gowalking

Wasn't quite sure where to put this so I figured The Lounge was as good as any other place. So...I got a silver frame and a watch case for the boyfriend for Christmas. His daughter is getting married in March and I thought a frame would be better than taping a picture to the wall, which is basically what he does now. Suffice to say he was not terribly impressed with the frame when tape is good enough in his opinion. Happily, I also thought a watch case would be nice since he has about ten wristwatches and they're all over the place so I was looking forward to his reaction when I gave him gift number two. What I didn't know was that he has so many watches because they're cheap and rather than replace the batteries, he just replaces the watches. So I basically struck out on the gift ideas. I finally came up with a good idea at bedtime. I made him feel oh so good last night that he's walking funny this morning...LOL. I'm not sure if I can re-gift tonight but I'll try....

Welcome Kirsten. Where in NY are you? I'm in NYC but I know it's a pretty big state and you might be somewhere near Canada for all I know.

Have a wonderful holiday season Alex. Here's to 2016 and another wonderful year.

Condolences on your loss Joe. Can't imagine what your Aunt and Uncle are going through. On a happier note though...the picture of you and the Mrs. is lovely. Have a wonderful Christmas and happy new year. I know that 2015 was a good one for me...especially with the addition of my grandson born eight months ago today as a matter of fact. I'm surely looking forward to 2016. We have our family cruise in June and the boyfriend and I have a number of things coming up...the Philharmonic, The Who, Earth, Wind, and Fire, The Barber of Seville at Lincoln Center...and cuddling on the couch watching TV.

I agree with Dub. Dating can be exhausting and there's nothing wrong with taking a break.

I might as well add my two cents. Even when I was morbidly obese and wide open to lots of horrific comments, most people just ignored me..and that was fine as far as I was concerned. I wanted to be invisible. I can't even imagine being subjected to the comments the OP said were directed at him. I must agree with most of the folks on this thread...you need new friends.

Oh the pics are terrific. I must admit I wasn't sure about the hair color when you first changed it, but I am liking it more and more each time I see it on you.

Oh Lisa...I'm so sorry you're having issues. I hope you are doing better now that some of the fluid is out. You poor thing...you and Ken should just relax and do nothing for a few days if possible.

I didn't realize our surgeries were only a day apart. We're band twins...LOL.

Wishing you well and hoping you can get the revision.

Just thought I'd post this pic from Saturday night at Lincoln Center. Went to see Handel's Messiah and wanted to dress very festively to go with the holiday theme. Found this outfit in my closet...it actually belonged to my mom and she gave it to me last year when she finally admitted she'd never see this size again. Those slacks are a size 6. Three years ago I was wearing slacks in a size 24. Yup...24. Anyway, I hope my smile is as bright and sparkly as the top I have on. I can't believe how much fun it is to decide what to wear instead of just putting something on that hopefully fits.

It's likely a combination of real and head hunger. I know when the snack demon rears it's ugly head in the evenings, it's time for me to do something to take my mind off food. I stop watching TV and start doing something with my hands..even if it's just solitaire on the laptop. Usually thoughts of food start to fade and I make it through another challenge. Oh...and yes, fills will help with real hunger...which will come back. Not being hungry is not realistic. It's not going to stay that way as you can already see. Start doing jigsaw puzzles..or crossword puzzles, or take up knitting. Good luck and keep us posted.

Welcome and congratulations on the beginning of your new life. I used the same surgery as you at NYU. I went with Dr. Ren but I've met Dr. Schwack once or twice. My three year anniversary is next month and not a day goes by that I don't feel so very grateful for the band and my vastly improved quality of life.

I did so much damage to my joints that even with a loss of 145 lbs., I've still undergone joint replacement surgery and I take pain meds and NSAIDS daily to deal with the pain and discomfort in my knees and other joints. I also am able to walk without a cane and in much less pain than before losing the weight so I know to take the good with the bad. I don't know why you can't take NSAIDS but don't feel like a failure for having to go through this. Think of it this way...if you hadn't lost the 85 lbs. you would probably be in much worse shape (knee-wise I mean)

Glad to hear no slip. Sorry you're spending a Sunday in the ER. One of the few places I haven't been at NYU. Been to almost every other part of that hospital though.... Keep us posted.

Nothing personal @@Ambergraham145 but I think you are on the wrong thread. We are a semi-private group of bandsters who've been on this site for several years and are a separate group of friends. Your posts should go on the main boards so others can see what you write and give you help/advice and support.

