lisacaron

@RJ'S/beginning I empathize with you. I have to be honest I went into the surgery with no expectations. It was a hope to feel better and an attempt to get healthy. I had so many digestive issues prior to the surgery that I have to say having surgery has helped with tremendously. There are other things it did not help with, and the journey continues for me. I have not lost all my weight I am not at goal, I am just working through it all. I have a had a few complications along the way and still hoping to keep my band after dilation last month. I am just rolling with the punches as usual. Taking life one moment at a time and cherishing the good times and trying to find the silver linings in the not so good times. That's really all I can do. I learned at a very young age that life is short and precious and even if it's not all we think it should be it is all as it should be. There are reasons we go through what we do, though in the moment I am hard pressed to find them myself. In hind sight I am able to see where the low times brought me to a new levels of confidence, or strength and knowledge that I did not have before. Sure I would rather just add Water and have it all in an instant but I have also learned through my years that the things you truly cherish and admire are not easily won. Just like most foods, the ones that are prepared with love and cooked the longest are often the most savory and delicious things. The ones you just add water to, are most often full of artifice that either doesn't' last or is just plain no good for us. You have been through the mill, and perhaps your feeling more then a bit beat up but just like the pulp that turns into fine wine or delicious apple cider...your on your way to that next smooth phase of awesome!! Sending you some {{{hugs}}} and extra bravado for being such an inspiration! Your allowed to feel blue, cry, scream throw things (always a favorite of mine!) just don't forget to paint yourself rainbow in there somewhere because you will make it beautiful!!

@ 100% right on the money! Got to get in there to get those labs done. Most of us wait until we see or feel like something is not right and that's not the time to run to the Dr. by then it's often already too late. Keeping in regular check ups with your PCP and bariatric group is the way to go. I had an appointment a few months ago and went to see the endocrinologist and they found that the B Vitamins in my system were too high they came back as flag on my blood work. Not at toxic levels but i was taking Biotin every day in high milligram doses on top of my daily multi Vitamin believing that B vitamins and B12 specifically was not stored in your body and that this was "healthy" for me. I was already getting enough of those vitamins from the foods and other fortified foods I was eating. We have become so complacent with our food choices even though we know we should look at the labels we are looking at the calorie fat sugar contents and we are not checking those extra vitamins and minerals they add in and they can sneak past you! I didn't have any adverse affect or toxicity thank goodness, they saw the flag on the blood test and I stopped taking the extra vitamins and today all is well.

@@SashaWLS I would ask yourself this question, why are these things calling your name? What about eating these foods makes you feel satisfied? Is it the taste? The texture? The comfort of eating them? I think to really change our habits we have to understand why we have them and what it is that's in our lives that has us gravitating towards certain things and not others especially the things that are not healthy for us. For me I know that my nemesis is chocolate anything and salt. I enjoy the taste, and texture of salted caramel or a smooth piece of sugary chocolate. It comforts me and makes me feel like everything is OK. I realized that when my life is upside down or I am in a frenzy. What I need is comfort and relaxation and release of tension and for me a Magnum ice cream bar is like a big comfy hug or a snuggle, and I realized that is what I need in those moments not the extra sugar and calories. I hope my understanding helps you in some way....

Getting up and walking is the key as Bandista said above. Depending on if you are staying the night or going home the same day. If you can stay the night I recommend taking advantage of it and getting your rest and having the assistance in getting up and moving around. The sooner you do that the faster the gas and anesthesia will move out of your body. Tea was a great soother for me in the early days, and sipping it from a spoon or small medicine cup is the way to go in the first few days. Ice pops any flavor sugar free if possible are also a big help in the early days and help to sooth the insides. Gas-ex is a friend, ice packs for port site and incision site pain help tremendously as well as a heating pad for your back and/or shoulder if you have gas pain that lingers. If your on a liquid diet for a couple of weeks stock up on your Protein shakes and liquids now. My favorite substitute for Water is Mio's Sweet Tea but there are so many different things out there. Soups and such are great, when I was able to eat mushy foods I found that Wendy's chilli mixed up in the blender hit the spot. When we were feeling better we made our own pot of turkey chilli and it's still a favorite today.

