~c~

I guess exercise does help even though i HATE to admit it!!! I started exercising and lost 4 eekkk 4 pounds since last week!!!! Dammit!I was hoping that jogging would do nothing and then i could say:"see it makes no difference if i exercise!!!" wrong. In my case of course it's going to be the key.When are we suppose to fall in love with exercise again???? Oh well,off for a run.

hehe, yesssssss! Since i have been on the losing side and feeling better about myself it's all i want to do!!(hubby doesn't mind!) When he can put his hands around my waist,i feel the difference and it's so much fun!!Not to mention actually being able to move...are we aloud to talk about this?!!!!hehe Anywho,i am going to get weighed this afternoon!Hoping for a HUGE loss.My ring is falling off my finger so i know the numbers are on the good side! I used to complaim that my hubby was always gone or going out but these days he stays home to get 'happy'!

Does sex count?cuz that's all i did last night and this morning! Who needs jogging hehe*blush*

I posted that question a little while ago!That noise is embarrasing if you are eating in a quiet setting with un-family members! I tended to take bites off my plate at work in between serving clients and it got so bad that i had to stop that!(my lunch is at 11:30 and i am usually not hungry) My restriction varies ALOT as well...

Glad you are safely on the other side!!! congrats and take care...!!!!!!! Chantal

Welllllll...ok! me too!!! I got an early x mas present from my parents... An eliptical trainer thingy( torture chamber)!! I asked for it!! and now i got it...if i don't use it i will feel guilty cuz it was expensive and they don't have much money to spare!! I walk/jog for 1.1 mile which takes me about 20 minutes.Haven't done it this week yet but i will tonite and will report back here tomorow! I can do about 10 minutes on the eliptical if i stop after 5 and go back on...sheesh! If i can do it ANYONE can:)

One thing i like to eat that is healthy but seems like junk food is a taso salad.The dressing lubes up the meat and everything slides down well.I use lean hamburger seasoned with taco seasoning,romaine and spinach,low fat shredded cheese,green peppers,top it with spicy salsa mixed with fat free sour cream and a handful of baked tortilla chips...yum! Even my kids eat this!!!

There's only ONE FLAW IN WOMEN By the time the Lord made woman, he was into his sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so much time on this one?" And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart -and she will do everything with only two hands." The angel was astounded at the requirements. "Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish." But I won't," the Lord protested. "I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days." The angel moved closer and touched the woman. "But you have made her so soft, Lord." She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish." "Will she be able to think?", asked the angel. The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate." The angel then noticed something, and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek. "Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one." "That's not a leak," the Lord corrected, "that's a tear!" "What's the tear for?" the angel asked. The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride." The angel was impressed. "You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything! Woman is truly amazing." And she is! Women have strengths that amaze men. They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy. They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous. They fight for what they believe in. They stand up to injustice. They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution. They go without so their family can have. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend. They love unconditionally. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards. They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding. Their hearts break when a friend dies. They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left. They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart. Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors. They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you. The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning. They bring joy, hope and love. They have compassion and ideals. They give moral support to their family and friends. Women have vital things to say and everything to give. HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN, IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

When i eat good, hard food such as a peeled apple or chicken ect there is this rather embarrasing noise that starts from my ouch and up my throat.Does this happen with anyone else? Poeple sitting next to me can hear it.For those who know like my hubby it's ok but when i eat lunch at my desk in between clients, it can be embarrasing.I just pretend like nothing happened!

Someone ask me how i was doing...good question! I find that i get really motivated,go gung ho for a few days sometimes a week or two then go back to my old ways of eating for convenience and eating for entertainment. I don't lose weight. Since my marriage had hit more than rock bottom and we decided to work harder,be kinder and more receptive to how we feel and talk more, it's been so much better.It feels different this time because he actually admitted how wrong he was and could see just how much he hurt me.I think he realized i have more confidence and would not take his bullcrap and WOULD leave regarless of the fact that we have children.He saw what he would lose and has made a HUGE effort.I am hoping it will last because it's really nice right now. Work is stressful.We are going on strike this Thursday and god knows how long it will last.Financially ,we are just getting by week to week and if they hold our checks it will create major chaos in my life and i am really feeling the pressure.I don't want to lose everything i have worked so hard for. I wish i could focus on something else besides what to eat how to it,feeling guilty if i eat wrong choices and the cycle of healthy eating versus non-healthy and how much i weigh,how much i need to lose.I have been thinking of it for the last fifteen years and i am tired of it.I wish all the food in the world would vanish and we could take a pill and never have to eat.Or a brain band that makes me just want healthy food and exercise. I made chocalate chip cookies last night and ate only ONE.I did not WANT anymore because i was still full from dinner.That made me feel wonderful when i actually thought of it this morning!I put 2 cookies in my sons lunch and sent the rest to work with my hubby, for him to share with his collegues.HA! Baby steps.... Chantal

