AshtynClaire

[size=5]In early high school, I was 5'2" and 125 lbs. I was built very cute & was a popular girl in my school with lots of friends and was a cheerleader. Life was great & pretty much everyone was nice to me & liked me. My sophomore year I got involved in a very unhealthy abusive relationship.. my boyfriend often took out his anger on me & had lots of anger problems. His mother died during the 18 month relationship & the abuse only worsened from there. I only spent time with him, therefore I lost almost all of my friends. I did nothing but spend unhappy time with him. I was very alone inside. Finally I started turning to food for comfort. I spent time with him every night, but we never ate together after a few months because he would say I was getting fat, or something of that sort.. so he started ordering food for himself and eating & I wouldn't, to make him happy. On my way home every night, I'd always stop and get something to eat & eat it on the way home.. that way, he wouldn't know I'd eaten & my mom would think we had dinner like a normal couple. No one knew about the abuse except for a few of his idiot friends, who encouraged it. I kept it hidden perfectly. Every night, as our relationship got worse, I'd order & eat more food on the way home. I guess I felt like that was my way of getting back at him was to do something that wouldn't please him, like get fat. In my revenge I found myself weighing 200 lbs. This was all over the course of just 1 year. Everyone at school talked about me really bad, and I lost a lot of people that I thought were my friends. Cheerleading was over, and so was basically half of my social life. All my friends resented me for ignoring them for so long. I finally got my parents involved & left him. He still tries to contact me now, but I never reply. I will never go back there. I think the abuse strengthened me, but now I'm left with all the baggage of it... 80 pounds of unwanted weight. After graduation, I looked at my graduation pictures and senior pictures and decided it was time to do something about this. I dieted, I excersised, and I lost nothing. I worked with dieticians and nutritionists and nothing still. My mom has a LapBand and told me it might be great for me. I decided it would. I'm starting college in August of 2012 and I want to start out as a changed, confident person. I want to graduate college as a completely new woman, with no baggage left from a bad relationship. [/size]

[size=5]I hope you'll all be my friends on this journey & we can keep up with eachother's progress :) [/size]
[size=5]just message me :)[/size]