carol1951

RvingDi--went for a fill today 10-23-2007. I'm at 3.7 cc in my 4cc band. I still want to eat. I'm lost when I'm not eating. Eating is such a big part of my life, but I'm determined to beat this addiction. I want to lose at least 10 lbs before we go on vacation in January. Keep up the good work.

I'm really questioning what the h*** I'm doing. Idon't know what I want. I know I want to lose weight, but I don't seem to want to do the work. I don't want to be hungry and sometimes I am and somethings I'm not. Sometimes its head hunger and sometimes I really am hungry. I just want to be normal and lose weight like all the other people. I really thought that I would not have hunger and that I would only be able to eat a small amount. Well neither has happen. I can still eat a horse, although I do have to chew,chew an eat slow slow. I really believed that I would only be able to eat 1/2 cup, not the 2 cups I eat most of the time. I thought I would not be hungry, I knew that I would have fight the head hunger, but its really hard to fight head hunger when you don't feel full. Sometimes I'm really down and other times I glad I have the band. I know I would have gained durning the last seven months instead of losing. I'm glad that I have lost 35 lbs, but I'm still in all my big clothes and I'm tired of all big clothes. I want to wear cute clothes that are smaller and in style. I feel like a loser most of the time. I read how everyone is doing so great and here I am with only a 35 lb lost. How am I going to do this so that I win and I don't lose my self respect. I know that I can do this. I guess I need some great ideas. I can still do this, I know I have to do this one day at a time, but the days are so long when you struggle all day. I should not be in pitty pot all time eihter. How do I get off that pot? How do I stop worring all the time about food. I just feel like that all I do is think of food and I really though I would get over that when I wasn't hungry all the time. I need some major help.

Sorry to hear that. If we could do it on our own we would have. Thank God all I have to do is talk with the doctors nurse. They seem to go on what we feel like. They always ask if I am hungry or do I eat snacks. Sure hope it not terribly hard for you. I will be thinking of you and thanking God I don't have to do it on will.

Forget what the dietician says what does your doctor say. We wouldn't have gotten the band if we could do it on our own with willpower. I would be talking with the doctor.

Does anyone have a answer for this. Why is it so different for so many people? Why do some people have restriction with 1 cc and why do some not get restriction till it filled full? I have tried to figure this out, but it just doesn's make any sense to me. Thanks Momlambert, I hoping this one does the trick. Your on your way to onerland and I'm just green thinking about it. Congrats.

I just got back from the doctors office. I got another .2cc in my band. I hope this works. I really want to be able to get that magical 1/2 cup that I see everyone talking about. I still have been able to eat 1 1/2 cups to 2 cups and I really want to lose weight. I'm going to Florida in January and I hope to be down another 10 lbs. I will have to work really hard to get there with the holidays just around the corner. I'm not real upset that I had gain 1lb this past six weeks. I knew that I'm not anywhere near perfect. I really don't make good decisions when it come to food. I know I'm a emotional eater and that I will have more to over come than a lot of people. Well my challenge is to lose 10 lbs by January 15. Let's see if I can do it.

I just got back from the doctors office. I got another .2cc in my band. I hope this works. I really want to be able to get that magical 1/2 cup that I see everyone talking about. I still have been able to eat 1 1/2 cups to 2 cups and I really want to lose weight. I'm going to Florida in January and I hope to be down another 10 lbs. I will have to work really hard to get there with the holidays just around the corner. I'm not real upset that I had gain 1lb this past six weeks. I knew that I'm not anywhere near perfect. I really don't make good decisions when it come to food. I know I'm a emotional eater and that I will have more to over come than a lot of people. Well my challenge is to lose 10 lbs by January 15. Let's see if I can do it.

Just got back from the doctor, they added another .2 cc in my band I'm now at 3.7cc in my 4cc band. I hope this works. I had gain one pound this past 6 weeks. I hope I get to the place where I can only eat that magical 1/2 cup that see other talking about. On liquids for the next couple of days, hope all goes well.

I weighted this morning, the first time in a week and I still weight the same. I haven't lost a thing in six weeks. I have no one to blame but myself. I just can't get with the program. I still am not eating as much as I use to, but I'm not always making the best choices. I still try to peddle just not on the regular bases that I need too. I wish I didn't have a fear of dogs, I would love to get out and walk. I know I could go to the mall, but the mall is not really close. Maybe it just and excuse not to excerise. I have never been very fond of excerise. I have thought about join the Y, but I need to find out how expense that is. I really don't have a lot of extra money right now. I thought about getting a part time job, but my knees still hurt most of time. I don't know if I could stand on my knee for hours. I mustn't complain. I'm so much better off then a lot of people. I will stay the course and be glad that I haven't gained.

