Lindaloo

Yes... I'm doing well now, I've been avoiding bad food so far, trying to focus on protien first then everything else....trying to rehydrate myself. I feel so "dry" thirsty....even my skin is itchy. I know what I need to do. I need to eat right and exercise. The band helps but doesn't change that. Interesting about the larger bands vs the smaller. I knew they had to change to the bigger band for some reason. While I was on this three week fill adventure, I had to quit my anti depressants (I couldn't swallow them), deal with some rather annoying teen dramas from my eldest child, and couldn't turn to food for comfort or help with my emotions. I felt like a bug pinned on a board. Trapped and stuck. I couldn't move away from the problems, couldn't medicate, couldn't soothe myself, didn't feel well, and on top of that I couldn't even sleep. I told my DH at one point that I felt like I wanted to just get up and walk away from myself. (if you can understand that) I wanted to just "leave" myself and be someone else.

I got my third fill on July 1. I have a small band (holds 4 ccs), and the dr. filled me to 3cc. On my previous fills, I had no problems, I was on the liquids for a day or two then mushies for a week. I felt restriction. OK. So I haven't lost weight in a year. (I know. I'd been avoiding having a fill) I get this fill on the 1st. I can swallow Water in the office. So I leave. I find myself burping a lot right from the beginning. I start the liquid diet. No real problem at first. I do notice I have to sip and can't take big drinks at all. I am always drinking water and usually manage to drink about 3 big bottles per day on average. I found myself not even being able to get one down, but then all my meals were liquid too, so I think I'm ok on liquids at first. I notice I have to be careful. Drinking Soup is harder than colder stuff. I pb'd a few times. I call the Dr. and ask if this is normal. I'm assured it's OK, sometimes it takes longer for swelling to go down, I'm told. About a week into it I develop reflux, which I've never had before. I wake up throwing up, horrible...very acid. I get to the point where I really can't lay down and I'm feeling sick to my stomach all the time. I call the Dr. He says to take pepcid and see if I feel better. I do at first, but after a day or so it has no effect. I call again, exhausted because I can't sleep, feeling sick much of the day. I'm eating water ice and ice cream milkshakes. These are the only things that don't make me feel sick. Even water makes my stomach upset. They order a Upper GI. I go for that, and can see everything on the screen. The barium in my pouch is a dark mass, and there are thin threads coming down from the band into my lower stomach. I ask about the threads, and the radiologist says that it is the barium, barely eeking into my tummy. I get lightheaded from the lack of food (I couldn't eat from midnight til after noon the day of the test), and almost pass out. I call the dr. the day after the test, and they want me to come in immediately for an unfill. A doctor (mine's on vacation) takes out one cc, leaving me with 2cc in, a half cc less than before I got the last fill. Immediately I find that I can drink more easily and am able to drink about 8 oz of water in five minutes, which is great. Now, last night, we were taking a family member out to eat at a buffet. (we live in Amish country, it's a really fab restaurant). I get some mashed potatoes and gravy....and it's heaven. I missed eating so much. I just wanted to take the band out and be fat. I dont know how this is going to work for me in the future. I have an appt in six weeks for another fill (probably up to 2 and a half ccs--where I was before this last fill). I don't always follow the rules of the band. I've lost a decent amount of weight but not the ideal. Sometimes I wonder if I should have gotten the bypass. I need the discipline of being sick if I eat the wrong thing. But I was so depressed and flat when I couldn't eat. It was a real torture, as being a mom of 4 I had to cook for everyone every day and I couldn't eat anything. It was very hard and very depressing. I lost 10 lbs, but have to say, it was the hardest ten I've ever lost. In the beginning of the last fill, I thought...wow...this is awesome, I can deal with this for a while, losing weight and drinking shakes. But man oh man, that reflux changed that pretty quick. So many emotions...elated when I lost the weight at first, so quickly...then depression when I couldn't eat, exhaustion and lightheadedness when I couldn't eat. I was out with my daughter after the unfill yesterday and thought I might pass out. The feeling of being able to eat those potatoes yesterday...I was so happy, it was like I could feel every cell in my body be happy over finally eating again. My mind got clearer, I could think, and my mood was over the moon. What a rollercoaster ride. Sigh.

I recently lost ten lbs and in 2 weeks (too tight a fill) and I noticed my desire went up right away and I felt better about how I looked...that really helped. I mean, my DH isn't going to mistake me for a 20 year old who's never had children (4!!!) but there was a big difference to me, and consequently to him.

I used Real Meals Protein shakes, they were really good. Also I drink Bolthouse Farms Soy protien Chai tea...it's awesome and lots of protien in it. You can get it at Walmart. Hang in there. I was recently filled two tight and was on liquids from July 1 to July 20!

