KarenElaine

[font='lucida sans unicode'][b]2013 March 1[/b]: I expect most of us wonder how we ever came to this point in our lives. How did I get this heavy, or this big, or this out of shape, or this unhealthy? Although we all know it didn't happen over night, we all secretly wish we could twinkle our nose or wake up from this horrible dream and find everything as we imagined and not as it is in reality. [/font]
[font='lucida sans unicode']I was rear-ended in a vehicle accident in 1990. My lower back, neck, and feet got messed up. I've struggled with my weight since. Some good times, mostly bad to disasterous times. I'm easily dragging another person around with me that needs to be tossed. I've done WW 3 times, learned a lot. But I just can't get the weight off without exercise. When I have tried to work out, the pain wasn't good pain at all--it was stabbing, excruciating pain. [/font]
[font='lucida sans unicode']I've been through an army of doctors in the last several months. The cardiologist tells me my heart is "sound", but I'm out of breath. I sleep with a CPAP machine for sleep apnea. I don't get a good nights sleep without that darling and meds every night to prevent migraines. My blood pressure is controlled by medication. A nerve test on my leg tells the Neurologist, my nerves are good, and I guess my muscle response is ok, but my right knee doesn't allow me to lead up a step. My right hip feels like it has a knife in it most of the time. He sent me for X-Rays because I told him I've got to get to the Y to a personal trainer, pronto. I've got to get this weiight off. I've got to do something!!!! X-Rays show arthritis having a grand ol time on me. From the foot to the back, and some sort of "break" in my "T" something! Seriously, a break! That might explain while my back always hurts.[/font]
[font='lucida sans unicode']So on a recent visit with my Primary Care Doc, going over the X-Rays, I told him I really had wanted to get this weight off myself, but I feel like 'm quickly running out of time. Time, I don't have. Then I just asked for a referral for the LapBand. I told him I had been contemplating this for 3 years, I can't wait any longer--I have to get healthy! I've got to get this weight off. [/font]
[font='lucida sans unicode']He really helped me see this in another light. It's a way to a new beginning. Losing weight will help me be able to exercise. [/font]
[font='lucida sans unicode']I received my referral to the Bariatric Surgeons Ofc within a few days. I'm scheduled for my first appointment with them March 28th. I am hoping for a cancellation so I can get in earlier. I'm ready to get this party started! :) [/font]
[font='lucida sans unicode']I've been to an Orthapedic doc, it seems my knee is ok, just a lot of arthritis. He has me taking some serious anti-inflammatory medication. I may go back for some shots. I still need to see an Orthapedic doc for my back to see if I have any limitations there. I'm ready to start my road to recovery--a new me.[/font]

[font='lucida sans unicode']Since getting my referral and finding this site and app I've been picking up on behaviors I will need to modify and things I need to learn and am trying to get a jump on them. Eating a small amount. Chewing thoroughly. Drinking in sips, I'm a serious gulper. I don't like straws. Choosing high protein, low carb items. [/font]

[b][font='comic sans ms']So my story begins...[/font][/b]
[b][font='comic sans ms']2013 March 4: [/font][/b][font='comic sans ms']I've been very careful and conscious of what I'm eating, and how I'm eating it. I have been picking up a lot of tips from all of you verteran bandsters. I'm truly thankful. The weight is already coming off. I already feel so much better just dropping a few pounds. My cardiologist said I would. Emotionaly, I feel better as well. I'm still hoping and praying for that phone call to get me in to my first appointment earlier than my scheduled one.[/font]

[font='comic sans ms'][b]2013 March 15:[/b] So, this is my week...to finally go to my first consultation. It feels like it's been a lifetime just to get to this week! I don't know how many appointments or what appointments I will have to square away before I get scheduled for surgery (other than pshyc eval, which I already know my surgeon requires). I'm not one to remember things, dates and what not, but I think, this; I will.[/font]

[font='comic sans ms'][b]2013 March 30:[/b] Ok, my appointment with the surgeon and his office staff was eye opening and seriously information overload. I'm thankful that my surgeon is a previous obese person. He's living the life. My immediate change is to drop down to 30 gms per day in carbs. Houston, we may have a problem. Just taking a look at the carbs I consume on a normal day, OMGosh, that's one food item! So, I have to get smart on carbs. Good carbs! My husband is willing to be very supportive; this might make all the difference in the world. I have to meet with a member of the office staff for the next 3 months to go over my pre op weight loss which is required by my surgeon. [/font]