I weighted this morning, the first time in a week and I still weight the same. I haven't lost a thing in six weeks. I have no one to blame but myself. I just can't get with the program. I still am not eating as much as I use to, but I'm not always making the best choices. I still try to peddle just not on the regular bases that I need too. I wish I didn't have a fear of dogs, I would love to get out and walk. I know I could go to the mall, but the mall is not really close. Maybe it just and excuse not to excerise. I have never been very fond of excerise. I have thought about join the Y, but I need to find out how expense that is. I really don't have a lot of extra money right now. I thought about getting a part time job, but my knees still hurt most of time. I don't know if I could stand on my knee for hours. I mustn't complain. I'm so much better off then a lot of people. I will stay the course and be glad that I haven't gained.

I go next week for another fill. I'm at 3.5 and can still eat way to much. I really do want to get to the place where I only eat 1/2 cup like other do. I'm losing really slow also. I still feel hungry and I want to lose that feeling also. Glad to know that I'm not the only one that is over 3.5 on their 4cc band. I just want lose.

I'm really questioning what the h*** I'm doing. Idon't know what I want. I know I want to lose weight, but I don't seem to want to do the work. I don't want to be hungry and sometimes I am and somethings I'm not. Sometimes its head hunger and sometimes I really am hungry. I just want to be normal and lose weight like all the other people. I really thought that I would not have hunger and that I would only be able to eat a small amount. Well neither has happen. I can still eat a horse, although I do have to chew,chew an eat slow slow. I really believed that I would only be able to eat 1/2 cup, not the 2 cups I eat most of the time. I thought I would not be hungry, I knew that I would have fight the head hunger, but its really hard to fight head hunger when you don't feel full. Sometimes I'm really down and other times I glad I have the band. I know I would have gained durning the last seven months instead of losing. I'm glad that I have lost 35 lbs, but I'm still in all my big clothes and I'm tired of all big clothes. I want to wear cute clothes that are smaller and in style. I feel like a loser most of the time. I read how everyone is doing so great and here I am with only a 35 lb lost. How am I going to do this so that I win and I don't lose my self respect. I know that I can do this. I guess I need some great ideas. I can still do this, I know I have to do this one day at a time, but the days are so long when you struggle all day. I should not be in pitty pot all time eihter. How do I get off that pot? How do I stop worring all the time about food. I just feel like that all I do is think of food and I really though I would get over that when I wasn't hungry all the time. I need some major help.

I don't know if I don't want to lose weight or if I'm scared to lose weight, but I just keeping shooting myself in the foot all the time. I eat all the wrong foods most of the time. I know I shouldn't eat it, but I do it anyway. Breakfast is still just a protien shake if its early it just doesn't want to go down. Then around 10 or 11 I eat chips, crackers or cheese. Then when its lunch time I skip it or I'm to full from all the junk that I don't eat. Then around 3 I'm hungry and can't hardly stand it, so I eat something easy like chip, crackers or cheese. I really don't eat many sweets cause I know I can't keep them in the house. I do crave chocolate. My DH is not a sweet person so thats why I have the chips and crackers. I don't usually, in the past, eat ice cream although here lately I can't seem to get enough of it. I guess I'm going to have to not buy that either. I'm lost on what to eat for lunch. I can't eat bread it just doesn't want to go down. I do eat salad some, I've done tuna or chichen salad some, soup alot. I have trouble with chicken and some beef. I think I'm not chewing my food good enough and if I'm too hungry I eat to fast so I need to slow down and eat slower. I really did do good in Texas, but maybe that was because I didn't have to cook or think about it. I was moving more while I was gone. I really need to excerise more, walking is good. I need to find some excerises that don't require me to get down on the floor. I have a really hard time getting up off the floor with my bad knee. I need to work on my stomach it is getting floppy and my butt is sagging. I still am wearing my 3x's and I have lost 35 lbs. I really want to go down in the sizes, but I have this big butt and stomach. My arms are flopping in the wind so need to get some excerise the will tighten them up. I NEED HELP. I WILL DO THIS IF TAKE ME YEARS. I KNOW I HAVE TO PUT MORE EFFORT IN TO IT. NO ONE BUT ME CAN DO THIS. I HAVE TO STOP BUYING THING THAT I KNOW I CAN EAT THAT ARE NOT GOOD FOR ME. I NEED TO GET AN ANOTHER FILL AND HOPE THAT THE AMOUNT THAT I CAN EAT GOES DOWN TO 1/2 CUP AMOUNTS. I MUST KEEP MYSELF BUSY, IF I'M BUSY I DON'T EVEN THINK OF FOOD. THE MORE I DO THE MORE I WILL BE ABLE TO DO. THE MORE I EXCERISE THE STRONGER I WILL GET. I CAN DO THIS. I feel so alone in this struggle. I need to find a good support group that is close to home, wonder how to find a group. I need to find some friends that understand my struggle.

