WASaBubbleButt

Doesn't that imply it was an enjoyable experience? Is that really fair to do to the newbies? HA!

Yesterday I emailed my docs office about him. Turns out he's a really good friend of Gaby's, the aftercare person for my doc. The only problem with this doc is that he's booked months and months in advance. I have to have this done by Dec 5th. BTW, my doc's office staff fully agree with you. He's great, he does fantastic work, his patients like him, the care is fabulous.

Ohhh, don't forget the, "It doesn't matter what position you have sex, your band won't unsnap."

"It's probably your own fault barf"?

You forgot a few. Yes, I know you are hungry on Clear liquids. You'll live. Just tell me you are constipated, I don't need details of what *your* poop looks like or hard hard you have to push to get it out. If the color of your poop bothers you, might I suggest not looking at it? No, I don't know which Protein shake you will prefer. What can you have week two of your post op diet? May I see your written instructions? Then I can let you know. No, your doctor is not perfect and I'm tired of hearing how perfect he is. I know better. Yes, exercise helps weight loss.

Anyone who has an outdoor cat should be shot. It cuts their life by about 75%.

Bahh... six of one, half dozen of the other. :cool:

I think there is a PB but not what people think of as a PB. Ever drink a huge glass of Water with tight restriction, you burp, and water comes flying out your mouth? I can see how that is a PB. It's still a stupid term but I can see that being a PB. How about a pouch barf and a full barf?

Ahhhhh, a person I can relate to!!!!!!!! :cool:

If it is just jello it will dissolve and go down. Just take it slow and easy, you likely have swelling from surgery.

What specifically are you eating and what does it feel like?

So I take it white boy's wife didn't like the drums either?

I'll trade you my neighbor with FIVE barking dogs starting at 4AM and going until around 1AM for your music neighbor. 'Course, they are better than the coyotes that used to live there.

Well, some people don't like to rush into things! Makes you wonder, if they needed a heart would they refuse a new heart? I mean, it isn't exactly grown in their own body.

And it's a TON of staples too. Probably around 100 or more of them. They are itty bitty and three rows of them on either side of what was just cut. And lots of things are cut. Yes, I agree.

Ohhhhhh! I have another one. What about the people that don't know if they want a band or not because they don't want the incision scars. Stretch marks and 100+ pounds of fat are okay but tiny little incision scars are an absolute horror.

I was just now reading a post from a newbie that had their first PB, she asked if she had done any damage. An oldtimer chimes in and explains that no, they haven't done any damage. How does she know? Then she goes on to say that slips come from constant and violent PBs. She really should educate the rest of the medical community because I don't think they know that! I can see saying that likely one barf isn't going to cause a slip but to say flat out no, she didn't hurt anything... sheesh...

I agree. For the most part I have quit using "PB" and I call it what it is, a barf. There isn't a bloody thing "burpish" about it.

Click on "private messages" then look at the bottom of all the messages, towards the bottom of the page. Click on d/l to txt and click it. First you'll want to delete everything you don't want to save.

I was in the waiting room waiting for my doc once. There was a person there for a fill and she swore up and down she was only eat less than 150 calories daily and she was gaining weight. I was restraining myself and I merely suggested she tell the doc that and see what he says. She also swore she was doing hard cardio daily so of course, I encouraged her to explain that as well. Suffice it to say when she came out they were both glaring at me. She told him I suggested she talk to him about that one in detail. I laughed, I couldn't help it. I did ask him how he refrains from telling these people they are fibbing dumbasses and he sighed and said something about using it as an opportunity for an educational experience. Yeah, I bet the word "dumbass" still goes through his mind even if he doesn't say it.

