nightingale2u

Oh... and I promised myself a scale check this morning... OMIGOD... I'm up to 230... that is a regain of 44 pounds from my lowest weight. Oy... it hurts to post that.

Morning All, Well... how strange that my band is kicking me in the butt when I need it most! Yesterday morning I got a chunk of bread "stuck"... and I slimed... and paced... and hung over the toilette... it was grand. After that episode...even soup didn't go down very well. Still... I wasn't ABOUT to let that stop me from eating the cornish game hen dinner my hubby made for Mother's Day.... Nooooooooooooooooo. Gawd I'm an idot. WELL... after 3 bites of dinner... back to the misery and hanging over the bowl. WAIT... that's not all... my hubby then went to get McFlurries for dessert and guess what... mine is still sitting in the freezer as I was up most of the night with my saliva barely going down. THe best part is in the midst of this Aunt Flo came to visit which gave me a clue to my sudden increase in restriction! So... I sit here sipping coffee veeeerrrryyyy slowly and feeling pretty darn lucky that my band kicked in at the very moment I needed it the most. I hope this helps me get it together. I also told my hubby how devastated I am with my failure with the band... I can barely face myself or others that know I had bariatric surgery. Part of my failure is due to not being able to tolerate the fills... but honestly... what the heck is my excuse now? Anyhoo... all stuff I have been trying not to think about... but it's hard to deny that none of my clothes fit and I am wearing one pair of pants over and over that I purchased to fit my ever expanding a$$. I really thought this rollar coaster ride was over in my life but I think the band needs to be around my brain instead of my stomach! Anyhoo... I know that I'm the only one that can change the path I'm on but just needed tattle on myself so that I could quit sitting here in denial. Now... could somebody please go to my freezer... take out that McFlurry and toss it for me?

Happy Mother's Day everyone! Donna... I'm moving in with you... just thought I would give you the heads up on that! BTW,,, You look absolutely fantastic girl! Betty... Cindy... I'm sorry that this day brings up sadness and loss... maybe at some point it will be a day to celebrate the wonderful Mom's that I'm sure you will see again. I used to feel that way about Father's Day but time passing has softened those feelings into a day of looking back and remembering the good moments with my Dad... Patty... hang in there... I can remember being so frustrated with insurance company... once they had the goods I wanted to KNOW!!!!!! THEN... they approved the surgery and my surgeon still have me a date a month and a half out...lol. Needless to say... it all came together eventually! Eileen... You're killing me girl! I can't think of that band now without seeing balls and their faces and granny panties on their heads. Sherry...Woo Hoo!!!! Even at my lowest I wasn't smaller than when I met my hubby... and I don't even want to talk about where I am now!!! You've worked hard... Congrats!!!! Anne... It's raining here too... and it's cold ... miserable really...lol. I bet your baskets are beautiful... hmmm... maybe I'll get my hubby started on that trend! He bought me a beautiful weeping snow fountain cherry tree two years ago... it didn't make it through this winter... *pout* Dianne... I imagine you are gone already... but if not... HAVE A WONDERFUL VACATION!!!! Miss Becky Lee... I need to follow your example... and I think that is just what I will do starting tomorrow... this is crazy what I am doing to myself! Darn it all... if only you were here to drag me kicking and screaming to the gym! Ivan... Wishing your DW an uneventful surgery experience and a quick recovery. Looking forward to the pics! Okay...guess I will go make a plan for this next week... I think I am going to have to join WW again... or jump off a cliff... jumping would clearly be the easier of the two options...lol. My Mother's Day gift to myself is going to be facing reality... getting on the scale... getting another fill... whatever I have to do. Wish me luck.

Hi Ladies... Patty... ((((Hugs)))) You are a strong lady and a fantastic Mom. I can't imagine what it is like having your baby be sick... I feel very lucky that so far I have been spared that. Sorry for the absence... My sister called me on Sunday and told me our Mom was coming for a visit on MONDAY and that they would be stay with me!!!! OMIGOD... talk about going into a panic! Needless to say is was a frantic rush to prepare for company. THey left this morning and it was a nice visit but I'm totally spent. I'll have to try and catch up on personals later... a nice loooooonnnngggg hot bath awaits! Oh... the weather is crap right now... brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr TTFN

