Lisanne

I'm Lisa and I'm currently 45 yrs old and a single mom to two kids (one is married and over 800 miles away, the other is a teen and lives with me). In my former (healthier) life, I was an RN. My health declined and as of 2002, I became disabled. My goal, at that time, was to pursue weight loss surgery, lose the weight, regain a healthier Me and go back to work. The plan didn't work too well. Over the years, I researched weight loss surgery. With my insurance (medicare), it took awhile to find a provider that would accept the insurance, not to mention, medicare is very picky. After alot of ups and downs, I went to Mexico in 2008 and got my Sleeve. There were some complications, but it wasn't too bad. I left the hospital on time and had no problems afterward. My start weight was 396. I was miserable. My diabetes was out of control. I had hypertension. I was also confined to a power chair. Within a year, I had dropped 100 lbs and was below 300 lbs. I was ecstatic. I hadn't been that "skinny" in years. Then the weight loss slowed, then stopped. It was becoming harder and harder to remain on my "diet". From the beginning, I could always eat more than other post op Sleevers. I also never lost my appetite like many others do. I began having other health issues, then personal issues. In 2010, my husband of 23 yrs left me for someone else. My life spiraled downward after that. At first, I avoided food. I stopped eating altogether. I lost about 30 lbs. Once I began eating again, I didn't care what I ate. The depression that I had battled my entire life raised its ugly head and got very comfortable in my life. I turned to all of the wrong things. Now, 2013, my weight has crept up over 300 again. This is devastating to me. Obviously, I am not a success story. I think in the beginning of my journey, I was a bit naive, perhaps I wore the rose-colored glasses at times. I understood that this surgery was merely a tool and that I still had to do the work. I was willing to do the work. I just needed the help that the surgery gave me. I am determined to at least get below the 300 lb mark again. I am back with the Protein shakes, low carbs, drinking tons of Water. With my physical limitations, I haven't managed to make myself exercise yet. I know it's going to be very painful but I realize that it's necessary. So, that is my story....or at least a few of the highlights. I'm an open book and will answer any question posed to me.....AND I'm willing to listen to any and all advice. I can use all of the help and support that I can get. Lisa

Thank you all. I really appreciate it.

I cant stress the importance of this preop diet. Please follow it to the letter. Unfortunately, I didnt do this and suffered from it. The preop diet is giving for very important reasons.... shrinking the liver, to allow the surgeon to move it easily to get to the stomach. also to get you used to the diet itself.. Since I didnt follow mine, my liver was really enlarged. Thankfully, Dr. Joya was skilled enough to continue with my Sleeve...however, in the process of trying to move it, my liver was lacerated...he repaired it with easy, thankfully and continued on with my Sleeve. As a result, I lost alot of blood and needed transfusions and he had to make a few more incisions. In the end, I had 8 incisions and 20 stitches. It didnt result in any more hospital stay, but I was in a bit more pain than usual. Plus, the cost was more too. I really wish I had known all of this...I guess I did, but I ignored it, thinking I would be fine.....well, I was wrong. So now, I really stress the importance of this diet. All surgeons preops are different and some dont require one...alot of that depends on the surgeon as well as you overall health and BMI at the time. My BMI was 73 at the time of surgery, so I really needed to do well on my preop, but I didnt.

My diet has been off track for many months now and my weight loss (or lack thereof) really reflects that. In my head, I know what I need to do in order to lose the weight...but I cant get my body to do what I want. I still am able to eat too much, not nearly what I ate pre-surgery, of course....but still alot, nonetheless. Its really depressing. Ive been thinking about asking my doctor for an appetite suppressant, except that they have never worked before. I crave food and get so hungry sometimes. I get full pretty fast, but Im taking in too many carbs and calories. My food addiction has never been lessened by WLS. I always thought this was the "miracle cure". Wow, was I wrong about that. That shows how naive I was, but I was just so convinced and so hopeful...not to mention it was my last chance at living. Now, Im struggling and its my own fault, but still cant seem to work it out. I feel so guilty and ashamed over my inability to curb my appetite and effect change over my body. Theres been many times over the course of this journey that I have felt that I have wasted my chance and ruined my Sleeve.....I know thats not really the case. My Sleeve is functioning fine and still limits my intake by alot....but theres still the appetite and cravings for "bad foods". I guess thats my vent for the day.. Any suggestions that I can actually follow? lol

