dylanmiles23

Hello all I know I haven't posted in a couple days, but I get my first fill today. Wish me luck!

Well everyone, i know it has been over a year since my last post. i am down to 159.5 and feel great. i have 30 more lbs to go. tthing have been going good and the wight has been coming off in a slow steady pace. avg 4 lb a month. i have been having some issues with abdominal pain over the last few months, its more muscle pain right in the area where my port is. idk if this is normal or what. it comes and goes, isisnt a constant thing. but other than that nothing new and exciting has been happin.

Journey began- June 22, 2012 (band day)
Weight- 244 (Highest 247)
3/3/14 weight- 192.8
Sizes- pants 14/16 shirts L
 
So much as taken place since June 2012. Some days it really hits me how much I have changed both inside and outside. I have a lot of people to thank for this including myself.
 
My hubs- For encouraging me to move it to lose it and for being my support. His encouragement has gotten me through the rough days.
 
My parents- for supporting me in this journey and for telling me they are proud of me. Just this weekend my dad told my hubs to buy me a new coat because they one I had was wayyy to big- this really made me feel good because my dad does not compliment people.
 
Lapband site folks:
 
Carolina Girl- for her no nonsense, this is the way it way of responding and blogging. Often she reminds me what this is really about.
 
Missy- for being the ever encouraging inspiration lapband rockstar. The way she responds to post and "likes" most encourages me to hang it and that I am not a crazy bandster.
 
Jean McMillian- for her responses, her articles, ect. This last article she wrote slapped me upside the head and I needed that Gibbs slap.
 
The great thing about this site is while you will on occasion encounter negative nellies and the general butt hole, you also encounter folk who know what they are doing, who have and are rocking the journey and can give great encouragement and support if you just listen with an open mind.
 
Of course there are days when I feel like crap and that I am a total failure, I think we all experience this at some point during the journey. However, times like this weekend when I try on pants and find that size 16 shorts are to big and 14's are perfect and a large shirt fit just right let me know I am doing this no matter how I see myself in the mirror. There are time when I still feel like shammoo in drag, but I am doing this- I am getting smaller and healthier.
 
So thanks to all who have encouraged, supported, listened, responded, posted their stories, blog - you have made an impact on this bandster!!

Who I am now isn't so important as how I came to be this person, wife, mother, grandmother, sister. The history is what formed me, challenged me to overcome, compelled me to do better than those who came before me.
 
I was born near the mid-point of the last century, in a large western US city. My parents married because they had conceived me when my mom was 16. My birth father was 19. As it turned out, he was a violent paranoid schizophrenic and a pedophile. My mom was later Dx with Borderline Personality disorder. I won't go into detail, suffice it to say that my earliest memories are horrific. My two younger brothers and I suffered the abuse and neglect until I was 9 1/2 years old, when a neighbor girl was assaulted by my birth father, he was arrested and sent to a state psychiatric hospital for treatment. I was taken in to protective custody for four days, while my mother was investigated and cleared of complicity in my abuse. He was not allowed within 300 miles of me, upon his release, 4 years later. When I was 14, he committed suicide.
 
My mom had remarried in 1960 to a wonderful man I refer to as Dad. He earned my trust, respect and love. They had two more little boys in the two years following their marriage. My Dad died of sleep apnea in 1978, we were all devastated and heartbroken...it was the undoing of my mom and my dearest brother. My mom turned to scotch for comfort, inviting my 17 year old brother to be her drinking partner. My mom died 8 miserable years later of pancreatic cancer. Those 8 years were awful, watching my mom decline, my brothers suffer. She raged constantly, told me often that I had no idea of her pain, her suffering. She made life a living hell for her family and circle of friends. She was diagnosed and died in 12 short weeks later.
My brother died 14 years later, the victim of a predatory female who took advantage of his alcoholism, a recent injury, subbed his Rx pain Meds with extra strength Tylenol. Took him 3 weeks to die of liver failure, on our dad's birthday. My heart was broken. This brother was the first male I had in my life who loved me unconditionally. He was born when I was 11 and he was like a son to me. He was my husband's best buddy, my kids favorite uncle, everybody loved him. Yes, he was an alcoholic, very high functioning, but losing him was the saddest event of my life to date.
 