I don't know if I don't want to lose weight or if I'm scared to lose weight, but I just keeping shooting myself in the foot all the time. I eat all the wrong foods most of the time. I know I shouldn't eat it, but I do it anyway. Breakfast is still just a protien shake if its early it just doesn't want to go down. Then around 10 or 11 I eat chips, crackers or cheese. Then when its lunch time I skip it or I'm to full from all the junk that I don't eat. Then around 3 I'm hungry and can't hardly stand it, so I eat something easy like chip, crackers or cheese. I really don't eat many sweets cause I know I can't keep them in the house. I do crave chocolate. My DH is not a sweet person so thats why I have the chips and crackers. I don't usually, in the past, eat ice cream although here lately I can't seem to get enough of it. I guess I'm going to have to not buy that either. I'm lost on what to eat for lunch. I can't eat bread it just doesn't want to go down. I do eat salad some, I've done tuna or chichen salad some, soup alot. I have trouble with chicken and some beef. I think I'm not chewing my food good enough and if I'm too hungry I eat to fast so I need to slow down and eat slower. I really did do good in Texas, but maybe that was because I didn't have to cook or think about it. I was moving more while I was gone. I really need to excerise more, walking is good. I need to find some excerises that don't require me to get down on the floor. I have a really hard time getting up off the floor with my bad knee. I need to work on my stomach it is getting floppy and my butt is sagging. I still am wearing my 3x's and I have lost 35 lbs. I really want to go down in the sizes, but I have this big butt and stomach. My arms are flopping in the wind so need to get some excerise the will tighten them up. I NEED HELP. I WILL DO THIS IF TAKE ME YEARS. I KNOW I HAVE TO PUT MORE EFFORT IN TO IT. NO ONE BUT ME CAN DO THIS. I HAVE TO STOP BUYING THING THAT I KNOW I CAN EAT THAT ARE NOT GOOD FOR ME. I NEED TO GET AN ANOTHER FILL AND HOPE THAT THE AMOUNT THAT I CAN EAT GOES DOWN TO 1/2 CUP AMOUNTS. I MUST KEEP MYSELF BUSY, IF I'M BUSY I DON'T EVEN THINK OF FOOD. THE MORE I DO THE MORE I WILL BE ABLE TO DO. THE MORE I EXCERISE THE STRONGER I WILL GET. I CAN DO THIS. I feel so alone in this struggle. I need to find a good support group that is close to home, wonder how to find a group. I need to find some friends that understand my struggle.

Got back from Texas yesterday and I soooo glad to be home. I really missed that new bed, the sleep number bed. It was really nice down there, the temps were in the middle 80's most of the time. My aunts house is really cute. The dogs are something else, but they were nice and when they are sleeping you would never of guess that there was 8 dogs in the house. The really great news is I didn't gain any weight while I was there:whoo::whoo:. My sister did really good on the flight down and back. It was a little bumpy coming home. I now have to get busy and try to lose more weight before the holidays get here. It's not that long till thanksgiveing and Christmas is right around the block and coming fast. I now that this is going to be a great week.

Got back from Texas yesterday and I soooo glad to be home. I really missed that new bed, the sleep number bed. It was really nice down there, the temps were in the middle 80's most of the time. My aunts house is really cute. The dogs are something else, but they were nice and when they are sleeping you would never of guess that there was 8 dogs in the house. The really great news is I didn't gain any weight while I was there:whoo::whoo:. My sister did really good on the flight down and back. It was a little bumpy coming home. I now have to get busy and try to lose more weight before the holidays get here. It's not that long till thanksgiveing and Christmas is right around the block and coming fast. I now that this is going to be a great week.