I smoke as well.I would love to quit but the one time i tried i gained 13 pounds in 3 weeks and went out to buy a pack! For me it's too much to change so many habits at once.I want to get close to goal and have a good grip on my new eating lifestyle and getting into the habit of exercsing before attempting it again! Baby steps... Chantal

Woweeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! You look fantastic and sooooo happy! Way to go!

I work in an office in a shopping mall.There is a deli next door. At this time of the morning they start baking homemade bread!! It is the most yummy smell and makes me want to go out and buy a warm roll with a pound of butter. My mouth is soooooooo watering and it makes my brain hurt!! At least later i can look forward to feeling nauseous with the overpowering smell of garlic later on beofre noon... Off to eat my yucky egg and sugar free whole wheat toast with margarine!! Chantal

And that's why i beleive in ANGELS...they are PEOPLE like you Penni!!! I cannot even explain how this has touched me and returned some touching memories to me! It takes a special breed to work on the onc units.I did it for a few weeks but am not made of tough enough stuff.You need to be a strong softie to do that kind of work and i am in awe of all those who do! Chantal

My grandmother was ALWAYS prompt with sending cards or birthday gifts,they always arrived on the day. My cousin received his last card from her 3 days before his birthday on the day she died. When my parents were newly married,my mother was in the washroom getting ready for bed.She could hear my dad talking to himself and laughing.She thought he might have a few quirks she was not aware of.When she came out he FREAKED!She was confused until he told her he was CERTAIN that she had been in the dark room with him since someone was pulling on his toes and giggling! In that same house my mother was in bed reading,my father was working nights,she claims someone jumped on the bed but no one was there.The house burned down shortly after that.(no one was home) My parents now live on the Ottawa river in a renovated cottage.The land used to belong to a neighbors grandfather hundreds of years ago.One night my sister was sleeping in their camper in the back yard.She was there with her 2 small children.Her two year old was standing on the bed staring intently at the screen door like he could see someone and sreaming in terror!My sisiter was scared (shirtless) and started yelling for my father who was in the house.As soon as the porch lights came on the baby stopped screaming and calmed down right away. I worked in a nursing home that used to be a phyciatric facility for deeply disturbed/violet people.I worked nights.The bells used to go off in empty rooms and we used to hear voices coming from those empty rooms as well.I quit nursing shortly after those incidences.

"normal" people eat right everyday and pig out on special occasions.I know for me this used to be reversed and i am working on turning it around.With your weight loss it seems you have accomplished this!Don;t feel bad that you indulged in special foods! Just go back to your routine...you are doing FANTASTIC!! C