Hey everyone. Im Lisa. Im 41yrs old. Im married with 2 kids. I got my Sleeve March 17, 2008....so Im almost 15 months postop. I have lost a total of 109 lbs so far. I still have a longggg way to go. Im not even half way to my goal. I started with a BMI of 73, weight of 396. It was a long, hard road for me....getting the Sleeve. I couldnt find anyone near me that either would take my insurance or that would even do my surgery with my high BMI (without first losing alot of weight, which I couldnt do without the surgery). So, I traveled to Mexico with my husband and had it done there. Never in my wildest dreams would I have ever thought I would go to another country to get surgery. Being a nurse, I was quite skeptical. However, I had a pretty good experience. I had a minor complication, but it turned out fine and it didnt require any extra hospital time. I remember having a ton of pain though - gas pain mostly. I was miserable for about 2 wks. After I removed my stitches, I had some incision difficulties - but I tend to have those every time Ive ever had surgery, so I wasnt surprised. At this point in time, I feel like a new person. I can do so many things that I couldnt before surgery. I was confined to a power chair for the most part - I couldnt go to a store that didnt offer the scooters. I took my power chair to the mall or any other place that I needed to walk. I have been disabled from working since 2002. I am hoping to be able to go back at some point. Before surgery, my Diabetes was totally uncontrolled. I was on Insulin and pills.. now, Im only on pills and Ive even cut that down to half of what I was taking. I had been on 2 blood pressure pills, now I only take one and Im thinking pretty soon I might not need that one either, or at least a much lower dose. I also have sleep Apnea and Ive been able to lower my pressure by several points and will be lowering it again soon I imagine. So basically, I am a new person compared to what I was a year ago. I might have a long way to go, but this journey has been so worth it! Thanks for the invite to this forum. I look forward to getting to know everyone. hugs 'n love, Lisa

Before my surgery, I always wondered what if would feel like to lose 100 lbs or more. It was such a surreal thought, one I couldnt fathom even in my wildest dreams. It seemed like a dream that would just stay that way - a dream - my very own fantasy. I struggled to get to my 100 lb loss. My weight loss was going great when I reached my 75 lbs mark, then it all went backward. This was my 5 months post surgery. This is when my appetite really kicked back in and I always knew I could eat more than your average Sleevester. I had a goal to reach 100 lbs by Thanksgiving - well that didnt work, even tho I had plenty of time to do it in...so then I moved the goal to Christmas...still didnt make it. I think I finally reached it in Jan of 2009. So, now its been 13 months since my surgery and Ive lost 111 lbs....in one way, Im totally thrilled with that, but on the other hand, Im really angry that I havent lost more...why am I angry, bc Ive done it to myself by continuing to eat the wrong things which has made me go up and down in weight.. One good thing Ive realized is that I do know how to maintain...which is not what I want to yet...but at least I know how to do it.. For the past few weeks, Ive steadily lost about a lb a week, sometimes more, sometimes less...but on average, about a lb/week. Im not giving up. Im not even halfway to my goal. As my ticker indicates, I have 137 lbs to go to reach my goal of 150 lbs. Even at that, I wont be "skinny" but I will feel like a million bux!

You are very welcome. Good luck with ur journey!

Beleive me, I get grouchy with diets too....which is why I didnt stick to mine like I should. I managed to lose 11 lbs on it, but starting at 396, that wasnt even a drop in the bucket, ya know? I kept telling myself it was only 2 wks and I could do it.....and I could have, I think, esp if I had known the consequences of my actions...or lack of actions. So, even if the doctor doesnt say u need a pre-op, it certainly wont hurt anything to do it.....and if they recommend or require it...by all means, do it and follow it closely. When I awoke and my husband told me what happened, my first thot was, OMG, did they give me my VSG or what? I was so scared when I finally talked to my doctor and he told me that he was able to perform the surgery. I was so relieved that I cried.. Good luck

