LouiseC

Exactly. We have to learn to love the body we have, do what we can to make it the best it can be, but we need to accept what we can't change.

From recalling your pre surgery views it seems to me you were determined to regret this surgery before you even had it and I can not work out why you proceeded with it to be honest. Thing is, you have done it now. There is little point in regret as it is not like you can go back and undo it. You made a choice and now you have to learn to work with the consequences of that choice. Only you can do that and it will involve changing the way you feel about it. Your feelings are your within your power to choose and you can. choose to feel differently about it all. You don't have to be on these boards for more than a week before hearing all about stalls, especially at 3 weeks. You know this stuff already. What is it you are seeking to achieve by writing this OP? Is it attention you are after? Validation? I know I seem harsh and I know I am blunt. I don't often notice posters, I more read the content than check to see who is saying it, so recurrent posters don't often stand out for me. But you have and I have to say it isn't in a positive way. I am noticing recurrent posts of negativity and really all of that is going to lead to self sabotage of your sleeve and, basically, a miserable life. Why choose to be miserable when you can choose to be happy? Of course your clothes don't fit right, you just had bariatric surgery. Of course your body shape is changing rapidly, you just had bariatric surgery. Of course you can't eat what you want, you just had bariatric surgery. Of course exercise feels hard right now, you just had bariatric surgery. So you look dishevelled? Do something about it. Do your hair, give yourself a mani/pedi and a facial if you can't afford to get one done professionally. Choose not to look dishevelled. Clothes hang loose? Use a belt, use a scarf, use a needle and cotton, use your head and use google for ideas on how to turn what you have into something that looks good and feels comfortable for little to no cost. Choices. You have them. And make them knowing that you have to live with the consequences of the choices you make. Just like you now have to live with the consequences of making the choice to have bariatric surgery. You have to live with your decision, Janice, so you may as well chose to live happily.

I have been tempted to wear my heart monitor watch thingy during sexy times just to see how many calories I can burn! Haven't done it yet, but sure have thought about it!

It was just a suggestion as you seemed keen to have that conversation. Taking offence and feeling hurt are two different responses. I can feel hurt by what someone says without being offended. This perhaps comes with emotional maturity, with understanding that someone's intent was different to the consequence. For example, I was hurt because it sucks to be obese, and I was on some level in denial about that, and having an innocent child point it out brings me out of my own denial and forced me to face an ugly truth about myself. And it was an ugly truth. Fat is only attractive in societies and cultures where food is scarce. Fat in these historical cultural contexts has represented wealth and has therefore been seen positively. For a man in these cultures to have a fat wife it indicated that he was a good provider, therefore an attractive mate. What you see as people being brainwashed in societal views is in fact merely a representation of the biological imperative and in western culture, fat represents poor health and poor health is undesirable in a mate.

I fly at least weekly in my job and have done since I was 14 days out of surgery. There is nothing to be concerned about.

The first six months after surgery, the only exercise I did was walking. Then I started yoga (bikram and hot mukti). Then I started at the gym. Cardio at first, then strength and now I do a lot of group fitness classes. And I still do the yoga three times a week. I love it. I have found the trick for me is to do most of what I enjoy and a little of what I don't. I hate the elliptical so I give that about 15 minutes and then move on to the treadmill which I love, for example. I love yoga so that is a given and I am really enjoying the group fitness classes. I wear a heart monitor watch thingy to track the calories I am burning and I find that to be a real motivational tool. A Les Mills Body Combat class can burn 600 calories. Knowing that at the end of the class feels so good on top of the adrenalin high that is normal post a workout. Edited to add - I enjoy it all a lot more now that I am no longer obese. Size does matter when you're jumping about. It is much, much more enjoyable and things like running on the treadmill are now achievable for me without doing damage and that in itself has increased the enjoyment factor.

When we go to sushi places now I get edamame beans and miso, and sometimes I will get sashimi. I love it and don't miss the sushi rolls at all. Though I have seen places selling sushi rolls made with brown rice which I would like tot ry, I think if I did that one roll will fill me up and it still seems such a waste of valuable stomach space!

Janice, your comments are off topic and perhaps should be taken and used to start your own thread on the societal views of fat?

Yay for you! I don't know about you, but I still find it really refreshing when it realise I can go to places and not partake in something and still have a great time :-D

Really normal. I am a year out and sometimes I still think my stomach is a wookie!

I am also 5'8" and since losing over 100 pounds my shoes have gone from size 10.5 to size 9. I wasn't expecting this, it took me by surprise when my shoes started slipping off me! I made some people very happy when I donated some of my more expensive shoes, that's for sure! It has been an expensive exercise, replacing shoes, so I have been very conservative as I don't know whether they will shrink more! I did go and buy new knee high boots a couple of weeks ago and when I pulled the pair I liked and asked the sales assistant If she had them in a nine she responded "we have them in a nine but I am not sure if we have them in a slim fit, these wide ones will be far too wide for your slim calves". I almost kissed her! Happiest shoe buying moment ever. Especially after years of struggling to get boots that go over my calves!

They are in there!

This is another one of those things that differ from surgeon to surgeon. I was given caffeinated black tea while still in the hospital the day after surgery. I regularly drink tea and coffee with no issues.

It could be lactose intolerance looking at your current diet. Try and remove the lactose for a couple of days to see if it makes a difference? This can happen post sleeve and is usually temporary. It is dumping, it is the new bodies inability to process sugars so it sends it straight back out!

Of course, what my surgeon told me was advice for me, I would not recommend you follow advice that contradicts what your surgeon told you.

