting until mid-Feb. My Kaiser approval will last this long and I'd like to do a boot camp to get my body in shape.
The mindset that I could potentially get more weight off started me on the VSG path because of malabsorption/rerouting issues with RNY.
Copied from the other forum I frequent:
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I guess my story isn't unlike other people on here and other WLS forums. Looking back it all seems like my entire life has led up to having no other choice than WLS. I just wish I realized/caught it sooner.
I was always a chubby kid - I ran around more and seemed to eat less than my older sister but she was always thin and I was always chunky, rotund, cherubic, whatever you want to call it.
I've never been coordinated so when I stopped running around playing with the neighborhood kids things only got worse. When I was in 6th grade I remember trying to fit into Limited Too, seems almost silly but still heart wrenching to think of me in that dressing room trying to get on those tops so I could wear what other people in my grade were wearing. Now, I had stopped growing (5'2") and was about 125. Not too bad, I was just stocky. I didn't have the experience to step back and see myself back then, just like I don't think I truly see myself now for opposite reasons.
I really don't know what I will look like when I am healthy, even at 125=130 I was a size 10 or 12 at Limited and Express. Yes I had a little bit of a belly, but I think I may be big boned.
I remember weighing myself after 7th grade and I was 156. That seemed huge and I started watching what I was eating, but I wasn't active and soon started gaining 10 pounds a year as i slowly grew out of Contempo Casual, then Express, then Limited an New York and Company. I still had friends and a life, I wasn't abnormally depressed, but the constant struggle made me sad. Endless Weight Watchers kicks and bouts of doing Tae Bo and Sweating with the Oldies were useless to me.
I always thought WLS was not for me. Not because I thought it was the coward's way out, acually quite the opposite - I thought the road was too tough for me and unnecessary. Really, I didn't qualify for surgery until 2004, 2 years after I graduated from high school. Thinking back on it now I wish so much I had done it in college - would I have gotten the job I wanted? Would I be happier today? It's useless looking back, but that's just who I am now.
I always thought I'd find some secret or fall into some miraculous fitness plan and lose all of the weight but I have come to realize that life is not the Biggest Loser. I don't have world class trainers available to me and I am not seconds away from an amazing fitness facility and I do have to worry about my real life and can't buy all organic.
I used to write myself letters to read in the future - sort of like journal entries - so I could see how far I've come. Well, whenever I find those tucked away in files or notebooks there has been no real change. I wrote myself a letter at the beginning of the year about how I was going to overcome. Looking back at it now I was so right but little did I know that WLS was going to empower me to finally make good on my dreams.
Overall I feel I am confident - but I'd be lying if I said I felt completely comfortable with who I am in every situation. I am outgoing and self efficient in every way except when it comes to my weight. I understand that WLS will be easy or automatically guarantee me happiness. This is just a tool and I am in charge of how much it gives me. I can't wait to show everyone how I've always envisioned myself!
I've always been in denial of how I look to others, if I do my hair and makeup I think it takes off 30 pounds for some reason! Very strange. I also thought I also knew comorbidities were around the corner - no denying that, but I didn't realize how close. I've recently been diagnosed with fatty liver, PCOS, and insulin resistance! Had no clue until I started the WLS process...