Thankyou so much. I really appreciate it alot. I sure hope I can help someone avoid my mishap.. hugs.. Lisa

That is how it is going for me lately. I guess Im feeling a bit sorry for myself, its so hard to pick myself back up. I just cant find the motivation anymore. I had a really good food day yesterday, but today started out awful. For breakfast, hubby brought home Mcdonalds. UGH! The only consolation is that it will be breakfast and lunch for me. If I could eat a really small/light dinner tonite, I would be ok.... hopefully I will have the willpower for that. I really dont know what to do anymore. My appetite and cravings are really high. I get hungry, I can eat alot.....*sigh*.....it has been this way since I had surgery, but has gotten worse over the last 8 months or so. I know I eat the wrong foods alot lately. My overall health has really improved since I lost the 100+ lbs, but recently I have been feeling really bad again. I have an almost constant headache and the doctors cant find anything that is wrong. I figure most of it is stress and worry, mixed with some depression. I even hate getting online anymore. I used to find such solace in the WLS groups im in, but now, I just find it super depressing seeing all the ones having success....altho Im really happy for all of them, it still hurts that Im not one of them at the moment. Im truly not giving up...I just dont know what to do anymore. It seems Ive tried everything. I even tried going back to basics with the Protein drinks. I lasted one day and was just physically sick with just the thought of drinking my meals. When I cut my carbs and calories, I do lose weight, but I cant keep at it b4 Im caving in for something off the diet. I know I need to get these carbs out of my system - at least the bad carbs. But thats my major craving of course. Maybe I should lock myself in a padded room for a few weeks... lol. I couldnt harm myself or anyone else with my crankiness. My husband can barely stand to be around me, my marriage really sux. :sad0: and thats just one of my stressors. Ok, Ive vented for the day. I dont think I accomplished anything, except getting it off my chest for a bit.. thanks for listening..

I agree with the others too. Trust your doctor. You have a much lower BMI than I did. Mine was 73 when I began my journey. I wasnt required to lose a certain amount of weight, which is why I chose my doctor. However, I was supposed to do the pre-op diet and I had guidelines...which I didnt follow. So, go with what your doctor says. Good luck.

Im glad that I could help. Good luck with your pre-op and surgery. :thumbup: Lisa

No, i dont have mobility issues, altho running isnt an option. I can walk just fine, esp after my 100 + lbs loss....My Gym has a track and a pool, plus the equipment. So, my problem is getting off my rear and going. I know I can. I have to get that motivation.

I dont think Ive ever heard it all put like that, but i think that is the right thing to do. I do hate exercising, but i hate being obese alot worse. I have Gym membership that Im just wasting. Ive been telling myself I have to get back to it, but have just not done it. Maybe its time to light that fire under me and get out there and do it. Thanks!

Thanks. I will look for it =)

Someone told me about TOPS, but when I checked into it, we dont have any groups here..the nearest is like 3 hrs away. We dont have OA either, altho I tried that many yrs ago and got nothing out of it. I was the largest one there and they treated me like a leper...sad

Drug addicts do have it easier, in my opinion...not saying its easier..but we do have to eat to live, they dont require drugs to keep breathing, ya know.. Counselling isnt a financial option right now. The only ones that except my insurance, have no idea about eating disorders....I tried it and it was a waste of my time and money. The only good that came from it was that I got to talk about my feelings......well, I can do that here, for free...lol

Those are my feelings as well. I think he did the best he could with what he was working with inside me....and truly, it was a good job. I didnt have any post op complications, etc.......except being able to eat more and still having my appetite. Getting the 2nd part of the DS isnt an option. I tried for that, thinking it was the solution. So, I have to deal with what I have.

I think I actually did contact my surgeons office at one point regarding the size of my new stomach. But by then it was too late and there wasnt anything that could be done about it. I couldnt afford to go back to him and have him try to make it smaller, not sure that he would have done that anyway. I had thot that since I had some complications during surgery, that he just wasnt able to get it small enough.....but since then, Ive heard of some of his patients having larger stomachs afterward too. In some ways that has been better one me, I didnt have some of the post op complications that others have with smaller ones.... however, the eating larger amounts certainly is a disadvantage.