lunasa

(((((TRACY))))) We're in the same boat....My DH has no libido. It sucks...I thought it was suppose to be the other way around!! And I agree I think it's a psychological thing with them. I believe his home life led to him blanking out his urges. there was no sex inhis house. I don't know how him & his sister came to be,,,unless they were found under a head of cabbage.

Sorry Terri I was posting as you were... And sex...Eh....YES PLEASE !!! Me Toooooo!!!:heh:

Hello all..xx Sara Mos...don't be ashamed you are back on the cigarettes!! You got a band not a sainthood!! LOL ( easily know I'm a smoker too!) This reminds me of something...let me share. While my weight was creeping back up the scale the last time I was beside myself with frustration. In my innocence i decided to wage an unholy war on myself & sign up to a programme that combined a diet & excercise regime. I am not a fan of excercise as I have melted into my brains association with being overweight. AND I hate to feel myself wobble on the threadmill.. Anyway, I arrive at the gym and am assigned my trainer who was kinda of on a no winner with me anyway as I really (in hindsight) did not want to be there. To add to his loosing streak he was a STAUNCH anti-smoker & on reviewing my file decided to lecture me about how they were going to kill me etc... Ya I know, I know I said and that's a whole other show I said, I am here to loose this weight and quitting smoking is not part of the plan...this said through gritted teeth in my continuing frustration with the thought of being on cardio machines for the next hour! Well, as he rabbitted on at me I began to get very angry & finally let him have it with.. "well I'd rather die from smoking than die of fatness!!! At least nobody will collapse under the weight of the coffin!!" Needless to say the hour did not transpire & my self and the pure & clean Mr Muscle ended our short relationship there & then with me forfeiting my payment & me leaving very angry & upset & hating him & his vegan mentality. Now I secretly knew it was more than just him that bothered me..It was the fact that I was in ANOTHER programme AGAIN feeling my ass wobble around me AGAIN...after having lost that ass AGAIN only to let it back into my life AGAIN...I was at my wits end AGAIN. But my outburst wouldn't leave me..I couldn't stop it ringing in my ears, what I had said in my anger & frustration, it was actually true! I wasn't concerned with the fact that cigarettes were slowly killing me, I was more concerned that I was unpleasing to the eye & that was the ultimate issue. How vain am I? There I was choosing to poison my insides but was selective in how I went about it! I wasn't bothered about my insides, I just wanted to look good on the outside. My reasoning being that sure smoking is bad for me, it'll make me old before my time, my mouth will shrivel & I'll prob get a horrible disease BUT gradually...not now. I am fat right now & that bothers me! I began to question my motivation...why am I wanting to loose weight anyway? I had filled out that form ticking off "to be Healthy" as a reason & now here I am in all honesty not really concerned with being healthy as I have no intention of giving up the smokes & if that really was the motivation, would that not have been just as urgent? No I just wanted to look good so I could feel good. BUT when I weighed 148 lbs...I didn't feel good either. I just clung in there for dear life, because I didn't answer the ultimate question. WHAT DO I WANT? SPECIFICALLY? No I wanted to loose weight because I hated being fat. That's negative motivation..it was strong alright, but only as strong as my self hatred & that just was not enough. I had to get rid of the anger & so I realised that I would never achieve anything if all I had to depend on was anger. Einstein once said that 95% of any probelm lies in asking the right question. What does that mean for us? Well it means we may not know what we are doing. We may just be (excuse the expression) pissing in the wind. Think about this..I have no doubts that I can loose weight...I am the best & most successful dieter I know...NOBODY i know has achieved what I have..You are all prob the best dieters you know too! Who else do you know who has lost as much weight as you have in your lifetime? The problem is not one of willpower, but the fact that we are all just stuck in our patterns like robots that have been programmed to know no others way of functioning! By the sounds of things some of you are the only ones in your offices to walk past the doughnuts & buffets of shit, or cooking healthy meals at home, or campaigning for healthy choices from vending machines. Who else do you know who committs them selves as much as you all do? Who go online to check nutritional information? Willpower can only do so much and yet we float around confusing ourselves by finding ourselves in the local drive thru's, ice cream parlours, sitting over cheesecake , smoking & drinking and doing all the things we though we had established as the enemy and turned our back on!!! Cheesecake is prob not the problem, your will is not weak either. Your will can onky work so hard when it is not informed as to what it is it's working for. So ask yourself what IS IT you want, be specific. Running away from fatness only trains your perspective to remain in that state of mind & you will become so magnetised to it, it will enevitably become your only outcome. It will become your life... Don't blame your will, but challenge yourself to find questions, get to the bottom of your motivation to find out if it is running on fear.

