Parker's Dad

I read this when it was originally posted and have thought about it quite a bit and have read all the responses. This is the women's room I know but I have to throw in a couple thoughts here. Mods feel free to delete but it will be nothing inappropriate. First and foremost, I would evaluate the drug issue for the safety of the child. I am not sure what it would be but regardless I would be concerned. Secondly. There seem to be a ton of trust issues here, and on both sides. You are not sure about the drug situation and it seems to me that he is not fully trusting of you either. Now it appears that there are circumstances that may be giving him reason to be concerned with your activities. Maybe he already thinks you are having an affair and the video taping is an attempt to catch something and not just a means of him trying to get some jollies. How long has it been since you have engaged in sexual relations with him?? Answer that and if you are giving him other reasons to think you are doing sutff you shouldn't be then....... As far as the masturbation goes, just think about it. If he was doing it and refusing you sex (if you wanted it), how would you feel?? The sneaking with passwords etc throws up another flag that you may not be completely honest with him and that is another reason to go hmmmm. I am not saying you are but something does not sound right to me. How long have the animosity and separation feelings been going on?? The longer it goes without being addressed the worse it gets. Now in regards to your thoughts of an affair, thinking that much about it thorws up another flag. If you are that far into really thinking about it and don't like your husband that much, just go get your divorce and save the guy some heartache and everyones dignity. I can tell you that that is one of the worst feelings ever. My EX wife cheated and I can tell you that had it not been for some major major self control on my part, things could have been a lot different. I have never been so hurt in all my life. Moral of the story. I understand there are always two sides of every coin. I don't think it is fair to try to blame all this on him when you may be just as responsible as he is. Both parties probably need to take a step back and look really hard at where you are and where you really want to be. Don't assume some of the things are all him and his mental state. Forego the affair as that will solve or prove nothing for anyone except that that is what you wanted. Good luck in whatever you decide to do but remember that there are three of you to think about.

Shady, I am still fat so I have my armrests lol. With the weight I did lose I did feel better and didn't mind walking but the small packed courses suck and the cart makes it faster and more enjoyable as far as not hurry up and wait.... Luckily I never lost any muscle when I had lost my weight so between that and getting thru the shot cleaner my distance actually seemed a bit better. Maybe not 30 yards better but maybe 10-15 on average. I really struggled a bit with a seriously nasty snap hook! I would be lined up nicely and comfortable, nice take away, clean and clear, good follow thru and that bastard would absolutely scream to the left. I am not talking a little left. I am talking about killing people on the next tee box left kinda stuff. After a handful of those and a bunch of WTFs, I quit and went to the range. Those couple hours on the range were some of the most eye opening and encouaging hours I have ever spent in golf. Seriously. Another buddy of mine that is slightly larger was watching me. He got me started with golf when I was way overweight and he said that he could tell a huge difference and helped to straighten me out. Once I got that "feel" back..... game on!! You will get it, I am sure.

You guys have me wanting to go hit some balls now! Thanks LOL!

Good Morning, I lost a good bit of weight a few years ago. I had been playing for probably 5 years or so and had gotten fairly confident in my game. Not great by any means but I had learned what I could and couldn't do and when I felt comfortable hitting a shot. You have done it so you know what I am saying lol! The one thing that I noticed is that I was pulling the ball badly after the weight loss. I suppose it was do to clearing my upper body more easily and a faster rotation thru the shot. After a couple trips noticing this, it was off to the range. A couple buckets and a couple mental notes and things came back around to what I wanted. Like others have said, if you have a good understanding of your basic mechanics, which you probably do with playing that long, you shouldn't have any major issues. Good luck and let us know how it goes!

Hey guys, Glad to see this. I figured that I would see if any of you had some 42 ish cargo shorts and pants that are not spoken for. I would also be interested in 3x-4x shirts as well. Working on this thing.... Down from 376 to about 310. I carry all my weight in the upper body so I fear I will always be in a 3X unfortunately. I would be more than willing to pay shipping. Let me know if you have anyting. Thanks guys, Dave.

Bingo. Here comes another man's perspective as well. If I was dating you (or anyone else) for five years and we were doing good and I knew you were thinking about doing it, I damn well would wanna know if you were gonna go thru with it. Especially since you state that you think he would support you 100%. Why would you not?? I think that if you don't tell him you would do more damage to your seemingly good relationship than by telling. I really don't see the problem if all is good between you two. It would make me think twice if you didn't tell me. It's a major thing that you're doing and he would probably wanna be involved. Oh and if you didn't tell me until afterwards, I don't wanna hear anything about the new truck or boat I just bought either! LOL.