Don't know why some nights I just can't sleep. I need to sleep tonight have a lot to do tomorrow. I leave Thursday for a weekend at my Aunts house in Texas. I still need to pack and pay bills and run some errands tomorrow. I have so much on my mind and just doesn't want to shut down tonight so here it is 3:30 and I'm still awake. I was due to get a fill yesterday, but I postponed that till I get back. I was afraid that anymore in my band might make me to full right now. I'm at 3.5 cc in my 4 cc band and didn't want to get somewhere and not be able to enjoy myself. I haven't lost any weight in the last 4 weeks. I just bounce around the 265 mark. Some days I'm at 262 or 263 then the next I'm back at 265. I hope this goes down one of these days. I really need to make better choices. I always start out strong then get weaker as the day wears on. I have found that my protien shakes really help, some days I have them for breakfast and other days I have them for lunch. I wish I could leave cheese alone, guess I will just have to quit buying it like I did with cookies. Well hope this trip goes good, since I'm going with my sister and she doesn't like to fly. It's a short flight only 2 hours and its non-stop so that should help. I hope I get sleepy soon or its going to be time to get up for the day. I not sleepy yet.

Don't know why some nights I just can't sleep. I need to sleep tonight have a lot to do tomorrow. I leave Thursday for a weekend at my Aunts house in Texas. I still need to pack and pay bills and run some errands tomorrow. I have so much on my mind and just doesn't want to shut down tonight so here it is 3:30 and I'm still awake. I was due to get a fill yesterday, but I postponed that till I get back. I was afraid that anymore in my band might make me to full right now. I'm at 3.5 cc in my 4 cc band and didn't want to get somewhere and not be able to enjoy myself. I haven't lost any weight in the last 4 weeks. I just bounce around the 265 mark. Some days I'm at 262 or 263 then the next I'm back at 265. I hope this goes down one of these days. I really need to make better choices. I always start out strong then get weaker as the day wears on. I have found that my protien shakes really help, some days I have them for breakfast and other days I have them for lunch. I wish I could leave cheese alone, guess I will just have to quit buying it like I did with cookies. Well hope this trip goes good, since I'm going with my sister and she doesn't like to fly. It's a short flight only 2 hours and its non-stop so that should help. I hope I get sleepy soon or its going to be time to get up for the day. I not sleepy yet.

I wondering if I made a mistake in getting the band, its not working for me the way I thought it would. I can still eat way to much and I don't make the best decisions. I got the band thinking it would limit how much I could eat, but I still can eat just about anything I want to. I have never got down to only 1/2 cup. I can eat about 2cups at a time. I have to slow down to eat or I pb but I still cant eat to much. I feel like I have screwed up everything. I'm so weak when it come to eating. I love to cook and now I try not to, but I still have to cook something or else I will just eat anything. I have don't buy cookies or pies anymore and I sure don't buy cake. I made one for my husband a couple of weeks ago and I had to throw the rest of it out because I just couldn't leave it a lone. I could eat till I puke I think. What is wrong with you, are you just an crazy old woman, who should have just left things the way the were and just been fat the rest of your life. I do feel better, but my knees are sore most of the time and I have no energy. I really sometimes I feel like it was a mistake to get the band. I know people are looking at me wondering when I'm going to lose weight. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME???

Can't believe that its October already, seem like it was just July yesterday. I haven't lost anymore weight, but I have no one to blamel, but myself. I really need to get a move on. I don't eat as much, but still can:faint: eat the wrong things. The wrong things go down way to easy. I have had a couple of pb's this past week and it seem if I eat to fast that's when it happens. I hope I'm getting closer on my fills. I have 3.5 cc in my 4cc band, but I not anywhere close to just eat 1/2 cup at a time. I may have stretched my pouch out. I just don't know. I just have no will power. I just eat when I'm sad, happy, hungry, not hungry. I can eat anytime, anywhere. I just don't understand what is wrong with me. I know I want this,but I guess I just don't want it bad enought to give up everything. I don't buy cookies anymore, I havn't had a diet coke, or bread since 3-19-2007. I can still eat ice cream, chips, cant eat muffins, can eat cake, can't eat pizza crust, can eat the topping off of pizza. I'm trying to peddle everyday, but today my knee is really sore. I need to join the Y, but I limited on money right now. So guess I'm just having a pitty party today. I have felt really weepy all day and really don't know why. Hope tomorrow is a better day than today.:faint::faint:

Don't feel alone, it must be a six month slump. I'm in the same boat. I was giving myself a pep talk just this morning. If you want it you will make. Just hang in there this to shall pass.

