lelaseattle

It's a rainy nasty day here in Seattle and I'm marking 2 years since my closest friend passed from colon cancer at age 46. I'm feeling sad today, and when I went to Sbux this morning to get my chai misto, I almost caved and got a full regular chair tea latte - but I didn't do it. I so want to fill myself with food today to fill my sadness up, I just need to keep reminding myself that it's not the answer today! I've realized that I haven't been drinking enough water this week really at all, and that's probably why I'm sitting at a plateau so far this week. It's encouraging to have that big drop at the beginning when you're detoxing all of the sodium and crap out of your system, and now I need to stay the course and keep my focus. Thanks for your post Amy, I need to remember that I'm successful! I laugh at the irony of working in a video game studio with a ton of skinny young nerdy boys that can eat anything and never gain weight! Everyday there are home-baked cookies or Danish, or donuts on Friday. I keep telling myself that I ate a lot of donuts and danishes and cookies to get where I'm at - I certainly haven't been deprived of that! The other thing I'm trying to do is not "advertise" that I'm back on my band program. I've told maybe 2-3 people, but I'm not saying anything on facebook or announcing it to everyone I eat with. I think there's some reverse psychology there and I'm going to try it. One meal at a time - that's my motto this week! My mantra is "you're worthy"! Big hugs everyone - sending you all positive healthy vibes today! Lela

katspaw - welcome! I was banded 3 years ago and I've yet to lose that big drop of weight. I've hit a 50 lb loss, but then life got in the way and I didn't take care of myself first. It's a process and it always will be! I came here to this site and this thread was my first post/forum too last week because I am in the exact same boat as you. I was looking for a place of support and advice during lunch one day. I'm a complete food addict. I will be until the day I die. I'm in my mid-forties now and the one thing I've committed to is to get up every morning and doing the best I can with each day. I'm so tired of feeling the shame of my addiction! I would love to hear what you do to push through a tough time in life - that's where I'm at. I've used food to crutch myself through good and bad times, but as I age, more friends get diagnosed with cancer, family members pass, pets pass. I have such a hard time not wanting to console myself with food through those times. Wishing you all the best this week!

Thanks Amy! My band won't allow me to eat rice or peppers, otherwise I'd be all over that stuffed pepper recipe - yum! I'll definitely try the chicken w/Dijon though. I completely forgot about bandster cookbooks; I'll have to do some more research tonight to see if there's any on Amazon I can download into my Kindle. I'm a horrible chef, I don't really like cooking and I'm not very good at it, so I tend to rely on grocery deli's and such for dinners. Not a good combo for eating well, I know . I bought a nice filet mignon from the grocer the other day, and I tried to follow a basic recipe but it didn't turn out as well as when I've bbq'd before. I've been eyeing ground turkey lately, just need to find a way to make it tasty with some spices. I figure if I can at least find 3-4 basic recipes around fish, chicken, turkey & beef - that'll help me when I'm craving something fried which is all too easy when I'm working late!

Hi everyone, Well, new week, new opportunities to keep pushing to become better. I wake up every day grateful to put my feet on the floor, and yet hopeful that I can make good choices with my food! I slipped a bit Saturday night. Combination of some anxiety, boredom, and knowledge that I didn't throw out a small bowl of chocolate that was hidden in a cupboard. Such an addict mentality lol. But, I got up yesterday morning, hung out a local Starbucks, and stayed strong staying away from everything involving sugar and starch! Not easy! I am feeling good that my jeans don't feel like sausage casing on my thighs - I just didn't want to go and buy a size up in jeans. I fought so hard to get into an 18 (albeit Lane Bryant's version of an 18). Guess that's my impetus...measurement...motivation - whatever you want to call it. I've been drinking iced green tea (unsweetened) all day, and I find myself craving cucumbers and salmon; which is good. That's where I want to be. I admit I'm getting tired of the protein shakes for breakfast and lunch routine. I have such a hard time being consistent with those, even though I know it'll help me. What I really need are some ideas for easy dinners for one? I've been buying a piece of fish or a piece of steak, cooking it and then eating some steamed veggies with it. What are some things you all make for dinner that are delicious and low-sodium, low-carb? I really have to watch sodium intake at the end of the day; gotta love being in your mid-forties! Also, I see some of you talk about a "5 day pouch test"; what is that? Hope everyone's made it through a great Monday! Lela