I am on 20 mg of omeprazole morning and night, so 40mg a day. If I miss one I sure know about it pretty soon. If I have something too acidic in between, like citrus, then i may need to take an antacid. It costs me one dollar per month thanks to the caring and compassion of a society that embraces socialised healthcare

Every surgeon and nutritionist seems to say something different. I was told it was fine to use a straw but just don't be an idiot basically. So I used a straw to sip and it was all good, I was careful not to suck up air. I used a straw from the day of discharge.

While it is not proven, and several schools of thought say it just isn't possible, there is a slim chance that eating collagen heavy foods could be good for your skin's elasticity and prevent wrinkles.........so you could carry on with your pork rinds as research into whether it leads to glowing skin! I know I love having chickens feet when we go to yum char restaurants and use the same rationale for eating their glutinous goodness, I eat chickens feet to stave off crows feet!

What about your intake of fats? I often see people who are struggling with hunger talk about Protein and fibre but I rarely see them talk about fats. You need to be getting good quality fats in, mono unsaturated fatty acids. Avocado, olives and olive oil, seeds, especially flaxseed, or seed oils if it is too early for you to have the seeds. These do more for satiation and are essential in helping your body burn your visceral fat. Edited to add a list o easy to access MUFA foods. The foods are calorie dense so sparing use is advised, but they do increase your feeling of fullness as they are fats and fats are a filler. But they are good fats so will help your journey to health in moderation. Avocados, Nuts, such as almonds, cashews, pecans and macadamias, Nut butters, Olive oil, Olives, Peanut oil. Flax oil Sunflower oil Canola oil Green olives Almond butter Peanut Butter chocolate chips Avocadoes Seeds Macadamia nuts Dark chocolate Peanuts Soybeans Tahini Pesto sauce

It is one of those things that seems to differ from person to person with no understanding of why. None of know how our bodies will react post surgery. I am one of those that rarely feels hungry anymore however post surgery I developed a lactose intolerance and can not have most Protein powders. The next person may be fine with lactose and protein powders, but feel hunger. The thing is, we are all different. We can't look to someone else's journey and expect ours to be the same. We will have our own journey. I am sorry you have the hunger thing to deal with. I imagine it sucks. But stick with it, let your body recover and find the new normal gap for you. Get your protein in and some monounsaturated fatty acids in order to reach satiation and manage the hunger. Failing that, look to make sure it isn't an acid issue. If these approaches dont work, then chances are it is head hunger you are dealing with. If so, then only you can deal with that by manages whatever you got going on in there that makes you think you are hungry. Good luck.

My response to this is perhaps not the standard. Children, especially young children, are brutally honest. They call it as they see it. And, let's face it, we are all here because we at some point we faced the brutal honesty of our own obesity. I am here because I got sleeved. I got sleeved because I got fat. Really fat. Others would have noticed how fat I was, no matter how much I was in denial. Most had the decency and maturity not to point it out to me. But kids are kids. They call it as they see it. When it happened to me, it did hurt. But what hurt was not so much the little girl saying it, but instead the fact that it was true. I was fat. It hurt to have to acknowledge that. But wow, when I finally did, what a turning point. As for the other comments about the kid in the OPs example - caffeine is a drug, and sugar consumption is out of control in the western world. I applaud their parents for teaching their kids this so that they can make the best choices in the face of so much marketing towards children of the worst foods possible.

Others have said it, mindfulness. It is a practice, and not one that comes easy to anyone I know. You have to work hard to be in the moment and to be conscious of your every action, thought, decision and choice. You also have to suspend judgement enough to allow yourself to sometimes not be mindfull. Sometimes you will make poor choices. The trick is to recognise when it happens, learn from it, and move forward again. Let go of any of th e blame, angst or negative self talk and instead take it as part of the journey of learning to be mindful and to make the right choices. One crazy and out there thing that has worked for me (though I am really aware this is not for everyone and I am a bit odd) is to actually face the fear of it all. I try to take back the power from the food. The food doesn't have power over me, I have power over the food. Reading what I am writing here I acknowledge I sound a bit crazy but I will try and explain as best I can. I would be more likely to go to the mall, go into the candy store place you refer to and eyeball the merchandise. I would face it and say "no", both to my internal voice and to any hawker of sweetness. Part of this journey for me has been taking the power back. The food is not in control, I am. It might try and be the boss of me but I have the power to say no and each time I say no, I feel a little bit stronger, A little bit more in control, more mindful and I feel healthy.

Great story and beautifully told! I think most of us can find something in there that resonates. My first few months after being sleeved taught me to never, ever trust a fart I still get occasional bouts of dumping. I know it is sugar for me, including fructose and lactose. We just don't get on anymore! Very recently I ordered a hot chocolate when we were out somewhere and what they served was basically a glass of hot milk with a chocolate bar in it that you stirred until its melted goodness was all drinkable. Now I have had small hot chocolates since being sleeved, I have had chocolate since being sleeved, I had early lactose tolerance issues since being sleeved but thought these resolved. Well, I basically inhaled this hot chocolate and declared it the most wonderful drink ever. We got up to pay and leave and I didn't even make it to the car park before the sweats hit me and I knew "go find a bathroom and stay there". Dumping is awful but wow it is a great teacher of what not to put in my body! This recent episode was a reminder for sure and I am staying away from sugars again!

That is awesome! I have found myself staring dumbfounded at a 20kilo sack of potatoes in the supermarket and just can't fathom how I used to carry around 2.5 times that weight!

I love this. It reinforces the notion that our choices are powerful, and that the choice to be successful can be as simple as choosing not to fail. Even when I make bad choices on this journey, I never see it as failure, quite the opposite. I see it as all part of the journey, all part of what I am learning.