LMAO!! PDX is correct. This is sometimes how guys are. Not bad, just the way it is... let me see your vagina! Seriously. I have only told one but it was good because he has been sleeved as well, otherwise we would have had one of these conversations more than likely. Some of my friends would be supportive, some supportive with a ton of questions, and some of them would have the smart @$$ed comments. That is what I would expect just to be honest. Anything different from some of them and I would start to wander just how blown away they were. I am sure that some of the ladies reading this thnk we are nothing but a bunch of beer drinking, burping, farting barbarions but MOST of us really aren't, it's just the way some start conversations. You won't hear do you like my new shoes, how about this shade of lipstick, or do these pants make my @$$ look big!! It's usually the intro into what become understood serious conversations. The ones that care are gonna listen from the start or give you a little ribbing and then listen. Anyone else can fly a kite otherwise... Guys will relate.

I couldn't decide where to put this one so I figured that most of it's gonna come after surgery so I put it in post op. Feel free to move it if necessary. I was reading another thread and someone said these words and it made me think about what I have learned reading this board and was amazed at the responses I saw stating that they were not told such and such before hand. What are some things that you have learned after the fact?? The things you didn't find out until you were elbow deep into this journey... Let's hear them, the good, the bad, and the ugly. I know that I am not the only one to wander this and I know that others looking are curious as well. The only way to learn is to talk to others that have been through the experience. Thanks, Dave.

Hey guys/girls, I guess I should start by introducing myself. I am 31 years old from Paris Ky and I am looking into getting the sleeve. I found this site a couple weeks ago and have been doing a LOT of reading at a number of different topics. Luckily I was looking around and found this KY portion and saw some stuff that I was actually looking for. A couple things that I saw were the mention of Georgetown Bariatrics and of Dr. Weiss. I would be going this route due to my insurance and upon several very positive suggestions concerning Dr. Weiss. I tried searching the hospital/surgeon sections with limited results. I would be very very interested in hearing anything you guys have to say regarding both the hospital and Dr. Weiss. I want to hear the good, the bad, the indifferent. How was your experience?? How are your results?? Complications?? Would you recommend them??? Thanks guys. Gotta run. Dave.

Hey guys. I finally got to make it to the seminar last week. Between work and family stuff time is hard to come by. I am gonna get the paperwork started but it will be after the start of the new year before I get anything done as I am gonna upgrade my insurance and it has to take effect. I have made several changes and am currently in the 290's right now. Weiss seemed OK. I expected more in depth info in the seminar but I guess that is just from coming here and doing a lot of my own research. We will see how things progress and go from there. Thanks for the replies. It is good to hear of first hand experience...

^^^ This. Your body may be going into starvation mode if you are not getting enough fuel. Sleeved or not this will happen. I have had to up my intake several times to break a stall a few times.

Is there such a thing as a conservative agnostic?? lol Not really kidding. I agree with a few things from some people mentioned above. I truly feel that there is never really a set black and white answer to politics or religion. I really despise the hypocrisy of organized religion, yet in the same breath I have met some great people of faith. Sound a little different to you guys?? Probably not, but just an observation. I can't get down with a lot of the lib ideas but some I do. Again, it's not all black and white, there is a whole lot of gray. You can cherry pick all you want from both politics and religion so you have to pick the lesser of two evils.

Don't fight it as you go under. I have had it twice for kidney stone stuff. The first time there was no issue at all. Woke up, doped up, no pain or nausea. The second time for some reason I was really nervous and worked up for some reason. I remember it taking a whole lot longer to go out and when I woke up I was screwed. I was so sick and nauseated and groggy. It hung around for several hours even after I got back to my room. They brought me dinner later. Salisbury steak. Needless to say, to this very day I won't even look at salisbury steak and the was 12 years ago!!

I see a lot of people adding vanilla flavors and syrups. I add vanilla protein powder to things that don't lend to the chocolate. You get your vanilla flavor and extra protein at the same time so win win...

I hate moobs!

Hey Peach, Thanks for the response. Where are you from in KY?? I will be ending up in Georgetown with Weiss, like you because of insurance. Doing a ton of research and looking so all info and advice is appreciated. Thanks, Dave.

I think Bean pretty much nailed this one. There are a few things that make this situation very stressful. Money issues suck and will strain even the best of relationships. A big focus would be getting out of anyones house. I could not live with my parents or my girlfriends parents. If I want to walk around my house in my underwear I can lol. Not really kidding there, everyone needs their own space. The weed and the religious parents scenario do not work at all. If you can live with the weed use then that's fine. It's just not gonna work in that situation. As far as him thinking you are gonna leave.... I think that is almost always gonna be a natural thought like it or not. I don't know anything about his past relationships but maybe that has been an issue, maybe not. It has been for me. My exwife was a "religious" person, her mom, etc. She starts a new job and starts listening to people and doing things she shouldn't have been. Needless to say one thing lead to another and that was a done deal. Now I come from that better for it. Lesson learned. Now I don't trust anyone fully and never will. Take that into consideration. Now it was not right of him to cheat. There is no real valid reason for that and it is one thing that I personally can't and won't tolerate for myself. If you can get past that, more power to you. Now the very last thing that I would even think about pushing the issue on right now is kids. With the living arrangements, money, and insecurity right now, the last thing you need to do is throw a baby into the mix. This is just my opinion but I have seen things play out with different couples several times and this is kind of how it goes. Good luck with whatever you do.

