Norma

Ditto Tiffy's response for me. I did not want a host of new issues to get used to (dumping, inability to eat what I chose to eat, having to take mulitiple doses of expensive biaractric vitamins and suppliments every day for life due to malabsoprtion issues of RNY). The sleeve was my only choice after I had done my research. I am able to eat like a "normal" person for the first time in my life.

I had sleeve surgery Oct 30 with Dr Alberto Aceves in Mexicala, Mexico for $9,000 which included all pre-tests, consult, 3 days in hospital, all surgeons fees (including anesthesialogist, internist, primary surgeon and secondary surgeon) all hospital costs (OR, recovery room, medications, food, IV meds, take home meds), transportation from San Diego airport to Mexicali and back, 1 night in hotel, 3 leak tests after surgery) 4 visits in hospital per day with surgeons, pre surgery consult and review of my medical history, all letters needed for Flex spend reinbursement and letter of medical necessity from Dr Aceves. The only expense not covered was the roundtrip airline tickets to get me to San Diego. I would suggest you tell your surgeon to meet that price and that level of service if he wants your business. I would go back to Dr Aceves for surgery in a heartbeat. His service and that of the hospital was the best care I have received in my 50 years and 17 surgeries. I did not have to have a psych consult or jump through any hoops either. It is really a no brainer that Dr Aceves is the best.

Joon, You are not the only one awake at this time of night. My pain medication for my knee wore off at about 15 minutes ago and my pain woke me up. My cat is annoyed with me for waking her up to move her out of my way so that I could get out of bed. You will be doing so well in a few days that all the stress about the surgery and getting the time off work will seem like unnecessary overkill anxiety. I am 21 days out and have had no pain, no problems with adjusting to the sipping and continuous drinking of water. I have had no hunger and feel great. My blood sugars have been easy to control. Life is great. Enjoy your time off.

Thinoneday, I am not offended by what you said. I would hope that many people could say the same things--that they like themselves, that they rise above the difficulties of insults and criticism about being obese, that despite their weight they have a well balance life with relationships, dating, intimacy, independent thinking and live life to the fullest. However, my experience as a therapist is that you and your daughter are not the norm and that many people are truly bothered by the taunts, the discrimination, the feelings that they "should be able to control their eating and weight and that there is something wrong with them because they are fat". My postings are only to give people who want it an idea of what type of therapist might be able to help them with these issues. If it doesn't apply to you, don't pay it any attention.

Good Luck. I know you are excited. Post when you can.

Sorry that you had such a bad experience. (((((Hugs))))) I will keep you in my thoughts and send healing energy your way. Glad that you are with your kids and starting to feel more like yourself.

Hang in there, Daisey. I know all about trying to hold off surgery for the new year. Hope you feel better soon.

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a psychotherapy treatment that was originally designed to alleviate the distress associated with traumatic memories. Basically, it was used with war veterans and rape victims to process the traumatic events and the emotional responses of the events to separate the emotional overlay the memory of the event caused in the client. During a trauma, what we think, hear, see, experience gets connected in the brain and then anytime we experience something similar, we tend to share that original emotion with the new event. For example, in junior high home economics class, we made a peasant blouse and skirt. Mine was a bright yellow solid blouse with a black and yellow striped skirt. On the first day I wore it, while I was enjoying an ice cream sandwich in the cafeteria and at the exact moment that ice cream fell on my breast, some teenage boys laughed at me and called me a "fat bumblebee". I was humiliated and connected the color yellow with being unattractive and ashamed. For years, I unconsciously avoided the color yellow in clothing and hated sewing and wearing skirts/blouses and did not want people to see me eat. This is a very minor example but, I hope that you can see how isolated incidents can be imprinted with emotions and affect how we live. I feel that the highly charged emotions of shame and guilt relate to a lot of food issues and the importance that we have placed on food. EMDR is a method of separating out the emotions from the events.