My brother has been gone for 12 years...I think of him every day. I remember my little grandkids running up to the car when I'd arrive at their house, all four of them would climb in the car hugging me, asking me "...is you sad? Did your Brubbie die? Sorry *****, usses loves you! ". They did this for months, until I finally told them I felt better because they healed my broken heart. I have 8 grandkids 6 teens, 2 in their twenties. The youngest 4 are all the same age, 3 identical girls and a boy. I am blessed.
 
Of my four siblings, two have passed. The oldest, died at age 51 as a transient. He inherited the mental illness genes and I never saw him after my mother's death. The next oldest lives in NM, his mind ravaged by years of alcohol and drug abuse. We have minimal contact thru FB. The youngest has never been able to form healthy relationships with anyone...I see him once per year when he comes to visit. He misses his big brother too. He tells me that his true home is wherever I am. I wish my mom had let me take him when he was 15 and she went on her 8 year binge.
 
So...this is my emotional history, in a nutshell. The other stuff doesn't matter, except to say that my family is healthy, successful and happy. We celebrate often, mourn together when the time comes and love and support each other faithfully. My kids have all been married to their HS sweethearts for over 20 years each. We have done better than the generation before us...the bar was low on my side, but my husband and his family were great role models. I'm thankful every day for their love, support and example. I miss them painfully.

So im feeling more sensitive lately about my weight than ever before and im about 50 days out still for my surgery! I was doing really good and lost 3 pounds in a week and now im eating for all the wrong reasons again. I questioned my husband on him being faithfull and broke down crying cause i cant understand why he is with me when im not a skinny beautiful wife. I dont know if this is normal before surgery or not but i guess im putting a lot of pressure on myself to get healthy and i have a lot of accountability to live up to. Im scared about failing i guess but then the next minute im excited and looking at all my old clothes and getting ready to be able to wear them. Im a hot mess right now i guess and hope these feelings get easier to deal with. Ive heard a lot of people talk about how emotional this journey is and i never realized it until now, and i havent even had the surgery yet! UGH....Any advice??

How many times have I heard this. Everyone with the band is not going to lose weight at a high rate of speed. To me a loss is a loss whether it be a pound or an ounce. Many factors play in to weight loss and they are consuming less calories then you burn, getting 8 or more hours of sleep, moving your bowels regularly, eating high protein meals with good carbs such as vegetables and fruit and moving.
 
Actually wheat products such as wheat breads and pastas have been proven to be no better then white bread and pastas and may even cause more weight gain. Yes, gluten is a real problem. But the problem is not just gluten. In fact, there are three major hidden reasons that wheat products, not just gluten (along with sugar in all its forms) is a major contributor to obesity, diabetes, heart disease, cancer, dementia, depression and so many other modern ills.
 
 
How Wheat -- and Gluten -- Trigger Weight Gain, Prediabetes, Diabetes and More
This new modern wheat may look like wheat, but it is different in three important ways that all drive obesity, diabetes, heart disease, cancer, dementia and more.
It contains a Super Starch -- amylopectin A that is super fattening.
It contains a form of Super Gluten that is super-inflammatory.
It contains forms of a Super Drug that is super-addictive and makes you crave and eat more.

 
So if you have changed over to wheat products and are not losing this may be why. It really isn't wheat anymore but a bunch of fillers so that may impeade your weight loss.
 
There are many reasons why you may not be losing as much as others, but I say keep doing what you are doing and eventually you will get to goal. It can take two years to lose 100lbs that is not uncommon. Yes you want it off now because you had surgery but the slower the better and if you lose weight slowly you will be more apt to keep it off long term.

My name is Katie, currently 24 y.o. I am 3 months post op have lost 32lbs as of right now. I am mostly doing this blog to record my journey for future reference in life. My lap band journey begins when I was pre-diabetic, had HTN and hyperlipidemia and very much obese. I had looked into getting lap band at the begining of 2012 since my insurance would cover 90%. It spaked my interest instantly. I went to all the classes required by my insurance at first didnt take it to serious, but now i realize what it prepares you for. I always felt like an outcast when i was with my friends. I was always the biggest and felt like my guy friends always saw me as a "Dude". I hated going shopping for clothes because of my size. I was always tired and cheeks red and had headaches everyday. I had a previous medical dx, that would lead me to have CHF in the future if i didnt change my ways. I work with patients who have CHF everyday and i saw how they struggled and that lead me to want to CHANGE. I am only 24 and this was a big descion. When i metioned the idea to my husband and family, they were shocked because I wasnt that big as they said. I needed their support before I started the program and I got everyone on board and started my process.
Surgery day arrives, my husband was a nevous wreck. He was sick to his stomach worried until he got the news I was out of surgery and doing okay. My first question to the nurse in PACU was " did he say how my liver looked". You do the 10 day pre surgery liquid diet to shrink your liver and lose some weight before surgery, and what do you know my liver was small and he was pleased with the results.
Since surgery I have had 2 fills and have a total of .4 in my band and right now i am very happy. Im going to keep up my good work of dieting and exercising. And in the near future i hope to run in the color run and tough mudder.

