carol1951

Marilyn, I don't want anyone of us to feel alone. That is what this thread is all about. I have only lost 35 lbs since March and gained back 5lb. The doctor did a barium swallow to see if everything was ok and it is. They think I just don't have enough fill. So the gave me another .2cc yesterday, will see. Yes I get very discourged and wonder if I did the right thing in getting the band. But I know if I hadn't gotten the band I would be even heavier than I am right now. I also understand the feeling of being a loser, with every watching and asking "how much have you lost". So this thread is a great place to express thoses feeling, and no one is going to judge anyone.

Your right this whole thing is a learning process. Everyday I learn something, I don't alway do what I learn. I know that I need to excersise more, but I choose not to. I know the band can't do it all, but I want it to. Yes your are right, we make the choices and the choices make us.

I feel your pain. I haven't lost anything in months and have gain a few lbs. I saw my doctor today and go another fill and I'm now at 3.9. I really hoping this will do the trick. I need to keep better track of my carb which I know I get to much. I have had very little restriction. So maybe you need to get a fill and see if that would jump start you weight lost again. Just wanted you to know that you are not alone. We are here for you.

Well I'm back from the doctors and I had gained 4 lbs. I told her that I don't always make the must choices. I can't eat bread and have to be careful with chicken and beef. I can eat to fast and need really chew my food. She told me she wanted to do a barium swallow to make sure the pounch and my esphougus was not stretched. So the swallow test turn out fine. So she put in 1cc and the had me drink water and started pulling out fluid till if felt the water do down. So ended up with another .2cc in my band. I now have 3.9cc in band. Will see if this makes a differance. I have been able to eat just about anything I want. I have never be restricted to just a 1/2 cup of food. I hope this makes a differance this time. I would love to drop a few pounds I know I have to do my part and start working the band. I'm doing much better. I have not brought any cookies or candy in a long time. I'm trying to eat my protien first. I need to decrease my carbs. Well today is a new day and I'm having a protien shake right now. So far so good. I don't feel like I'm a tight. Well see what the rest of the week brings. Got to get busy I have a tree to decorate.

Well I'm back from the doctors and I had gained 4 lbs. I told her that I don't always make the must choices. I can't eat bread and have to be careful with chicken and beef. I can eat to fast and need really chew my food. She told me she wanted to do a barium swallow to make sure the pounch and my esphougus was not stretched. So the swallow test turn out fine. So she put in 1cc and the had me drink water and started pulling out fluid till if felt the water do down. So ended up with another .2cc in my band. I now have 3.9cc in band. Will see if this makes a differance. I have been able to eat just about anything I want. I have never be restricted to just a 1/2 cup of food. I hope this makes a differance this time. I would love to drop a few pounds I know I have to do my part and start working the band. I'm doing much better. I have not brought any cookies or candy in a long time. I'm trying to eat my protien first. I need to decrease my carbs. Well today is a new day and I'm having a protien shake right now. So far so good. I don't feel like I'm a tight. Well see what the rest of the week brings. Got to get busy I have a tree to decorate.

I'm still surprised to learn that this is a learning process. Its takes some of us longer than other, but we all learn sometime. Right?

I would like to be down another 20 lbs by March 20th. Not anywhere near where I want to be, but I can be happy with 20 lbs.

I'm thinking that I'm not doing so bad. I haven't lost anything in serveral months and that is really a dispointment. On the other hand I haven't gained either which is a major step for me at this time of the year. I go tomorrow to the doctor so will see what they have to say about my weight. I know I'm not working the band the way I should, but I do watch every bite that goes into my mouth good or bad. I'm trying to not buy anything that is sweet or to high in fat content. I feel a little stronger when fighting against my food addiction. I know I can win this battle some day its just going to take time. I have to just wait it out. Right now my stomach is growling it time to eat breakfast, but still have trouble in the morning with food going down. I'm learning to eat slower. Eating to fast is a big problem for me. All the years I ate so fast that I didn't even taste food. I guess I just wanted to fill up the hole in me and eating fast worked some of the time. I now still eat the bad stuff but I can't eat the any where as much as I did before the band. I also have to work on taking smaller bites, sometimes I forget and then the worst thing happens PB. So this is a learning process and I guess it just takes me a little longer to learn. I fight change in anything I do, so I will do it. It will just take time for me to make the changes. So I'm not unhappy as I was because I realize now that this is a learning process. So I go next week to my primary care doctor and will see how my labs are doing. I'm not thinking my HGBAC1 will be any better than it was the last time I went. I haven't been excersising as much as I should and we did just go through Halloween and Thanksgiving. If its under 6.5 I will be happy. It was 5.8 last time, but my med was cut in half. So if its under 6.5 I will be happy. Well we will see what the say tomorrow at the doctor. I know I can do this it will just take time.

