lisacaron

@@Sharpie you look awesome!! Congrats to you and the happy couple!! @@Julie norton Thank you for sharing the photo's!! You look amazing!! I'm a sucker I just love weddings and wedding fashion.

The reason is because the body does not tap into the fat stores for fuel as a default. The body is "lazy" for lack of a better word. It will burn every single thing you eat first...then it will attack your muscle and even your bone if it is easier to access. That is the reason that most WLS patients are told to keep Protein content high. You also want to build muscle vs just doing cardio work outs or your body is going to choose to use fuel other than fat stores. I get the physics, but physiology does not follow physics. Do some research on physiology and/or speak with a fitness trainer they will be able to explain what I am doing only lip service to here. As we strengthen muscle we squeeze fat out of the muscles, to create lean muscle mass. That fat removed from the muscle breakdown is the fat that is tapped for fuel during work outs. The more we do this the more we turn the "fat" stores we have under our skin into fuel. As they are they are not the right kind of fuel that the body wants to burn. Think of putting regular gas into a diesel truck....what happens? Stall.

@@Carrie81 practice practice practice. When you get the bad filled you are going to encounter more of this issue more often, and that can cause some damage. So, my advice is let your Dr. know what's going on, and continue to take your time when eating. My husband also had this issue of fast eating prior to surgery, he's a military fire fighter so for a large part of his life it has been rush rush rush because there was always an emergency or fire to put out. He has since learned to take it slow or suffer the consequences and no one likes that. Trust me from time to time it's going to happen. Sometimes I get so thirsty and chug my Water too fast only to have it come flying back out much to the chagrin of the person sitting across from me!! I did that once with coffee in my car and well I was pretty upset at myself!!! When I feel like I am in a rush, I try to breathe. Just stop and breathe. A nice deep breath, clears my head, lowers my blood pressure, calms me down, refocuses me and I can continue. The best part of it...no one knows anything is wrong, It doesn't raise attention, it's just a nice deep cleansing breath. Give it a try....now doesn't that feel great?

@@Julie nortonI wish You your Son and Daughter in Law much much happiness and a wonderful day!! Please do post some pictures!!!! I just LOVE weddings!!!

Let me help you to feel better....I have been the same weight for a while now. I work out and have been building muscle and my clothes are shrinking off my body. My weight however has been the same...the number on the scale hasn't moved though I have lost 2 dress sizes. Don't give up...just keep on working it and you will get where you want to be. Slow and steady wins the race.

If the body adjusts to needing 1200 calories a day and you burn 3000 calories a day the law of physics still should kick in and weight loss is still a must. It would be great if our body worked according to the laws of physics but they don't operate that way they operate under the law of survival. That is the most supreme rule of the human body such as it is. Even though we with our will force it into extreme situations. If you think about it we forced our body to adapt to being over weight and finding a place to put all the extra stuff we gave it. Now we are forcing it to adapt again on much much less in take. If we think of evolution of the human body, it amazes me how much we are able to adapt to and still survive. So yeah I think stalls are real after all it takes a minute for the mind and body to connect on what the objective is. It's not as simple as inserting a key into the ignition and off you go. There are many moving parts that all must be properly aligned calibrated and balanced and that's just for a car

@@CanyonBaby xoxoxox prayers and good intentions. You and Dave stay strong and keep that positive attitude and you will kick this thing into remission!!