I'm ASkeered of everything... HECK... nobody can walk into the room without startling me...lol. It used to scared the crap out of my husband... now he is sure to announce from WAAAAAYYYYY down the hall that he is entering the room! Eileen... No worries... I had the hair loss as well... I had gobs of it coming out and plugging up the tub drain. It did finally stop... and the hair returned! Unfortunately... it still returned mostly gray... damn... I was hoping for curly red hair! I love smelly ole flowers... especially the purple ones! Patty... Oh man... food poisoning sucks! I still can't eat mexican food to this day because of my experience. I ended up vomiting blood by the time it finally went away! It was AWFUL... ((((Hugs)))) Cindy... I think May should be the YEEHAW it's almost over month...lol. :eek: I can't even imagine being a teacher... they'd all be standing in the corner...lol. Kat... Sorry you have allergies to smelly ole flowers. :confused: I do too... but only if we bring them into an enclosed space... Easter Lillies nearly kill me. Still... I am a lover of blooms and basically anyting that I can plant and watch grow! Becky Lee... I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy that you are here!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!! Next weekend there will be more flowers popping up for a picture and pretty soon the FROGS will be out and about... I'll snap some pics for you. :pray2: We have a nice variety of sweet tree frogs. Sherry... Men suck...lol. My hubby can do the same thing but he has grown wise and keeps those numbers to himself. :waytogo: Don't feel bad about being left behind... thank goodness Pat told me there was a new thread or I'd still be posting in April! Rene... LOL... Bloody steaks are sneaky! Gawd I love steak... wait... I love all food and all of it jumps onto my plate when I'm not lookin! Oh... I want to thank you bcause I have had that Simon and Garfunkel song going round and round in my brain every since you posted about going to the fair. *sigh* Donna... Nothing feels better than buying clothes in a smaller size! You deserve that outfit...enjoy it!!!! Betty... I'm counting to 10 as I type...lol. I shoud start a jar and put money in it every week for what I would have spent on cigs... NAHHHHH... I just want to forget that I was stupid enough to smoke the darn things in the first place! I bet your yard is blooming pretty... lets have a picture! Sorry if I missed anybody... have to go pick up my girl in a bit. Leftovers for dinner. :clap:

AWWWWWWW .... Just want to pinch those cheeks... and grandson's too. WHat a cutie! Attaching a pic from the cabin to bring in May/Spring.

Told you my brain cells were limited in availability today.

Hey All YAY... Becky's here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Welcome Becky... now see... that didn't hurt a bit did it???? Congrats on getting on the downswing... pass a lil of that self-control my way when ya get a chance! ((((Hugs)))) We had a fairly good time at the cabin... it was a bit rainy and the fire danger was high so we couldn't have a campfire. *pout* BUT... we smelled a helluva lot better than usual when we left...lol. Oh... and I ended up with a tick *shudder shudder* they really give me the heebies! We are having probs with our German Shepherd... she went after my nephew unprovoked... scared the living hell out of me! I don't think she would have bit him but it sure sounded bad. She is on prednisone and has been for quite awhile... I have a call into the vet to see if that can cause personality changes. On Sunday she literally attacked our big screen TV when it had geese honking on a program... I nearly soiled myself. ANyhoo... I am really working to get everyone in the house to be Alpha over her right now. I love her dearly but would not keep a dog this large and powerful if she became unpredictable and agressive. Doing okay with the not smoking... all of the sudden my chest hurts and I am starting to cough up fur balls... I didn't think it would take this long for the lungs to finally expel the goods? My Dad died of cancer... I don't know where the primary was but he smoked like a chimney for years... he was 41. I also watched many a patient suffer with end stage COPD... it's a horrible way to die. Soooo... I am determined... I may eventually be too large to fit through my front door but I'm not ever smoking another cig. Only got a couple hours sleep last night... so I think I will go take a little nap... my brain can't wrap itself around enough cells to write personals. Just wanted to wish everyone a happy week. :rant:

Hey guys... I just came in to get a little catch up on the reading before getting everything together for the weekend cabin jaunt. Not to be picky... but damn I wish we had running water and sewer there! It's beautiful... it's quiet...smells wonderful... UNTIL... we both reek from being around the campfire... working ...raking... hauling rocks... etc... then WE overshadow the lovely smell of the woods...lol. Oh well... at least it is only 50 minutes from home... if we get too icky we can just come home! Kat... WELCOME TO BANDLAND!!!! My first year with my band was terrific and I know you are going to have great success with your new tool! I don't have time for personals but I just wanted to send wishes for everyone to have a great weekend! Oh... I haven't given in to the cravings... still smoke free but if I keep eating like this I'm going to croak anyway so I'm not sure it matters...lol. TTFN Darcy