P.S. how do I pimp up my Shrink'n Violets under my avatar to look like SHRINK'N VIOLETS ?

Sorry to hear of your trouble Ihomeschool... For the moment I wouldn't concern my self with excercise in your condition. Give yourself the credit due that you're doin what you're doing is enough & when you feel good & ready then do you excercise. Someday you'll wake up & know you're ready to stick you head outside the door & walk...if that is what you choose to do. What does the doctor say about that?

<TABLE class=tborder cellSpacing=1 cellPadding=8 width="100%" align=center border=0><TBODY><TR title="Post 458355" vAlign=top><TD class=alt1 align=middle width=125>GonnaBfree</TD><TD class=alt2>Eating in the car is a thing of my past. That was one of my worst habits. For me there's really no reason for it other than eating in privacy so that no one can see how much I really eat. Does anyone else have to loose that part of them? I could really use some help with that struggle.</TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE> Girls...that too was me BLB (I like that kity) I use to eat in my car ALL the time. While I was driving I would eat bags of crisps (potato chips) and fries from Mcdonalds...sometimes I would actally have to make the journey a lil bit longer by going round the block so I could finish the bag & then I would inspect myself for crumbs etc before I'd meet whoever was at journeys end!! I would drive thru Mc Donalds (that's about it as far as drive thru choices go here!!) and get the burgers which I would eat in the car park first. Somedays now I just want to SPLUUUURGE on everything. But I can't so I haven't & it's SOOOOOOO saving me & helping me to have a band restricting these urges. I feel like I'm getting further & further away from those urges. They are not as improtant when I know they cannot materialise. Before I use to be utterly compelled to ACT OUT the food fantasies..I was completely driven & devious in my attempts to seek & find not only food but opportunities & places to eat...It was like panic eating. Then of course it was always in private...my dirty little secret..NOONE KNEW!! So when I would get home, because I had binged unbeknownst to anyone I would proceed to have my usual meals on top of it all....BOTTOMLESS PIT had I!! I couldn't say I was full coz I would be admitting I had eaten already. I don't know how I didn't make myself sick at times. So... I rapidly went up clothes sizes & weight..took up more space in the bed..in my car..In my life..ARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!!! Reminds me of an old joke of the teacher who says to the student... someday kid you're gonna be an astronaut! When the kid says why do you say that? The teacher replies..becuase you're taking up space I was MAD to think I wouldn't pay for it...but hey, it brought me here, to where I am now, sliding gently back down in size & weight. My self worth repairing and finally believing in my finest self again...and of course it led me to the wonderful resource at my fingertips which is LBT & bandland & all you my fellow sufferers who understand, relate & gather here togther empowering our selves & one another. How could I not be grateful now, that at the end of a long & winding dark road that I can see my light & am drawn to it with you my friends!! Only Six weeks ago I would not have thought my mood would start to lift so wonderfully & so quickly..and that I would be so conscious of it... Ramble I do...but I love the loving thoughts! A true friend is someone who sees right through you & still enjoys the view!!

