Jazzy Gonzalez

Well I've been over weight since I was 5 years old. I would describe my childhood as a good one. I have a very united family, which I love and adore with my everything, and super greatful to God, for giving them to me. The school part, well that was just not so good. Kids can be so mean, and say ugly stuff to you, that as you grow up it sticks with you, its basically something that you just never forget. I was bullied a lot from K-8 grade. It wasn't easy but I always had my family there for me, and that always helped. I used to stay a lot over my g'mas house and well, you know how grand mothers can be, over feeding their grand children. And I would also get very anxious and I would just eat and eat and eat almost becoming an adiction. As the years past by I would go to different nutritionist, gyms, tried different weight loss programs, but nothing worked for me. For me, I was happy with myself. I didn't see that being obese at such a young age was a problem. But then again you go into high school and things start changing. You want to look a certain way, etc. It gets frustrating when you can't find the clothes that you like, because the size is too small for you and you don't fit into it. And with the way people treat you, as if you weren't a human with feelings. It was tuff but I got though it. My mom would always argue with me about my weight. I would always say, why do you judge me so much. At the time being young and ignorant, I didn't understand why she would bother me about it all the time. There was a little part in me that knew she was right, but I always denied it. My mom would do anything to get me to understand how critical to my health being obese is. Then my dad would talk to me, and say your mothers is right. Being obese brings you a lot of complications in life, and he would give me long speeches. But being young and ignorant, the words would enter one ear and out through the other. When I graduated high school I was 17 and weighed about 280. I started to think more about the future and myself, but never acted on it. I would always say to myself, im never letting myself get to that 300 mark. I started college just fine. Made new friends and was living my life. But I was always tired all of the time, and would never go out with friends for that reason. I didn't feel so good of myself, self esteem was low and everything was going down hill. Going to class late, because I walked to slow, then i'm out of breath. That was a very big problem. Wasn't sleeping right either. So that led to lack of concentration and etc. After 2 years in college I stopped my studies. By this time I was 20 and reached the dreadful 300 mark. I used to blame others for my weight. But then it came to the point where going up a flight of stairs was leaving me out of breath. And I just had to do something about it. Thats when all of the arguing with my mother comes back to memory. I regret not listening to her. Because all she wanted was me to be healthy. Thank God I never got diabetes or high blood preassure etc. My friend had recently gotten the gastric bypass done and she was telling me all about it, and that I should get it. To be honest, I never consider weight loss surgery, because to me that was cheating and just scary. But then I thought it over and decided to go for it. It was something I really needed for my health. So it all started in the month of april 2012 going to the doctors, I met Dr. Dakin, who is just a wonderful person. He made me feel secure and safe about the decision that I had made. That was a very emotional day for me. I looked at my mom smiled. Theres was no need for words, because she undestood exactly what I was feeling. I'm just so thankful and greatful to God and everyone that has helped me to get to this point. That I am beyond ready for this surgery and this huge change, that I will embrace with everything I have in me