Awww...sweetheart....((((Big Hugs)))) If I were the boss I'd find a way to fire that person. I would think harassment and creating a hostile work environment would be reason enough. We've all had some experience with a rude comment. It hurts, no matter what idiot it comes from. Think about who you are, your good qualities. You know God doesn't make junk, and he loves you. If I never lost another pound, and even if I gained a hundred, God would see me as beautiful, because He sees past what this world does to us right to our essence, the person he created. Hold your head high, honey.

I never noticed this, or made the connection, but I'll have to monitor it next month. I do know that I have a huge jones for chocolate which goes down waaaaaayyyy too easily. I got a fill a little over a week ago and my period's just ending. I've been a little too tight but maybe the bloat has something to do with it. No chocolate this month....hehe...and I'm glad.

I hate to exercise. I've fallen off of the exercise wagon, but need to get back on.... I have four kids (ages 14, 12, 4 and 3) and they won't even let me go to the bathroom in peace, let alone exercise, and by the time they are in bed, I'm exhausted. I have a membership at a curves, I like them but you have to get there. I have the walk away the pounds dvds, and they are good. you can walk inside in the AC and not leave your baby. It's a good work out.

I got my third fill on Friday July 1st. I'm up to 3 ccs in a 4 cc band. I've never noticed much of a problem in my prior fills with some issues I'm having now. I'm burping a lot. A LOT. When I'm hungry I feel sick, my stomach hurts. I ate something with some pepper (black pepper) on it (I shook a little on) and I got a burning sensation in my stomach. I pureed some chili....way to spicy. Then yesterday I tried having a little spagetti sauce (out of the jar, not homemade and not spicy) and again, the burning sensation. Also, the heat of food, like Soup, seems irritatig. Cold things feel better. I've had some trouble eating....but I see steady improvement little by little. I can eat a very smooshed up boiled egg with a little mayo and some potted chicken as well as the mushies. I can only eat about a 1/4 cup at a time of anything. My doc is out of town til tomorrow. I've talked to his coordinator at his office last Thursday and she told me to call her this am to let her know how I'm doing and if I want to come in. I'm wondering what erosion feels like. Anyone know? I've lost about 10 lbs in the last week...which feels good, but i'm a little worried about my band.

Chick-fil-a nuggets are very small, and actually really just breast meat, not preformed whatever like the regular nuggets at most places. 8 of them would probably equal 3 regular size nuggets, so that isn't too bad. But the caramel frappes, and the soft serve is not good for the diet. Maybe limit yourself to one caramel frappe a week and one soft serve cone a week instead of every day. I like drinking Fruit 2 0....it tastes great, gets that good water in, and is slightly sweet.

Thanks for your response. Yes, I'm keeping Water down OK, and I'm drinking Soy Chai tea that is chock full of protien and nutrients for my meals. My stomach was rumbling last night so much that it woke up my husband! I'm going to give it a couple more days, I can tell things have loosened up slightly since being filled. I have eaten some yogurt and even a little cottage cheese and kept it down. But that's it so far for the mushy stuff. I did really need this fill, I was stalled and depressed and had just about given up. This is kick starting me off again, as well as kicking me in the derriere!

Well....the three spoonfuls of yogurt I had just came back up....and with it....a pill I had taken this morning. I've taken pills since I was filled on friday, cut them up, even one little one I take swallowed whole. Well, this was a time released Wellbutrin (so I didn't want to crush it or cut it) and it's rather small. Now, all day long I was drinking Water, drinking soy chai tea...I didn't eat anything except a piece of fudge (well, it was a holiday! and it melted in my mouth...went down fine) and I had about a quarter cup of chicken broth. I was amazed that the pill didn't go down, and that it was only partially dissolved. The pain is gone now. Guess I just had that pill floating around all day and finally it got stuck in the stoma. Wow. That pill is small...like say...a straw opening....is that too tight a fill??? Perhaps I'm still swollen. But I've lost 8 lbs since friday!

I had my third fill last friday (4 days ago). I'm up to 3 ccs in an inamed band. Since then I've been able to drink liquids (slowly) and have kept down some yogurt. But I've been burping like mad ever since Friday. (that hasn't happened with the other fills) I was woken up out of my sleep just now with my stomach making very loud noises and I've been having this dull pain that sort of throbs...goes away and comes back every minute or so. I got up and took two tums, then after awhile I thought well, maybe I'm just really hungry....and tried to eat some yogurt. This doesn't seem to be changing things for me...the pain is there. Do I just have gas? I don't know....but it hurts.