OK keep it going ya'll I got that spreadsheet going so we can find that central location for a meet up

Hi Liz I'm game!!! I'll even help pull things together with everyone!!! So as we approach 2015....lets make plans! Everyone post where your from in the world...and then we can find a place that is central and enjoyable to visit and people would like to plan a nice vacation to. We can then post some options, for dates and travel and places to stay and get together etc. So as you probably all know I am on Long Island NY. Lizzy gal is in NYC.... So Bander Buddies....where are you from??? Name: Lisa Caron Town: Long Island State: NY Country: USA or :

Oh my friend I totally hear you and I applaud you for knowing you were hungry and eating without over doing it! You are doing so amazing!!! Being a single parent is not an easy thing to do at all!! I hope that your husband is doing his part in helping with the tuition and taking care of the girls! That is still his responsibility as much as it is yours and the girls as well. I'm sure your girls are very proud of their Mom for being so strong and working on herself while still taking care of the family and keeping a sense of structure to everyone's family life. We are here for you! I have days where I wish I would show some better judgement and not fall into my old bad habits. Having the Fluid taken out of my band over this past month has really presented a huge challenge for me!! I have gotten back that irrational hunger feelings..but it seems to only be triggered by those frustrating and tumultuous emotions. I actually lost a bunch of weight when the fluid first came out...and then I started eating and eating things that before I would only nibble at full bore. I am close to that Onederland also..and it's dam frustrating!!! I put back those few pounds and now I am determined to get them GONE. Could just be Water weight since I am super bloated for some odd reason...but still I want to back in that sweet spot again!!

Oh my goodness...do I know about long thick heavy hair!! When my Mom was young she had the long long hair..and when I was young...ME TOO!!! I hated it!! I was never allowed to wear it down and long to school. It was always up and in a braid she was afraid of the lice as if that was going to stop it. My hair was so long and thick I would get headaches from having it piled on top of my head! My eyes have an almond shape to them already but when she would do my hair she would pull it up so tight that it made them even more almond shaped. Today I'd want to do that to pull the wrinkles out I know it's not yet Throw Back Thursday but here is one photo of me and my brother one day I was allowed to wear my hair long. I begged my Dad to take me for a hair cut as I reached Jr. high and he took me to the barber and cut about 3 feet off my hair, I thought he and my mother were going to get a divorce over that one!! I was too happy to care though

@@SteinLaFemme I have been to the support groups there before. They usually have a few people there. I know the office is undergoing an entire reorganization right now, and I'm not sure what the status of their groups are at this point. I would give the office a call and ask them when the next group is and to confirm that it is still on. I have not attended a group there for a few months now since they started doing this re-org and doing construction at the hospital. We have a NYC-Long Island Bariatric Support group as well if you feel up to a trip into NYC our next group is scheduled for Oct. 25th. I'm working on securing a space in Nassau County and Suffolk County to expand our group to those area's as well. Here are the details for the next meeting and a link to the NYC-LI BP support group thread http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/304888-ny-nyclong-island/page-11 The next meeting of the NYC/Long Island Bariatric Pal Support Group will be held on October 25th from 2PM till 4 PM at The Atrium at 805 Third Avenue. The building is on Third Ave between 49th and 50th Streets. The Atrium is at the back of the space on the lower level. We are looking forward to seeing many of our forum friends there. If any Jersey friends want to attend, please feel free to cross the Hudson and join us!!! Westchester, Rockland and any other upstate folks are welcome to come spend the afternoon in NYC as well! We are still working on our Long Island Venue's so stay tuned! For those folks in the outer boroughs if you are interested in putting a meeting together in your area, visit your local library and see if it might be possible to book one of their meeting spaces for an afternoon. You generally have to live in the area to do this, so if you'd like to see a meeting in your area, give us a hand to secure the space and we'd be happy to come to your area and host a meeting with you!! Hope to see you all on October 25th in NYC!!! Come back in a few days for some more "details" and the inside scoop for the upcoming meeting.....