OK so I have been pretty lucky when it comes to buying clothes. I hate clothes shopping, big small and all sizes in between. Online shopping just does not work for me because I am not a "single" size. I'm short and I have a small waist, I don't have huge hips but well yes I have one of those!! My pants size is smaller then my top size. I'm not exactly petite and I'm not "regular" so length is another issue. I need the space for the bust, but not the linebacker shoulders, or arm length that go with the size that fits the rest of the shirt. I do despise the shirts that are wide and short. I know there are some who have their weight around their hips but those of us with a belly need a longer shirt not a wider shirt, Shirts should be marked as wide or long. That said I think there are many more options for plus sizes in the world than there used to be. The fashion industry though they may not have in the past, are coming around to embrace the curves of America and other countries. We have to keep advocating for ourselves and demanding to see more options and going out there and affecting change! The biggest bugaboos I have when it comes to fashion is people not dressing in proportion to their size. If your big or your small or your anywhere in between if you feel like your stuffing 10 pounds into a 5 pound bag trust that it looks that way too. I don't care if your a 6 or a 16 if you need to wear a 20 it's just a number!!! Get the size that FITS you. If you bend over and it's a full moon... it's just too short!! If you lean over and the buoys are afloat then it's just too low cut. If you stand up and you have to de-wedge your clothes from any crevice on your body then it's just too small!! Spanks are not meant to constrict your breathing, or to help you lose 20 pounds in a single wearing. They were invented to enhance the line of your clothing against your body. If you can't sit down or you can't breath it's too tight!! If your wearing jeans and you can only do one of these zip or button them...they are too small go up a size! Open buttons and/or zippers...yeah don't go there. The ripped look shouldn't include the seams of your clothes. If it's ripped at the seams it's time for something new. If your busty you need a bra. Yes I know under wire is not fun, but you have options so go for a good bra fitting and note that bra's were not invented to be your hand bag. To fit properly they don't need to hold your cellphone, lipstick or money. OK I'll stop there