Hey All... Well... I should tell you that I have had two glasses of wine while preparing dinner... so I am very relaxed and amiable! Today has been an introspective type of day... wondering what the heck is wrong with my brain!!!???!!! Ladies... I literally can not stop myself from binging from eating. I am going to make another appointment for a second fill but honestly... I have my doubts on how effective that will be. I am not eating because I am hungry... I just have this compulsion to shove something in my mouth every five seconds!!!! (I'm glad my hubby isn't here to make a comment on that!) Patty... I remember praying that my ex would find a significant other... when he did... I was sooooooooooo happy!!!! Unfortunately ther is not a woman alive that can tolerate him... it didn't last and 10 years later he is still single! Isn't it wierd to feel like barfing at the thought of loving a person you one married???? Sorry about the TIVO experience... I would love to have TIVO... we just haven't managed to check into it yet. I find it halarious to go into any electronics department... they always treat ya like a "little woman"!!! WHen I find a salesman or salesperson that treats me with respect... I treat him or her with a purchase... it's a lot like training a pet. :Banane20: Pat... Unfortunately... sex is a very powerful thang... hopefully your son's brain will grow more powerful than his...errrrr... physical needs before long! I am sorry that you are missing out on your grandbaby... (((Hugs))) Bubbame... I'm so glad this meeting is behind you... I hope the rest of the process goes as smoothly as possible. Again... Divorce sucks! Sex is the answer to every single problen according to my husband... hmmm... I'm prettty desperate... maybe I'll give it a try! Anybody have a cigarette????? :bananadoggywow: Cindy... THose doggone H.A.'s need to take a hike already!!!!! Oh... apparently more sex may be the cure according to my hubby. :fruitsex: Sherry... See the above comment to Cindy. :Banane57: Man... Your hubby is as crazy as mine... we had a guy slam into a tree close to our home last hear... he then backed up and parked his much disabled car in an appartment complex nearby and go tout and took off on foot... three men from our street took off after him and cornered him (one was my hubby)... needless to say... the driver was drunk and on his way to jail sooner than later and this was early evening at the time when most people go out for evening walks. I can't believe he didn't hit anyone! Donna... I am really glad you are feeling a bit better.... I think sometimes we all try not to pressure when people disappear from the radar around here... mostly out of respect... you are loved. :Banane33: Betty... You are so right... if I go out right now and buy a pack... I am going to feel like a big pile of poop... soooo... why am I sitting here planning the whole rendevous to the minute-mart in my mind???? Not going to do it... but will probably spend the whole evening wishing I could! I wish they would just outlaw the stupid things! WHo are things going with your sick faminly members???? Okay... imagine I forgot somebody... sorrrryyyyy.... I'll catch ya next time!

Hey Donna... I would have missed ya if I hadn't been off having my own pity party. Seriously girl... I know just how the whole outta control eating and weight gain situation feels... it SUCKS! Now... the pity parties are nice and all... but I think we have a better chance at pulling our butts out of a rut if we come in here and spread the joy. (((Hugs))) Patty... AN office full of kids... yikes... just the mere thought of that makes me want a big bag of chocolate! Good Luck! Rene... Smoking is evil... and stinky... and gross... and it makes your gums recede and your skin all leathery... and eventually your fingernails will turn yellow and get all clubby looking... and your breath is all hagish... THERE... I feel better all ready! Sorry to any that currently smoke... I'm sure none of the above pertains to you. :confused: Pat... Can I have the doggy bag from your lunch out. Cindy... A YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH... Okay... 3 months down... lol... I am going to lose my mind for sure! Eileen... hope you are enjoying your hookying lil hinder off! Oh... had to take my 13 yr old for her phyiscal today... LOLOLOL... she wasn't expecting to get any immunizations... WRONG. Bless her heart... she turned right back into Mom's baby girl for a few minutes! Had her little head buried in my chest and hung on to me for dear life! Off to do a couple more chores before the Cab O Mom Co. has to haul the dd to piano lessons. OHHHHHH... and I forgot to tell all of you that the remote electric fence worked like a charm for the ddog... it nearly gave me a nervous breakdown when she got nailed but let me tell you... the next time the collor gave her a warning she ran back to her human Mom lickedy split! It's so nice to let her out without worrying she will run out into a street or run off! Okay...TTFN