You know when I went to the salon that day my stylist and I were joking with the shampoo girl that this time I was just going to shave my head. Every time I go to see my stylist she knows me well I never have the same hair cut or color and I love to always try something new. To me that's the beauty of hair it will grow out if you don't like it and you can always be changing it to suit your style. I have some trouble with the Pixi cut because I have a long hair line in the back and often looks like a mullet on me in about a week! I love the cut though!! So simple to take care of, wash and wear!

@@dylanmiles23 you know I was taking the biotin when I was first banded b/c I was losing so much hair and it was so much more noticeable I thought when my hair was longer which prompted the first cut. When I saw the endocrinologist though she told me that my B12 was too high! If you can believe that, and told me to stop taking the biotin. So I haven't done so in a while but i have noticed a change since stopping, and I have been wondering about the blood work since as I understand it Vitamin B12 does not stay in your system for long.....might be time to check that again thanks for that reminder!!

And she is a power house let me tell ya! I wish I had her control!!

and a boy who envisioned....

and a boy who envisioned....

@@gowalking you truly are an inspiration and your right there are really no words to describe the feelings you must have!!! Way to go girl!!!

Love it!!!! I chopped my hair shorter too...wasn't sure how hubs would react b/c he likes the long hair..but you know it's MY head and my time so clip clip. Now we need to all go out and PARTY!!! OK well at least we can dance at Zumba and pretend we are all together at a party!

I feel you with the arthritis stuff. I am thinking that I may need to see a rheumatologist. My PCP keeps telling me to do that...but you know...I just don't wanna know! Sometimes I think that if I'm going to "live" every diagnosis watching out for this and that and the other things...where and when do you actually "live"? Yeah my foot hurts and my neck is stiff too and my back is tight and I'm sure it's from all that "living it up" that I've done over the years (ha!). I don't want more medications that screw with my band or to be told that if you drop more weight or eat this and not that and do this and not that and all that smoke they like to blow around to justify the amount of money they charge my insurance company....(Stop. Now taking a breath......in.......out.....level set....and I'm back) So I'm getting older and I just don't rebound the way I used to. These sudden weather shifts bite and are literally a pain in the ass! Which makes me that more resolved to say I need to move to Hawaii!! I aspire to be a beach combing, whale spotting, sun catching, rainbow watching, sunset picture taking Lapband patient living in Hawaii. Sigh.....I am feeling better already. Mahalo!

I found this to be very profound! There are many that eat for sport. Not just to fuel their activities in the sports arena which we would like to think are those who are eating clean and healthy but this made me think about all those Hot Dog eating contests and other can you swallow half a cow at the local steak place. The "super size" orders we have for burgers and all other items on the fast food menus. We have stopped eating for health and for fuel and began eating for "sport". My son worked at a KFC and the sport for them was to get that order out the window in under 10 from start to finish. I used to watch my husband sit at the table and consume food as if it was a race to the finish line. It wasn't even cool enough to taste the flavor of it, the food barely touched the lips and was gone. We have since being banded changed the way we eat and even the way we look at and think about food. It is no longer a race or a sport to me. It's a source of energy and fuel that I need to live on, and if I slow down and think about what I am eating I can enjoy the aroma the taste and texture of it before I consume it. Give deference to the way it is prepared and those who are doing the preparation. To your question @@Kerry 5570 hunger is normal, as you begin to get some fills yes the band will help tamp that down for you so that you can determine if it's true hunger for food and the need to fuel your body or if that feeling is driven by something else. Being banded allows us to really examine what that something else is and identify it and our reactions to it. This is the time to work on all these things, when you feel that hunger coming along too soon before your next meal or you feel that hunger still clawing at you to have more or seconds, step away for a second and think about what that hunger is. If it's true hunger and your body needs some fuel then eat. If it's not..and it's thirst, or boredom or frustration, anger, sadness or anyone of the myriad things it could be then walk away from the food and try doing something fulfilling to off set those things. Listen to music, read, go for a walk, draw, write, sing, dance...what ever makes you happy. If your still hungry after that, have a bottle of Water, and if that's not doing it for you then your hungry eat something

