sue11

Well, after weeks of PB and slime (even on water at times) I had a partial unfill (from 3.3 to 2.8) on Friday. Instant relief!!! I was sliming on water on my way in and guzzling on my way out. Doc insisted on a EGD, because there is no explanation why I suddenly became so tight...I havn't had a fill since November. We're hoping it's not a slip, we'll see on August 20th. Good news is I can eat...bad news is I can eat! I've got some really bad habits to break now (carbs, sugar and fats...that was all that really wanted to go down). Time to show myself that I can maintain. I'm feeling no real restriction, though I do fill up on 1 cup of food, so I know the band is doing something. I've got 6 weeks before I can get a fill, so it's time for some self-control. Sue

The "anger thing is a real issue, and I'm sure many of us deal with it. People do treat me differently, doesn't matter if it's my DH or others, it can be a real issue. The fact that I am treated better now in many ways makes it worse. It "proves" that these people were judging me for my outward apprearance, not for what's inside. I do realize that my view of myself has a real effect on how other's view me. I know I act differently, how could I not, when the weight made me want to crawl in a hole and hid. I'm much more confident in how I present myself, and that's a good thing. But I do need to find someone to help me deal with resentments from the past. It's certainly not as easy as just slipping a band around the tummy! Sue

Well, I had my partial unfill yesterday (from 3.3 to 2.8) and instantly felt relief. I was "sliming" on sips of water when I went in and swigging down a water bottle on my way out. I'm a little scared because I don't feel any restriction at this point, though I've kept to softs for now, so we'll see. I hope it's not too loose, because I've got 6 weeks before I can get filled again. The doc insisted on a scope, to make sure my band hasn't slipped. It's been 7 months since my fill, so there's no real explanation why I got so tight all the sudden. Anybody remember the symptoms of slippage...I need to look it up. Manatee...was that the problem you had? Sue

Oh ya, I just called my doc to schedule a slight unfil tomorrow. I was so happy for so long with my restriction, but I've had alot of trouble with PBing and reflux over the last couple months...weird 'cause I haven't had a fill since November. I almost feel like I'm using my band to slide into the "bulimic" category. I feel things backing up and figure, well I'm going to PB anyhow, might as well enjoy. I did so much better when I could actually eat. Now it seems about all that goes down is the fats & sugars, my nutrition is suffering. I felt so much better when I wasn't so tight, and I'm not loosing anymore weight, I need to be able to eat good food in order to loose, and I'm tired of heartburn and reflux. Sue

Manatee... I'm with you on the dismorphia. I really think that alot of it, for me has to do with the fact that I had givin up. I always tried to tell myself that it just didn't matter what I look like, it's the person inside that matters. In a perfect world that would be true. Now I have goals and expectations that I am willing to acknowedge (to myself most of all), and I want to feel good about the outside too. I'm far more critical of my body now, even though I didn't want to admit that I did have alot of self hatred for fat me. I alro have real trouble accepting that people treat me different (especially DH). It's a real paradox too, because I would be so upset if he didn't find me more attractive, but I'm angry at the same time that the physical even factors into people's perception of me. I've looked around a little for a therapist, I think it's time to actually persue it. I get alot of "therapy" by blogging like this and from support groups, but I think I need to get deaper into it.

PS...good news is I can actually eat some again after a couple weeks of totally unexplained tightness. Still tighter than normal, gurggling on H2O in the AM's, but can eat some by mid to late day. So strange, my last fill was in November, and I've NEVER been this tight. I almost called to get an unfill, we're headed to Chelan & Idaho for 2 weeks and I'm a little concerned about Hydration in the heat. To top it off TOM will be visiting while I'm gone, which always tightens me up. Oh well, I just might spend 2 weeks working on getting water down...it will keep me from gaining while vacationing, might even loose, though I know I will eventually stall big time if I'm not eating enough. I've been at such a sweet spot for so ling, I really don't want to unfill. Sue

Hey Mer... Can't make it Thurs, we're going to the Rainier's game with my brother & his "girlfriend". He's been single for 6 years and has his 1st girlfriend...too funny, watching your 47 yr old brother dating like a teenager...LOL!!! They are so cute & giggly LOL!!! Any how, we're going with she & her son, getting the kids together for the 1st time...fun! We've got a couple of get-togthers on the 4th, but if we can get away we will pop in (if I can remember which street to turn on). Hopefully we can, but don't count on us, the kids usually get busy swimming & such and it's hard to tear them away. See ya soon, Sue

Tara... Thanks for the info. Do you know the cost of fills, and the initial apt? Does the Doc do the filles or is it s Tech/Nurse/PA? Sue

Has anybody used Fill Centers USA? I'm thinking checking them out, I see there is an office in Auburn. fleminlid... Congrats! Do you have a pre-op diet? Maybe I missed it...who's your Doc? Sue