As you know I reached my goal a couple of months ago and am now in the maintenance stage of my journey. Simple, all I have to do is maintain my weight.
 
I still check in with my doctor every four weeks (my choice not his).
 
This last month has been full of ups and downs with a lot of changes, basically life has been happening. I had to battle the head hunger on more than one occasion.
 
Then about a week and a half ago I started noticing that my daily calorie intake was creeping up. 10 calories more, then 20, then 30, etc… I was starting to get hungry (physical hunger) in between breakfast and lunch, this hasn't happened since bandster hell.
 
That was the deciding factor for me, I needed a fill.
 
I went for my four week checkup today and to no surprise I was up two pounds. After discussing things with my doctor I got the fill I wanted (just a small one .2cc).
 
My point here is that once you reach your goal you’re not done. In fact, It’s harder to maintain your weight that to loose, in my opinion.
 
Guess I need to change my ticker now.

I just finished my psyc eval and my last nutrition appointment, but I'm finally finished. And in classic Group Health fashion, my 2 years of health records still have not made it to the clinic, I hope that they make it there soon so that the insurance coordinator at the clinic can send in all my paperwork to my insurance company. She told me that I should expect an answer in about 2 weeks. Then I will be able to set a date for surgery, and I only have to do 7 days of pre op diet, so I'm hoping I can get the surgery on the 21 of March. The clinic that I am going to doesnt do surgeries on Fridays, so I hope I can get banded on Thursday, so I only have to take 2 days off from work. Pray for my approval please.
Happy losing!
 

Before you know it, it will be dreaded swim suit time. I live at a condo and do go to the pool. I don't mind it because I was never the biggest. But this summer I will need a new swim suit. For women (sorry men) there is a wonderful site where I buy my suits from, swimsuitsforall. I really like their choices and have bought cover ups, too. They always have great sales.
Another site I like is, Jones New York. They have great sales sometimes. The site is much less than stores when there is a sale. I recently bought a twin set with shipping for under $35. and list was over $150. I now fit into the misses xlarge but have bought from their plus sizes at their outlet store.
Kohl's has wonderful 't' shirt type tops that when on sale are under $10. and they wash real well. The long sleeved ones recently were under $7. I own a lot of them.
Have fun shopping.

So just like my title say's time is flying by. One minute I couldn't wait to get banded, then I got banded. Now I'm one week away from my first fill. Just thought I would share this.

After spending a lot of time on LBT and now having some experiences under my belt, I have come to the conclussion that the LB is like a game of Chutes & Ladders.
 
We start our surgery and we're going along and climb a few LADDERS by losing weight and then we might do something not so smart, get stuck, not enough protein or water, injuries, sickness etc... and we hit the CHUTES, back to shakes, rethink how and what we're eating.
 
The best part is there is always a winner, as long as you don't give up the game.
 
Just my thoughts

Morning
 
Well I got to see my primary care physician this morning and she was good with me starting my fills again. Now I just have to wait for the approval in the mail from Cigna. I just hope my surgeon will be as kind as my primary care physician.
 
Notes to self
 
- log anything that touches my lips
- dance at least three times a week
- finish reading "Before and After"
- check in with my band buddies
- don't beat myself up if I screw up
 
Plus side ... Down 3 more lbs

I will be getting my first fill this week. Excited and nervous all at the same time! I think I'm ready for one because I've been stuck at the exact same weight for weeks now except for the few days that I had a terrible virus and dropped almost 10 pounds but eventually that all came right back and I went back to the same weight. It's been a little frustrating! I'm trying to remind myself that I'm still healing and my body is still adjusting to losing those first 20 pounds rather quickly. My clothes fit better but I would still like to see the scale move again! How did your first fill go? Any advice? I'm worried about "stuck" episodes because I really haven't had one of those yet. Gotta remember to take those small bites and chew,chew,chew! That's been hard for me thus far! Keep me in your thoughts and prayers this week please!