@@Darlyn Dwan Rottkamp DeVoe This far out from surgery you should not be having that shoulder pain. Perhaps there is some gas trapped and you could try using a heating pad under you back shoulder to help things move along. If you are still having that discomfort I would give the Dr. a call and let them know, it could be something unrelated to the surgery. As for being hungry, I'm sorry to report what others have said above is true. Once your band is properly adjusted you will start to have less and less feelings of hunger. There are some who the band has worked with no fills, and then others who need to have a high fill level. I am struggling right along with you these days as I have had most of my fill removed due to a dilated pouch which happened due to medications that were irritating my stomach. I'm more hungry then I was, and I can eat much quicker and take larger bites then I could before...but I don't do that. I still take those 20 minutes to eat and then put my utensils down. I don't shovel the food in and I still cut things up and make them band sized bites and chew chew chew. This is the time to work on those band eating mechanics that will serve you very well as you move forward on the journey to your optimal band restriction level. So practice practice practice and you won't regret it. Also focusing on all those things while eating helps to distract you from being hungry. Add in some exercise if you haven't already and when your feeling true hunger eat. Manage the portion and practice good mechanics. If your not sure if your hungry or perhaps just bored get up and take a walk or do something that you enjoy to take your mind off of it until it's time to eat. You got this!

@@briefs199 It would definitely be great to see you at our support group in NYC the date is 10/25. Your making a big change in your life and that is something that is positive change for you, and if you work at it together for your spouse as well. It's not always easy when one person makes a change even if the change is personal and beneficial for health etc. It can open a gap in the relationship, leaving area's of grey where the other person had definition before. For example, perhaps he knows your favorite food, and now that will change. Perhaps he enjoys going out for beers with you and now that will change. He is thinking about what this surgery is going to mean for him and his relationship with you and who you are and who you are going to be...and how he is going to cope with that...but you are who you are and your husband might need some reassurance that a new "body" a thinner more healthy you is not going to change who you are, or how you feel about him. The key to all of this is communication!! You must sit down and talk with your husband. If a psych exam is part of your surgery, make an appointment to sit with your spouse and bring these topics up and give him the space to be able to ask the Dr.'s all the questions he might have even if you think he doesn't care I'm sure he's just afraid to voice his concerns and his fears about your choice. Most of all remember that this was YOUR choice. You can not force him to change his eating habits or his behavior to suit you. You must make the changes required of you for yourself, and adapt those changes in your life style to fit into your partnership. These are all do able and if you don't force your choices and changes on him or anyone you have a relationship with for that matter, you will find that they are more accepting and will be better able to embrace your new way of being rather then being resistant to it. The key to everything though is communication. You must speak out and let them know what you need and don't need and what is a trigger for you, if you clearly state your needs that does not mean that at the next party there won't be chips and dip but it does mean that when you don't stick your hand in the bowl your hostess is not offended that you are not eating her food, but understands that you have dietary restrictions. When you go out to eat with your husband you might not order the steak at his favorite steak place but you will sit and enjoy the Soup or the salad or what ever it is that is on your dietary menu even if it means your on a liquid diet and you drink your shake while he dines you will have a friend there who is on your side and ready to be your cheer leader because they will realize you are not trying to change them, you are only trying to make changes to give yourself a better life.

Did you ever have one of those days when your feeling "fat". I feel like I'm bloated today...retaining Water or what ever it is. I am going to "up" my water intake since it's been pretty low I have been drinking too much coffee the last few days and I have the feeling I"m a bit dehydrated. I just think it's odd how your body will retain water..and you feel bloated even my fingers are feeling fat today (which means my rings actually "fit" today instead of spinning around) and all this happens because you don't have enough water in your body. So strange...I mean I get the headache part of it..but not the bloated part of it. On top of that the weather today is going to be near 80 and I just have to say WTF? My body goes crazy when the weather swings from one extreme to the other. How about you all? Does that affect any of you?