I'm thinking that I'm not doing so bad. I haven't lost anything in serveral months and that is really a dispointment. On the other hand I haven't gained either which is a major step for me at this time of the year. I go tomorrow to the doctor so will see what they have to say about my weight. I know I'm not working the band the way I should, but I do watch every bite that goes into my mouth good or bad. I'm trying to not buy anything that is sweet or to high in fat content. I feel a little stronger when fighting against my food addiction. I know I can win this battle some day its just going to take time. I have to just wait it out. Right now my stomach is growling it time to eat breakfast, but still have trouble in the morning with food going down. I'm learning to eat slower. Eating to fast is a big problem for me. All the years I ate so fast that I didn't even taste food. I guess I just wanted to fill up the hole in me and eating fast worked some of the time. I now still eat the bad stuff but I can't eat the any where as much as I did before the band. I also have to work on taking smaller bites, sometimes I forget and then the worst thing happens PB. So this is a learning process and I guess it just takes me a little longer to learn. I fight change in anything I do, so I will do it. It will just take time for me to make the changes. So I'm not unhappy as I was because I realize now that this is a learning process. So I go next week to my primary care doctor and will see how my labs are doing. I'm not thinking my HGBAC1 will be any better than it was the last time I went. I haven't been excersising as much as I should and we did just go through Halloween and Thanksgiving. If its under 6.5 I will be happy. It was 5.8 last time, but my med was cut in half. So if its under 6.5 I will be happy. Well we will see what the say tomorrow at the doctor. I know I can do this it will just take time.

Well I have finally got over the need to weight everyday. I guess I realize that I'm not going to lose very fast and weighting everyday just depressed me. I going next week to the doctor so will see how I'm doing then. I don't know if I want another fill or not. I do have trouble eating chicken, beef, and pork, it seem to want to set and spin in my stomach. I don't know if I'm not chewing well enough or if I'm eating to big a bites. I still don't do well in the am, I usually don't eat anything till lunch. I do protien shakes in the morning. Evening is still my biggest problem time of the day. I could eat a bear most of the time. My portions size is still way to big. Thats the one thing that makes me think I need another fill. I will have to talk with them next week and see what they think. Oh well need to get some things done today, Christmas is going to sneak up on me if I don't get busy.

Crabcake, everything you said you have been me talking. I struggle with sugar everyday. I guess I really need to find a way to give it up, but addictions are so hard to fight. I have finally gotten over my need to weight everyday. I found weighting everyday only depressed me when it wasn't the numbers I wanted to see. I go next week for another fill, but not sure I want on right now. My portion size is still to big, but I do have trouble eating meat. As for excerise I guess I'm just lazy. I can find so many other things to do. But as always tomorrow is a new day. So we can't beat ourself up over the small things as long as we do let the small things get of control. Thanks for listening to me ramble on.

Well I have finally got over the need to weight everyday. I guess I realize that I'm not going to lose very fast and weighting everyday just depressed me. I going next week to the doctor so will see how I'm doing then. I don't know if I want another fill or not. I do have trouble eating chicken, beef, and pork, it seem to want to set and spin in my stomach. I don't know if I'm not chewing well enough or if I'm eating to big a bites. I still don't do well in the am, I usually don't eat anything till lunch. I do protien shakes in the morning. Evening is still my biggest problem time of the day. I could eat a bear most of the time. My portions size is still way to big. Thats the one thing that makes me think I need another fill. I will have to talk with them next week and see what they think. Oh well need to get some things done today, Christmas is going to sneak up on me if I don't get busy.