@@Sun Godess let me first say welcome, and thank you for posting and sharing your questions. There are many out there who are right where you are and I am sure have many of the same questions. You will find lots of support here and even more stories and advice. If you keep in mind that for every person there is an opinion and not all of them are going to align with each other then you are that far ahead. Every journey is subjective to the person experiencing it. For example my husband and I are both banded and were banded 3 days apart, so we have our bands from the same time, and went through the pre- and post op together. That said we are very different in our approach to food, our issues with food, and our weight loss. None of it bad...just different. So here are my answers to your questions 1. Are you satisfied with your lap band? Are you happy you chose the band over vsg? I am very happy I chose the band over VSG. I may have had more success with VSG in the early stages and with the lapband my weight loss is much slower and steadier, however I chose the lapband to accommodate my life style. I am not able to "adjust" any other WLS tool as I am with the lapband. I do not do so on a whim but for things like surgery, and sickness etc. with the lapband I am afforded that option and I like that. The lapband requires much more follow up and maintenance than the other WLS tools and I also like the fact that it keeps me accountable as well as my Dr. accountable to my health and well being. 2. I'm afraid of the unkown. Do you feel normal...like just living and being your normal self and don't know it's there? I am not afraid of the unknown. I am very in tune with my body and with my lapband Dr. to understand how it works and how it will work best for me. I live my life normally and I rarely think about my "band" I do not feel it inside though the port is accessible and can be felt under the skin it doesn't bother me at all. I eat and live my life fully as a banded patient. 3. Do you get used to eating little portions? Do you feel deprived? I never feel deprived. I eat the portions I am hungry for. I allow my hunger to dictate how much I am going to eat. There are days I am very hungry and require a little more than on other days when I am hardly hungry at all. So portions can fluctuate for me though they are much smaller than any thing I ate before surgery. If I am still hungry for something after I have had a good portion I will wait it out and ask myself if it's truly hunger or something else. It's usually something else. 4. I work on a team, and we eat lunch together and chat daily at work. I don't want to tell anyone at work. I'm afraid I won't be able to do this without them and or me having eating issues in front of them? Do you think I will be able to? What are your experiences? This is a tricky one. Your eating habits pre op and post op are going to change. You are going to be on liquid diets for a bit and you are also going to be eating foods that maybe different from what they are sitting down to eat. Sandwiches are probably going to be off your menu for a while (I don't eat bread at all in any form) Salads are something you will return to but not right away or all the time (not a bad thing since there isn't much Protein there and you can find lots of extra calories there also) I still eat with my co-workers and I go out to dinner with friends and events and parties. I chose to let everyone know about my surgery and they never question me about my choice of food. My eating habits are the same as they were before, though I will eat much slower now, I will chew much better, I take much smaller bites, and I rarely finish an entire meal on my own. If I am out with friends or my husband we will often share a meal or I have a nice lunch of left overs the next day to bring to work:) 5. I've heard many people say "oh, the band is only 25% of the help...It's really me." I'm hoping the band is A LOT of help, not a magic wand. No WLS is a magic wand. With the band your weight loss is going to be slow and steady. You are not going to lose 100 pounds over night. The more you work at it the more you will lose and the more success you will have with it. Other WLS will have a large amount of weight loss up front and then begin to taper off either way you have to work the tool to be successful. a GREAT help...more than 25% else wise, what's the point! What is your opinion/experience? How much help is the band for you? The band is a great help and an excellent tool when it is being used just like any other tool. If you don't take it out of the tool box then you are not working it just having it doesn't allow it to do it's job, you have to work it. You can make the band work for you 100% it shows up ever single day, it just needs you to show up for it as well. All WLS is the same. None of them affect our minds..WE have to put them to use. I love my band, when I want to have an emotional day of pigging out and just eating my face off because I am having a rough time (this is my personal issue...stress eating and emotional eating.) the band is there to remind me that I shouldn't be doing this to myself and when I push anyway it's there to smack me in the head and often stops me right in my tracks. 6. I need appetite suppression... Does the band actually do that? What exactly does the band do you for you? n How would you describe it? The band is all about appetite suppression. Many think that the band provides "restriction" this is not what the band is designed for. A properly adjusted band should allow you to eat and drink in proper proportion so you are satisfied at least 4 hours between meals. This is again provided you are following the proper direction and eating the proper foods. Foods that are soft and high calorie are going to slip right past the band without triggering the nerves that send satisfied signals to the brain. This in turn will cause you to eat more and usually those soft foods are high in calories and sugar. Things like ice cream and fried foods are things to watch out for. When I have a "meal" it consists of a solid dense protein. Chewing and eating allow me to feel full and the need to have additional food is not there. I am not hungry. Even when faced with the option of having more food, or sweets etc. I simply do not want it. As you go through the journey of learning to work with and live with your band you learn to eat mindfully and choose the right foods to hold you over. Though I will admit if you are like me, this is a big challenge. I often find myself wanting something...just because. However if I do try to have something just because...I am only able to eat a bite or two and I no longer want it and am turned off by it. This is what the band does for me. 7. Looking back, do you think you could have lost your weight without the band? I have lost weight many many times without surgery. I have lost it and found it again and again and usually when I would find it, it would bring along a few friends with it. I would lose 40 pounds only to gain 50. I would start exercise programs only to find myself ravenous and eating more and more and not losing an ounce. I have not for one second since I have been banded regretted my decision. Even when I had a few complications, such as a dilation, and had to have the Fluid removed from the band, or after surgery having one of the incisions become infected. The band has helped me to lose the weight in a healthy way, I have been able to keep off the all the weight I have lost and continue to keep losing. 8. I hear a lot about eating slow and small bites...I am very afraid of this! I don't want to be a spectacle in front of others or feel weirded out and miserable having to eat with baby spoons and pea size bites. I want to eat normal. How is this for you? I eat totally normally. Actually eating slowly and taking normal bites is how we should be eating all the time. Shoveling food into our mouths swallowing before we even had a chance to taste the food is not the normal way to eat. I don't obsess about cutting my pieces and no one at a party or out at dinner or events even notices. In fact they notice more the faster and more you eat I think. Even when my husband and I share a meal, no one even raises an eye brow. We were at an event just yesterday where we shared Eggplant rollatini. There were 4 huge rolls on the plate along with the Pasta side dish (neither of us ate that.) We shared some Calamari prior and shared the dinner. Even the waiter brought out extra plates for us and no one raised an eyebrow. 9. Any personal testimonies, advice or warnings? Please share and I am not specifically a lapband advocate but I am a WLS advocate who is banded!! I will tell anyone who asks me that if you are not healthy and you are experiencing co-morbidity due to your weight that looking into WLS is a positive thing to do for yourself. Having surgery has changed my life in many positive ways, and I feel healthy and more alive now than I had in years simply because I am not dragging all the extra weight around with me. I am not at goal, I am working my way there gradually. Eating what I like, making healthy choices, taking the time incorporate the changes and make them a part of my every day life. This is what I wanted and the way I wanted for it to be. Yes of course we all want a magic wand, and turn back the clock to when I was 16 and do it all over again...but that is not reality so the best thing I could aim for is working to be healthier and happier me. I didn't get to be morbidly obese overnight and I didn't want to find myself on the other side of that over night either. I wanted a healthy gradual weight loss emphasis on the healthy part of it since my health was not so great and I couldn't walk without feeling that heart attack was imminent. My best advice to you is to continue to research. Go out and meet Dr.'s not just one but a few. Ask them their opinions. If they tell you the sleeve or the bypass are better...ask them why they feel that way pick their brains and then of course share the results with all of us!! Research the other surgeries, there may be a reason why your Dr. recommends one over the others, and don't take anything off the table and don't do anything unless you are 100% sure and you have a Dr. who fully supports you. After care and follow up are very important no matter your WLS in my opinion this KEY. Having a good working relationship with your Dr. before, during and most importantly after surgery. I wish you all the best, and keep us updated on your progress and decision!!

