gowalking

I haven't even finished watching it yet and it has me in tears. I know these women, I know and understand their stories. I see some that I recognize from 600 lb. life by the way. Everything they are talking about..the shame, the 'acceptance', the men who are attracted to them...the weight loss, the struggle..it all resonates. I also know why I never ever tried to date when I was obese. I am NOT interested in men who are interested in fat women. I don't want to judge but this is a fetish same as any other. Mostly though, I'm paying attention to things like 'thinking like a thin person' or seeing ourselves as fat even if we are not any longer...or how we change on the inside as we change on the outside. Likely I focus on this because my weight loss journey has ended. I'm in maintenance now and am exploring ways to cope with my issues so my maintenance lasts the rest of my life. I just posted that I ate cold spaghetti the other day right out of the pot. I did that before being banded and doing it again after three years scared the crap out of me. That is an old behavior yet those behaviors don't go away...we just keep them at bay. I want to have this documentary to go to whenever my resolve is weak. This is such a cautionary tale for me...it shows me what can happen if I'm not keeping on top of my addiction. It shows me how easy it is to pretend the weight doesn't matter when it does. It shows me that I can't ever go back there again. My god...this is all kinds of horrifying for me but yet I have to watch and remind myself I'm not cured. Never cured. I have to compartmentalize The Fat Girl. I need to keep her hidden so I can be normal but make sure to never forget that she lurks and can get the better of me if I'm not careful. If you haven't seen this show yet...watch it before it's not available online for free anymore.

http://www.bariatricpal.com/page/all_of_me.html

as far as alcohol goes...I stay away from drinks with high calorie additives and also anything carbonated. So..it's mostly wine I drink. I do so sparingly for the most part and this works for me...but I didn't really start drinking wine till I was around six months or so post WLS.

I watched 600 lb. life and Skin Tight last night. Was glad to see June get her act together. I was sure she was going to be another Penny. As far as Skin Tight, I agree completely that there is an obvious bias against WLS. Most of those who've had surgery also change eating habits and spend alot of time at the gym so I call BS on it being thought of as the easy way out...but heck, I'm preaching to the choir here. We all know how hard we still have to work. All I kept thinking is that both of these folks who lost it the 'old fashioned way' would likely gain it back. We all know losing it is easy compared to maintaining.

You need to speak with your surgeon about a fill possibly to help with the hunger and you should also look for a professional to help you with the depression and lack of motivation...and why you cheat. I'm not saying this just to hear myself...I have been banded for three years and two years ago, I started seeing a therapist to help me with the root causes of my obesity and why I use food as a reward, or as punishment, or why I choose poorly or eat to excess. Doesn't mean I'm cured, but I've been in maintenance for about 18 months and working it every day...even if I'm not always successful. Having a buddy is nice, but ultimately, you have to be accountable and not lean on others for your motivation. Tough love I know but I believe in you and we're here on this forum to help however we can. Let us know what the surgeon says. Call today for that appointment! Oh...and just so you know, I'm also 50 something and until I had my surgery, very sedentary. I still don't like to exercise, but I do it..and once I get to the Y, I am always glad I did. Heading over there tonight as a matter of fact to spend an hour in the pool Water exercising.

Average weight loss with the lap band is 1-2 lbs. a week. Keep that in mind and you will see that you are doing just fine. Don't wonder if you are doing something wrong based on the scale. If you are following the basic lapband tenents of Protein first, fluids (water), exercise, and making healthy choices, you will be successful. Good luck and welcome to 'the other side' as we like to call it.

I have no words....

Oh lord, Lisa... Keep me posted.

Sorry if I confused you Deb. I'm 125 in this picture taken a few weeks ago. I was 250 lbs. four years ago.. Julian is the BF. I thought it would b nice to have you guys see a picture of him.

Just wanted to show you all the picture of me and Julian taken at our company Christmas party. I still have the picture of me at the party back in 2011 when I was probably 250 or so lbs. and had such trouble standing during the cocktail hour due to my knee and hip pain. I don't know how many times I can say thank goodness I got this WLS.

It's fairly standard to not work out for 4-6 weeks post op but you should check with your doctor to be sure. I swim so I had to wait six weeks to completely heal the incision before getting in the pool. Walking however was encouraged from Day 1

I saw 'Fun Home' on Broadway last month. Very good...and very interesting story. Let me know if you recommend the book.