Well guys I didn't gain anything over Thanksgiving and I'm really proud of that concerning that I did eat some pie. I go next week for another fill, but not sure I need one. I do have trouble eating protien(chicken, turkey, roast beef). It really doesn't want to go down very good, of course all the bad stuff ( pie, cookies, chips and anything else I shouldn't eat) goes now like a dream. I still can eat to much at mealtime anywhere from 1 to 1 1/2 cups at a time. I do stay full for 3 to 4 hours. I have to watch for the head hunger thing or I will find myself eating when I'm not hunger. I still can't eat bread, so that not a problem. I just not losing which is my problem as I don't excersise enough and eat all the easy stuff way to much. I have to force myself to drink water. I would rather drink crystal light peach tea. Oh well, I'm just rattle on here. I just can't decide if I want another fill or not, I'm at 3.7 cc in my 4cc band. Guess I will just have to go talk to them and see what they think.

Thank the Lord the holiday is over, and also my husband is back to work( he took last week off). It was a very quiet thanksgiving this year. I did cook, but ate very little. I didn't eat any turkey on turkey day. After cooking most of the day it wasn't very appealing, I did eat some cheese ball with crackers, a very small piece of pumpkin pie and small pie of dixie pie. I ate 7 layer salad, which was really good. I haven't gain over the holiday witch is a mircle in itself. So now I have to get down to business and try to lose some weight. I haven't lost anything in months, but really want to lose about 10 to 20 lbs before the end of January when we go on vacation. I'm tired of lugging around all this weight. I really tired of my clothes not fitting. The clothes thing is really getting to me. I have not changed sizes at all . You would think with losing 30 lbs something would of changed. All my clothes feel funny, like the don't go over my hips very good, but still they hang now between my legs. I just hate having to pull them up all the time. When I sit the crotch seems way to far down and I have to adjust the way I'm sitting or get up and pull them up. The front of my pant is way to big where my stomach so fit, but the butt is still to big. My body is just so weird. All of a sudden I have rolls on my legs that never were there before. I guess menopause has something to do with it. My skin is so dry now. This getting old is not what its cracked up to be. Well guess I will drink some more water and then eat some salad. The holiday will be a real test for this band. I guess I should just be glad that I'm not gaining any weight. I should name the band, but can't come up with the correct name. I know that a name will come to me sometime soon. Oh will things will be what they are suppose to be. I just have to have faith that all will happen in the correct time. I'm going to send all the sweet stuff out of the house, I can't handle sweet thing being in the house. I LOVE SWEETS. I MUST NOT HAVE THEM IN THE HOUSE. I MUST BE STRONG. I WILL HAVE A GOOD DAY AND A GOOD WEEK. I WILL LOSE SOMETHING THIS WEEK. I WILL TRY TO WALK MORE. I WILL NOT FEEL SORRY FOR MYSELF. I WILL TRY TO MAKE MORE EFFORT IN ALL MY RELATIONSHIPS. I WILL LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES. I WILL EAT MORE PROTIEN. I WILL DRINK MORE WATER. I still haven't had a coke since the day before surgery. I miss my diet coke, sometime I really crave it. If I can give up diet coke, then I should be able to give up sweets. Thank the Lord for this day and let me be thankful for all that the Lord has provided for me.

Thank the Lord the holiday is over, and also my husband is back to work( he took last week off). It was a very quiet thanksgiving this year. I did cook, but ate very little. I didn't eat any turkey on turkey day. After cooking most of the day it wasn't very appealing, I did eat some cheese ball with crackers, a very small piece of pumpkin pie and small pie of dixie pie. I ate 7 layer salad, which was really good. I haven't gain over the holiday witch is a mircle in itself. So now I have to get down to business and try to lose some weight. I haven't lost anything in months, but really want to lose about 10 to 20 lbs before the end of January when we go on vacation. I'm tired of lugging around all this weight. I really tired of my clothes not fitting. The clothes thing is really getting to me. I have not changed sizes at all . You would think with losing 30 lbs something would of changed. All my clothes feel funny, like the don't go over my hips very good, but still they hang now between my legs. I just hate having to pull them up all the time. When I sit the crotch seems way to far down and I have to adjust the way I'm sitting or get up and pull them up. The front of my pant is way to big where my stomach so fit, but the butt is still to big. My body is just so weird. All of a sudden I have rolls on my legs that never were there before. I guess menopause has something to do with it. My skin is so dry now. This getting old is not what its cracked up to be. Well guess I will drink some more water and then eat some salad. The holiday will be a real test for this band. I guess I should just be glad that I'm not gaining any weight. I should name the band, but can't come up with the correct name. I know that a name will come to me sometime soon. Oh will things will be what they are suppose to be. I just have to have faith that all will happen in the correct time. I'm going to send all the sweet stuff out of the house, I can't handle sweet thing being in the house. I LOVE SWEETS. I MUST NOT HAVE THEM IN THE HOUSE. I MUST BE STRONG. I WILL HAVE A GOOD DAY AND A GOOD WEEK. I WILL LOSE SOMETHING THIS WEEK. I WILL TRY TO WALK MORE. I WILL NOT FEEL SORRY FOR MYSELF. I WILL TRY TO MAKE MORE EFFORT IN ALL MY RELATIONSHIPS. I WILL LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES. I WILL EAT MORE PROTIEN. I WILL DRINK MORE WATER. I still haven't had a coke since the day before surgery. I miss my diet coke, sometime I really crave it. If I can give up diet coke, then I should be able to give up sweets. Thank the Lord for this day and let me be thankful for all that the Lord has provided for me.

