HaveHope

I'm just getting started with the process, going to the free seminar Tuesday (it's required before starting) and I'm already finding myself worrying if I'm giving the "right" answers. While I know that being truthful is uber important... I want this so bad and I'm afraid they'll deny me for some reason... and I swear I'm not a crazy person! I lost over 150 pounds in 2007/2008 and kept it off for several years but have gained 100 pounds back in the last 2 years. I'm worried if they see that I did lose that much on my own that I won't need the band? I'm worried that if they know I have high BP (totally weight related) or GERD, that they won't let me? I'm worried that my PCP (who I rarely see and I am bad for doctor hopping, depending on what's wrong with me) won't think it's a good idea... will that matter? I want this done yesterday... so bad. I'm not a fat person, I'm a skinny person stuck inside all this blubber.... I need help finding myself again!! Did/does anyone else have all these crazy worries running around in your head?

I guess that sounds bad, doctor hopping. It's really not like that, I live in a tiny town in the middle of nowhere, the doctor turn over rate is astonishing... we're a low income rural area so doctors move here for 2 years to get money off their student loans, and then move the heck away from here ( I can't blame them, haha... if my family wasn't here I'd be gone too). You are never really able to "bond" with any doctor because they're gone before you know it. I very rarely go to the doctor, I'll hear about "a good one" at a different office, then before you know it they're gone so I'll go back to the old office etc. But honestly I go to the doctor about 1x per year... I just didn't want it to sound like I was "pill shopping" or anything. ) Thanks for everyone's replies. I need to calm down. I have to remind myself that I didn't get this big overnight and I won't get skinny overnight either.

Hey everyone! I'm Kelly and I'm SO excited to be here! I'll share my backstory: I have been heavy set most of my life. Back in 2000 I lost 80 pounds by starving myself... needless to say that didn't last long, I gained all that weight back plus some. I got to my top weight in December 2006 of 310 and started Weight Watchers, got to my goal of 155 in May 2008... life had never been better. I enjoyed being at my goal weight SO much, honestly the feeling of being there is just so amazing that it's not describable. I kept the weight off (except 20 that I played back and forth with) until the spring of 2011. I'd been dealing with IF for a couple years and we had the chance to adopt a newborn, an adoption that came out of the blue. The next 50 days were the most anxiety filled I'd ever experienced... and I dealt with that by eating. A lot. My amazing little girl was born in July and I was able to stop working to stay home with her... and I was just so darn happy! So I ate. A lot. Life with her is so amazing, but... now that I'm home all day, I can't keep my eating under control. I have managed to gain back 100 pounds in the last 2 years.... so sad. I always knew that if my insurance would pay for the surgery, that I would have it in a heartbeat, as a tool to help me get to & maintain my goal weight. The other day I just got to thinking about it, looked up my policy online and I'll be doggoned it wasn't one of the exclusions on my plan!! I called and she said that most likely I'd qualify, so I'm waiting on my packet to come in the mail to fill out and get started!! In case the pictures work: The one of me in the jeans and blue shirt was the picture that led me to join WW in 2006 The second picture was me at my goal weight The third was at a farm recently