This week has really sucked. I have really really been bad, I have over ate at most meals. Sunday was the worst day for eating I have had since I started this journey. I just grazed all day, on anything that would stand still. Yesterday was really not bad, but I was sitting and sewing all day. I lost a screw out of my pedometer and I can't track my walking right now, it was what held the clip on. I still know that I didn't walk enought yesterday. I did get all my quilt blocks done and now I need to put them together. I will have to find time to go back to my sisters to do that. I need to start tracking my food intake again and my fix my pedometer. I really miss the pedometer it was like a game to see if I would walk more then the day before. Some days I walk a lot and some day I don't walk very much at all. I have gained this week,so I have to get my head back in the game. I not ready to stop losing yet. I do feel a lot better and I have only lost 36 lbs, so I need to get with the program and lose lose lose. I know I can do this. I know that I will feel every better. I know that I will look a lot better. I know I will like the way I look a better. I know I will feel more normal. I know I will like myself better if I'm sucessful. I know that I can do this all by myself. I know that I'm alone in this journey, no one can do it for me. This is the path I have choosen for myself. This is the right path for me. I know that I will have bad days and I know I will have good days. I know I will question everything and anything that I do everyday. I know that it will take time to suceed in this journey. I know there will be day that I get discourged and I must just ride the wave that day. I know that I weight myself way to much. I know that I put way to much weight on what the scale says. I know I will do this.

This week has really sucked. I have really really been bad, I have over ate at most meals. Sunday was the worst day for eating I have had since I started this journey. I just grazed all day, on anything that would stand still. Yesterday was really not bad, but I was sitting and sewing all day. I lost a screw out of my pedometer and I can't track my walking right now, it was what held the clip on. I still know that I didn't walk enought yesterday. I did get all my quilt blocks done and now I need to put them together. I will have to find time to go back to my sisters to do that. I need to start tracking my food intake again and my fix my pedometer. I really miss the pedometer it was like a game to see if I would walk more then the day before. Some days I walk a lot and some day I don't walk very much at all. I have gained this week,so I have to get my head back in the game. I not ready to stop losing yet. I do feel a lot better and I have only lost 36 lbs, so I need to get with the program and lose lose lose. I know I can do this. I know that I will feel every better. I know that I will look a lot better. I know I will like the way I look a better. I know I will feel more normal. I know I will like myself better if I'm sucessful. I know that I can do this all by myself. I know that I'm alone in this journey, no one can do it for me. This is the path I have choosen for myself. This is the right path for me. I know that I will have bad days and I know I will have good days. I know I will question everything and anything that I do everyday. I know that it will take time to suceed in this journey. I know there will be day that I get discourged and I must just ride the wave that day. I know that I weight myself way to much. I know that I put way to much weight on what the scale says. I know I will do this.

When you get to the sweet spot, you will still have to watch want you eat. You will not be hungry, but the head hunger is hard to control. I find myself grazing and then realize that I'm not hungry, just old habits that still come back to haunt me. I think we will alway have to be very aware of what we are doing. I also think the band helps along the way to be more aware of what we are doing. Good luck and stick with it, I think down the road you will be glad you did it.

I believe I have finely have restriction. Its not bad, just can't eat to fast or to big a bite. I have to chew really good anything solid, like chicken, roast beef, or some veggies. I really excited and hopeful this will do the trick and I will start losing faster. I really want to lose this weight and I really don't want to take 5 years to do it. If it does take 5 years that will be ok, just as long as I don't every go back to where I was. I have lost 36 lbs and that only a fraction of what I need to lose, but at least I didn't gain. I just spent the last two day quilting with my sister and I didn't get my excersise, but I didn't gain. I didn't get enough water either. My sisters ice tasted funny to me and I just couldn't get anything that tasted good. I really didn't over eat. I now feel full most of the time. I still have to stop myself from just grazing, which is what I alway did before. My brother had his knee replaced on Monday and is going home today. He's really doing good, I'm very proud of him and the way that he doing. Its hard to keep a old farmer down. Everything going fine for now.