Morning All... Rene... there is just nothing better than a lazy day! Congrats on getting back to the pre-trip weight and I just know you will be in twoterville before your next trip! Betty... You know how many times I have quite and re-started... you are right... I felt terrible everytime I failed. I really don't understand why it is still so hard... it has to be all mental cravings as the nicotine would be way out of my system by now. I think it's been almost 3 months now... not sure... was a trying a different approach this time. I'm so sorry about all of the stress and sickness in your family right now... boy... sometimes life really hands a plate full doesn't it! Sending you big hugs (((Hugs))) Cindy... I love hearing that others have quite smoking and lived to tell about it...lol. Do you remember how long it took for you to really feel like a non-smoker and not have the urge to smoke? Dianne... You are really kicking butt with the exercise... hmmm... maybe if I keep reading your post...some of that energy will rub off on me! I stopped taking the Zoloft as it completely obliterates my sex drive. I guess I feel like intimacy is the glue that holds a relationship together... and things sure weren't sticky around here! I wish I could take Wellbutrin... but I have goofy side effects with it. I will have to go talk to the doc... the panic attacks are starting to wear me down. Eileen... *sigh* It tis twu... tis hard to come here and post when ones hands are full of Hersheys Kisses. :confused: Okay...must take the dd to school... TTFN... have a great day everyone!

Bubbame... You'll be in my thoughts... I still remember all of those fears and anxieties and even the nightmares from my divorce and that was 10 years ago! My biggest issue was the child custody and visitation situation and I agreed to a seriously low and silly amount of child support as my ex threatened to ask for 50/50 custody if I didn't. I have never regretted accepting his offer... he was happy and that meant my daughter and I were safe. I know some would say I was a mouse... but you know what... my heart knew what he was capable of and preferred staying alive to standing my ground. Be safe... be smart and eventually all of this will be behind you! ((((Hugs)))) I sure wish I would have met my second husband first!

Hiya Ladies... *Hangin my head in shame for being AWOL* Forgive me????? It seems we always skip spring in Wisconsin and go straight from winter directly into summer... not this year... YAY!!!!!!!!! Spring has been beautiful and I have been out in the yard buzzin around like a big ole bumble bee! I have to admit that I have also been pretty depressed... and I think I needed the sunshine and the feel of old mother earth on my hands. I still feel depressed but at least my spirit feels a little relief! I stopped taking Zoloft about three months ago and am trying to figure out how to manage the panic attacks and depression by more natural means... I may have to give in and take medication and or go out and buy a pack of cigarettes. (Ducking as Betty trys to bonk me on the head) I am pretty proud that I quit smoking and have managed to stick with it... but I have to admit it is a fight that I still battle daily. I stopped counting how long it has been so that must be a good sign. I still have some restriction... but mostly for the food I should be eating while the "bad" foods slide down without difficulty. I can't seem to stop myself from eating... it's not hunger... it's a compulsion. Anyhoo...needless to say... I am gaining. So... I didn't really want to come in here and shake my big bottle of negative karma on everyone which is part of the reason I have been absent. I'm a dork. Kelly girl... I'm so sorry for the troubles in your life and I so wish you could derive support form the friends that you have made here. I wish you all the best and am sending big hugs. If you ever need a friendly ear... drop me a PM. Pat... Sounds like you and your son really have your hands full! I imagine he must be going through a lot of that... "What the heck was I thinking when I chose this woman" scenario. When I look at my ex... I ask myself that question each ans every time! It is sad to wish for your child to grow up so that you don't have to deal with an insane ex. Cindy... (((Hugs))) Cancer is such a frightening disease... My father died of cancer at the young age of 41... he chose not to fight the cancer and enjoy the short amount of time he had left. I was 16 and had a difficult time understanding his choice at the time but can certainly understand now. Sending wishes for you and your family and your FIL to find the strength you will need for fighting this disease. Okay... I am trying to catch up on what everyone has been up to and have made a good dent... I know I didn't get a response in for everyone but you were all in my thoughts!

Hey Ladies... So sorry I've been absent... busy girl! I got this from my sister... it really gave me a giggle... Have a Happy Easter!