Hi everyone - I'm happy to say that I woke up Monday morning of this week, weighed myself and then committed to my form of detoxing - only protein shakes for breakfast & lunch, and a band-friendly 1/2 cup total portion of a healthy dinner until I've lost 10 pounds. So far I've stuck with it and I'm down 8.8 pounds. I already notice a much more alert mind, looser jeans, craving-free self. It feels so good to be treating my body and band the way it deserves. Now I just need to wake up each morning and do the best I can each day. Sugar has such a direct affect to me - I swear that when I was banded 3 years ago, my entire body chemistry changed because of the way I cut sugar and bread/starches out. Now, whenever I have too much of those in my body, it's a direct affect and I gain weight overnight. It's kind of nice actually that I know exactly what I need to do for my body to react positively. Sometimes that's half the battle! Thanks for the support and for sharing your stories - it's helped me greatly and has inspired me to know that I'm not alone. That it's a PROCESS!

Hi Hilary - Thank you so much for your supportive reply! That's so sweet of you. I did go and get my band filled back at the beginning of September last year, but I didn't get it as tight as before. I really want to WANT to re-commit (if that makes any sense), and I know that I'll feel so so much better once I do. You know that sense of relief when you get past 3-4 days of detoxing and your body doesn't crave that chai tea latte from Sbux every morning, and you don't need the small bit of SunChips to start a meal out with to help loosen the band? I know that I can do it. I just feel so unmotivated to take that first step dangit!

I just joined this page today, and immediately looked for this same topic, so thank you for having the courage to talk about "starting over". It's tough! I was banded 3 years ago and over the past year I've gained 25 pounds back. In 2011 I lost a best friend to colon cancer, one of my dear cats to kidney failure, an aunt to lymphoma, the loss of a relationship, and the diagnosis of my other cat's kidney failure. Needless to say, I turned to sugar and carbs for comfort. I gained some weight but my grief also kept me from eating properly for the first time in my life that I can remember! Usually I eat everything in site through grief/stress. I did ok through the beginning of 2012, but I wasn't losing, wasn't on plan, wasn't doing right by my band. Last July I had to have my band completely unfilled because I got the stomach flu. Twice! So yes, I took that opportunity to eat sushi rolls and some pizza and donuts, vowing that I'd get right back on program after 1 month. Well, I've been doing hospice care for my other cat for almost 16 months now, and the stress of that plus moving my parents out of their home of 37 years (which took 3.5 months to do!), and I am still not eating on plan. I did lost 10 pounds back in November, but that was 5 months ago and I gained it back plus 10 more. I keep saying I'm going to get back on track, but I feel so stuck. I hate how my body feels. My clothes are tight and I do not want to buy a bigger size of jeans! I'm ashamed, disappointed in myself, and feel like a huge failure. I ask a buddy of mine that was banded 10 years ago for help, but she's got her hands full with a toddler and I know in my gut that it's really up to me. I have to do the work, no one else. I just can't seem to get myself to commit. I feel lost. I need to dig deep and remember all of the reasons that I wanted to be banded to begin with!

I take 5000mcg too. I get the capsules, open them up, and dissolve them into some sugar-free popsicles in a bowl or if you're able - sugar free puddings. I too am afraid of getting something stuck. I suffered hair loss at 3 months post-op, and wow I couldn't believe how much was coming out. I hated washing my hair it was so depressing. I find now that my hair is really sensitive to protein fluctuations. If I go through a lot of stress and don't eat much protein, I'll see the hair loss a few months later. Interesting how our bodies have adjusted so much!