gowalking

Please don't wait for him to make a move because he won't. If you are unhappy, talk to a lawyer and get your ducks in a row. Life is way too short to be miserable. Really.

I lost 145 lbs. while eating 1/4 cup of carbs with my dinner...and even eating bread in moderation. I love carbs so I have to be careful but as long as I limit them, I seem to be fine. I know many others stay away completely but I have not had to do that.

As lonely as I was when my first husband died...I was alot lonlier knowing my second husband and I were like strangers while sharing the same bed. How horrible to be feeling alone when your spouse is sleeping right beside you. I subsequently left him and was alone (without a partner) for 15 years. I was never lonely though. I make sure to have a support system of friends and family. And I learned that being by myself was not that terrible. Really...don't be afraid to be alone. There are alot of good things about being alone. You don't have to compromise..your life is your own. Be in control of your life and do what you need to in order to make yourself happy. Or if not happy, then make yourself strong...or better yet, find out how strong you really are. Good luck.

Yeah...I remember how scary it was for me to stop using MFP but I also knew that I had the info I needed to continue to make the right choices. I must admit though that at home, I still weigh my food. My concern is that I'll increase the amount little by little and I have to be careful not to do that. I'm not so crazy as to weigh when I'm out to dinner or with others in a social situation but at home...yup...I weigh.

I'm also nearly three years post band. Just like Sharpie, I'm glad to see you online Terry and glad that you are doing well. I've been trying to get under 120 lbs. but find myself fluctuating between 120-125. As long as I don't have any issues getting into my pants, I'm OK with this as a final number. Hell...at 267 before the pre-op liquid diet, I'm more than OK with being 120ish. LOL.

Oh good. I was starting to think I was imagining it.

LOL. Yes...I know. He wouldn't have said wow...that sux...losing all that weight. But it was how he said it. I got the impression that he was saying more than just good for you. It felt like he was also telling him good for you for doing it without surgery. Maybe I was reading him wrong...but I'm curious if anyone else thought the same as me.

I watched the show too. I haven't had my surgery yet. Scheduled for Jan 26th. I would love to know how watching it post-surgery you have a different perspective of the show? For me, I wouldn't watch when I was obese. Much too painful. I watch now as a cautionary tale.

Hi Lisa. I just presumed the show would pay for the surgery. Why in the world would anyone want to show their 'stuff' to the world if not for getting something out of it. Doesn't the 600 lb. show pay for WLS and skin removal that Dr. Now does? I thought they did. Holy crap!! I'd never show the world my ugly skin and scars without getting something out of it...

This was a good thread till I saw this. For heaven's sake, stop bashing surgeries that did not work for you. I understand you had issues with the band, but lots of others including myself have done well with it and are happy. Your initial post about why you are revising is fine. It's your story and you have every right to speak to it. But this post is unnecessary. Honey you are new to the game.I just had a 5 hour revision surgery because My esophagus band stomach ....major organs are messed up from years of having that lapband!I am speaking from experience!I am not new to the rodeo of WLS!I have had the band since 2004.I will say what I please. With all due respect, you're missing the point of my issue with your statement. I'm very sorry you have had obviously serious issues with the band and your story is not to be dismissed. It's the blanket statement you made that I have issues with. There are plenty of long time bandsters who are just fine. Alex Brecher, the founder of this site, is one of the first people who comes to mind.

I was always a chubby kid, but there was a brief time in my life when I was slim and fit - between the ages of 17 and 22 when I took Metabolife. Don't know if you all remember it, but I basically took speed to lose weight. It went off the market and I gained all the weight back. Which is all good I suppose since Metabolife turns out to be profoundly unhealthy. In any case, reading this post reminded me of something I miss much more than cute, affordable clothes: the ability to move. Run. Climb. Carry. Play. I deeply miss having a body that could do more than lounge on the couch and lift a fork to mouth. I used to be able to run and jump and participate in sports. Now I'm the woman sitting in a chair drinking a beer watching everyone else play because it hurts too much or I run out of breath too quickly. It's so depressing. I got my membership to the Y and I can't wait to get my butt back into shape. I joined the Y even before my WLS. All I could do was paddle around in the pool, but at least I did something. Now I do laps, Water exercises, core strength training, biking and the treadmill. No...I'm not ready for the Olympics...not by a longshot. But I am mobile again and it's a beautiful thing. You will be as well...