HELLO EVERYBODY & HAPPY MAYDAY Today is officially the first day of summer!!! :clap2: I hope everybody is doing well still...xx I have decided that my new drink of choice will be a glass of Guinness. Only occurred to me after branding my DH as a Guinness langer!! LOL Anyway... CHICA CHULA...you mentioned you feel phlegmy(spelling?) after milk etc... Milk does cause mucous...check out that you're not lactose intolerant. :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug: :girl_hug:

LOL girls...thank you for the suggestions:cocktail:...cheers!! BUT WHISKEY!!! OMG I think that'd be another loopy juice for me..I'll have to come up with somethin...Mojito's are good..hmm Don't think I'd find them in the local!! I'll let you all know.. I don't plan on drinking now again until late May, I have a wedding to go to. Laura thanks for the link..I'll check it out...by the way I meant to say this ages ago when you first posted your photo...you're such a cutie...gorgeous woman! BTW...a "langer" is a slang term that means more than one thing but in my context it means a "lush" or basically someone mad for drink!! But I'm not really a langer...I just have the sociable few!! My DH is a Guinness langer though! Drinking is SUCH a big part of life where I live...it is how we celebrate, commiserate, welcome & congratulate...pass time, spend time and anything else you can think of !! my mousepad is driving me nuts

BRENNERS...hope you read this!! Congratulations on getting your band fitted...happy it worked out for you. Re the gas pains you are experiencing the same as me. I felt like I was having a heart attack & onky for LBT I would have been freaking out. I had actually stocked up on the GAS x strips on a recent trip to the US but girl...I may as well have been eating toothpaste. I didn't get my pains until 4 days in & I'm sorry to say they lasted a solid week. Getting less prolonged though as the week passed. I can recommend good oul ANDREWS liver salts and if you can get your hands on some liquid or effervecent painkillers too just keep dosing your self with them. I found relief by lying on my side, the side that hurt and that was the best thing. I didn't have any prob sleeping with it. But unlike yourself I sometimes found that eating (soup or shake) actually helped too. I also did the hot water bottle but that didn't really do much. I hope you read this & can at least take comfort that while you may have the pain & discomfort for a while it WILL go away. It's SOOO bad sometimes I found myself groaning out loud. Sitting in the same position as TRACYINKs pointed out is definatley not good for it. I also found bending to tie shoes or bending at all for that matter triggered it in the mornings!! I hope you get through it without loosing your mind a bit! Tracyinks I did the arms over my head thing too...I didn't care who saw me it was all I could do to not cry at times! P.S....check out my ticker!!!! I am 2.5lbs away from my first weight loss goal of 24 lbs... I'm so grateful! :clap2: :clap2: :clap2: I have bought myself a james avery bracelet & my first charm is a key of promise...that I promise myself to see this through. BTW...anyone got any advice on drinking alcohol? I had my first night out last night & drank Gin & cranberry juice (couldn't think of anything else not fizzy!) anyway I had 5 drinks in the course of 5 1/2 hours and I am still paranoid as to whether this will STRETCH the pouch?? Anyone? And can anyone suggest a mild alcoholic drink that is not fizzy & is low in calories.. the cranberry juice itself is worse than the gin I think. Gin is yuk anyway...I just realise that now LOL.. Oh and wine is my LOONEY JUICE so that WON'T be happening. I tend to fancy divorce when I get tanked on that. DH does NOT like to see me on the looney juice & neither do I. I prob sound like a total langer, but It's just that my circle is very social & drinking is something I also need to have a plan for. THANK YOU!!! (hic)

Hi Sara...we were posting at the same time!! I know what you mean when you say you're sad with the slowdown in weight loss. that has always been a make or break point for me with dieting..I love the big kick start you get initially but hate when it slows down or stops! Going on to the mushies is scary for me...I have one week before that happens but I think I'll have realised my first weight loss goal by then. I weigh in tomorrow & that'll tell. At least if I have reached that goal I will be at another mental stage & will feel more confident about upping the calorie intake. Scares me though!!! I'm sure I'll be fine if I get a good list of foods I can have compiled during this next week so as to have a plan & plenty of good choices lined up. I don't want to end up doing mash potatoe & gravy for some reason...I feel it will tease me or something. thank God we're coming into the summer season though as I will be more inclined to pick "lighter" foods such as cottage cheese etc. In the winter I would defo be mash & gravy all the way. Keep it up girl....you are doing great...how's the smoking or should I say the no smoking going? That's a major thing to take on right now!!