On the "goal weight" topic - I gave up on my unrealistic pre-op goal weight a long time ago. Around the 18 month mark, when I hit my lowest weight, I realized that I was never going to get there and I was totally OK with that. During this process, this has become about so much more than a number on a scale. For 43 years I identified myself as the funny fat girl - I would make self-depricating remarks and people would laugh and I wouldn't let people know how unhappy, sad and full of self loathing I was. I would eat in private - I would actually look forward to when my husband and son would leave so I could eat. It was a horrible hell in which I lived. So, I was avoiding the 17 pound weight gain - If I didn't talk about it, it didn't happen. My jeans weren't THAT tight. My fear of going back to where I was 2 years ago, quite frankly, scared the **** out of me. After a few days of regaining control, with the help of the appetite suppressants, I'm not feeling like that any more. I feel like I'm working TOWARDS my goal of healthy living, not avoiding (there is not a number attached to that "healthy living" goal"). I mentioned above this process has become more than the number on the scale - I want to expound on that, especially for the newly sleeved or the pre-oppers. My life is wonderful. This process has made me a better person - I have found out I am stronger than I ever realized. I smile ALL THE TIME. I am genuinely happy. I've become more outgoing - I make it a goal when I travel to spend time talking to one random stranger daily - that has helped with shyness and has helped me come out of my shell. My husband and I have a great relationship - we did before surgery, but now it's more (not too much detail, but the physical aspect of our relationship is much better - that was my hangup not his). My son sees me as a role model for physical activity - we work out together, we go to hot yoga together, we cook together, our relationship is stronger. Work - that has been a wild ride. I went from wanting to quit my job 14 months ago, to getting a promotion and now being viewed a valued member of the executive team. That wouldn't have happened 75 pounds ago when I was perfectly happy giving my ideas away freely and not speaking up in meetings. I now walk into a conference room and take a seat at the table as opposed to sitting in the background with my back against the wall. I simply adore what you wrote about goals and how a goal weight is not what's important. I bounce around between 120 and as much as 129. My lowest weight was 112. The numbers are not not not important. What's important is how my life has changed for the better because I'm a normal size once again. I try to stay around the same weight because I want my clothes to not be tight, and I want to feel in control. Otherwise this is all about how my life has improved. No, it's not perfect, but it's so different than it was three years ago. I am happy and healthy for the most part. I do what I want and nothing stops me...not my size, not my mobility..or lack thereof. My three year anniversary is coming up and this is what I will write about. Thanks for providing the topic @McButterpants.

CowgirlJane is sooo right. I went into the pool first and have bad joint disease in both the hips and knees. This was the only way I could exercise and after my hip replacements, water exercise helped me to rehab better than even going to physical therapy. I can't say enough for you to go this route. Good luck!

Hang in there Julie. These are the hardest times. You just have to get through them. In time, you will find new traditions and it won't always be this bad. Your job right now is just to make it to New Years. Just know I'll be thinking of you and keeping you in my heart. Liz

...and this is why I stay on these boards. Even if I don't post anything, I don't leave. I've seen too many vets disappear and just like @@McButterpants, it seems they do so when things go south. As much as we like to think folks are successful and fade away into the sunset, and their lives, I am even more convinced that a large portion go away because they are struggling. I refuse to do this. I'm still about ten lbs. heavier than I was at my 'happy place' of 115 but every morning I remind myself it's a new day and do my best to stay on track. Glad to see you here again @@McButterpants and hoping this suggestion by your doctor helps you to get back on track. This just shows me that the fight against bad choices is a daily struggle and some days we do well and others not so much. If I've said it once, I'll say it a hundred times. Don't tell me that food is not an addiction. We're all addicts and the hunger monster is always lurking.

You're likely very swollen. Agree with the poster above. I hope you went directly to the emergency room or spoke to your surgeon.

It sounds like you are overfilled to me as well but I'm not a doctor. Tell him or her exactly what you just posted so it can be taken care of and you can use the band as it's supposed to be used. No one should have issues getting food down other than sliders.

Hey Gowalking! Hello back at you. It looks like our surgery dates are about six months apart. I am glad the recent fill is working for you. I had one, too, and I feel like I am still adjusting. I have about seven pesky pounds that have crept back that I need to shed. Good luck with your goal. Good luck to you too Kat. Where in Florida are you? I come down often to the Ft. Lauderdale area where my folks live.

Just checking in with my peeps to find out how everyone is doing. I know it's a very busy time of the year but hoping everyone is doing well and staying on track. I'm going to go for another fill after the new year. It's better since the recent fill, but I'd like a little more satiety so I'm going to get a bit more Fluid put in. Still hovering around 125 lbs. Up and down a couple but not gaining steady as I was. Still hoping to get under 120 and that's my short term goal. Long term is what it always was. Stay in control, stay healthy, and be happy. FYI, nearly three years for me. I'll post something once I'm closer to my bandiversary. Happy Tuesday!

Just had an interesting interaction at work. An admin stopped into my office asking for a pen to borrow to sign off on a lunch order for a meeting. I like to kid around so I said, 'sure...but it will cost you a cookie.' As a fat woman, I would have never said that. It would have been embarrassing because I would have expected her to think that the last thing I needed was a cookie. But as a normal sized person, there is no embarrassment when it comes to 'bad' food. I don't think twice if I have ice cream in my shopping cart...or some other item that once upon a time would make me look around and wonder who was checking out what I was eating. And by the way....she brought me two Cookies. I told her that I was only joking and all she did was wink at me. I know people say all the time that they have not changed...only their bodies have changed. I know that everything has changed for me. Yes...I'm still basically the same woman I always was, but a better, more outgoing, comfortable in my skin woman now. Not that I don't have my issues still...nothing is perfect. But even little interactions are different..and big ones as well. I look people in the eye now. I used to look down. I have a sense of confidence I didn't have before. I'm understanding that it was the confidence and satisfaction in my life that attracted my boyfriend to me...and not just that I was a small body. Especially as he's seen all the loose skin, hanging boobs, etc. and he tells me how much he loves to see my naked body..how it turns him on. He's seeing something else in his mind's eye...and not my physical 'flaws'. I just think we don't always see or realize all the changes. We notice the big things...the typical NSVs but not necessarily the daily interactions that shift as we change...or should I say 'evolve'. Anyway...just wanted to get my thoughts out on a post. Back to work now...