I will break down the two types of therapy. Hope this is not too technical. Will do EMDR in a separate post. DBT stands for Dialectical Behavior Therapy--this technique was developed by Marsha Lineham to work with people with Borderline Personality Disorder. (I am NOT saying that obese people have this disorder, but many obese people CAN benefit from this type of therapy). It is based on the following ideas: Mindfulness is the capacity to pay attention, nonjudgmentally, to the present moment. Mindfulness is all about living in the moment, experiencing one's emotions and senses fully, yet with perspective. It is considered a foundation for the other skills taught in DBT, because it helps individuals accept and tolerate the powerful emotions they may feel when challenging their habits or exposing themselves to upsetting situations. The concept of mindfulness and the meditative exercises used to teach it are derived from traditional Buddhist practice, though the version taught in DBT does not involve any religious or metaphysical concepts. Interpersonal response patterns taught in DBT skills training are very similar to those taught in many assertiveness and interpersonal problem-solving classes. They include effective strategies for asking for what one needs, saying no, and coping with interpersonal conflict. Individuals frequently possess good interpersonal skills in a general sense. The problems arise in the application of these skills to specific situations. An individual may be able to describe effective behavioral sequences when discussing another person encountering a problematic situation, but may be completely incapable of generating or carrying out a similar behavioral sequence when analyzing his or her own situation. The interpersonal effectiveness module focuses on situations where the objective is to change something (e.g., requesting that someone do something) or to resist changes someone else is trying to make (e.g., saying no). The skills taught are intended to maximize the chances that a person?s goals in a specific situation will be met, while at the same time not damaging either the relationship or the person?s self-respect. Emotion regulation: Identifying and labeling emotions Identifying obstacles to changing emotions Reducing vulnerability to emotion mind Increasing positive emotional events Increasing mindfulness to current emotions Taking opposite action Applying distress tolerance techniques Distress tolerance Many current approaches to mental health treatment focus on changing distressing events and circumstances. They have paid little attention to accepting, finding meaning for, and tolerating distress. This task has generally been tackled by psychodynamic, psychoanalytic, gestalt, or narrative therapies, along with religious and spiritual communities and leaders. Dialectical behavior therapy emphasizes learning to bear pain skillfully. Distress tolerance skills constitute a natural development from mindfulness skills. They have to do with the ability to accept, in a non-evaluative and nonjudgmental fashion, both oneself and the current situation. Although this is a nonjudgmental stance, this does not mean that it is one of approval or resignation. The goal is to become capable of calmly recognizing negative situations and their impact, rather than becoming overwhelmed or hiding from them. This allows individuals to make wise decisions about whether and how to take action, rather than falling into the intense, desperate, and often destructive emotional reactions that are part of borderline personality disorder. Skills for acceptance include radical acceptance, turning the mind toward acceptance, and distinguishing between "willingness" (acting skillfully, from a realistic understanding of the present situation) and "willfulness" (trying to impose one's will regardless of reality). Participants also learn four crisis survival skills, to help deal with immediate emotional responses that may seem overwhelming: distracting oneself, self-soothing, improving the moment, and thinking of pros and cons.

I would tell her what you told us. You want to be in charge of your daily meals and are looking for guidelines not a script. She should be able to accommodate that and if she is not--find yourself someone who will listen. My doctor gives us permission to eat solid foods (as tolerated) anytime after 31 days. Let her know that she is being too restrictive and too prescriptive for your needs.

I told everyone (facebook, friends, employer and co-workers, extended family) and knew that most of family would not be supportive. That worked well for me but I am headstrong and independent anyway. Any resistance that I got just made my resolve stronger. But, then, I have been on my own since age 15 and limit my involment with toxic people (i.e., some extended family or co-workers). I knew that having the sleeve was the only thing that I could do to save my life and turn around my health issues. I told the nay sayers that they could shut up unless they were willing to pay for my surgery and for all my medical costs for life. Alas, I had to self pay everything, but I had no problems with people trying to talk me out of it. Some worried about the Mexico thing, but I had checked out Dr Aceves and Almater and had not concerns myself. I fowarded some posts by recent surgery patients to ease my friends and family members fears. If you have any concerns or if you want any help finding a therapist in your area for the head hunger and emotional issues that weight loss will stir up, PM me and I will help you with that. I am a therapist with 35+ years of experience. You will have all the support you want here on this site.:thumbup1:

I took a small sports bottle (wide mouthed) with me on the plane and got ice from flight attendant and mixed biggest loser protein to go or Kellogg protein powder with water. I had a 3 hour lay over in Houston and a 2 hour one in San Deigo before boarding--at San Diego, I went to a juice bar and had them make me a slushy with watermelon juice and ice. I should have just bought the small one, but my eyes were bigger than my stomach. You will do fine. You have been getting your fluids by IVs and will be tired from lack of exercise but not woosy from lack of food/nutrients on the day you fly back.