Congrats and that does make you feel pretty good. Just want to say that women do not have to be little or tiny to be beautiful. Some of the most beautiful women I have ever seen or met are not those little skinny women. I like a full figured woman who is confident and comfortable in her own skin. It really is attractive. Hard to put into words without sounding like a weirdo but there is truth to it lol!

There are several great thoughts on here for you think about and all true. I have not gotten thru to surgery yet but I have this rationalized for myself. Take this for what it's worth, it's just my thoughts on it and that's all. I know I can loose weight. I have done it before. I then get a little lazy and lax up and when I do this I gain some back. I have managed to keep the great majority of it off since I really started trying but there is going to come a day when that stops. There will be a day when my body says "no, I am done, this is where you are like it or not!" and is gonna make silly faces and dirty comments at me. I have no co morbidities at this time and I don't want any. I am however set up perfectly for a nice little dose of diabetes. I have seen what that crap can do, and I don't want anything to do with it. EVER. I also have a 15 month old little boy right now and I am gonna be around to see him grow up and pitch a few major league games lol! The point of that is that I am gonna be doing this for me and him. Noone else. I know people lose at different rates and some have more issues than others. I accept that. I also know that in my mind I can lose weight and when I have this tool that helps even more, I know I will not fail. I don't really intend on going around telling the world I had surgery but it's gonna come up. I will tell the ones that matter ahead of time and I will address the others as I see fit when that time arrises. I don't find myself accountable to anyone but me and that's kinda how I like it. My whole point is that you are doing this for you, for your reasons, and it is your decision to make. There are things that you will have to work thru and figure out for yourself. You will lose weight unless you make stupid decisions. You can do it and you will be fine and you don't worry about what others say. I know that is easiers said than done but you have to wrap your mind around why you want to do this in the first place and hold onto that regardless of whatever noise you get from others. You can do it.

That is amazing!! That just goes to show you that with a little help (the sleeve), a bit of work, and a whole lot of determination that you can drop a lot of weight. Congrats to him and good luch with your upcoming surgery as well. I am still in a holding pattern waiting now. I come here everyday to get info and read of success stories to keep motivated to get thru to get this thing done!!

I go to thinking about it and I didn't mean to jack your thread. I just didn't think it was worth starting a new one just for that post. Carry on...

I love doing things like that. When I want something sweet they are quick and easy to make and not that bad really without the crust. If you like Peanut Butter and/or chocolate try this one... Cool whip lite/fat free whatever it is Cream cheese fat free Natural peanut butter or I guess you could use the PB2 stuff if you want. Chocolate Protein powder. Make sure the cool whip is thawed. Nuke the cream cheese just long enough to soften up and be blended with mixer. Mix those two first. Mix in the pb then the Protein Powder. You can add as much of the PB or choco powder as to taste but you may have to add a touch of milk if you're adding a lot of the protein. You can just chill it in the fridge for a while or freeze it in the freezer and it makes a great ice cream or custard type thing. I don't do a whole lot of sweets and when I do eat them I much rather prefer to have something "good homemade" as opposed to store bought junk. I wouldn't give you a dollar for a truck load of Little Debbie stuff. Therefore I experiment with a few basic things that I usually keep on hand at home and try to make them as nutritious as I can. Lots of other variables you can use. If you like orange try this one. Cool whip Cream cheese. Can of mandarin oranges vanilla protein powder. Mix the cool whip and cream cheese well first of course. Add in your oranges and mix again then add the vanilla protein powder. If you don't drain the oranges first you probably won't have to add any extra liquid at all for the protein powder. You can vary this as well with other fruits and even add sugar free pudding mix or Jello mix to accomodate what fruit flavors you like. Enjoy.

For what it is worth it has gotten better in the last month or two since I have been going high Protein low carb. So that makes me wander if it is the gluten deal?? I never knew anything about "gluten" really until the last couple years when I started seeing "gluten free" or gluten stuff on tv. It was to the point of imodium everyday. Since I switched up and basically eliminated all bread, Pasta, etc I seem to be about every 1.5 to 2 days. Never like that before. I notice that if I come off of the really low carb for a day that things speed up again for a day or so then I can start back on low carb and back to 1-2 days. Maybe TMI but I know I am not alone...

All of these sound like sound advice from experience. Keep this stuff coming. I love to hear the real stuff and see your info. I have read them all and appreciate it, the little stuff not mentioned by Drs. I know a lot of others are reading along as well....

I have a question for you guys with stomach issues and how are they now. I always thought it was IBS. I could eat and in very short time things were not happy. Quickly, like may not even take enough time to finish a meal. It didn't matter what I ate either so the immediate gall bladder thought was kinda ruled out. Dr says I have a "fast tract." Very annoying at times. Anyone have this before?? Did it get better??