@@KellyKub I am sorry you had a rough start in this journey. A few complications and the blessing of your daughter. 3 years later, and your band is waiting for you. I understand the reason for not wanting to do a fill, and asking you to keep a food journal for a bit. It's a way to be accountable. You know what you are eating and sure you know how you got to the weight you are at. So now you need to know if you want to make a turn and work on getting that 180 degree about face and lose the weight. Is it going to be easy? No it's not. Is it going to be fast? No it's not. Is it going to require you to work hard and be 100% honest with yourself? Yes it is. Is it going to be painful and emotional and occasionally break you down to tears? Yes my friend it is. Can you do this? YES you can!! The biggest questions are do you WANT to do it? and are you ready to do it? If you tell me YES, then honey start the dang food journal. You are banded...so start from day one! As if you just got your band. I do this when I lose my way. I will do liquids for a bit and then move through the stages. First, call that Dr. and tell them, yes TELL them you want at least a Fluro to check the band if not an upper GI Endoscopic exam to make sure that all is well. Then practice being a bandser again, and when you do that for a week or so go back to that Dr. and say you are ready for a fill. Then go slow and go back monthly and keep track of your hunger and when your ready start getting some exercise in there. You can do this, and you are not alone. We are all here...going through our own gambits and trying to reach or maintain our health. Ready to join us?

There are so many things that you go through as you move through the process to investigating surgery, prepping for surgery actually having surgery and then recovery from surgery. All of these things along with the physical changes that happen from the surgery it self all help to change your mind set about how to be successful, to find and maintain the life style that you want to live. I too am a food addict, I have been through all that you have been through. Most of us here can say that. Having this added WLS tool is what helps us to be successful because even when we fall short, that tool is there for us and it helps to keep us on our path. When we want to give up, it's there to remind you that no you really don't want to give up your just having a bad day. I set my goals, and let me tell you I have had more days than I want to admit to where I say ah, forget it. I'm tired or I am not doing to do this anymore and I want what I want. That usually works once for me, and then my WLS tool kicks in hits me upside my head and I learn the lesson really quick and I get back to doing things the way I should be. That is why this is different. When I went to weight watchers, the leader would try to motivate me, and the other WW in the group would try to keep us all on track and we would lose and gain and nothing ever sustained. Having WLS is not like that. It's not a diet it's the way my life is. I make choices of food based on hunger, knowing I'm not going to be able to devour the whole serving I choose the richest food first. It's just a change that becomes you.

We host Bariatric Pal Support groups monthly. Usually in NYC, we have yet to find a suitable venue on Long Island. I have been speaking with several of the Local Library's. There are several Atrium's in NYC that are open to the public and this is where we meet. Many venue's on Long Island are looking for a fee. We try to find venue's that are not food centered, though I am beginning to think that we may start gravitating to some of the more local coffee houses on Long Island just so we can begin to bring our groups out to the Island.