I don't know why I'm afraid of things, but I am. I guess part of it is I'm afraid of change. Eating in comfortable its what I am. If I don't eat what will I do. I am afraid to talk to people so I just don't talk. People think I'm unfriendly, but I'm not. I just don't know how to talk to people. I'm always afraid that they won't like me. I am afraid to ask the hard questions, because I might have to make a change in my life. What am I afraid of? I don't like what I have became and I don't like hiding behind this wall of fat. So what am I afraid of. Change can't be as bad as my life is right now. How could it get any worst. I am afraid if I don't get the answers I want then I will have to make major changes in my life. I don't know if I have the courage to do that. I am afraid of losing my best friend and I have been this way for so long that I don't know any other way. Why am I always afraid of what others will think of me. When did I became this way? What made me this way? Why am I so afraid of life?

I don't know why I'm afraid of things, but I am. I guess part of it is I'm afraid of change. Eating in comfortable its what I am. If I don't eat what will I do. I am afraid to talk to people so I just don't talk. People think I'm unfriendly, but I'm not. I just don't know how to talk to people. I'm always afraid that they won't like me. I am afraid to ask the hard questions, because I might have to make a change in my life. What am I afraid of? I don't like what I have became and I don't like hiding behind this wall of fat. So what am I afraid of. Change can't be as bad as my life is right now. How could it get any worst. I am afraid if I don't get the answers I want then I will have to make major changes in my life. I don't know if I have the courage to do that. I am afraid of losing my best friend and I have been this way for so long that I don't know any other way. Why am I always afraid of what others will think of me. When did I became this way? What made me this way? Why am I so afraid of life?

Can you do some of the chair excerises. They have video out with them. It might help and keep the weight off your knee.

I guess it really doesn't matter. I personally find it very interesting how different we all, as to where we find our sweet spot. Maybe its not important to anyone else, but I'm glad we are able to share with others.

Still not doing so good, but I'm hanging in there. I make no excuses for my behavior. I know I'm doing this to myself, so I ask for no sympathy, but I do ask for understanding. I know this is not an easy path and if anyone thinks it its then they need a reality check. This is the hardest thing I have ever done. I'm an emotional eater, which is make everything harder. Lots of thing play into my overeating, things that I must workout for myself. Some are childhood, marriage, and children issues. I'm trying to do better and some day are good and other are a bitch. I would like better restriction, but then I think maybe my restriction is good if I would work the program like I should. I still have problems with chicken and bread. I really miss bread, I didn't think I would because I was never a great big bread eater, but I would love to be able to eat a sandwich for lunch with some soup. I need to eat more salads. I have trouble first thing in the morning so I usually have a protien shake. I have found that if I eat cereal that cereal doesn't hold me nearly as well as the protien shake does. I have to keep busy or I do want to eat just because. The head hunger thing is really hard to control at times, but I try to keep busy that really helps. I know other people are doing so good and some day that will be me too. I will hang in and it will come just slower than most.