Hello everybody... wow every time I get to sign on there's sooo much reading & catching up to do!! This thread flies along!! I have no computer at home so I only get to the office one every few days. I'll be moving house in the summer so I'll get one then. Anyhoo....Coming to the end of April!!!! Wow!!! On a personal note... MsJEN...Your post a few pages back was radiating excitment!! Well done, you sound so happy & energised...I am feeling that way too... It's like I've turned a corner & am leaving all the negativity behind. In 3 short weeks I have changed so much!!! My attitude is different, more positive, I am more confident, happy & I feel great & excited for the future.. AMAZING Just last Paddy's Day I was ready for the looney bin over my weight...I was SOOO hopeless & depressed. TRACYinKS!!!! Well done!!! WELCOME BACK!!! You Crazy girl getting pics of your band!!! Who would have thought of that!! LOL...I sure as feck didn't!! Great stuff...hope you're mending to your finest self xx KITY...Me Irish !!! I'm in Co Clare, on the river Shannon in the mid west of Ireland...never been to OZ..it's too far away to contemplate as I hate long flights but it is a wish I intend to realise someday when I have enough money to take my time getting there..Island hopping all the way in smaller doses of flight...and someday I will !! I also want to visit California...BIG TIME...I've only been to the east coast of USA. P.S concerning your grandmothers ring...that's so great..I too had grown out of my engagement & wedding rings & was so upset but now they are back on with room to spare.....so happy!! KAT....I'm so sorry you're going through pain with DH at the moment... You have my best wishes & you are in my thoughts. You have been such an important figure in all our journies so far..xxx Mdrai...I think the pre op stage is the hardest so far...coz you are totally relying on will & WANT the farewell to food!! stay strong & remember the kick start you will get from following the plan...it will be worth it. I am almost 2 weeks post op & have been cooking like I never have before.. I am still on liquids but I am really enjoying myself in the kitchen because I am taking the time to create new healthy dishes. I always wanted to be better in the kitchen but never got anything new done coz I would just eat while I was in there & then run out of steam & rush everything & throw it together so I could eat again!! LOL...DH has lost 7 lbs as a result of being better nourished!! Great or what? He's a high fat cook...I am doing really well with lower fat recipies that are also very tasty..so I could have a bit of competition on my hands. I 'd love for him to loose with me as we both need it. I also look forward to the boudoir rewards it'll inevitably entail!!! I'm so sneaky!! getting my way through good food! why not!? TEACHLADY...well done on further weight loss!!! I too started my charm bracelet..I couldn't decide what stages to reward myself so I broke it into 10% stages...bigger goals & eventually will only give me 5 charms but I have other non weight related goals to fill up the gaps in betwen so I'll have LOADS to collect!! Everyone else....HELLOO!!!! Congratulations...and Good Luck.. I am such a happier person & I know I'm not alone in that...we all have so much to look forward to for ourselves & having you all to chat with has made my experience all the more special... LOVE TO YOU ALL ...BEAUTIFUL SHRINKING VIOLETS XXX :kiss2: :kiss2: :kiss2: :clap2: :clap2: :clap2: :kiss2: :kiss2: :kiss2: :D