You know I think we are so "conditioned" to beat ourselves up about your weight and blame ourselves for it because of the way we eat and the way we live. Our life style and our choices etc. It's really hard to put that stick down and stop beating ourselves with it. This weekend I did the same thing. We went away and we were on "vacation". I didn't think about food until I was hungry and that was a good thing. The bad thing was I was HUNGRY!! We did a bunch of walking, but still I can tell you with some humility that when it came time for lunch I was starving. Having had all the Fluid out of my band I am struggling a bit with that feeling. The positive is that I know when I am truly hungry and not just hungry for the sake of eating this or that. So we stopped for lunch but of course the places were packed and we waited too long and I was about ready to chew into the wooden seats! We ordered onion rings and truth be told I think I was good with that...but when the burger came out I decided I was not good with just some onion rings. Fat and calories behind them be dammed I needed some protein! I took the burger off the bun, kept the lettuce tomato and raw onion (yes my breath was lovely that afternoon!) Ate my burger and then I was "was" satisfied and full perhaps a ring or two over full. So we walked some more, and then went back to our suite...we thought about going out for dinner...but we were so tired from the day we stayed in. Ken had some Soup, (this girl scout is always prepared for everything!) I had some nuts and cheese and we enjoyed the night in. I guess not so "bad" but not so "good" either. We both looked at leach other with a bit o' guilt and I was about to get the bat out and start swinging...but WHY? Is that going to un-eat the food for me or him? Nah..it's just going to make me feel worse. So put the bat down and decided it was vacation and if I gained weight...so be it I had a great weekend! I haven't stopped going to the gym, I haven't stopped eating right 97.5% of the time..I have learned so much along the way including sometimes you just gotta eat the onion rings and the box of nerds so you can stay awake for 5 hours on the GB bridge heading home!!

@@Julie norton I never thought after 20 years of marriage I would ever get married again. We divorced after all that time and that is definitely different then being widowed. You must be going through so many emotions, I know those who divorce have loads of those as well, life can truly be a double edge sword to be handled with care that is for sure. I could share so many stories with you...someday if I don't lose my memory I will write them all down, but through it all the good the bad the ugly the painful the tragic and the senseless I have learned this to be true. Love is an amazing, awe inspiring thing right here on earth. Finding it, sharing it and cherishing it, no matter it's form is truly a miracle. Sending you some love {{xoxoxoxoxo}}

This weekend was our anniversary, and I have to share this with everyone here not because I am trying to be "braggy" that's not really my style but because I have never been so happy!! I was married for a long time to someone who just didn't get me and to be married again for the second time to someone who is so amazing, is just something I have to share with you all!! This is our second wedding anniversary, we have been going through lots this year. Major surgery, kid drama's work drama's we adopted two puppies...lots of stuff. So my gift to the hubs was to escape from Long Island and head upstate to Cooperstown and visit the Baseball hall of fame. I took him to the Hockey hall last year in Canada, this year vacation days are limited since we used them all up on just taking care of business. I got home on Thursday night, to a bedroom full of Balloons and Roses and he even hung a banner across the wall!! Previously he had taken me shopping and bought me a diamond ring that reminded me of one my mother had and for the techie in me the new iphone 6 with 128G so I can take all the photo's and work all the apps and just plain rule my world from my phone as I tend to do That was more then enough for me, and to come home to all that was beyond anything I would have expected and there was MORE. The second anniversary is cotton. (who knew?) so he had our names and initial embossed on a piece of cotton and had it matted and framed! He had a glass card engraved with our wedding song on it..and I was totally overwhelmed and touched beyond belief!! I gave him the tablet I bought him and took him away to a little B&B upstate for the weekend and we had a great time, the weather was awesome crisp and fall. The colors were amazing as the mountain ranges turned into a rainbow of color, most of those photo's are on the camera they were so magnificent! Our eating could have been better, we pretty much lived on coffee and lunch so I guess it could have been worse too Here are some photo's of the weekend, I hope you all had a great one as well!!