So I started my journey on January 7 and has since lost a total of 26 pounds. Now I'm happy about my weight loss but I'm really happy about fitting into a pair of jeans I haven't worn in a whole year. It's the little steps that count. :wub:

This morning got up early and went to my son's house. Last week my grandson was 13 and we had to bring him his b. day gifts. My son went and bought fresh made bagels. I was polite and asked for 1/4 of a bagel and he put Smart Balance on it. Nothing. That is how I felt about eating a former breakfast food. Nothing. I can live without them. I loved that. Some foods I can not go without but bagels are on the good bye list.
On my never live without list is pizza, bread in restaurants, almonds, pasta and Chinese food. I think that is it. If you can't have what you really love and enjoy yourself the Band will not work with you because you will go after all these forbidden foods. Or that is how I see it with me.
Have a wonderful weekend and hopefully no storms where you live.
"Eye Candy"

This morning got up early and went to my son's house. Last week my grandson was 13 and we had to bring him his b. day gifts. My son went and bought fresh made bagels. I was polite and asked for 1/4 of a bagel and he put Smart Balance on it. Nothing. That is how I felt about eating a former breakfast food. Nothing. I can live without them. I loved that. Some foods I can not go without but bagels are on the good bye list.
On my never live without list is pizza, bread in restaurants, almonds, pasta and Chinese food. I think that is it. If you can't have what you really love and enjoy yourself the Band will not work with you because you will go after all these forbidden foods. Or that is how I see it with me.
Have a wonderful weekend and hopefully no storms where you live.
"Eye Candy"

Today I'm one month post up I down 15 pounds!! I'm continuing to learn more everyday and follow the rules!

Well I guess that big step is over with, I have a new friend now, I am not sure what to name it yet! lol As I have been told, the port sight will be the most painful area, and I agree to that. Keep the liquid vicodin going and ice packs help alot. I am nervous to make a wrong move or sip water too much. But I am learning. My Husband is an awesome nurse and assistant through my lap band procedure. I figured I would put a shout out to my latest status. God bless all ! keep up the great work, and thanks for listening.

This morning got up early and went to my son's house. Last week my grandson was 13 and we had to bring him his b. day gifts. My son went and bought fresh made bagels. I was polite and asked for 1/4 of a bagel and he put Smart Balance on it. Nothing. That is how I felt about eating a former breakfast food. Nothing. I can live without them. I loved that. Some foods I can not go without but bagels are on the good bye list.
On my never live without list is pizza, bread in restaurants, almonds, pasta and Chinese food. I think that is it. If you can't have what you really love and enjoy yourself the Band will not work with you because you will go after all these forbidden foods. Or that is how I see it with me.
Have a wonderful weekend and hopefully no storms where you live.
"Eye Candy"

And no, I am not talking about the size of my butt!
 
Just looking at my ticker and based on my surgeon's first goal for me, I am over have way there, but as many veterans have warned me weight loss has slowed, but is still on a downward trend. It would be nice to extrapolate based on what I have lost so far as to how long it will take me to meet that goal, but WLS doesn't work that way.
 
My spin classes have been giving me great cardio, and building my leg muscles but they have also been playing havoc with the scale. As my body retains water to deal with the micro tears that encourage new muscle growth, the scale stays the same (or climbs) for days on end, then one morning I will get up and have dropped 3-4 pounds from one night to the next. But if I am logging my food, and exercise I can pretty much ignore this by knowing what is real.
 
Next step is adding in strength training, since I don't want a lot of upper body mass, low weights and lots of repetition will tone my upper body without making me look like the Hulk.

So when I started my blog, I promised to be open and honest about as much as I possibly can with progress with the band. I want my blog to be a place where newbies or those going in for their diet visits to get some honest info. No scare tactics, no BS.
 
So I have read the boards and forums but I have never seen anyone say step by step what it is like to get a fill. Today I went for my first fill and this is step by step how it happened.
 