@ Fear is a powerful thing. It robs us of our freedom, if we allow it. Most of the time fear is what holds us back from doing all the things we want to do and becoming all that we could be. The only way to deal with fear is to face it head on. Bite the bullet so to speak, look it right in the eye and acknowledge it but don't give any more power over you. Once you stand up to fear (and if you think about it this way...standing up to fear is tantamount to standing up to and for yourself) you will see how really small and insignificant it can be. There are things in life that are to be respected, like Mother Nature. Her wrath can be very real in the form of tornado's hurricanes, landslides, earth quakes, Tsunami's. Yet we don't fear her, we respect her and we love her. The same has to be said for ourselves. I can see you facing your fears already by posting here and sharing your story with us. By reading our responses to you, you have become that much braver about the subject. You are just like all of us here. We have been obese, morbidly obese, super morbidly obese, down right FAT and we may have been called many many MANY names. Perhaps by kids, or mean spirited people and probably no so worse as the ones we have called ourselves. Today there is only one difference, we didn't let any of it stop us. We faced up to those mean words, those looks of disgust, our horrible photo's our medical illness, the fear of not walking the pain of sitting, standing, eating, not eating and even the fear of dying. Going one step at a time, we went through the process. We went to the meeting, we found the tolerable Protein Shakes (to be honest I still enjoy mine and go back to them when I need to) we found the ways that work for us and we work it every day and when we forget...or we are less than mindful we have each other, and we can look back at how far we have come and we keep on going. You can do this. Go to the meeting, love yourself enough to take back your power and see where it takes you. Sometimes we need a hand, and that is all weight loss surgery is. It is a tool to help you continue on your journey of life to be the best possible you that you can be.

I love all these posts!! I really really really hate to shop for clothes. I think I have ptsd from when I was a kid and a teenager. We would go shopping and my Mom would make me "try on" everything. Oh how I hated shopping for clothes!!! When I was older in my teen years and there was a wedding or something I was always the one that had to try on every freaking dress because I was the only one that could fit into the sample sizes!! As I got older and "fatter" I hated to get dressed up because I was always uncomfortable stuffed into some torture garment to hold it all in and together and then into some dress that if your farted might rip at the seams. Shoes that pinched because I think all the fat the garment squeezed would end up in my feet Now I like to get dressed up and not feel like 10 pounds of crap stuffed into a 5 pound bag. I like to find clothes that are comfortable and wearable. I have to go shopping today to find something for a grad party...house party. I hope the weather holds up

OMG you guys are brave! I could never snip them off!! I have had skin tags in area's that are NOT friction related and probably not obesity related either. I had them around my eyes, and I heard that it can be caused by a deficiency of some sort and a million and one other things. I tried that skin tag off stuff on one that was on my neck near my necklace line and it did not work. I have had a co-worker that had them on her neck also and she would tie them off with dental floss at the base to choke off the blood supply and then they would fall off but that also felt like torture to me...I don't think I could do it to myself. In the end I went to a plastic surgeon and had him remove them all. I wasn't about to start snipping or let anyone else snip around my eyes and on my face. While he did my face and neck and asked if I had any others he removed them from under arm that had been there for years and years as well. Nice to be tag free...though one right under my eye at the top of my cheek is starting to come back again..it's OK b/c now I know it's not terrible to have them taken off

@@Debbie yes that is my middle son Nick visiting for Mothers Day and doing great! Congrats on the good news!!

Sigh...sometimes all we can do is love them and accept them for who they are. I have learned that you can not make anyone do anything or change anything that they are not ready to, even if it's killing them. All you can do is show your love and support and be there if they ever come to you.

Thanks, that was an interesting article. I'm one of those stress people with high adrenaline issues!

@@DeezJeanz are you looking to join the challenges or the VIP group?

Glad you ladies had a Happy Mother's Day. I did as well, though the weekends just go too darn fast!! Hubs and I spent Saturday morning/afternoon literally moving a mountain! Yes a mountain of dirt! Top soil to coat the back yard so we can plant some grass and get things going nicely for the summer. We had about 6 yards of the stuff delivered and had to shovel wheel barrels full and wheel it into the back yard from the front and then spread it out with the rake and hoe over the terrain in the back. I kind of was feeling like what a farmer might feel like back in the day before they had machines to do all this stuff. Here we are with no machines doing it the "hard" way. Needless to say after the gym on Friday and then all that work on Sat I am a bit sore, not as sore as I would have been in the past with the extra weight heck we probably would have just left it and said let it be sand we don't need grass I got to see the kids on Sunday briefly which was just perfect for me, we say his mother and then went out east to Joe's Crab Shack for a nice dinner together. I went shoe shopping at DSW and they were nearly empty! My kind of shopping I HATE crowds and rude people. Hubs spoils me as always, as do the kids..now if they would have washed my car I would have been in heaven but it's best to keep it real Here are some photo's...Ugh lots of dirt!!