Laura... I think you hit the nail on the head with "addiction". My name is Sue and I am such a food addict! It's the one addition that has too be "controlled", others work by total denial, "just say NO"...but you can't just not eat...grrrrrr! I do my best to eat good stuff, but I still think about food ALL DAY LONG. I'm concidering hypnosis or something!?! Manatee... Yep, I love clothes too...don't think I'm ever in danger of becoming a nudist! :sad_smile: Mischievous1... Isn't that what it's all about...turning fat into muscle. Just moving the scale leaves you weak & flabby, building muscle makes you strong & healthy. Sue

Mer... You're too funny! Can wait to see the dog's outfits...oh ya, and yours too! LOL Wish I could have made it last night, but I was on Mom duty again. Sue

Mer... Such is our life now...Whooo Hoooo!!!! LOL :biggrin: Can't make it tonight...hope to see ya soon! Sue

shome... Congrats to you too...sounds like things are going well. Take advantage of the next few days and baby yourself, you'll be glad you did (and probably regret it if you don't) :cursing: Sue

We need to PARTY!!!!! CONGRATS GIRL...at goal and looking GREAT!!!! Love Ya! Sue

Famous Dave's...YUMMMMMMM!!! You're almost there...it's all down hill from here. I had the same feelings...If I can do this, I can do anything! It was such a boost to my self esteme to succeed at the liquid diet. Be proud of yourself, and know that even if you have little slips now and then, you CAN and WILL do this!!! You've got a great new tool now that will fill in those gaps that used to lead to giving up, it's a new ball game now (yes, I'm watching the Mariners...LOL). Sue

PS...St Joe's is in Tacoma

010308... I was banded by Oh May 07. You are in "Bandster Hell" and we call it that for good reason. Total denial in the diet, but no restriction. I talked with nutritionists and others, and I don't want to tell you to go against your Doc's advise, but I did add a couple things after about 2-3 weeks post-op. I little teaspoon of peanutbutter in a Champion Chocolate protien drink blended with ice, and it's amazing how much more satifying it is...so yummy! I also made some splitpea soup and blended it to have in my last week or so...a real life saver! I didn't eat alot, 3/4 cup twice a day, but I felt so much better, hunger, energy and it really helped with my "water in water out" problem. I really don't agree with restricting to less that 800 calories/day, you throw your body into starvation mode. If I drop belwo 1000 calories, I plateau big time. Oh is the most restrictive of any doctor I've heard of. It gives you a great start on the weight loss, but I did seek the advice of a nutritionist and made some adustments to his diet. Sue

Laura...He is beautiful! What a great time of life! My kids are 21, 18 & 14, so I'm starting to see that in the near (10 yr) furture...what a blessing! Just think of how much more you can be involved and active as the new you...so exciting! Sue

I had such big plans for today...I've got 25 people comeing over for a BBQ on Sunday and I was going to get so much done today (my day off), but I feel like crud! Slight fever with body aches and massive headache. In the past I'd take a couple Excedrine and press on, but my band seems to be reacting to whatever little virus this is, and I'm "gurggling" on water. I'm back to refux again too...haven't had that problem since before band. OK, enough whining, just needed to vent! I think I'll go make some broth...yum?!? Ssue

Hi Dawn... The next St Joe's meeting is thiss Monday the 16th @ 6:45. Hope to see you there!

Manatee... Isn't that just the wierdest thing...I don't understand why the fill gets tighter after some time. They always said it would be tight right after a fill, swelling irritation etc... but it seems just the opposite. I've never really heard a good explanation why it would get tighter after a couple of weeks?!? I get REALLY tight every month (TOM...I know, TMI, and not your issue) but that's explainable...everything swells! Just when I think I'm ready for a fill I have that week that just kicks my butt. And I know what you mean about going for the bad stuff that will slide down :0, it's nuts & cookies for me!

shome... Welcome and congrats! I've got some good news and some bad news. Let's just get the bad news out there. You may not have restriction right after surgery. I didn't have any restriction until my 3rd fill, and am doing really well with my 4th fill (which was in November). Most of the bandsters I've talked with are similar, though many feel some restriction with thier 1st fill. I know I'm sounding like a downer, but there is good news too. I have talked to bansters who NEVER feel hunger from the day of surgery, I'm so jealous of them, but they really, from the day of surgury don't ever feel hungry. The really good news is that these 1st couple days are the worst, and once you get through them your hunger REALLY decreases dramatically. So, while you may not have restriction after surgery, it will get better, and in just a couple days, so hang in there! It's worth every bit of effort you put in. You will NOT regret getting banded! Sue

PS...Good luck on the fill...No restriction still?

Hi Suzanne... I think struggles with self motivation would be a common for the majority of us...I've always struggles with it, in my weight and many other areas in life too. I just want to do it my way...don't tell me what to do! It's the attitude I'm working on releasing. I think life in genereal is easier when I'm not always trying to fight for my own way. I find when I'm fighting for my way I'm usually fighting what's best for me. OK...I'm done giving myself a pep talk (incase you didn't notice, all the above was a mini-sermon to myself!!!) Hope to see you this week...I never really know if I can make it until I'm actually in the car heading over that bridge. Sue

Mer... I was disappointed that I had to leave early last night, I would have loved to chat a little with Dave, he seems like a sweety! Sue