It does!! That's one of the reasons dresses and skirts are OK now. No more chub rub. No more chafing or sweaty inner thighs. Pantyhose goes on without fighting, and I don't have to worry I'll cause a run trying to pull them up and stuff myself into them. Oh the pleasures of being normal sized. It's wonderful...you newbies have no idea the marvelous things coming your way.

This was a good thread till I saw this. For heaven's sake, stop bashing surgeries that did not work for you. I understand you had issues with the band, but lots of others including myself have done well with it and are happy. Your initial post about why you are revising is fine. It's your story and you have every right to speak to it. But this post is unnecessary.

I didn't read all the replies but I get the gist of this. My take is that this is not their problem..it's ours. We, and I mean pretty much all of us on these boards, have body image issues. We do not see ourselves as we really are..and I mean when we are heavy or normal sized. Our perceptions are distorted so any type of comment, even flattering ones, can be taken the wrong way. I'm almost three years post WLS, and two years in therapy and only now can I see myself more as others do. Not always..I still have issues. But most of the time, when I look in the mirror, I see a slim, middle aged woman who I know looks younger than her 57 years, but still has lines on her face, crow's feet, and a myriad of things that would indicate I've lived quite a life in terms of what my body has been through. Basically I'm saying that we shouldn't take things so personally even when they feel personal. Take a compliment for what it is even if it's presented poorly...and learn to enjoy the normalcy that comes with losing the weight.

I'm almost three years post WLS and to my surprise, I have become a dress person. My office is like many other suburban offices...the women wear very casual outfits..not like when I worked in Manhattan and both men and women wore suits. I used to wear slacks with elastic waistbands of course, and tops that covered my belly...even though I was so heavy that it really didn't matter. 'Sensible (meaning ugly) shoes. No makeup...no accessories. Now I wear dresses almost daily. Makeup every day. bracelets, necklaces, earrings...always. Shoes with heels. Small heels, but heels none the less. Pretty shoes...not old lady shoes. I don't want to sound boastful but I am noticed all the time. Men are more gentlemanly...holding open doors and such. Women are nicer. Yes..they are nicer. It's not fair, but it's true. I can go into my manager's office and feel confident rather than scared and nervous. Same with vendors and co-workers. Just realize that it takes a while to find your 'style'. You will probably buy some pretty awful stuff till you realize what works for you and what doesn't. It's a process after you've been buying things just because they fit rather than whether or not they are flattering. But once you start to know what you like, and what looks good on you, it's a marvelous part of the journey back to the land of the living. Have fun!

OK...I must admit I watched it last night. Usually my BF comes over on Wednesdays but I had my personal training last night so he didn't come over and I was able to watch the show. If he was staying by me last night, we would have watched something else for sure. So..my opinion is that I am even more convinced after watching the episode, that I'm not ready for surgery. Yes...I want to get rid of the saggy skin. No...it's not as bad as the woman in last night's episode. Also...I don't hate my body the way she did. I can cover up the parts I don't like, and I have no issues with intimacy. My BF has made it very clear that he is enamored of me regardless of the saggy skin, saggy boobs, scars, etc. There is nothing off limits as far as his touch on my body so while that was a huge issue for her, it's not one for me. I also think that they will be inundated with people trying to get on the show to get surgery without having to pay for it. LOL.

The best tip I can think of is that you may and likely will be miserable. I was as were so many others. But...it's all worth it in the end.

Google it. If there's a correlation, you should see something(s) come up. Presuming anyone has done this type of study.

It took me months to go through my husband's things and years to get rid of everything. I still have some things that I'll never get rid of like his wallet and everything that was in it when he passed. Take it easy with this part. Do what you can if you feel up to it, and walk away if/when you aren't able to take on this task.

Well, I made it thru the week. The BF spent this past week at my place and he's all about pizza and Chinese and ice cream. I was very concerned I would backslide and it worried me considerably. He goes home later today and I weighed 121.6 last Sunday and 122.6 this morning. One pound is nothing. We had sushi for dinner last night so some of it is likely Water anyway. While so many on this board worried about the holidays, I worried about this. I feel so proud of myself for avoiding the landmines and not blowing myself up. Hooray for me.