It's not just banding, it's everything. People would be floored at the number of people that complain about suppositories being painful. Nobody told them to remove the foil wrapper first. If one pill works well, 10 will work 10x better. They take this same logic and apply it to their band. I recall a post where someone barfed and had minimal swelling. I told what my doc suggests after a barf, nothing by mouth for six hours. NOTHING. Then finish the day with full liquids. There was an experienced bandster that insisted that couldn't possibly be a good thing as they would be dehydrated going for six hours without Water. ??? There is one person here (not on this thread) that is a very slow loser. That's fine, to each his own. But anyone that posts a question she gives the absolute WRONG advice and then refers to how great her own weight loss is. Well, quite frankly it's slow and I'm pretty sure it's slow for a reason. She's been banded and reading posts for over a year, you'd think she'd know better than to tell someone it's okay to bump up the post op diet because her doc said she could. ORRRRRRRRRRRR! My biggest pet peeve of ALL message board topics. "I just ate fried chicken and I had surgery four days ago. Did I hurt anything?" AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH The post op diet is soooo critical for future use of the band. Why not ask before eating the fried chicken? How about this one, "I just got a fill today and I'm really tight. I know eggs are hard for some people and I just ate scrambled eggs. Do I need an unfill?" Or better yet, "I take big bites, I don't chew well enough, and I KNOW I eat all the wrong foods. Do I need an unfill?" How about another favorite, "I've been banded for two years, I'm having chest pain and my shoulder and arm hurt too. It's hard to breathe, what should I do?" How about getting off the computer dumbass and dialing 911 on your telephone? The thought never crossed their mind. I have a long list, I should stop. And I will after one more... the myths! OMG how stupid are the weight loss myths? If I eat 800 calories a day I won't lose weight but if I eat 1500 calories a day I will lose faster. HELLO?? Common sense wouldn't hurt. Since when does the human body count calories and use critical thinking skills deciding it will "hold on" to excess weight for fear of being normal size? Okay, another one. "I just don't know if I want a band because I might have excess skin." ??? You already HAVE excess skin, it's merely filled with fat now. I can understand the concern of giving up favorite foods, been there done that. But damn, I never made the claim, "I will die a long and horrible death if I can't drink soda again!" And loose and lose are not words one can use either, it's one or the other damnit! Wrk, you started me down a baaaaad path today. I could go on for the rest of the day.

Why? You can eat around a sleeve as easily as you can a band. Both are merely restrictive procedures.

Thank you. These old weight loss myths make me nutty sometimes.

I've lost over 100 pounds and I STILL don't see much of a difference. It takes time for your head to catch up with your weight loss. It's common and just keep doing what you are and things will work out well.

It's a few short weeks out of an entire lifetime. You can do this. If you want the band to heal properly around your stomach you have to do it. We've all been there. Just follow the diet. (Copied from a previous post I wrote) When you eat food your stomach has to churn and work to break food down so it can pass through the GI system. When you drink Clear liquids it virtually does little to no work. When you drink full liquids it doesn't have to work hard. When you eat solids your stomach has to work very hard to break down food. It almost looks like stomach spasms. Since it is the scarring and adhesions that hold the band in place and not the sutures (long term), when you eat solids your stomach is moving and churning and this prevents adhesions from forming. The other issue is that when they first started doing this procedure they made the pouch bigger than they do now. People were not losing weight with a larger pouch so they started making it much smaller. If you eat solids before you are supposed to you can actually push your pouch down and the adhesions that do form will secure the pouch in place but with a much larger size. You could end up with a larger pouch and weight loss will be very difficult. The only repair is surgical and then you start the post op diet all over again. I doubt most docs would redo the procedure because you didn't follow the post op diet. When you don't follow your doc's instructions you are only harming yourself. If you want the band to work, you have to do as your doc tells you. I think there should be a huge warning label somewhere that patients have to read before surgery. If you want your band to work you have to follow the instructions for EVERYTHING and especially a post-op diet. When you are doing clears/full liquids/soft foods remember that sugar, ANY kind of sugar or carbs will make you want to eat your right arm. Protein will kill hunger. It's the way your blood sugar and pancreas work. When you eat sugar your blood sugar increases. Then your pancreas kicks out insulin, then your blood sugar decreases and that sends hormones that tell your brain you are hungry again. When you consume protein it doesn't mess with your blood sugar much so your body isn't constantly trying to tell your brain you are hungry. Oh, you'll still have head hunger issues, but we all have that and that is a big reason we are fat. But mix head hunger with stomach hunger and we will fail. It's just too much. So cut out ALL sugar and most carbs, limit carbs to 30gms daily. Then bump up your protein and that should make it so you can manage post op diets.