Hey Ladies... I guess I am really behind with personals now!!! Yikes! Had a great time at the quilt festival in Chicago.... dang... there is nothing like going to a fancy smancy hotel and being a hip city to make a girl feel like she is from the back woods. The nice part was that the town was filled with "normal" women wearing jeans and sweatshirts sporting theri favorite quited bag! We walked out Butts off... PAIN... oh my Gorsh... the pain...lol. We limped out of the convention center both days! Ohhhhhh my gawd... there was a quilt that was queen sized... hand stitched... hand quilted... made entirely out of little one inch octagons... it was stunning! Actually... most of the quilts were beyond belief! We spent... ate... walked... spent... ate... lol... I think weight-loss is completely out of the question! Okay... I can't remember who posted it right now... but the coment about the carpet matching the drapes sent me into hysterical laughter! I will have my hubby take a pic of the hair... although... I am already wishing I had had her cut it shorter! I think I will have a warmer red for the low-lights next time. THis gal ahas a little salon right in her home and charges 50 bucks for the cut and the full head of high-lights/low-lights so otherwise I would never have started... would have just had to go back to the old home dye jobs. I'm pretty sure I don't have the brain power to catch up on personals so I will just start fresh from here k? (((Hugs)))

Hey Chickies... Kelly.... I'm so sorry that you came home to such a wall of stress! As a family I would think it would be important to discuss things before taking such a drastic choice... but... what is done is done and it sounds like you are handling it like a heck of a woman! You are in my thoughts and prayers! I'll have to catch up on personals when I get back... (((Hugs to all))))

Hiya! Well... Was a busy day that included getting my hair cut and had highlights and lowlights put in.. I love it! I am back to gaining weight... yikes... guess I will have to ask if they will crank er up another 1/2 cc or so! I can't eat bread and chicken gets stuck but everything else goes down fine as long as I chew it to death! Crud... I can't believe I did not stop at the store to get creamer... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.... I am going to be a major butthead in the morning without my coffee! Hugs to all....

OY... looks like it's going to be a bad week for personals for me!!! I dived into the freakishly messy portion of the house that my daughter calls her room! I'm surprised I got out of there alive! My dog is sick again... so she is back on prednisone so we have been out to "go" a gazillion times to hopefully avoid accidents... I'm trying to get everything all caught up and clean before I leave... then I won't have any worries... Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Kel... I know where that one pound went... right to my caboose. Congrats girl! Cindy... I hope the medication combination works... what an relief that would be for you! I would love to turn the quilting into something that makes money instead of sucking it out of the ole bank account...lol. Maybe someday as it has turned into quite a passion for me. :ban: I hope to get my daughter hooked on it this summer... it would be something fun for us to do together. Eileen... Sorry about the work sitchiation... hope everything came out ok in the bathroom. :party::painkiller: Bubbame... I am so sorry that life is so stressful for you right now... I hope things get better soon! (((Hugs))) Okay...gotsta get going... laundry is calling and dd should be home soon... then it's off to piano lessons....joy. :party: TTFN

Hey Ladies... I just wanted to let y'all know I am not lost over in March's chat LOL... just having a VERY busy week. I'll try and do personals tomorrow. Also... I'll be gone Friday and Sat at a quilt festival in Chicago with my Sis. We are spending the night... watch out Windy City... a bunch of wild stitchin women are comin to town to bust a couple of seams! I should be a babbling idiot by the time we get back as I can't sleep away from home. Oh well... should spare my sister hearing me snore. Patty... I had that book... it was O.K... It is definitley geared towards the pre-banded and very newly banded. I gave mine to a new banster to be awhile back and she said she found it helpful. I wish I could have her send it to you as she nolonger has her band. It's a quick read... that's for sure. I guess I'd have to give it 2 out of 5 stars in regards to what I was expecting it to be. Okay ladies... I promise to catch up tomorrow. Sweet Dreams All!

Hey Tracy... I'm in Oshkosh... so probably not close enough to meet you both for a cup of jo. Darn! I was banded by Dr. Thomas Chua in Milwaukee.

WTG Leatha!!!! You have a beautiful yeard and I know just how it feels to mow one that big! We finally bought a riding mower last year and I'm hoping that will give me more time for the other yard duties! I love your fishies too! Congrats on the great NSV!

Hey Chantal... You can do it girl! Quitting the smoking is hard but you know... I'm 4 wks into it this time and I haven't punched anybody yet. It sounds like you are ready to kick some butt and with an outlook like yours... I'm sure you will be a success. I bet you look terrific... but if you feel your journey is unfinished... onward you must go! ((((Hugs))))

I have no problems with Spaghetti Squash. Bandayed... It's a big yellow squash ... when I cooked it I cut it in half... set it in a baking pan with about two inches of Water and baked it with the pan covered with foil for I think well over and hour but can't remember the temp. When it is done it looks like spaghetti when you scrape it out of the skin. I wasn't crazy about it in the recipe I used it in but am thinking of giving it another try!

OMIGOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How Cut Of A Face Is THAT!!!!!!