Mdrai that is so funny...bandlands This morning I was making coffee & i though Tracy is on her way now & tried to imagine what she's doing right now...is she getting prepped or on the table or what...I thought that was so strange...Someone I've never even MET & I'm waking round my kitchen thinking about her!! Anyway QUESTION PLEASE.... What's the story with "stretching your pouch?" Does that happen & how... I am having trouble remembering to SLOW DOWN drinking my shakes etc ...And when I remember I find it hard to do...although I have managed but sometimes I just go too fast & I wonder am I'm stretching something? Got my first "Are you loosing weight?" comment yesterday...Thank You!! Also my first NSV...my wedding & engagement rings are back on my finger!!! That was depressing growing out of them!!! LauraJ...I hope you don't have to suffer with that pain any longer. Jennifur...good luck with the job Sara Mos...you jet setter!! I'm grand so far...enjoying my vacation from food although cooking more than ever as I find it very relaxing

LMAO Terridoodle!!! very good.. LAURAJ.... you poor thing! You must be demented at this stage!! I had the pain all day yesterday but it suddendly moved into my shoulder last night & was very sore. I did the painkillers & hot water bottle & it settled and now this morning I am fine so far!! I am sitting at my desk with no problems so far...although I have a massive protruding belly...ANYONE ELSE? Is this swelling or what? Anyway LAURAJ, I have a book on juicing & was reading through it last night looking for Gas Remedies & found one you might like to try. PURE Veg juice can be hard to take but when freshly juiced at home can be powerful antidotes.. So here's what you do (obviously you'll need a juicer) A generous slice of fennell (this is the ingredient that combats gas) 1 ince slice of lemon (leave the skin on if unwaxed) 2 Golden delicious apples Juice the lot & pour over ice...(I hope it's decent) Try anyway COURTESY OF JASON VALE www.juicemaster.com I haven't tried it because grocery shopping here is still in the dark ages & I've to TRAVEL far & wide to find fennell!! They think I'm trying to say FUNNELL in my local shop (I wish we had grocery shops like you guys do in America!) KITY....well done on passing up the jack in box!!! And congratulations on your other success... Isn't it CRAZY when we observe our selves being PULLED into that behaviour!! It's a mindless moment & we can correct & redirect as you did...but what is it that fights that redirection! Need is a devious thing KAT817.....:clap2: Thank you for sharing your experience, you really are inspiring! I can't imagine what you went through with DH!! Thank God you got a better prognosis than the original...I would have swung for someone Teachlady...I'm so happy to hear you are satisfied on the half cups..My nerves are gone for the mushy stage...I am happy to stay on my fluids for another 2 weeks!! I worry that I'll go into powersteering mouth mode when I get to use a fork again!

:sick :sick Hi all... You should see the state of me typing here! I cannot sit down bc of these horrible gas pains in my side so I have been standing at my computer all day with the keyboard on a high stool so I can type!! LOL LAURAJ....you are not alone with the pain in your side... don't panic it is gas...I'm on day 4 of it now & I'm lucky I am alone in my office otherwise I would have to be out sick... I just can't bear sitting down. I find painkillers help. I can also 'push' into my pain area but I'm not as it's too sensitive. If I hadn't known to expect this I would be in th ER demanding that I was suffering a heart attack...so yes.. it can be that severe!! However...I am getting done what I have to do & with a smile on my face... I just keep imagining how good I'll feel when the pain is gone! As for appetite & being able to drink more I am at that point too. I can take in 200-300mls at a time but going as far as 300 is a bit much...if I do that it's usually because I FORGET to slow down & I'm sorry by the time I've taken in 300... the fullness is not happening as fast as my intake is but I just have to learn to sync the 2. I probably am not getting in enough protein either... I am useles at tracking & recording...mostly because I am scatterbrained at the best of times! I'd say mushie stage will be difficult..I anticipate I will feel initial guilt that I'll feel I'm overeating as I come off such a small intake.. I'll have to prepare for that. Chica Chuls...dynamo & Kity...Thank you for your kind words... TRACYinKS !!!!! YOU'RE ALMOST THERE!!!! WELL DONE.... PLEASE BE GOOD TO YOURSELF POST OP IN CASE YOU NEED MORE TIME...MAKE YOUR PLAN B TO TAKE IT. Although with all the good will you'll have coming your way, you'll probably be up & about after surgery helping the nurses with their rounds!! We'll all be thinking of you.. Feck this standing up working thing...everything's taking me ages!! I'm going for a walk....feck the paperwork!!!:girl_hug:

WARNING....MAJOR LONG POST :faint: (But hey...I've been missing all weekend again!!!) Hello Again BRENNERS...wow that came around fast! Good luck to you...I hope everything goes well for you. Funny I got a head cold before I was up too & it made no difference. I have to admit here , SOMETIMES i feel a bit down about not being able to pig out!! Not eat normally just my binge days!! Why is that? I suppose I'm just getting use to not having it to depend on maybe? Apart from those fleeting moments I feel I'm doing well. I have lost 17 lbs so far since today (i will weigh once weekly on mondays) This is SO FABULOUS!!!! I hhaven't experienced weight loss in SOOO long...:clap2: :clap2: Thougts & musings.... The old me is hanging around in the background haunting me a little bit, I feel a bit anxious about unrealistic goals hanging around... ie I'm worrying that next Monday I'll be dissappointed with my weight loss... this has always been the case for me, I always wanted the weight gone NOW overnight & anytime in the past I would get to week 2-3 and the weight loss would slow down to 1-2-3 lbs in a week I would freak!! These are the demons I have to face now. I am reading an excellent book called THIN FOR LIFE... it's a few years old but it's all about successful maintainers & I'm finding it very helpful as it documents how weight loss 'masters' have kept their weight at bay & the struggles they finally had to overcome to do that. It profiles 'masters' that have lost their weight numerous times only to regain & have had to start over again. This is what happened me, this is why I got the band. The most helpful thing about this book is their stories & their strategies, and one thing they ALL have in common is that they all have a PLAN. they ALL gave up being unrealistically strict, perfectionism and made plans to include & make way for occasion including reasonable allowance treats. And THEY ALL LIVE IN MAINTENENCE MODE once the weight loss is over In otherwords they eat like skinny people do.....give & take. I always had selective observation when it came to the women around me who are in control of their weight. I was so jealous...I HATED them...BUT I chose only to observe them eating sweets or drinking alcohol or going out for an Indian. I chose to never aknowledge them when they took their coffee black or went walking or drank skim milk or counted points or had salad for lunch & a baked potato for dinner. WHY? Because I wanted to BELIEVE that they didn't watch their weight. I wanted to believe I was the unlucky one who had to count EVERYTHING... I wanted to believe there was a world where weight management didn't exsist & that I just happened to be from somewhere else! I WANTED IT TO BE UNFAIR...I Still do I had a friend down for the weekend & I made a lovely dinner for her & my DH, I sat with them & had my Soup & although the old me on my shoulder was there secretly salivating for the crostini I had made...everything was ok.. I even made dessert (a fruit one!) But my friend is slim & works at staying that way EVERY DAY... she has a PLAN... she sticks to it mon-fri and if she can she'll be good at weekends too but if something comes up she'll make room for it & she'll go out & eat & drink but when it's over she's BACK TO PLAN... I NEVER mastered that... I NEVER did moderation. I always set up rules that were unyielding, no allowances and so impossible to adhere to that when I would have the bottle of wine I had not planned on having, into the nachos & dip I would go...then I would proceed to nibble my way through a lapse and on to a relapse the next day by eating crisps (potato chips) Mcdonalds, Bread, fries, Ice cream and all the way to eventual & inevitable bingeing Collapse.. all the while being cheered on by my bold self... rebelling against this world of calorific responsibility. I got something out of my binges...there was a pay off... I searched & searched for this because I found it hard to believe this eating was benefitting me in some way... but it was.. here is my list of payoffs 1. I got to be spontaneous 2. I got to be irresponsible 3. I got to be 'like everyone else' who was ordering bannoffee ( selective observation at play here) 4. I got to moan about how unfair it was that I was fat 5. I got to be lazy & not have to do anything about it because I had failed before 6. I got to be poor me & I got sympathy for my 'struggle' I got recognition for my struggle On further realization being overweight was a result of positive intentions for me...I was benefiting from it. I just had placed too much importance on those benefits...to look at them on paper now seems pathetic.. they seem like such weak goals in life. But they were easier..and hey...I realised them!! I was successful I then made a list of the sacrifices I had made in order to reach & maintain these goals. I won't list all here but to give an example of these sacrifices, I'm sure you can relate 1. Self Esteem, Self Worth 2. Social life 3. Happiness This list is typical & also very personalised. It might be a good excercise for us to do, to journal who really is inside driving us & how we can get to know that person & help that person prioritise & really look at the goals in life. These lists are still being compiled... maybe I shoud start a thread so people can reflect on the reasons why keeping excessive food in our lives benefits us in some ways. Good luck to all who are getting ' done' this week.... As we come to the end of April MAY we finally begin to be our best:clap2: :clap2: :clap2: :clap2:

Hello everybody...I'm BAACK!! I've no computer at home & I didn't want to be seen coming over to the office walking kinda funny to use this one so i couldn't post til now..was having withdrawals from LBT!! Everything went so great for me..the team were terrific! The surgeons were gentlemen & were very gentle with me... I was up & walking after a few hours. The trip home was tiring but showed me how I was as I was able for the journey with no prob other than being tired & only a bit sore. I had a lot of gas then on day 2/3 which is gone for the most part now... Still quite bloated or maybe it's swollen. Not consuming a lot but sipping about 1/2 glass of whatever, milk, protein shake or soup every 2 hours or so. I can't even get through a whole cup of TEA!!! SARA MOS...you know what we're like with the cuppa's this side of the pond!! Every meeting requires the kettle being put on! Amazingly, when I got weighed pre op I had lost 10 LBS on the pre op diet!!! I couldn't believe it!!! I weighed myself when I got home & that had become 14 LBS... A WHOLE STONE!!! I had NOT expected that so I'm delighted about that! Yesterday I felt quite weak & tired so I stayed around the house & kept busy.. I imagine the weakness is bc I'm taking in so little cals. The funny thing is my stomach is GROWLING so much I swear it thinks my throat has been cut!! The hunger pangs are quite severe at times and some even are uncomfortable...anyone else experience that? I don't have an appetite to speak of but I did find myself yesterday having bouts of food fantasy which got me down a bit as I began to worry about fighting these as I improve, but being around the house on my own all day was the reason mostly I'd say!! What is GREAT though is that if I was DIETING now.. yesterday would have been a cave in day for me & would have resulted in a major binge eating all the things I had been fantasizing about FOR SURE!! So the band has already given me confidence to know I won't DIE without letting rip if you know what I mean..I didn't have to go through a compelled binge because I couldn't!! thank you all for the pep talks pre op...I got very nervous, which lasted until they actually brought me to the OR & prep'd me with that lovely stuff they put in the IV to relax you...hello FLOATING ON AIR!!! LOL I was very comfortable then & knew I was on my way. My sister was great to come with me & she stayed in my room too which was fun!

Hi girls...that's me off now...on way to the airport.. Thank you all for your support & I'll check in as soon as I can..xx

hello again.. I found internet access at the hotel so I'm checking in again... there's a lot of nerves here tonight!! I am very anxious anyway. Mainly because of the unresolved fight with DH... the cold I have acquired and worring about the fact that I lied on my application saying i didn't smoke...when I do. OMG I'm such a brat & brazen enough to think I won't be foundout! My sis just told me she had surgery & she had trouble with the throat pipe because of TAR coming up through it!! What have I done?!! I have had surgery before too as a smoker & didn't have that prob but I'm SOO worried now. I'm gonna call the clinic tomorrow & confess to the nurse while I tell them about my cold before I show up... OMG freaking out !!

PS thank you sara!