I don't know if i am allowed to post this here,let me know if i am wrong.I see this doctor and i love it so far.He has weekly motivation letters and achived ones.I thought some of you might like to read this: BISHOP, MD, HEALTHY WEIGHT MANAGEMENT ALTERNATIVES 1081 Carling Avenue, Suite 210 Ottawa, ON K1Y 4G2 Tel: 613-761-8015 Email: food intake, physical activity, and weight throughout treatment. Armed with this information, you try to reduce hidden sources of fat and sugar from your diet and decrease energy intake by approximately 500 to 1000 kcal/day. Record-keeping is increased over time to include information about times, places, and feelings associated with eating. You will become aware of previously unknown calorie consumption such as fruit juices or sodas. It tends to reduce but not eliminate obese individual’s tendency to underestimate their food intake by 40 to 50 %. Stimulus Control Chief among these techniques are avoiding high-risk venues, such as fast-food restaurants, all-you-can-eat buffets, convenience stores, and certain aisles of the grocery store. If you reduce exposure, you reduce consumption. Also, you will learn to store ‘trigger’ foods out of sight, to serve modest portions sizes, to keep serving dishes off the table, and to clean plates immediately after eating to decrease nibbling on leftovers. Cognitive Restructuring. Cognitive restructuring teaches people to identify, challenge, and correct the irrational thoughts that frequently undermine weight control efforts. Thoughts typically fall into one of three categories: (1)the impossibility of successful weight control (in view of previous failures), (2)unrealistic eating ad weight loss goals, and (3) self-criticism in response to overeating or gaining weight. You must learn, and to be pleased even with modest weight losses, and not give into “abandonment” when your perception of achievable weight loss and what is realistic don’t meet. Physical Activity. This is absolutely necessary, and must be looked at beyond calorie burning and more towards its over-all health benefits, from cholesterol reduction to improved energy to reduced blood pressure, to reduction in incidence of diabetes. It also is a huge stress reducer in our hectic lives! Think about all of these things. Indeed it takes time to change eating behaviors permanently. But you can do it. We will be with you until its done! Good luck. You can do it. Challenge yourself to do one change this coming weekend, and try to stick with it this coming week. (??no evening Snacks??) Dr. Doug

As some of you know i have been having marriage problems.My husband lies to me whenever he needs to at my expense. This past Saturday he told me he was going to a golf resort with 2 couples from work.I jokingly asked if J would be there and he said no.I am the jealous type. Yesterday i went to pick him up from work and J was outside having a cig so i went and spoke with her.She told me all about the fun golf week end they had! I told my husband that i want to be separated.It's not even that he went golfing with the other 2 couples and her even if they are ONLY friends...it's the bold face lies! I have no trust and no patience left for him. We have 2 kids who are 5 and 3 and they will be heartbroken but i just cannot stand to be treated this way any more. I am scared Chantal

I wish i could be in a room with all of you around me! I feel sick,i can't eat and i am near tears!And it was my decision! When i told him yesterday he said ok,seemed kinda sad and then he went to finish watching his tv show... kinda told me the whole story! Better now than 10 years from now! I know i deserve better and that is exactly what i said to him yesterday. Chantal

No...she was just looking around and then holy cow i didn't even see you there i can hardly recognise you!!!

My own mother did not recognise me in the grocery store yesterday. I stopped at the meat counter and she went the other direction.When she came back she couldn't see me even though i was standing right in front of her!!! Chantal

I don't feel like you are raining on my parade at all! It is drastic and the 500 calorie diet is only for weight loss. I do want to stress that this is monitored by medical doctors.They do monthly blood test,heart tests and abdominal test(for gallstones) It is safe but not a way of life.Once a person reaches their goal weight they introduce re-feeding to get to a specific calorie level to help maintain. Chantal

I have come to realize that i have been afraid of failing with the lap band and that is why i have been sabotaging my efforts. NO MORE!! I have joined a weight management clinic here in Ottawa.They have many types of diets and tthey all offer the benefit of being follwed by a physician. I took the 500 calorie diet called a VLCD.very low calorie diet.This is extremely strict with 7 low fat Protein choices,1 fruit and restricited vegies(no corn,carrots beets ect)They tell you to have 2 protein supplements which they sell(of course)but they taste better than any shakes i have purchased on my own and are sitting in my cupboard untouched! I take the hot chocolate.It taste so darn good not like anything i have tried...i actually LOVE it! I also have to take potasium supps.They had to prescribe one that dissolves in Water since the pills are huge!and my multi vit. I weight this am at home and it looks like i lost 7 pounds in 5 days!! I will post my actual weight on Wednesday after my next appt. I feel in control and soooo hopeful. I have also started exercing.30 minute uphill brisk walk in the am and 30 minutes on the elipcal.Every 2nd day included weights and Thurday evening included volleyball at the local high school. i don't know what clicked but something has changed and i like it!! Chantal

I have started drinking Campbell's chicken broth in the evenings when i watch tv.It's salty,warm,feels like a meal and for 1 cup it has: 10 cal 1.8 protein 0.1 fat 0.5 carbs Yum!

OOOO:eek I am at work at read the post quickly! I agree that you might be too tight. If i eat a salad first i can eat about 4 oz of meat and i am stuffed.As long as it's not tough meat!In that case i could not eat it. You should check with your doctor