A friend at work told me her MIL had WLS. As this friend has always known about my being banded, she had no problem telling me her obese and ill (comorbidities such as Type2 diabetes and hypertension) MIL finally decided to do something about her situation and had some type of surgery. (She's not sure which one). It's now about five months since mom had surgery and my friend tells me she hasn't lost much weight at all. I was surprised that it wasn't noticible after this much time but now I know why. Friend had her in-laws over last weekend and she said her MIL ate basically the same way she did before surgery. The only difference she could see was the amount was somewhat smaller but otherwise, she was eating the same food she ate before. Bagels at Breakfast, bad choices at lunch and dinner....and still drinking both wine and hard liquor. Including mixed drinks with high sugar additives. I can't begin to tell you all how much this bothered me. Why have surgery if you're not going to follow the rules? How did this get past her meeting with the psychologist? Why waste the opportunity when I see so many on these boards who desperately want surgery and can't get it. Anyway...that's why I put this is rants & raves. Can't do anything about it even though I'd like to shake this woman into appreciating the opportunity she was given..and has decided to throw away.

Thanks for the read Sharon. Your blog reminds me that some folks have it worse than others. You are a strong lady for sure!

I had to learn the same thing. Better to be alone than in the wrong relationship. Truer words were never written.

It's been three years so most of the NSVs have already happened but once in a while a new one pops up. Yesterday, I was sitting on the bus in a two seater by the window and had to get off and get past the lady beside me in the aisle seat. She didn't even bother to get up...she just did the body shift and moved her legs out of the way so I could get out. Not only was I able to do it, I was able to slip past her easily. I had the goofiest smile on my face when I got off the bus... This is the kind of thing that tells me I'm normal sized...not the scale. Second NSV...I was between meetings this morning and didn't want to bother putting the laptop back in the port so I worked at my desk with the laptop on my lap. Yes...my lap is now a flat surface with no stomach in the way. I've worked at home on a laptop for a while but tend to do so with feet up...either on the bed or the coffee table but this was with my feet firmly planted on the floor. I know I couldn't have done that before I lost the weight. These are good reminders of living life the way it was intended and not with the challenges of all the excess weight I carried.

Me too. Thank goodness for control top pantyhose/tights.

Stay warm and dry Lisa. Julian's here but busy studying for his PHR certificate so I'm in the bedroom watching the news and reading up on the forum. No chickens left at Citarella's last night so we ordered in Chinese. I'm up a pound this morning...darned sodium..so I took out salmon for dinner and will have the farrow and asparagus I bought the other day along with it. Julian can have the leftover Chinese food. Maybe I'll make popcorn tonight for a treat. We're gonna watch The Grand Budapest Hotel. Enjoy the blizzard my friend.

Congrats Deb! Good looking boy you have there.

Well...last night they said 6-12" in NYC and this morning they upped it to 12-18". The blizzard is upon us. I have all I need to make it thru the weekend. Protein, veggies, better choice Snacks, etc. And hoping to 'exercise' later with the BF...LOL. Everyone impacted, stay safe and warm!

I thought what you wrote yesterday was not inappropriate in any way. I didn't see all the responses but I know the post was deleted unfortunately. As I noted, I am in an interracial relationship and I never expected I'd date outside my race. Yet I found out that we have lots more in common even though we are of different backgrounds. And I know that I'm not the only one. Fortunately I live in NYC where anything goes..and no one has even given us a second look..or thought. Even my family is fine with this...because I'm happy with him. That's all that counts. Ignore the ignorant @@CowgirlJane and keep posting!

Get some girlfriends!! They're more reliable than men and except for the sex thing, alot more fun to hang with. (not that there's anything wrong with girl sex if that's your thing )

Dodgeball...it still makes me shudder all these years later. Alycia Miller always stood in the front and god help you if she aimed that ball at you. Many's the time I felt the 'wrath of Alycia' and knew early on not to even try to catch the ball. If you did, you could wind up with a dislocated or fractured finger.. Oh, and no...no one went to the gym teacher to complain. It never even occurred to anyone to say anything. Not sure if that's a good thing or bad.....

Even prepping for snow days has changed since WLS. The snow is due here early Saturday morning (I'm in NYC) and yesterday I went out shopping. Bought fruit to nibble on..and for dinner, I have farrow and asparagus to go with the roast chicken the BF is bringing by after work. What I didn't buy....how 'bout candy, Cookies, chips, soda, etc. That's just too tempting and why would I want to sabotage myself anyway. I did buy ice cream...because he likes it and I can eat a little bit and feel like I indulged. As far as what we have planned for fun...well...I'll leave that alone for discretion's sake...

Congrats on being banded. As with any surgery, you will have pain and/or discomfort where the incision is. I was banded three years ago so it's a bit fuzzy for me, but I don't recall anything out of the ordinary. I know I took less than a week off work and then worked from home for a week at most. After that, I was good to go.