Hi Everybody... I'm just getting ready to go & wanted to say thanks & good luck to all of us this week... I won't be able to get back on air until at least thursday when I get home (I'm flying to Manchester) Anyway, I caught a cold fri night & I still kinda of have it so don't be surprised if I arrive back early with no band...OMG Also I am spending my "last night" in a hotel as I have had a major fight with DH & I can't be around the house, so I left the house & we haven't even parted well or said goodbye. GREAT good luck you all..xx

My mantra for today... God, Please Help me see myself with love & understanding

Kat...Thank You!! :huggie: :woot: :thanks: I panicked ...I suppose it's natural, as you say with pre op nerves & all!!! I am having small episodes of fretting about never being able to eat again!! Mainly I think it's this strict re-op stage which I am NOT liking...I don't like having NO meals to at least starve for! And thank you for the wonderful insight into the up side of this, the road ahead we can all look forward to!...the other side! I know I'll prob feel desperate at times durig the bandster hell period but I would be terrified to do anything to jeopardise my band...it slipping or erosion or improper healing etc...GOD no! At the moment I am sticking to this thread as I don't want to go surfing & find a disaster story or even one where someone has found this is not working for them!! Even though there are prob lots of great story's too...I don't want any negativity catching my eye & getting into my head! So thank you all here...for putting up with my mini nervous breakdown!! I am flying home tomorrow..I bought a battery operated blender/mug for my day of travelling tomorrow...ah, my heart is in the right place!! Laura.... they won't be looking at you in any other way but professional girl.. thighs, hips, teeth T#ts, (nipple rings) It's all the same to them... And if you feel like doin a bow...then do!!..LOL

Hi Laura.. I second that... cathetar no problem... you will be fine.. don't worry. and how many down there's do you think they see Every day...don't even worry yourself about that! But in saying that I'll be trimming my "garden" so as to be nice & respectable for my inspection!!! LOL

Hello all.. I'm still here...Just not online as much.. I have managed to read up to date & will get more involved with you all when I get home, I don't have the privacy here... SARA MOS >>>> LOVE LOVE the charm idea... I am a cool jewellery freak...THANK YOU!!! Am on last day of Florida visit. Started pre op diet on sat...Sun had easter dinner with family so I started again monday... Not really liking not having meals to look forward to. Am doing the shakes, fruit & veg & water but I've included a salad (just greens) and some hummus to keep me sane...I also had a spoon of LF cottage cheese... For God's sake I'm on a holidays!! :hungry: :hungry: :hungry: :hungry: :hungry: :hungry: :hungry: :hungry: :hungry: :hungry: :hungry: :hungry: :hungry: I know what I'm like & it's totally unrealistic to think I could do shakes alone during my vacay!! I am being good, albeit suiting myself by adding green salads (shoot Me!) Mc Donald's is like a leach on my brain... not enough to give in but it's there...why? I have lost one pound... I would normally gain 7-10 lbs being here (Yes, really!!) Best Ice Cream in the world = Palm Beach Ice Cream Parlour ... So I like to congratulate myself with the neurotic notion that I have SAVED myself from having to loose 11....Puh-lease! Am I right?:nervous :nervous :nervous I haven't touched a drop of alcohol & haven't eaten anything else bad despite my scary episodes of hunger fear!!! What? WHY DO I FEAR HUNGER??!! Apparantly it's a dieter's mentality to FEAR hunger...If we learn to overcome this fear we become empowered. The test is to go deliberatly without food for 8 hours to allow yourself to go in & out of states of hunger & the associations of it.. Now, this was an article in Oprah's O magazine based on a woman called Judith Beck & her diet solution : how to train your brain to think like a thin person.... Makes sense but as usual.. Yeah, easier said than done ...practicing this really showed me how AFRAID of hunger I am... I haven't managed to do it yet!!! I AM SCARED EVERYBODY!!! Will I be able to overcome my food behavioural difficulties ever??? :help: KAT817... As a seasoned bandster..can you re-assure me? What happens in life after banding? HOLY SHEPHARD's PIE!!! I just looked at my ticker ...5 days!! OMG