First I had a meeting with my dietitian. I had tons of questions for her today. I was upset that I had seemed to stall out on my weightloss. She said in fact I had lost more weight that I was unaware of. She also explained with the amount of exercise I have been doing, I am building muscle even though I am only doing cardio right now. So she explained the muscle will weigh more than the fat and eventually I will start to lose again. She told me to calm down and stop wigging out. My husband and I have decided I should not use the scale anymore at home to weigh myself. It drives me nuts and is obviously not accurate. I just bought a new one and it still drives me bonkers. I absolutely love my dietitian. She was very patient with me today. She explained in detail how the fill helps. I was confused as to why the fill is supposed to help when I am already only getting about 800 cals a day. However, I also have the plication. Because I was unfilled sometimes I would eat just a tiny bit too much. By the time the food got to the plicated part of my stomach I would be uncomfortable but just a little. She explained to me the nerves that tell us we are full are at the top of our stomachs. The goal is for my band to put gentle pressure on my stomach so that the nerves are triggered easier to tell me I am full. That was I will not over eat with that one more tiny bite that sends me into discomfort.
 
After I spoke with her it was time to get the fill.
 
First the nurse took me back to the fill room, had me lay down and looked for my port with the ultra sound machine. Once the port was located, she then put iodine on the port location.
 
Once I was prepped and ready the doctor came in. Now, my doctor is the kind of doctor who is very friendly and chatty. At the same time he is a no bullshit kind of guy. If you are messing up he is going to tell you. So he comes in chatting away and I am immediately put at ease. He numbs the port site with lidocaine. Honestly this was the worst part with a tiny burning sting. I have had kids.. this aint nothin... so they say.
 
Once the port area is numb, Dr. DeBarros then put the needle for the saline into the port. The nurse helped me stand up and handed me a cup of water. Dr. D told me to drink the water while he was doing the fill. He was looking for the point where the water would back up. So the funny part was because I am used to sipping he kept telling me to drink faster. So about the third time he said that I stopped and said.. You are not supposed to do that on the band, Dr. D. He just laughed and said, "I didn't say stop." Now all of this took about 5-10 minutes start to finish.
 
They he asked me about my exercise and was surprised I am already up to 45 minutes a day. He said I was doing great. My diet for the next few days is to move up each stage one day at a time. Today is clear liquids, tomorrow fulls, Sunday will be mushy and then i can work my way up. My next fill appt is set for March 22. If I do not feel like I need one I will just go in for a check up and talk to the dietitian. I am so happy that I get to go visit the office once a month. I cannot imagine having a procedure where you see the doctor once and that is it. I am supremely grateful that my surgeon's office has a full staff that answers my questions and can give me the education I need to succeed on this journey.

Stress was one factor that always made me eat. Well heck before the band I never needed an excuse to eat. But now some how when I am stressed, I just write. Sometimes people think they can sway your day at work, or in life generally but what they don't realize is that the more they keep stressing you, the better a person you become. It makes you stronger, makes you realize they are just one person in this whole big world trying to rain on your parade and guess what? It won't matter one darn bit in ten years. I will still be who I am, still be successful in my weight loss, still teach my nutrition classes, still fight for animal rights, still have a loving husband and continue to improve my writing skills. You can't always make everyone happy in life, but why let food get in your way. There will always be people who will try to spoil your day, ruin what you have worked hard for because they themselves have failed.
 
I had a client who was miserable to the point the doctor kicked her out of his practice because she wouldn't listen to him and failed at her band. She tried to make the whole group miserable but what she did not realize is the more she tried to make them miserable the more weight they all lost just to prove her wrong so that in turn made her even more miserable because she failed at what she was trying to do.
 
Don't let stress make you eat and miserable because its just one time in your life that you have to take the bull by the horns and know that food won't solve the problem but only add to your problems. Have a blessed day because I will for sure.

I had my first fill on monday. It went great. It was a really weird sensation, but didnt hurt at all like some people said it would, so thats good. From monday to this morning i have already lost 3.5!! i'm so ecstatic to not be hungry all the freaking time!! I did throw up the first time last night tho. That wasnt as bad as people said either. I think i just ate too fast and then drank water. I'm excited to learn about what having a band is like and what and how i can eat now. I feel like the journey has finally begun and i'm excited for the first time in a long time!

This is my first entry on my first blog ever. I was just banded yesterday, and so far am feeling very good. Just some soreness on the left side of my abdomen and some discomfort by my shoulder where I think some gas got trapped. Drinking liquids and doing all the stuff I am supposed to do.
 
Why did I get the band? I got the band to hopefully start to undo the damage done by 7 years of overeating that I couldn't undo through dieting. I did it because I couldn't do it by myself anymore. I did it because I am tired of hiding from mirrors and photographs. I did it so I could have some pride in myself again. And, so far, I am glad I've done it and grateful to be on the journey back to myself.