It is the day after your surgery.

The stressing out part is the exact reason that I choose not to have a scale at home and not to weigh except at my doctor's appointments or once a month at the gym. I am all for losing weight and sticking to the eating plan recommended by my doctor, but I know that I can so easily become obsessed with the scale numbers and allow them to dictate how I feel about myself on any given day.

I haven't been able to get into chat for last two days--anyone else having trouble?

Burping could be a sign of nausea. Are you taking an anti acid medication like Nexium or Rantidine or something? Jello is considered a clear liquid by my doctor as are sugar free popsicles and crystal light and broth. I would suggest that you contact your doctor about what you are eating and how you are feeling. I can start regular food (in small amounts) 31 days after surgery depending on how my stomach is tolerating it. Increase burping would be a sign that my stomach is not ready for that food yet or that I am eating too fast and taking too big of bites.

The emotional rollecoaster prior to surgery is not uncommon. :thumbup1: Why we continued to persecute ourselves for our "lack of will power" is kind of nuts--because obese people tend to overmanufacture Gherlin, the hunger hormone, we are hungry all the time. Trying to fight that without surgery is a never ending battle. We would have to literally starve ourselves indefinitely to be successful. It is our will power and determination that allows us to be successful in the short term with weight loss. Many of us have lost 50 to 100 lbs multiple times in our lives on "diets and exercise plans". However, we "fail and regain" what we have lost as soon as we allow ourselves to eat again--our metabolism works against us and our body prefers to store food as fat rather than use it. Those are the reasons that sleeve surgery is such a great tool for us--without the gherlin, we don't feel hungry all the time. That allows us to change our relationship with food and actually eat to live rather than live to eat. Keep posting and finding support on VST. You will be understood and supported here.

I did not have to do a bowel prep at all. I have no idea why anyone would need to for a sleeve.

Congrats to both of you. Even if you don't meet anyone before your surgery, the wing you will be in is all Dr Aceves patients and so you will be able to get to know each other there. I did not know that Barb and Ursula and Maria were going to be there but we found each other and are continuing to contact each other. You will have a excellent trip/experience. If you are going alone and have questions, pm me and i will give you my email /cell and feel free to text me at any time.

Unless you are getting whole foods and not eating the processed to death stuff that most of us get, I don't know that we can rely totally on getting all our vitamins from the small portions of foods we eat. I would recommend that you ask your doctor that. I know that lots of obese people are lacking enough Vitamin d. One of the purposes of the 3 month followup is to get chem profile.

Congrats, Jenn. I have noticed that the gas is gone at about 2 weeks. I used Gas-X morning and night and used a heating pad for about the first 9 days. Good luck. I agree that Aceves and Campos and the Almater hospital team are the best!

I was one of the rare ones who did not have any second thoughts or fears about having sleeve surgery. I guess it is because I researched it so thoroughly and, as a therapist, have a pretty good understanding of head hunger and the emotional aspects of weight loss for me. I was so tired of the sense of failure in regard to food in my life that I welcomed with excitement the changes that the tool of the sleeve offers. I had a list of questions that I sent my surgeon and asked a lot of questions on this site. Knowledge was the key for me.

I weighed 377 at one time. Through diet and my gym addiction, I lost 135 lbs but could not keep it off. I regained to 312lbs before having sleeve surgery.

Vitamins-for the sleeve all you need is a regular multiviamin. As there is no malabsorption issue with the sleeve, you will not need the bariatric supplemental vitamins that are recommended for gastric bypass patients.

Aimee, I am only a few weeks ahead of you but will be happy to answer any questions you have and buddy with you. I am happy to give you my email and phone as well. I will send you a Private message.