DeLarla

Last night Kellymoose tried to PM me but I was away from my puter. If anyone talks to her, please tell her that yes, her family is more than welcome to stay with us during evacuation. Kelly, are you here? Were you serious?

AVOID I avoided this thread out of guilt. Now I'm logging off and showing Vooey & Sachi their leashes... then I can't say no. Off to the park.

I'm completely anal retentive to the point I often walk in circles crossing my T's and dotting my I's. I can't stand clutter or disorder, and even though I get pretty messy, I don't relax or think straight unless everything is tidy and in order. If my underwear, socks and earrings don't match, it's just a lousy day. I drive my husband and boss nuts because everything has to be "just so" before it goes out. I color coordinate all my case binders. I can't just wash a load of laundry; I have to strip the linens from all rooms. Once my husband tried to go to work wearing mismatched socks and I nearly had a coronary. If I stick a stamp on crooked, I have to peel it off and restick it. Imperfection causes me great anxiety, which is why I'm such a nervous wreck. So why doesn't this anal attitude roll over into my eating routine? Why doesn't my brain demand perfection in that area? This one's for Francesca. How many people thought I was going to talk about back door sex?

The numbers on the scale were getting ugly so I haven't hopped on lately. I've been adding more veggies and less goodies and getting back to using dinner plates instead of feeding troughs. I feel pretty good today and my pants are really comfy. Anyone else avoiding the scale?

I'm with Trish. I was on the suicide hotline at 315 pounds asking for ideas. Three Hundred Pounds is not living, it's dying.

I probably don't know what I'm talking about, but this is the best I can come up with. Your surgery most likely swelled up your whole belly area. If you're swollen, it could put pressure on the stomach area. For example, lots of us get extra restriction when we bloat from our periods. Try putting ice packs on your belly to reduce swelling. After your gallbladder surgery calms, maybe your stomach and band will relax??? Just a guess. I'm sorry you're going through all this. I had a lot of complications with my port surgeries, but nothing like yours. I'm really sorry.

Sorry that I had to end the story but it started freaking me out. How did you guys know that sticker is on my motorcycle helmet? (Dip me in honey and throw me to the lesbians.) And how did you know that Angie showed up with appetizers after everyone left the bash?

DeLarla dropped dead.

Mine aren't cravings - they are evil demons with 9 inch claws and sharpened fangs. I can't fight them alone, so I started a new hobby that keeps me too busy for TV. TV is a nasty culprit. Keep busy.

Paula, I have no idea what you're talking about. Details? David who? Waco? I even read your reply twice - I still don't get it. Xanax, who me? What strength would you like? PM me because I'm missing something. I never said I wanted anything banned. No, no, no. Just the opposite. On top of the Private Messages and e-mails, somebody disguised as a good Christian did something that was not very Christian to me, and I started this post because I'm sick of people sneaking around whipsering and hiding in Private messages and e-mails. When that didn't shut me up, they played a nasty little trick on me that backfired. I got mad and started this thread to open people's eyes. What's fair is fair. I just happend to chose religion versus sex because it makes for a good example. Shai, thank you. I appreciate you understanding my point.

This has always been one of my favorite foods on Earth! Only I saute spinach in olive oil and garlic first, then I add the feta. I also pound my breasts thin, then put the filling inside and roll them up, the secure with toothpicks and broil. Yep, this is a good one.

Thank you, Gaynor! I have several books started but I can't finish them while working as a paralegal. My writing comes to me in the form of God, which are messages sent to me from powerful and unexplainable voices that I interpret as God. Those voices tell me not to believe what man has written or spoken unless I first give it a personal and thorough analysis. I come to my own conclusions based on messages and intuition. I'm guided to be cautious, guarded and cynical until I have proof. Like I'll be doing something and suddenly lights come on, and Bingo, there's what I'm supposed to tell people.

Well, well, well. This hot little thread has 1288 hits in just a few days. I was looking at some other old threads - the Fall Weight Loss Challenge thread only got 1459 hits so far. What that tells me is that people come here for all types of support, laughter, friendship, advice, knowledge, controversy, a good laugh, and SEX. I don't know how this became a religious debate, and for that I apologize. I get loud messages out of the blue, I get attacked by sudden impulses, I have powerful intuitive skills and I'm guided by a force that I explain as God. He comes from my heart and soul, and he tells me to give till it hurts and live life to its fullest because the only guarantee I have is that I'm alive - right here, right now. Could someone else please start a religion thread? I promise, I won't go there for debate. I'll respect it, just as ya'll have respected me. Still, not one single peep from even one of the people who are so offended by my new career or my vagina. Peace.