Miss: eating to excess. There's a container of leftover spaghetti and sauce in my fridge right now that is calling my name. I need the boyfriend to eat it for lunch today so I can toss whatever is left over. I have grilled salmon, veggies, and a small piece of baked potato for my lunch. Don't miss: being obese and all it entails. hating to buy clothes..hating to go to parties and such because I hate the clothes I have to wear. Hating the feeling of invisibility but grateful for that rather than being stared at or made fun of. Hating being the biggest person in the room, hating being immobile... shall I go on? It's why I can leave the cold spaghetti where it is even though I want to eat it.

Hi Friends. As we are only days away from the new year, I was taking stock of 2015 and thinking about how it went for me. I had many health issues in 2014 and while I lost most of my weight in 2013, I was focusing on getting myself better physically the first couple of years of my journey. For the first time this year, I was past most of my health issues or learning to live with them. I could finally enjoy my new life as a normal sized person who no longer was in horrific pain or had mobility issues. The highlights...a new grandchild born in April. The best thing about Holden and my weight loss is that I can get down on the floor with him and play or I can walk around the neighborhood with him in the stroller. I'm no longer limited by what I can do with him. We're taking a family cruise in June and I expect to be running after him all over the ship. That was not possible pre WLS. The second highlight is that for the first time in oh...about 15 years, I have a man in my life. The weight loss was health related, not relationship related. But once I felt healthy, the thoughts of sharing my life with someone came back. I am enjoying the things I didn't even realize I missed such as the touch of a man and the closeness of having physical love in my life. From a practical standpoint, I can move around in a way that was impossible before WLS and even with the loose skin, saggy boobs, scars and other things that let's me know I'm no spring chicken, I feel like a young girl when we are in bed together...or when we are walking around the city holding hands. If the relationship fizzles, so be it...I still have a great life with or without him, but for now, I'm very happy sharing my life with this man. Third....was my lifelong wish to get to London. I finally made it there this past summer and walked all over the city. Was it perfect? No. I actually had pain and couldn't walk as much as I wanted...but I still walked and biked as much as possible. I took the bus and the 'underground' and nothing stopped me. I was afraid that I'd missed my chance to travel when I was too heavy to do so comfortably and now, the whole world is open to me again. I've gotten a second chance and I'm not going to blow it. Every time I think about eating poorly..and making bad choices, I think about all that I've gotten back over the last few years and it's usually enough to make me stop going down the wrong path. And best of all, my day to day life is full of the simple pleasures of fitting in the world again...both physically and emotionally. I'm no longer on the sidelines watching others live their lives while I cannot. Nothing holds me back anymore. I never have to think about whether or not I can do something..I just do it. Now that I can walk with no effort, I can do anything I want...or go anywhere I want. The only thing better than 2015 will be 2016...and the years after that. I feel younger and healthier now that I did ten years ago and because of that, I look forward to each and every new year and the adventures they may bring. Wishing all my BP friends a very happy and healthy new year and here's to 'losing..and how much we gain when we lose and maintain'.

Congrats and welcome to the boards. I wish I could give you a crystal ball so you can see how great things will be a year from now. I was banded in 2013 and after several health issues were taken care of, I had a much better 2014 and a terrific 2015. I'm so looking forward to 2016 as my life just keeps getting better and better..

Your weight loss doesn't count when you're sick because chances are when you feel better, you'll eat more and the weight may go up. I remember when I weighed myself after having a colonoscopy. Of course I had lost five pounds in one day...but I gained it all back once I started to eat again.

Welcome. I've been on this forum for three years and it's been my place for support and solace. I've said things here that I've said no where else. What I can recommend for you is to do your homework and read up and investigate all types of WLS and go with the one that you and your doctor think will work best for you. Much of this process and the success you will have is a combination of physical restrictions due to the surgery and the choices you will make day in and day out. Also..if you are having joint pain now, it will only get worse. I'm a cautionary tale as are many on these boards. I had both hips replaced due to degeration caused by genetic disposition..and carrying all that extra weight. The sooner you get down to a normal size, the better off your joints will be.