[font='comic sans ms'][b]2013 April 18:[/b] I went to my primary physician a couple of days ago finishing up the collection of some paperwork and I'm thinking do I really want to do this? Am I really sure? I thought, I'm going to back out of this thing. One of the last things I had to do that day was help the office staff draft up a memo of recommendation for surgery from my doctor and state his reasons why I should have this surgery. A portion of that memo was to list my co-morbodites. OMGosh, I'm a walking disaster! Then it occurred to me how I got to this decision in the first place. I really don't have a choice, well, I do, but it's no choice at all. I'm on my way to a new me. I had my first physician assisted weight management appointment this morning. I've lost 6.5 pounds! It was not easy. I'm coming to grips with a lot of things. Replaying in my head the things that Dr. Cywes spoke to me about. I'm addicted to food, I have to find a new way to eat, a new way to live. I've been working with a personal trainer at the Y. Up till last night it's been cardio. Last night he moved me up to weights as well. [/font]

[b][font='comic sans ms']2013 April 29: [/font][/b][font='comic sans ms']Had my dietitian appointment today along with 3 other women. Wow, we covered a lot! It was a very informative meeting/appointment and I've come away with a lot of homework and information to absorb. I am all of a sudden thankful I am gluten intolerant. That gets me all that much farther along in the "do not eat" category. I already had in my head to give up chocolate this week. Are you kidding?!!!! OMGosh, yes, I have to. I was surprised at how easy it was to give up Dr. Pepper, once I decided it was time to do it. Same goes--it's time.[/font]

[font='comic sans ms'][b]2013 May 9:[/b] My appointment today was for Physician Supervised Weight Loss. She asked if I had any questions since seeing the Dietitian at my last visit. None really come to mind. Since that appointment, I no longer eat rice or potatoes. That's 4 things down, woohoo! (Bread was first--I'm Gluten intolerant. Dr. Pepper oh so sad...I do still miss you some. then the rice, now the potatoes) I feel fairly comfortable in my food choices although I feel I'm not eating enough. Sometimes I just don't feel hungry. Since I'm no longer eating so many "bad" carbs, I'm not too concerned with not eating or missing meals. If I'm not hungry, I just don't eat.[/font]
[font='comic sans ms']I also talked with Jody about my frustration/problem with working out at the Y. I have a personal trainer but, I'm in such horrible shape and have been for so long, that after working out, that night, I can't sleep from the pain in my legs. After day 2 or 3, I feel the "good pain" where I know my muscles have worked and they are in what I assume is "repair" mode. She kind of stopped me right there. Maybe going to the Y isn't for me right now. Another 50-pounds or so, I might do better and not be "in pain", which is going to frustrate me and make me not want to go at all. The important thing at this point is to be busy. If I'm not "doing" I'm consuming. Ok, that's easy, plenty to do that's for sure. So long as I am learning a new way of eating. (Note to self: I'm addicted to food/eating is overrated!) On goal setting; set realistic goals. I need to reevaluate my current fitness goals and set new ones. My goals should change often. On that note, I will march forward with my head held high and work on our converation.[/font]
[font='comic sans ms']My next Physician Supervised Weight Loss appointment is June 13th. [/font]

[font='comic sans ms'][b]2013 May 17: [/b]So, I just found out that I have a letter coming in the mail, if not delivered already that my Surgeon is closing his practice. Great! :( Wonder how far back I will have to go back with my Tri-Care paperwork?! [/font]

[font='comic sans ms'][b]2013 Jun 14:[/b] It's been a confusing month for information from my surgeon's office. Finally had my 2d visit appointment with him yesterday. It was a "group" appointment. The last one before our paperwork is submitted for surgery! Holy Cats! So, the real scoop is Dr. Cywes will still do our surgeries, he's just closed down the Jacksonville, FL clinic office. He's now affiliated with a premier surgery center in Tampa, FL and I think "Palm Coast?". Either way, the distance is further but, I still can get the very experienced surgeon which is a great comfort to me.[/font]
[font='comic sans ms']As it turns out, I was supposed to arrange the pshyc appointment myself--I had been waiting on the doc to contact me. I could have had that done already and had my request submitted yesterday. :( [/font]
[font='comic sans ms']My total weight loss is about 20 pounds now. It's been really hard but I'm thankful for the education in learning a new way of eating. You really need the time before surgery to learn these new rules for eating and dealing with what triggers us to eat in the first place. Habit, frustration, anger, depression,,,,and on and on. I started gaining weight after I had the boys. I'm wondering about that. Was it the thought of these beautiful boys dependant on me that triggered emotional eating? Something to consider more deeply.[/font]
[font='comic sans ms']I don't expect I will be able to schedule my surgery until Billy's 2d break in classes. His first break is already spoken for to go home to spend time with his parents. Surgeries with Dr. Cywes are on Friday's in Tampa. I'm not sure about the other location. I guess I will find out when I submitt my last document, which will hopefully be in a week or 2. [/font]