@@AussieSam I can commiserate with you on this. I get myself bogged into the same loop and @@CowgirlJane is right we are falling back into bad habits because it's what we know and it's easy when our minds are so tangled in other things. It's easier to resort to what we know. In my way I know it's also a psychological game I play with myself. You see I am not an unhappy fat person. I don't think I look bad, I don't feel the need to be rail thin. In fact I don't find that physique at all attractive on a man or woman. So for me..when my clothes start to look baggy and my rings start sliding around I had a hard time accepting that it was time to just get new clothes that fit better vs. making myself fit better in the clothes I was wearing. I need to be a healthy person and that means I need to be a slimmer person, and so once I was able to change some of my thinking I have been able to stay on the wagon even though I'm doing 101 diverse things at once, I now make sure to find the time to schedule in what I need to keep me healthy and that means eating right and going to the gym and that also means not falling into the quick fix sugar trap for me. That's my "go to" when I'm sluggish, and peckish it doesn't sustain for long, and sometimes I have to argue with myself to not grab the easy fix pretzel rods on the desk top so I can keep plugging away, but to get up and make a shake or flavor some Water and drink that..or just go take a walk get some air and come back to it. Worst case I'll pop a piece of sugar free gum. Like Nike says you just have to "do it". Some days it's a battle in my head with myself and I like to win, though I will admit there are days the pretzel rods win.

@@CowgirlJane you are 100% right. We have to remember that just because we are not "fitness experts" we know our bodies better than anyone else. We know when too much is too much and often we will be really good at pushing ourselves. It takes a well trained fitness trainer to know when to push and when to back off. Interview your trainers and if your feeling something is too much or too heavy say something. Remember when you are working out blood is flowing and endorphin's are high and you may not feel any "pain" but if you are feeling resistance is too much or you are fatigued after a certain number of reps don't push for another 10 when you may have only 1 or 2 more in you. Going for the rest is going to hurt you and it's not about no pain no gain. We want to loose not gain It's the same for cardio. If you are running or rowing or spinning or zuming or what ever your choice of cardio is at too high of a heart rate you are not burning fat, your burning muscle and you don't want that. You want to build muscle and burn fat. Do the calculation for your age/weight/height and try to stay as near as you can to your target heart rate. The longer you can go at that pace the more fat you will burn. I will also offer this advice, that I got from the training director. If you are going to work out with your trainer do not do cardio before your work out! Warm up for a few minutes...5 to 10 at most and then do your work out. To maximize the benefits of fat burning do your cardio work out after your strength building exercises, and always stretch don't "over" stretch after your work outs, a simple floor mat stretch is good enough. The stretching should not be a yoga class, or a work out in itself.

@@JustWatchMe you go girl!!! I love working with the trainer. I will say this though, you have to find the right one to work with you. I actually switched gym locations and found a trainer with a background in PT so that when we work out he is aware of the issues I have with my back and neck and so far it's been really successful and the pain in my back and neck are minimized. I want to work out and get fit and lose weight but also still be able to sit and stand and sleep without being in crippling pain. It took me a little while but there are trainers out there that know about RA and other bone/joint issues and can work with us, it's so important to know about the client and their health. Go US!!! I'll be at the gym tonight with the trainer for an hour and then at least 30 min. of cardio. Woot Woot.

Here is one tip for the ladies...work out those pecks!! The muscles that we have under those lady lumps helps to keep them in place. It's just like every other area...build muscle lose fat. So not being one to work out those muscles, let me tell ya...the soreness...ugh but in the end it's worth it to keep them from hitting the floor

That was great. Totally inspirational stuff there and awesome creativity!