Still not doing so good, but I'm hanging in there. I make no excuses for my behavior. I know I'm doing this to myself, so I ask for no sympathy, but I do ask for understanding. I know this is not an easy path and if anyone thinks it its then they need a reality check. This is the hardest thing I have ever done. I'm an emotional eater, which is make everything harder. Lots of thing play into my overeating, things that I must workout for myself. Some are childhood, marriage, and children issues. I'm trying to do better and some day are good and other are a bitch. I would like better restriction, but then I think maybe my restriction is good if I would work the program like I should. I still have problems with chicken and bread. I really miss bread, I didn't think I would because I was never a great big bread eater, but I would love to be able to eat a sandwich for lunch with some soup. I need to eat more salads. I have trouble first thing in the morning so I usually have a protien shake. I have found that if I eat cereal that cereal doesn't hold me nearly as well as the protien shake does. I have to keep busy or I do want to eat just because. The head hunger thing is really hard to control at times, but I try to keep busy that really helps. I know other people are doing so good and some day that will be me too. I will hang in and it will come just slower than most.

Please don't feel alone, I'm in the same boat. I have lost around 30 lbs, but have gain some this past week. Like you I know I'm not making the greats choices at times, but I'm eating so much less. I really need to kick up the exercise and maybe that would help. I also need to find a exercise partner that would make me more accountable. I really understand and I wish I had some magic word, but I don't. I'm also at 3.7 cc in my 4cc band. I really don't have a lot of restriction. I still looking for the sweet spot. I would love to be able to eat only 1/2 cup as other people talk about. I know we can do this, it is hard no doulbt about it. I know that I didn't get this way overnight so I just have to quite the noisy in my head and try hard to do this. Please don't give up it will happen.

I'm not doing so good. I'm not following the diet at all. I know what I should be doing, but I just can't seem to get with the program. My weight is up at this time. I need to slow down and rethink what I'm doing. I do want to lose. I do want to feel better. I know that this last week I've not felt very good. I know it is because I'm not doing what I should be doing. I will try to do better tomorrow. I just have to do this. This is the hardest part of the year with the holiday and all. I have to keep busy and not let thing get to me. I will do this.

Guess the old saying "you can't teach an old dog a new trick" is true. I'm still the same weight I was a week ago. I guess I will never learn how to eat, or how to make the right choices. I feel like a complete failure. I just don't seem to be able to do this. I guess I will have to be happy with what I have lost and be happy never gaining it back. I really wanted to lose a little more so that I could get into a smaller size before we go on vacation in January. I just don't see that happening right now. I don't know rather I should get another fill or just wait awhile. I'm really tired of thinking about it. I just want to lose weight. Maybe if I quite worrying about it the weight will come off. I know it won't, but I get so discouraged when I see people posting about only eating 1000 calorires or less a day and still not losing weight. I just don't feel that is a healthy diet. I guess maybe I will find out how much it cost to joing the Y. Maybe I could go there this winter and walk on the track. I need to do something for excersise. My sister is so thin and I'm so jealous. I want to be a size 12 or even 14. My sister is down to a size 6, I don't think I would ever look good at that size. I just don't see myself as thin. I don't believe it will every happen. Proof is that I can't seem to lose even 50 lbs with the band. I hope this wasn't a mistake. It cost a lot of money and I just don't seem to lose. I really feel like a loser.

Guess the old saying "you can't teach an old dog a new trick" is true. I'm still the same weight I was a week ago. I guess I will never learn how to eat, or how to make the right choices. I feel like a complete failure. I just don't seem to be able to do this. I guess I will have to be happy with what I have lost and be happy never gaining it back. I really wanted to lose a little more so that I could get into a smaller size before we go on vacation in January. I just don't see that happening right now. I don't know rather I should get another fill or just wait awhile. I'm really tired of thinking about it. I just want to lose weight. Maybe if I quite worrying about it the weight will come off. I know it won't, but I get so discouraged when I see people posting about only eating 1000 calorires or less a day and still not losing weight. I just don't feel that is a healthy diet. I guess maybe I will find out how much it cost to joing the Y. Maybe I could go there this winter and walk on the track. I need to do something for excersise. My sister is so thin and I'm so jealous. I want to be a size 12 or even 14. My sister is down to a size 6, I don't think I would ever look good at that size. I just don't see myself as thin. I don't believe it will every happen. Proof is that I can't seem to lose even 50 lbs with the band. I hope this wasn't a mistake. It cost a lot of money and I just don't seem to lose. I really feel like a loser.