There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job it was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses. One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God. He thought he should open it to see what it was about. The letter read: Dear God, I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension. Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension check. Next Sunday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with. I have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope. Can you please help me? Sincerely, Edna The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars. By the time he made the rounds, he had collected $96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman. The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends. Christmas came and went. A few days later, another letter came from the old lady to God. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened. It read, Dear God, How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me? Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends. We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift. By the way, there was $4 missing. I think it must have been those thieving bastards at the Post Office. Sincerely, Edna

One of the Vegas Bandsters just lost her band due to erosion. She didn't have any symptoms and was beginning to gain weight. She went 1.5 years with no fill but felt her port was different, maybe tipped. She had a bruise on her port that looked infected but cleared up, but an endoscopy revealed erosion. A popular Tijuana doctor placed her band (not Lopez) but they don't know why she eroded since she truly was the perfect bandster. It's not my business to reveal her name or doctor, but we all have the right to know when erosion pops its ugly head.

Happy Birthweek to you (that's my excuse for forgetting yesterday.) Hope it's grand!

It's those damn pheromones! But seriously, this brings me to something a really hot guy told me back in the old dating days. We had been "dating" for a couple months before it occurred to me that our entire relationship was in the bedroom. When I asked why we never went out, he was very honest. He said sex with me was better than all the skinny girls put together, and all guys love sex with fat girls but they're too embarrassed of what their friends will think. He found me extremely desirable but was embarrassed to be seen with me. He also believed the reason heavy women are so good in bed is because they are so desperate that they give the best blowjobs, which is something I never even did for him, so he apparently had a lot of big girl sex for that comparison study. That made me open my eyes to all the different guys that passed through my life in my 20s. I was a prude back then (probably why the wild woman came out later.) Lots of hot guys tried getting me in bed but it was rare to be asked out on a real date. So that guy hurt me terribly by what he said, but he actually helped me tremendously at the same time. I stopped getting used that day - from him and all the other guys that were too embarrassed to be seen with me. The sad thing is I was about a size 16 or 18. For a tall girl, that's not extremely huge. I look at pics and WISH I looked that awesome now.

(Tick tock, tick tock... I can't stand the suspense.)

I think I win the prize for knowing the most band doctors one-on-one. They all disagree at many levels, but the one thing they agree on completely is that erosion happens. Lopez appears to have the most erosions, but he also has the most patients. She went 1.5 years with no fill because she was doing great. Then the temporary port problem added to the weight gain made her decide to get a fill. Going to Mexico from here is a major ordeal, kill 2 birds with one stone. That's when he did the endoscopy and found erosion. I do know that port infection and erosion are related. She didn't mention that though, but since I'm the Queen of Port infections I happend to know that little diddy. I'm not sure if she's related to the person you're talking about. This is posted on the Vegas Bandster board, so it's not like I'm posting something private. I think we all need to know every thing.

I talked to a Bypass patient of Dr. Billy and she was thrilled, and she said all his other patients are thrilled. I wonder how much has changed with Bypass over the last couple years. I voted "yes" I'd have it. Then again, I'm a woman that changes my mind with the tides and moons.

My eyes were barely open when I wrote that, but I'm not allowed to delete my posts, darn. I agree that his marriage was over, and he's using the affair as an excuse to get out. There's a fairly large percentage of the married population that can't even have sex. Marriage shouldn't be about sex - the sex is a bonus. Think about sexual inadequacies, impotency, active STDs, or any sexual dysfunction. If a couple is in love and the man can no longer get an errection, does the woman leave him? Not if she loves him. What if a wife has genital herpes? People in love find ways to show affection other than sex. The ass cheated. Period.

I think it's time for an appearance from the Wench. Where is she?

Funny you should mention hubby. The day I met his parents (1.5 decades ago) was a nightmare from hell. His dad was watching the way I spent my own money and told Chris to cut me off. I told his dad to F off. Not that exact word, but close enough. His tiny late mom approached me with fire in her eyes and announced, "Nobody talks to George that way!" I looked two feet down, and breathed firey words into her face, "Nobody talks to ME that way." She huffed off and I smiled and played some poker. Poor Chris didn't know what to do with any of us, so we went home and left them at the hotel. The next morning, his mom called. After sleeping on it, the first thing she said is, "Chris, I like that girl. She's got sand!" She actually admired me for telling her husband off because he's a real bloop bleep blip bloop. I have the best husband in the world. We've hit lots of rough Patches since he's not the sharpest tool in the shed. But since I started my own business, my whole aura changed. I have a project, a goal, ambition, drive, determination. I'm not all wigged out or worried about our future. I found the answer I've been struggling for all these years, and it's worked magic on my marriage. And he has a great butt. Oh, and he gives "_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _." Send me a PM if you can fill in those blanks!

I thought I missed it, but it's 9/23 from 10-3. Boy, good thing we've all been banded or they'd go broke! $Five dollars gets you in for ALL THE ICE CREAM YOU CAN EAT. The damage I can do in five hours scares me. This also includes ice cream sundaes and root beer floats. I'm pretty much there. And it's the one food that we can overeat cause it makes for a pretty easygoing PB.

I just did my own rewarding so I'm a pro at this one. Go to Nordstrom and spend too much money on a new handbag. Then spend too much money on a 2nd one right there. Top it off with a wallet, a ridiculously expensive necklace and a charm for your cell phone.