[font='comic sans ms']I hadn't written in awhile...to catch up my story here goes.[/font]
[font='comic sans ms']My surgeon wanted to schedule my surgery woohoo right?! Wrong! He was only doing surgeries in West Palm Beach and Tampa. Those were both like 8 hours away. While I had all the confidence in the world it's still surgery anything could happen. With no surgeon in the local area, I just couldn't do it. I always say, everything happens for a reason. So, I resolved to go it the old fashioned way. [/font]

[font='comic sans ms']You guessed it, the 25 pounds I lost to get ready for surgery; oh yeah, it's back. My legs hurt again, my knees are creaking, I feel awful.[/font]

[font='comic sans ms'][font='comic sans ms'][b]2014 May 9[/b][/font][/font][font='comic sans ms'][font='comic sans ms'][b]:[/b] [/font]So a funny thing happened while at my PCMs office this morning. I always say, everything happens for a reason. I'm getting a referral for Plantar Fasciitiis and I mention to my PCM I see that the woman that used to be at the Bariatric Office in town with the previous surgeon is working there in his office. I say she's really great at what she does. He says do I want a new referral. So, don't look a gift horse in the mouth the older folks would say to us when we were young. Sign me up. I can't do this on my own. So I'm leaving to check out and she and I cross paths in the hallway. And she remembers me! [/font]
[font='comic sans ms']We have a great conversation, I meet the doc that used to work with the surgeon I had been signed up with in the first place. I filled out my initial paperwork, sign for records release and turns out, I will likely NOT have to start over!!!!!! Hello. [/font]
[font='comic sans ms']I go back in 2-weeks. I'm so excited! [/font]
[font='comic sans ms'][b]2014 May 24:[/b] Well I didn't make my appointment on the 20th. Gotta say, I was just unsure of what path I want to follow here. I'm afraid of failure. I've very recently started selling SABA for Life products. Their "flag ship" product A.C.E. doesn't agree with my stomach but for those that take it, have wonderful results with weight loss and increased energy. I got a call from the surgeon's office on Thursday to make an appointment. So, I will call them on Tuesday and make that appointment. I'll also call the local office to make up the appointment that I missed. I'm telling myself by this time next year, no more regrets.[/font]
[font='comic sans ms'][b]2014 Jun 7:[/b] Catching up. Lots of doc appointments since I last journaled. I've had an appointment with the PA at the local bariatric office. I first talked with the counselor; got new labs and EKG done so they would be current. My PCM ofc is having difficult getting my referral cleared through Tri-Care so I have had to reschedule my first appointment with the surgeon until 26 June. Not sure what it's going to take to get this thing through. I'll have to stay on top of this though or it won't get done. In the meantime, I'm headed home to NY to spend time with my parents for a couple weeks. My counselor wants me to journal my food and not gain any weight from here on out.[/font]
[font='comic sans ms'][b]2014 Aug 2:[/b] Catching up. Finally!! Something positive after a lot of frustration since I last wrote.[/font]
[font='comic sans ms']My obesity counselor has been great. The surgeon she was trying to get me in to at Jacksonville for some reason they and Tri-Care weren't communicating and they weren't communicating with me as promised, so in the meantime she's become familiar and confident in another surgeon who is closer!!! and just as good as the guy in JAX. After faxing my documents to his office, I had an approval in 24 hours!!!! Hello, happy dance. [/font]
[font='comic sans ms']I have one more monthly counseling left with her (obesity counselor) which she already forewarned me she'd be starting me on my pre-op diet; psyc eval, and meet the surgeon and I should be ready for a life altering event. Pretty scarry but it's time. [/font]